The Good, The Bad, and The Whatever! EP56

The Good, A mall Santa who is deaf and helps kids communicate with ASL. The Bad, women attack police with bees. The Whatever, two-year head gets their head suck in a toilet seat.

Episode Transcript

Brian (00:04):
Hey, welcome back everyone to another episode of The Good,
the Bad, and the whatever.
We have Brandon, Kendall, andmyself, Brian here, ready for another
wonderful episode where we're gonnashare stories that none of us.
Thought of or wrote,but somebody else did.
And we'll share 'em with you.
But Kendall, you wanna tell'em how they can find us?
Track us down.

Kendle (00:23):
Yeah, so you can find us on Instagram at goodbye.
Whatever pod all over case.
All one word.
You can find us on Twitter at gvw podon Facebook and our Podbean website.
That's right.

Brian (00:35):
That's right.

Brandon (00:36):
Get all the info.
That's

Brian (00:37):
right.
, . Stay current on the latest, craziest

Kendle (00:39):
stuff.
And if you have your own crazy story,dmma to us on any of those platforms.
Yeah, because we'll, You knowme credit rolling in 10 minutes
before the show . That's right.
I'm finding a

Brandon (00:50):
story.
I may or may not gotten all my storiesdriving between Mooresville and

Kendle (00:54):
here . What's their driving?

Brian (00:57):
Nope, that

Brandon (00:58):
is a bit of a drive.
And I copied and pasted it to my text,so I . I'm quite the talented person.
you know, you're not

Brian (01:05):
supposed to text and drive.
I

Brandon (01:06):
didn't text.
Oh, you didn't send it?
Yes, I just put it in the . There you go.
Didn't say anything aboutreading the news and driving.

Brian (01:12):
Yeah.
Is text a noun or a verb?
texting

Music (01:18):
instead.

Brian (01:20):
All right, so we got three new stories today, Kendall.
You've got the good, right?
Yeah.

Kendle (01:25):
So.
At the time we're recording this,it's like just after Christmas,
but we record a little early.
So it'll kind of be late when youhear about it, but I thought it was
neat when I was reading it . So, thereis this one Santa who uses ASL to
connect with children who are deaf.
and I read the headline and Iwas truly just like, mind blown.
I was like, I've nevereven thought about it.

(01:46):
Like little kids whocan't, like deaf kids.
How do they tell Santa what they want?
And so, Charles Graves is the Santahe would've loved to meet as a kid.
He is deaf.
And like as a child he couldalways like communicate.
, obviously, you know, you cancommunicate with hearing people,
but like hearing people don'tcommunicate as well with deaf people.
And so now he's a 52 year old fromTexas and he's one of just a few

(02:09):
professional deaf Santas in the UnitedStates and has been spreading, spending
the winter going to malls, parades,and events to meet kids and chat with
them through American Sign Language.
During a recent event, During a recentvisit to Marilyn Graves met with several
kids who were deaf, including KevinWoodward, who asked Santa for a dirt bike.
And his mom, who was also deaf,said it was beautiful to see
her son interacting with Graves.

(02:30):
This is exactly what it's supposed to be.
To see him laugh and make thoseexpressions with Santa was the best.
And at that point I was crying , andI was like, this is so sweet.
It is actually,

Brandon (02:42):
yeah.
Brian just shut up with a spreadsheet.

Kendle (02:45):
Yeah, , right.
I like this and

Brian (02:47):
this.
That's exactly what I would've done.

Kendle (02:49):
But also I didn't realize, I just never thought about there being like a
professional network of traveling Santas.
I just kinda assumed it was likea local guy who had a beard and
they would just put him on a seat.
I didn't

Brandon (03:02):
know that you actually have to register to be a Santa like.
there's like a list or like a

Brian (03:08):
registry.
Yeah.
I had no idea.
So you'd be, I mean, I mean we've never

Kendle (03:12):
thought of this.
Bought a fantasy offline andLauren's dad did it for us.
. Brian: Well, but like anytime you do like volunteering that involves children.
Like if obviously schools youwould already have known that.
But like, I don't think aboutthat too much, but like, you
get background checked, you getsome, I mean, It's a good call.
Yeah, I mean, just think about itlike the parents are walking up
and putting their kid in your lap.

(03:32):
Right?
Right.
I mean, so you kind of gottacheck out as good to go.
Yeah.
That'd be a little bit weird if that youhad a problem and that's what you became.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So I never thought about itmyself, but that makes sense.
Yeah.
I knew

Brandon (03:43):
that there was a registration, like a, yeah, I don't know what they
call it, professional Santa registration,

Kendle (03:49):
but Yeah.
Yeah.
But I guess like there.
I mean it, I'm sure he gets paid cuzif he's from Texas and he had to go to
Maryland for an event, surely, I'm sure.
Yeah.
And I mean that's something ofthat super specialized too, right?
Like you would need to know like ourSanta is deaf, here's an event for Tef.
Kids like that feels like somethingyou would make a living at.

(04:10):
Yes.
But I've truly, I never thought about ituntil I read this article and was crying
about two, two deaf kids dirt bikes.
Yeah.

