October 3, 2023 • 27 mins
Picture this: you're strapped in, ready to embark on an intriguing exploration into the human experience and our incessant search for escape.
Our roadmap? Two classics of the silver screen, 'Half Baked' and 'Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas,' serve as our guides to delve into the idea of escapism, the transformation into a 'beast' to diminish human suffering, and the big question - is there really a way out?
This episode takes you on a journey, examining life from various perspectives. Drawing from a personal narrative as our compass, we navigate the critical role of conscious decision-making and the responsibility it entails. We transition into the essence of time, the quest for a meaningful life, and the cycle of disappointment and frustration that restrains us.
The power to create the life we desire is in our hands, and it's time to wield it.
We'd love to hear your thoughts on what you want to create and what's been stopping you. All aboard for this thought-provoking expedition!
Overcome the daily grind with transformative techniques from Justin's book, 'Engineered to Love.'
These practices aren't just about finding peace—they're about reconnecting with yourself and the world around you in meaningful ways.
Access your free materials today at engineeredtolove.com/sample and start living a life filled with joy, ease, and love.
Watch the full video episode at Justin Wenck, Ph.D. YouTube Channel!
Check out my best-selling book "Engineered to Love: Going Beyond Success to Fulfillment" also available on Audiobook on all streaming platforms! Go to https://www.engineeredtolove.com/ to learn more!
Got a question or comment about the show? E-mail me at podcast@justinwenck.com.
Remember to subscribe so you don't miss the next episode! Connect with me:
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Disclaimer: No copyright infringement intended, music and pics belong to the rightful owners.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Justin Wenck, Ph.D. (00:03):
Tod ay I'm talking about the challenge of
living life as a human on thisplanet.
Is there ever any respite?
Is there ever any break, apause, just a?
Well, it's vacation time.
You can get back to all of yourchallenges of being on this
earth, doing your human thingson the second Tuesday after this
(00:26):
week.
Is there any of that?
Or is it just never endinguntil one day, as Shakespeare
and Hamlet like to say, weshuffle off this mortal coil?
I was even talking to a friendjust earlier today and she was
asking the same thing of like oh, can I ever just get a break,
(00:47):
get a pause, just in all thiscraziness that I'd just have to
live?
And I sometimes wonder thatmyself.
And it's so interestingsometimes when we hear our own
thoughts reflected back bysomebody else.
It really allowed me to go likewell, boy, she's choosing all
(01:08):
this quote unquote crazinessthat happens to her.
I'm able to see it from myperspective, yet she can't.
And then I'm wondering well,can I see it from my perspective
?
So we're going to dive intothat, but first a little fun.
That's also very much relatedto this topic.
Do you know what one of themovies I've seen the most in my
entire life is?
(01:29):
No, it's.
I don't know.
I thought you might go.
Oh, of course it's going to bethis one, justin, I don't know
what somebody would think it'slike my most go-to movie that
you think that I have seen.
Yet I have two movies that Isaw, a lot of that were very out
of character, considering I wasvery, very boring throughout
(01:53):
high school.
It's two of my favorite movies.
I had other favorite movies,but they were probably most out
of character.
You'd be like what the fuck isthis guy into that movie?
One, dave Chappelle's I believe, was 1997, half baked, which
had based on the whole theme wasthey just smoke weed and one of
their friends goes to getmunchies and gets arrested and
(02:18):
put in jail for killing a horse,not violently but by
overfeeding him too manymunchies.
He's just like oh, you're sucha beautiful horse, oh, do you
want some?
Do you want some funyons?
Oh, oh yeah, I love butteredstuff.
His name is Buttercup, butterednuts, Buttercup.
Anyway, as a favorite movie,dave Chappelle classic, I never
(02:44):
I didn't smoke weed.
I never smoked weed in highschool, never, ever.
But I really love that.
Then the other movie is 1998'sFear and Loathing in Las Vegas
about Hunter S Thompson,directed by Terry Gilliam,
benicio Del Toro and starring asHunter S Thompson.
What's the guy's name?
(03:06):
Man, I know the guy's name.
He's a famous guy, the AmberHeard's boyfriend.
See, sometimes I do that whereit's like I remember sporty
spices.
No, not sporty spice, poshspices, husband.
They had to play soccer.
Ah, beckham, yeah, it's alwayseasier to remember posh spice as
the spice girls was a lot offun, also in that late 90s era.
(03:29):
Yet, man, what is the guy'sname?
He's in all sorts of movies Dragme to hell.
The pirates of the CaribbeanBoy.
See, this is why I just shouldnot be doing things about movies
and whatnot.
And that, oh, johnny Depp.
Yeah, johnny Depp plays thelead character and the movie
(03:53):
starts with a quote that is verymuch related to this can you
get a break?
Can you get a break in life, ordo the challenges just keep on
coming?
Because this quote attributedto Dr Johnson who I just looked
up before doing this, was awriter in, I think, the late
1700s, early 1800s.
The quote attributed to SamuelJohnson is he who makes a beast
(04:18):
of himself gets rid of the painof being a man.
And, due to the era, mandoesn't just mean penis havers,
this is human, all humans, evenwomans, and not just man-mans
but womans and all humans.
But just the pain of being ahuman, just the struggle, the
(04:43):
stress, the trying to overcomeour base urges of just wanting
to eat and fuck and sleep andjust be safe and kill anything
that threatens us, and just arewe destined to have fear, worry
and all this other horriblestuff.
And in this quote that startsout this fear and loathing in
(05:06):
Las Vegas, which I'm gonna reada quote to you which if you
haven't seen it, haven't heardof it, don't know nothing about
it.
It's late 60s, early 70s, allabout drug counterculture and
basically how it's kind ofpromised a way out but really
there was no way out.
And one of my favorite lines ishe starts talking about what's
(05:32):
in the car.
Right, is there on their wayout to Las Vegas from Los
Angeles to do something.
And they open up and they showwhat's in the trunk of their car
and Raoul Duke, who is like theavatar or something of Hunter S
Thompson played by.
Again I found my man, thepirates of the Caribbean.
(05:55):
Yo, whoa, whoa, that guy hegoes.
We had two bags of grass, 75pellets of mescaline, five
sheets of high-powered botter,acid salt shaker, half full of
cocaine, whole galaxy ofmulticolored uppers, downers,
screamers, laughers.
Also a quart of tequila, quartof rum, case of beer, pint of
raw ether and two dozen Amels.
Now that we needed all that forthe trip.
(06:17):
But once you got locked into aserious drug collection, tensey
is to push it as far as you can.
The only thing that reallyworried me was the ether.
There's nothing in the worldmore helpless and irresponsible
and depraved than a man in thedepths of an ether binge.
And I knew we'd get into thatrotten stuff pretty soon.
(06:38):
But really, it's just, it's atrunk full of ways to become a
beast, to get rid of the pain ofbeing a human being, right?
And so is that really an escapefrom that pain?
Because I think I often thoughtof like, hey, this is the way
to take the break, right?
You know you just somethingjust take a pause, just get out,
(07:02):
just take a break, and it canjust go away.
And there's just like the drugculture.
I think our entertainmentculture, our distraction culture
, has sent us down this falseroad of that.
Yeah, you know, in a little bit, in the future, things are
gonna be better.
So you just bide your time,chill out, take a break, go on a
(07:25):
little ride, don't be here,come back later, everything's
gonna be fine, everything'sgonna be better.
Yeah, really, it doesn't workthat way.
All it really is doing is it'spostponing the inevitable, the
return to being here, to being ahuman, having this experience
and working through whateverthat pain is and ultimately
(07:47):
trying to realize that that painthat you feel is coming from
out there.
It's not coming from out there,it's internally created.
That was the big aha I had.
When my friend said I justwanna pause, I just wanna break.
I was like, oh fuck, I've oftenbeen like I just wanna break, I
just wanna pause.
Just working for the weekend, orwait until five o'clock, take a
(08:08):
little break and then nextweek's gonna be better, next
week's gonna be better.
That's when they're gonnarelease the financial info,
that's when they're gonna talkabout the raise, that's when
they're gonna talk about theplumb assignment for work,
that's when the fun events gonnabe coming up.
That's when vacation is, that'swhen the next thing, the next
thing, the next thing and thething is the thing comes, and
(08:31):
it's always just a littledisappointing a little bit.
Not what you expected, notquite the answer, because the
answer really is not out there.
The answer is as it always hasbeen, is and always will be.
The answer is within.
The break comes when you realizethat all of this bullshit has
(08:53):
been put upon you by none otherthan and you're not going to say
, in fact, my friend.
She said I can't believe this.
It would just be too awful, toohorrible to put this on other
people that have it worse than I.
What you are proposing, whichall the great enlightened ones,
(09:15):
and all the ones that truly domaster and are not looking for a
break from anything.
They are riding the wave inflow, in control, being masters
of their destination, whilebeing in flow with what is
presented to them.
And this fact is the fact thatit's all your own creation and
(09:41):
you're like what is that?
Does that even make any sense?
It really is, because let mestep back a little bit so there
really is nothing that happensto you that is, and there's some
stuff that's going to be harderto argue.
So let's not go to true, true,true, horribles, but let's just
(10:02):
go for typical things thathappen to typical people, for
example, having to negotiatewith somebody when purchasing an
item.
So this past weekend I went to acouple of street fairs.
It was very interesting.
I went to two very differentstreet fairs.
One was a very family friendlyone and the other was basically,
(10:25):
I said, leave the family athome.
But they all sell goods andthings like that where you can
bargain and whatnot, and I havetraditionally not been a fan of
needing to negotiate, bargainall that sort of things, and I
just get up, I get frustrated,I'm like, oh, that person's
going to be upset if I want topay less, whereas other people,
(10:46):
they love the game, they lovethe bargain they're like, yes, I
want to get a bargain, I wantto get the lowest price possible
.
And they know that the otherperson's in the game too.
And it's not personal, it's justall part of how this is done,
and so really, how one comes tothis is all based off of one's
attachment of the meaning on theact itself.
(11:08):
And so anytime we're having asituation where it's like, oh,
when can this be over?
One experience that you may belike, when can this be over?
It could be the heaven ofsomebody else, the exact same
experience.
And so anytime you'reexperiencing something that you
don't like, you don't like itbecause you don't like it, not
(11:32):
because there's necessarilysomething inherently bad about
it, because think of everythingthat's happened to you up to
this point that's allowed you toget to a point where you can
listen to me spout this nonsense, which could be some of the
most wisest things that you'veever heard, or it could just be
completely neutral.
It really is up to you how youtake what I'm saying, but the
(11:52):
point is you're able to listento something that I'm recording,
know where you are and you'reable to get this.
Listen to this.
You have the luxury to listento this podcast right now, which
I do.
Thank you for.
Remember to like, subscribe,tell your friends, rate five
stars.
It really does help out.
Really much appreciated.
You have the luxury of listeningto this and what you think
(12:14):
about it is based off of what doyou want to think about it or
what have you subconsciouslydecided to think about things
similar to what I'm saying now,because there's a good chance
that someone's saying that thereis nothing inherently good or
bad about an experience, but themeaning that we attach to it,
that, oh, that's a horriblething.
(12:36):
Because my friend was going whenI said that all of this
experience that you're dreading.
You're creating this, you'resigning up for each
disappointment, each frustration, each annoyance, each challenge
.
I didn't tell her all of that.
I've told her that before, butshe knew that's where I was
(12:56):
going, so I really didn't haveto.
I just had to allude to that.
Hey, you're the creator of yourworld, and it's not in this
like super, but it really ismore in how we attach the
meaning to it is what createshow we feel about it.
For example, if you're in linewaiting to check out and you're
(13:23):
behind somebody that all of asudden they have a big issue,
they're like, oh, I'm fine.
Speaker 2 (13:28):
It's coupon Tuesday and I have double coupons and I
would like to use well, I knowthat I've got the bounty coupon,
but the brawny is the thickerpicker upper, but I still feel a
paper towel is a paper towel.
Justin Wenck, Ph.D. (13:45):
And they just start getting into it and
it's really weird that theperson's talking like that,
because it's a 26-year-oldbodybuilding type person that
looks like a young the rock toWayne Johnson.
It's just you're confused atfirst, like why do they?
Speaker 2 (14:01):
sound like that when they're yoked and they've got
muscles rippling all out ofthere.
I've got to get to the gym withmy brownie thicker picker upper
so that I can go bench 285pounds a few times as I'm going
for a personal record, so itgets really weird.
Justin Wenck, Ph.D. (14:19):
But despite you could get frustrated or you
could go hey, this has takenlonger, let me notice what's
going on.
Let me look at what's happeningand maybe you notice that, oh,
the candy, there's differentcandy.
Oh, the seasons are changing,halloween's coming up, whatever
(14:41):
it is.
Or you can get frustrated andangry and just be in a puff and
have your blood pressure go up.
The choice is yours.
When you become conscious of it.
When you become conscious of it.
If you're not conscious, thenyour subconscious hijacks you
and takes you along, whateverride you've been.
So if you're someone like methat grew up with seeing the
(15:03):
reaction that things aresupposed to go a certain way and
if not, we get angry,frustrated, mad about that,
that's what I took on and I'vebeen working, getting better and
better at going to this.
Well, let's take some breaths,let's see what the other
perspective is, and so I'mreally really good at having
other perspectives.
Why I'm such a powerful,amazing, phenomenal coach and
(15:25):
why I get the results I get asquickly and as amazingly as I do
, is because I've had toovercome so many of these
pre-programmed, indoctrinated.
There is only one way type ofperspectives, and to get out of
that has required me to seemultiple other perspectives of
my life that I'm also able touse for other people's lives,
which was also a necessary skillto deal with people that
(15:46):
thought things had to be acertain way.
I had to be able to see whatthey see so that I could ensure
that they will only end upseeing something that won't get
them angry at me and that mightmake sense or it might not make
sense, but it's starting to makea lot more sense and be easy to
see.
That you, by the way you seethings and there's always
another way to see things cansee things in a way that is of
(16:06):
more benefit to you when you areaware and you are conscious of
it.
And going back to this quote ofhe who makes a beast of himself
gets rid of the pain of being aman, gets rid of that ability
to be conscious and aware ofwhat is going on and being able
to make that choice of how wouldthey like it to be.
(16:27):
It's always amazing how easy itis for people to know what they
don't want.
But if I go, how would you likeit to be?
It's shit, shit, this is shit,it's shit.
It's like, yeah, sure, whatwould you rather have.
(16:49):
And they can't even say likeI'd rather be standing on carpet
or tile or wood floor or sandybeach, all it's just shit, shit,
shit, shit, shit, shit.
And you can get when that's all.
You see, you're just like afuck it, I want out.
I just want to like can we justpretend this isn't shit, like
(17:09):
maybe that can just not smellshit for three minutes.
Let's put a little perfume andIt'll be okay.
But it's really not okay.
You're just.
You're just not able to tellyou're you're standing in shit
anymore.
You know, maybe, maybe you'reyou're like, tell me about the
fucking golf shoes and you getsome golf shoes and so you're
not sliding.
But Do you really want golfshoes so that you don't slip in
(17:33):
the shit that you just keepfocusing on?
And because you focus on that,that's what you keep getting
more of.
Or you want to go like you knowwhat I could go for?
Some like Nice vulcanizedrubber, like matting, like they
got at the gym, you know.
So it's like it's springy, it'sgrippy, it's like it's gonna be
really hard for me to fall.
I can like run, I can jump andif I do fall it's not gonna hurt
(17:56):
me and I can spring back and Ican do stuff.
I'm gonna be like a fuckingsuperhero, like Dwayne the rock
Johnson and I've got my bounty.
Speaker 2 (18:03):
The thicker picker uppercase is Phenomenal and I'm
the biggest superhero in theworld.
Justin Wenck, Ph.D. (18:11):
And I realized I think I totally did a
different voice for my mock,dwayne the rock Johnson, and
that's, that's unfortunate.
I'm not a professional voiceactor, although I would love to
be.
So if you have any Possiblejobs I would, I would love to.
You know, do the dabble I feellike I could do.
You know a Pixar movie?
For sure I do.
I do voices, I do really.
(18:33):
I have like a fun squirrel onethat's.
Sometimes I mess around withthat one, which is really cool.
But you know you can createwhatever you want, however you
want it, if you're aware of whatyou want and that what's
happening is not what you want.
It's.
It's complicated, but it'sactually really, really simple.
(18:53):
A lot of times we think thelife is very complicated and
it's actually very, very, verysimple.
Simple does not mean easy.
Simple does not mean that it'sstraightforward to do
Consistently without someassistance or without some
effort.
It doesn't mean that it has tobe hard and it doesn't mean that
you have to be perfect all thetime.
So it's not one of these things.
(19:15):
I'm not saying that, hey, man,if you're gonna, like you know,
go like smoke a pack ofcigarettes and and drink, drink
some booze or whatever, or gowatch Netflix and chill.
That that's that.
You're fucking up, you're doingit wrong.
You're You're not taking yourresponsibility.
It's not what I'm saying at all.
I'm just saying Be clear aboutwhat it is that you're.
(19:39):
You're taking a time out andyou're You're not getting rid of
any of the pain of yourexistence.
It's there, you're just puttingit on pause.
You're just utilizing the timethat you could actually be using
it to solve it, and by solvingit, I mean changing that
perspective and having thatawareness that, oh, this is
(20:03):
happening because I'm allowingin this to choose this in Some,
in some way and you know this isgoing back to one of the chief
complaints that my friend waswas having was, like you know,
somebody in an impoverishednation eating like shoe leather
for dinner.
Like you can't say that they'rechoosing, that you can't
(20:26):
Bullshit.
I can say that Now, again, theymight not be, they might not
have.
There's a lot that maybe theydidn't choose.
But at some point we each getto a point where we start being
able to make conscious choices,having awareness and having
autonomy and sovereignty.
And there's always people thatexercise that and change their
(20:51):
circumstances in dramatic ways.
And again, I'm not saying thatit's easy.
I'm not saying that we shoulduse that as an excuse to allow
society, culture or whatever tojust do shitty things to people
because it's their choice, it'stheir fault, it's like no, no,
no, we can do both.
We can structure a society, aculture, a politics, if you will
(21:17):
, that it intends to allowpeople the greatest possibility
to transcend the struggles ofsort of you know, we all have
our animal nature right, so thatwe should have that.
Yet also be aware that you know, sometimes people go and do
what they want to do, andsometimes people want to just go
(21:40):
fuck it.
I just want to make baddecisions, and we allow that.
And so we can have both things.
It doesn't have to be one orthe other, it can be both things
can be true, we can have twosimultaneous things.
There's, you know, what shouldbe done at the macro scale, and
then there's what's on theindividual level, and at the
(22:00):
individual level and in someways it doesn't really even that
nobody else matters in yourlife except you, and what you
choose dictates what happens toanything and everything that
comes into your existence.
If you have nothing but angrypeople, you're somehow having
(22:20):
allowing angry people into yourlife and you can choose to
modify that.
These chances are if you justcome up with everybody, no
matter how they come at you,with like love and things like
that, again, don't be an idiot.
You know, don't be a fuckingidiot.
And just like somebody's comingat you with a, with a gun or a
(22:43):
weapon or something, and likeI'm going to hug you, like, or
you run, run away or punch themand then you know, call it, you
know, get, get some help for theperson.
Whatever, you know, there'sskillful ways to be loving.
So yeah, I'm not saying it'seasy, yet it gives you something
(23:08):
called a chance when yourecognize that you're
responsible and you might not beable to change everything about
your life overnight, but youcan always change your
perspective in an instant and goboy, what was my part in this?
How did I view this?
How did I respond and how couldI be a little bit more skillful
(23:29):
, especially based off of howwould you like things to go?
Because I look and I'm like man,there's some difficult people.
What kind of people do I want?
Oh, I want people are likereally easy going, like people
are.
It's like we just, we just wantto help and support each other.
And then I look like oh well,who am I putting the effort into
(23:51):
?
Oh well, the super easy goingpeople I don't put much effort
into, but the people who arepains in my ass.
I argue, or I try to convince,or I try to change or try to get
them to do this or that and theother thing, and then like, why
am I surprised that I havedifficult people in my life when
that's where I'm putting all myenergy?
So again, it's really.
You know, it's simple.
(24:12):
Yet simple does not mean easy,and it gets a lot easier when
you bring other people in tohelp to offer that perspective,
to offer that support, to helpaugment that.
And there's lots of people outthere, and so you know, I know
I'm phenomenal at what I do, butthere's also lots of other
great people.
(24:33):
And the thing that's, I think,the most important is time.
Time is the most importantthing, because that's the when
you make a beast of yourselfjust to get rid of the pain of
being alive, you've just, you'vejust wasted that time.
And if you're, if you're awarethat, hey, I'm having a good
(24:56):
time and you had a good time, begrateful for it and enjoy it.
But if you thought that wasactually going to solve your
problem, you're probably goingto keep running up to the issue
that you disappointed and you'refrustrated and then maybe get
down on yourself that oh, Ifucked up again and that's not
helping anything.
It just perpetuates that cycle.
(25:17):
So it's all about getting outof that step and out of that,
seeing things for what theyreally are and then going okay,
that's how they are, how, that'show it is, how do I want it to
be?
What's what do you want to puton that canvas?
Cause there's a number ofreally famous, beautiful
paintings where they're able tothen do like I don't know.
They do like X-ray or somethingwhere, where you know, they
(25:39):
look below and underneath.
You know this multimilliondollar work of art masterpiece.
There was another master, youknow another piece of art that
was there.
It was, you know, pretty damngood, but the artist was like I
want something better.
I want something better forthis work of art.
Your life is like a work of art,as horrible, as bland or as
(26:03):
fantastic it is, and you are theartist.
What do you want to put on thatcanvas?
That is your life and you canalways step away, but your inks,
your paints, your whatever.
They're out there and they gota limited shelf life, and if
you're not painting with them,they're just there.
(26:24):
They don't care.
You don't know how much timeyou got to paint with, but at
some point the paint's going todry up and your work of art will
be done, and whatever you'veleft is what you will have left.
So my question to you is what isit that you want to draw?
What is it that you want tocreate?
Let me know.
Podcast at JustinWinkcomJustinWinkPhD.
(26:44):
On TikTok, instagram, facebook,linkedin.
Come find me.
Let me know what is it you wantto create and what's been
holding you back.
Why haven't you created it?
Why not?
Are you just taking breaks,waiting for somebody else to do
it?
They're not coming.
There's no help.
There is, but you got to be theinitiator.
(27:08):
When you say I'm ready, thehelp is.
There.
Plenty of people out here tohelp, because the thing is is
that all of those of us thathave gotten someplace that we
weren't before, we got lots ofhelp, and we know that the way
the world works is the more yougive, the more you get.
But you got to allow for theflow.
You got to allow for the givingand the getting, the giving and
(27:30):
the getting, giving and thegetting.
So with that, thank you forindulging me on a little trip
back to memory lane of Justin'sfavorite high school drug movies
, when he didn't even do drugsin high school at all because he
was so afraid of doing anythingwrong.
And yeah, with that I thank youand good day.
Tod ay I'm talking about the challenge of
living life as a human on thisplanet.
Is there ever any respite?
Is there ever any break, apause, just a?
Well, it's vacation time.
You can get back to all of yourchallenges of being on this
earth, doing your human thingson the second Tuesday after this
(00:26):
week.
Is there any of that?
Or is it just never endinguntil one day, as Shakespeare
and Hamlet like to say, weshuffle off this mortal coil?
I was even talking to a friendjust earlier today and she was
asking the same thing of like oh, can I ever just get a break,
(00:47):
get a pause, just in all thiscraziness that I'd just have to
live?
And I sometimes wonder thatmyself.
And it's so interestingsometimes when we hear our own
thoughts reflected back bysomebody else.
It really allowed me to go likewell, boy, she's choosing all
(01:08):
this quote unquote crazinessthat happens to her.
I'm able to see it from myperspective, yet she can't.
And then I'm wondering well,can I see it from my perspective
?
So we're going to dive intothat, but first a little fun.
That's also very much relatedto this topic.
Do you know what one of themovies I've seen the most in my
entire life is?
(01:29):
No, it's.
I don't know.
I thought you might go.
Oh, of course it's going to bethis one, justin, I don't know
what somebody would think it'slike my most go-to movie that
you think that I have seen.
Yet I have two movies that Isaw, a lot of that were very out
of character, considering I wasvery, very boring throughout
(01:53):
high school.
It's two of my favorite movies.
I had other favorite movies,but they were probably most out
of character.
You'd be like what the fuck isthis guy into that movie?
One, dave Chappelle's I believe, was 1997, half baked, which
had based on the whole theme wasthey just smoke weed and one of
their friends goes to getmunchies and gets arrested and
(02:18):
put in jail for killing a horse,not violently but by
overfeeding him too manymunchies.
He's just like oh, you're sucha beautiful horse, oh, do you
want some?
Do you want some funyons?
Oh, oh yeah, I love butteredstuff.
His name is Buttercup, butterednuts, Buttercup.
Anyway, as a favorite movie,dave Chappelle classic, I never
(02:44):
I didn't smoke weed.
I never smoked weed in highschool, never, ever.
But I really love that.
Then the other movie is 1998'sFear and Loathing in Las Vegas
about Hunter S Thompson,directed by Terry Gilliam,
benicio Del Toro and starring asHunter S Thompson.
What's the guy's name?
(03:06):
Man, I know the guy's name.
He's a famous guy, the AmberHeard's boyfriend.
See, sometimes I do that whereit's like I remember sporty
spices.
No, not sporty spice, poshspices, husband.
They had to play soccer.
Ah, beckham, yeah, it's alwayseasier to remember posh spice as
the spice girls was a lot offun, also in that late 90s era.
(03:29):
Yet, man, what is the guy'sname?
He's in all sorts of movies Dragme to hell.
The pirates of the CaribbeanBoy.
See, this is why I just shouldnot be doing things about movies
and whatnot.
And that, oh, johnny Depp.
Yeah, johnny Depp plays thelead character and the movie
(03:53):
starts with a quote that is verymuch related to this can you
get a break?
Can you get a break in life, ordo the challenges just keep on
coming?
Because this quote attributedto Dr Johnson who I just looked
up before doing this, was awriter in, I think, the late
1700s, early 1800s.
The quote attributed to SamuelJohnson is he who makes a beast
(04:18):
of himself gets rid of the painof being a man.
And, due to the era, mandoesn't just mean penis havers,
this is human, all humans, evenwomans, and not just man-mans
but womans and all humans.
But just the pain of being ahuman, just the struggle, the
(04:43):
stress, the trying to overcomeour base urges of just wanting
to eat and fuck and sleep andjust be safe and kill anything
that threatens us, and just arewe destined to have fear, worry
and all this other horriblestuff.
And in this quote that startsout this fear and loathing in
(05:06):
Las Vegas, which I'm gonna reada quote to you which if you
haven't seen it, haven't heardof it, don't know nothing about
it.
It's late 60s, early 70s, allabout drug counterculture and
basically how it's kind ofpromised a way out but really
there was no way out.
And one of my favorite lines ishe starts talking about what's
(05:32):
in the car.
Right, is there on their wayout to Las Vegas from Los
Angeles to do something.
And they open up and they showwhat's in the trunk of their car
and Raoul Duke, who is like theavatar or something of Hunter S
Thompson played by.
Again I found my man, thepirates of the Caribbean.
(05:55):
Yo, whoa, whoa, that guy hegoes.
We had two bags of grass, 75pellets of mescaline, five
sheets of high-powered botter,acid salt shaker, half full of
cocaine, whole galaxy ofmulticolored uppers, downers,
screamers, laughers.
Also a quart of tequila, quartof rum, case of beer, pint of
raw ether and two dozen Amels.
Now that we needed all that forthe trip.
(06:17):
But once you got locked into aserious drug collection, tensey
is to push it as far as you can.
The only thing that reallyworried me was the ether.
There's nothing in the worldmore helpless and irresponsible
and depraved than a man in thedepths of an ether binge.
And I knew we'd get into thatrotten stuff pretty soon.
(06:38):
But really, it's just, it's atrunk full of ways to become a
beast, to get rid of the pain ofbeing a human being, right?
And so is that really an escapefrom that pain?
Because I think I often thoughtof like, hey, this is the way
to take the break, right?
You know you just somethingjust take a pause, just get out,
(07:02):
just take a break, and it canjust go away.
And there's just like the drugculture.
I think our entertainmentculture, our distraction culture
, has sent us down this falseroad of that.
Yeah, you know, in a little bit, in the future, things are
gonna be better.
So you just bide your time,chill out, take a break, go on a
(07:25):
little ride, don't be here,come back later, everything's
gonna be fine, everything'sgonna be better.
Yeah, really, it doesn't workthat way.
All it really is doing is it'spostponing the inevitable, the
return to being here, to being ahuman, having this experience
and working through whateverthat pain is and ultimately
(07:47):
trying to realize that that painthat you feel is coming from
out there.
It's not coming from out there,it's internally created.
That was the big aha I had.
When my friend said I justwanna pause, I just wanna break.
I was like, oh fuck, I've oftenbeen like I just wanna break, I
just wanna pause.
Just working for the weekend, orwait until five o'clock, take a
(08:08):
little break and then nextweek's gonna be better, next
week's gonna be better.
That's when they're gonnarelease the financial info,
that's when they're gonna talkabout the raise, that's when
they're gonna talk about theplumb assignment for work,
that's when the fun events gonnabe coming up.
That's when vacation is, that'swhen the next thing, the next
thing, the next thing and thething is the thing comes, and
(08:31):
it's always just a littledisappointing a little bit.
Not what you expected, notquite the answer, because the
answer really is not out there.
The answer is as it always hasbeen, is and always will be.
The answer is within.
The break comes when you realizethat all of this bullshit has
(08:53):
been put upon you by none otherthan and you're not going to say
, in fact, my friend.
She said I can't believe this.
It would just be too awful, toohorrible to put this on other
people that have it worse than I.
What you are proposing, whichall the great enlightened ones,
(09:15):
and all the ones that truly domaster and are not looking for a
break from anything.
They are riding the wave inflow, in control, being masters
of their destination, whilebeing in flow with what is
presented to them.
And this fact is the fact thatit's all your own creation and
(09:41):
you're like what is that?
Does that even make any sense?
It really is, because let mestep back a little bit so there
really is nothing that happensto you that is, and there's some
stuff that's going to be harderto argue.
So let's not go to true, true,true, horribles, but let's just
(10:02):
go for typical things thathappen to typical people, for
example, having to negotiatewith somebody when purchasing an
item.
So this past weekend I went to acouple of street fairs.
It was very interesting.
I went to two very differentstreet fairs.
One was a very family friendlyone and the other was basically,
(10:25):
I said, leave the family athome.
But they all sell goods andthings like that where you can
bargain and whatnot, and I havetraditionally not been a fan of
needing to negotiate, bargainall that sort of things, and I
just get up, I get frustrated,I'm like, oh, that person's
going to be upset if I want topay less, whereas other people,
(10:46):
they love the game, they lovethe bargain they're like, yes, I
want to get a bargain, I wantto get the lowest price possible
.
And they know that the otherperson's in the game too.
And it's not personal, it's justall part of how this is done,
and so really, how one comes tothis is all based off of one's
attachment of the meaning on theact itself.
(11:08):
And so anytime we're having asituation where it's like, oh,
when can this be over?
One experience that you may belike, when can this be over?
It could be the heaven ofsomebody else, the exact same
experience.
And so anytime you'reexperiencing something that you
don't like, you don't like itbecause you don't like it, not
(11:32):
because there's necessarilysomething inherently bad about
it, because think of everythingthat's happened to you up to
this point that's allowed you toget to a point where you can
listen to me spout this nonsense, which could be some of the
most wisest things that you'veever heard, or it could just be
completely neutral.
It really is up to you how youtake what I'm saying, but the
(11:52):
point is you're able to listento something that I'm recording,
know where you are and you'reable to get this.
Listen to this.
You have the luxury to listento this podcast right now, which
I do.
Thank you for.
Remember to like, subscribe,tell your friends, rate five
stars.
It really does help out.
Really much appreciated.
You have the luxury of listeningto this and what you think
(12:14):
about it is based off of what doyou want to think about it or
what have you subconsciouslydecided to think about things
similar to what I'm saying now,because there's a good chance
that someone's saying that thereis nothing inherently good or
bad about an experience, but themeaning that we attach to it,
that, oh, that's a horriblething.
(12:36):
Because my friend was going whenI said that all of this
experience that you're dreading.
You're creating this, you'resigning up for each
disappointment, each frustration, each annoyance, each challenge
.
I didn't tell her all of that.
I've told her that before, butshe knew that's where I was
(12:56):
going, so I really didn't haveto.
I just had to allude to that.
Hey, you're the creator of yourworld, and it's not in this
like super, but it really ismore in how we attach the
meaning to it is what createshow we feel about it.
For example, if you're in linewaiting to check out and you're
(13:23):
behind somebody that all of asudden they have a big issue,
they're like, oh, I'm fine.
Speaker 2 (13:28):
It's coupon Tuesday and I have double coupons and I
would like to use well, I knowthat I've got the bounty coupon,
but the brawny is the thickerpicker upper, but I still feel a
paper towel is a paper towel.
Justin Wenck, Ph.D. (13:45):
And they just start getting into it and
it's really weird that theperson's talking like that,
because it's a 26-year-oldbodybuilding type person that
looks like a young the rock toWayne Johnson.
It's just you're confused atfirst, like why do they?
Speaker 2 (14:01):
sound like that when they're yoked and they've got
muscles rippling all out ofthere.
I've got to get to the gym withmy brownie thicker picker upper
so that I can go bench 285pounds a few times as I'm going
for a personal record, so itgets really weird.
Justin Wenck, Ph.D. (14:19):
But despite you could get frustrated or you
could go hey, this has takenlonger, let me notice what's
going on.
Let me look at what's happeningand maybe you notice that, oh,
the candy, there's differentcandy.
Oh, the seasons are changing,halloween's coming up, whatever
(14:41):
it is.
Or you can get frustrated andangry and just be in a puff and
have your blood pressure go up.
The choice is yours.
When you become conscious of it.
When you become conscious of it.
If you're not conscious, thenyour subconscious hijacks you
and takes you along, whateverride you've been.
So if you're someone like methat grew up with seeing the
(15:03):
reaction that things aresupposed to go a certain way and
if not, we get angry,frustrated, mad about that,
that's what I took on and I'vebeen working, getting better and
better at going to this.
Well, let's take some breaths,let's see what the other
perspective is, and so I'mreally really good at having
other perspectives.
Why I'm such a powerful,amazing, phenomenal coach and
(15:25):
why I get the results I get asquickly and as amazingly as I do
, is because I've had toovercome so many of these
pre-programmed, indoctrinated.
There is only one way type ofperspectives, and to get out of
that has required me to seemultiple other perspectives of
my life that I'm also able touse for other people's lives,
which was also a necessary skillto deal with people that
(15:46):
thought things had to be acertain way.
I had to be able to see whatthey see so that I could ensure
that they will only end upseeing something that won't get
them angry at me and that mightmake sense or it might not make
sense, but it's starting to makea lot more sense and be easy to
see.
That you, by the way you seethings and there's always
another way to see things cansee things in a way that is of
(16:06):
more benefit to you when you areaware and you are conscious of
it.
And going back to this quote ofhe who makes a beast of himself
gets rid of the pain of being aman, gets rid of that ability
to be conscious and aware ofwhat is going on and being able
to make that choice of how wouldthey like it to be.
(16:27):
It's always amazing how easy itis for people to know what they
don't want.
But if I go, how would you likeit to be?
It's shit, shit, this is shit,it's shit.
It's like, yeah, sure, whatwould you rather have.
(16:49):
And they can't even say likeI'd rather be standing on carpet
or tile or wood floor or sandybeach, all it's just shit, shit,
shit, shit, shit, shit.
And you can get when that's all.
You see, you're just like afuck it, I want out.
I just want to like can we justpretend this isn't shit, like
(17:09):
maybe that can just not smellshit for three minutes.
Let's put a little perfume andIt'll be okay.
But it's really not okay.
You're just.
You're just not able to tellyou're you're standing in shit
anymore.
You know, maybe, maybe you'reyou're like, tell me about the
fucking golf shoes and you getsome golf shoes and so you're
not sliding.
But Do you really want golfshoes so that you don't slip in
(17:33):
the shit that you just keepfocusing on?
And because you focus on that,that's what you keep getting
more of.
Or you want to go like you knowwhat I could go for?
Some like Nice vulcanizedrubber, like matting, like they
got at the gym, you know.
So it's like it's springy, it'sgrippy, it's like it's gonna be
really hard for me to fall.
I can like run, I can jump andif I do fall it's not gonna hurt
(17:56):
me and I can spring back and Ican do stuff.
I'm gonna be like a fuckingsuperhero, like Dwayne the rock
Johnson and I've got my bounty.
Speaker 2 (18:03):
The thicker picker uppercase is Phenomenal and I'm
the biggest superhero in theworld.
Justin Wenck, Ph.D. (18:11):
And I realized I think I totally did a
different voice for my mock,dwayne the rock Johnson, and
that's, that's unfortunate.
I'm not a professional voiceactor, although I would love to
be.
So if you have any Possiblejobs I would, I would love to.
You know, do the dabble I feellike I could do.
You know a Pixar movie?
For sure I do.
I do voices, I do really.
(18:33):
I have like a fun squirrel onethat's.
Sometimes I mess around withthat one, which is really cool.
But you know you can createwhatever you want, however you
want it, if you're aware of whatyou want and that what's
happening is not what you want.
It's.
It's complicated, but it'sactually really, really simple.
(18:53):
A lot of times we think thelife is very complicated and
it's actually very, very, verysimple.
Simple does not mean easy.
Simple does not mean that it'sstraightforward to do
Consistently without someassistance or without some
effort.
It doesn't mean that it has tobe hard and it doesn't mean that
you have to be perfect all thetime.
So it's not one of these things.
(19:15):
I'm not saying that, hey, man,if you're gonna, like you know,
go like smoke a pack ofcigarettes and and drink, drink
some booze or whatever, or gowatch Netflix and chill.
That that's that.
You're fucking up, you're doingit wrong.
You're You're not taking yourresponsibility.
It's not what I'm saying at all.
I'm just saying Be clear aboutwhat it is that you're.
(19:39):
You're taking a time out andyou're You're not getting rid of
any of the pain of yourexistence.
It's there, you're just puttingit on pause.
You're just utilizing the timethat you could actually be using
it to solve it, and by solvingit, I mean changing that
perspective and having thatawareness that, oh, this is
(20:03):
happening because I'm allowingin this to choose this in Some,
in some way and you know this isgoing back to one of the chief
complaints that my friend waswas having was, like you know,
somebody in an impoverishednation eating like shoe leather
for dinner.
Like you can't say that they'rechoosing, that you can't
(20:26):
Bullshit.
I can say that Now, again, theymight not be, they might not
have.
There's a lot that maybe theydidn't choose.
But at some point we each getto a point where we start being
able to make conscious choices,having awareness and having
autonomy and sovereignty.
And there's always people thatexercise that and change their
(20:51):
circumstances in dramatic ways.
And again, I'm not saying thatit's easy.
I'm not saying that we shoulduse that as an excuse to allow
society, culture or whatever tojust do shitty things to people
because it's their choice, it'stheir fault, it's like no, no,
no, we can do both.
We can structure a society, aculture, a politics, if you will
(21:17):
, that it intends to allowpeople the greatest possibility
to transcend the struggles ofsort of you know, we all have
our animal nature right, so thatwe should have that.
Yet also be aware that you know, sometimes people go and do
what they want to do, andsometimes people want to just go
(21:40):
fuck it.
I just want to make baddecisions, and we allow that.
And so we can have both things.
It doesn't have to be one orthe other, it can be both things
can be true, we can have twosimultaneous things.
There's, you know, what shouldbe done at the macro scale, and
then there's what's on theindividual level, and at the
(22:00):
individual level and in someways it doesn't really even that
nobody else matters in yourlife except you, and what you
choose dictates what happens toanything and everything that
comes into your existence.
If you have nothing but angrypeople, you're somehow having
(22:20):
allowing angry people into yourlife and you can choose to
modify that.
These chances are if you justcome up with everybody, no
matter how they come at you,with like love and things like
that, again, don't be an idiot.
You know, don't be a fuckingidiot.
And just like somebody's comingat you with a, with a gun or a
(22:43):
weapon or something, and likeI'm going to hug you, like, or
you run, run away or punch themand then you know, call it, you
know, get, get some help for theperson.
Whatever, you know, there'sskillful ways to be loving.
So yeah, I'm not saying it'seasy, yet it gives you something
(23:08):
called a chance when yourecognize that you're
responsible and you might not beable to change everything about
your life overnight, but youcan always change your
perspective in an instant and goboy, what was my part in this?
How did I view this?
How did I respond and how couldI be a little bit more skillful
(23:29):
, especially based off of howwould you like things to go?
Because I look and I'm like man,there's some difficult people.
What kind of people do I want?
Oh, I want people are likereally easy going, like people
are.
It's like we just, we just wantto help and support each other.
And then I look like oh well,who am I putting the effort into
(23:51):
?
Oh well, the super easy goingpeople I don't put much effort
into, but the people who arepains in my ass.
I argue, or I try to convince,or I try to change or try to get
them to do this or that and theother thing, and then like, why
am I surprised that I havedifficult people in my life when
that's where I'm putting all myenergy?
So again, it's really.
You know, it's simple.
(24:12):
Yet simple does not mean easy,and it gets a lot easier when
you bring other people in tohelp to offer that perspective,
to offer that support, to helpaugment that.
And there's lots of people outthere, and so you know, I know
I'm phenomenal at what I do, butthere's also lots of other
great people.
(24:33):
And the thing that's, I think,the most important is time.
Time is the most importantthing, because that's the when
you make a beast of yourselfjust to get rid of the pain of
being alive, you've just, you'vejust wasted that time.
And if you're, if you're awarethat, hey, I'm having a good
(24:56):
time and you had a good time, begrateful for it and enjoy it.
But if you thought that wasactually going to solve your
problem, you're probably goingto keep running up to the issue
that you disappointed and you'refrustrated and then maybe get
down on yourself that oh, Ifucked up again and that's not
helping anything.
It just perpetuates that cycle.
(25:17):
So it's all about getting outof that step and out of that,
seeing things for what theyreally are and then going okay,
that's how they are, how, that'show it is, how do I want it to
be?
What's what do you want to puton that canvas?
Cause there's a number ofreally famous, beautiful
paintings where they're able tothen do like I don't know.
They do like X-ray or somethingwhere, where you know, they
(25:39):
look below and underneath.
You know this multimilliondollar work of art masterpiece.
There was another master, youknow another piece of art that
was there.
It was, you know, pretty damngood, but the artist was like I
want something better.
I want something better forthis work of art.
Your life is like a work of art,as horrible, as bland or as
(26:03):
fantastic it is, and you are theartist.
What do you want to put on thatcanvas?
That is your life and you canalways step away, but your inks,
your paints, your whatever.
They're out there and they gota limited shelf life, and if
you're not painting with them,they're just there.
(26:24):
They don't care.
You don't know how much timeyou got to paint with, but at
some point the paint's going todry up and your work of art will
be done, and whatever you'veleft is what you will have left.
So my question to you is what isit that you want to draw?
What is it that you want tocreate?
Let me know.
Podcast at JustinWinkcomJustinWinkPhD.
(26:44):
On TikTok, instagram, facebook,linkedin.
Come find me.
Let me know what is it you wantto create and what's been
holding you back.
Why haven't you created it?
Why not?
Are you just taking breaks,waiting for somebody else to do
it?
They're not coming.
There's no help.
There is, but you got to be theinitiator.
(27:08):
When you say I'm ready, thehelp is.
There.
Plenty of people out here tohelp, because the thing is is
that all of those of us thathave gotten someplace that we
weren't before, we got lots ofhelp, and we know that the way
the world works is the more yougive, the more you get.
But you got to allow for theflow.
You got to allow for the givingand the getting, the giving and
(27:30):
the getting, giving and thegetting.
So with that, thank you forindulging me on a little trip
back to memory lane of Justin'sfavorite high school drug movies
, when he didn't even do drugsin high school at all because he
was so afraid of doing anythingwrong.
And yeah, with that I thank youand good day.
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