Brandon (04:18):
Why are there two Santas

Music (04:23):
How do I pick right
? Kendle: But yeah, I was sobbing reading this one.
I was like,

Brandon (04:29):
read this way.
I, it's funny as I kind of was skimming.
You know, this what I was driving.
, I saw als and for some reason whatran through my mind when I saw
ALS was the like when they weredoing the ice bucket challenge.
Yeah.
Whatever that is.
Yeah.
Oh yeah,

Kendle (04:44):
that's what it was.
I was like, that was a l s This is a s l.

Brandon (04:47):
Yeah.
So that's where I got confusion.
I was like, How would those two think?
Nat next?
. Brian: It's all too confusing.
I don't understand.
If I can't understandit, I can't explain it.
Yeah.
. Brandon: Yes.
This is all confusing.
. Brian: So where, when do they pour the bucket of ice water on 'em?
Yeah.
Santa does the ice bucket challenge.
I don't get it.

Music (05:05):
and then

Kendle (05:05):
they get a dirt bike.

Music (05:06):
What happens
? Brian: It's a win-win.
Yeah.
Yes.
Wow, that's pretty good.

Kendle (05:12):
It was just sweet.
It was like, whoa,
. Brian: Now that is, that kinda reminds me about the one where the.
The running one or something?

Brandon (05:18):
Oh yeah.
The marathon.
Oh,

Kendle (05:20):
by Athlon that's still the most impressive thing.
Yeah.
Because like he's dressed asmuch an athlete as the brother
who is the actual athlete.
Competing maybe better.
Because he has to like narrate it.

Brandon (05:30):
Yeah.
Yeah.
I have to do it, narrate it

Brian (05:33):
and yeah.
I can't be out of breath while I'mtelling him what's like, oh, screw it.
I can't say this.
And then the kid walks out, Hey, just use

Kendle (05:39):
your feet,
. Brian: Hold

Brandon (05:41):
on, I'm gonna need a minute.
. I'm outta

Kendle (05:44):
breath.
Yeah.
Still just the most impressive story.

Brandon (05:47):
Yes, there are.
What was there was another onelike that where the guy climbed,
was it Everest or something?
When he had No.

Brian (05:55):
Yeah.
Oh yeah.
You ain't got no legs.
, Jenna, Dan did it.

Brandon (05:59):
I know that for us,

Kendle (06:06):
I got two fully functioning legs.
I'm climbing

Brandon (06:08):
no mountain.
Yeah.
. I'm good.
It looks good from here.
Yeah.

Brian (06:11):
I'm totally gonna take my ability to walk for granted.
Yes.
. Brandon: Yes.
I often find myself sitting down

Kendle (06:17):
a lot.
I got real tired real quickly.

Brian (06:21):
Feet hurt.
. Music: Suck.
Yep.

Brandon (06:27):
All right.
Who's good?

Brian (06:28):
I got the bad.
I got the bad.
This time suck.
I can wait.
All right, you got a minute?
Okay.
So with the bad story I've got, so aMassachusetts woman is accused of using
a swarm of bees as a dangerous weapon.
I like it.
Yep.
It's off to a good start.
So according to the sheriff, she allegedlyunleashed a hive of angry insects on

(06:48):
deputies who were trying to serve aneviction notice to somebody else by the.
At that moment.
So, Robinhood?
Yeah, . So she's apparently, actually itis funny because her, no, it's not Robin.
Ronnie Rory Woods, a 55 year oldprofessional beekeeper, drove up
to the home in Long Meadow wherethe deputies were in the process

(07:09):
of evicting another person.
She's apparently part of a groupthat rallies around to fight
evictions that are unnecessary.
I mean, according to her,

Brandon (07:20):
not paying rent is not a

Brian (07:21):
necessary well , but it said like, how did she know?
She showed up with the bees.
Knocked the lids off and the beescame flying out and the deputies
came rushing over cuz they noticedand they were trying to get the lids
back on before too many bees got out.
And in that effort she kicked overone of the hives off of the truck
that she brought over and it smashedon the ground and bees poured out.

(07:42):
And I guess like, you know, deputieswere getting stung like crazy.
I mean, I read that and I was like, Yeah.
I had a drug her to jail.
Yeah.
The same.
Yeah.
I mean, you're a beekeeper, soyou know what will agitate them
and you know how they'll respond.
So that's a weapon to me.
Yes.

Brandon (07:57):
I right.
I,

Kendle (07:58):
Much worse than poor Beverly and her cat.

Brandon (08:00):
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's just a be honest.
It's just a dick move.

Brian (08:04):
Yeah.
It, well, and like you alsodon't know who's allergic,

Kendle (08:07):
you know?
Right.
Like it's stuff, it'spotentially really dangerous.
Yeah.
What you've done.

Brian (08:11):
And so when I read that, I was at first like, how do you
attack somebody with bees and.
, that's how you do it.
. It's like

Brandon (08:18):
throwing an alligator through a tractor window.
, same
, Brian: except for the alligator's gonna go one at a time.
The bees are gonna get 'em all right

Kendle (08:26):
from every direction.
Freeze
. Brian: And I'm particularly fond of this story because I have a disdain for bees.
I mean, now I love honey bees andyard sales and these are productive.
But I lump wasps, hornets.
They're all bees to me.
Yes.
And I have, nobody has yet toexplain what productive thing
wasps and hornets do in this world.
Sting.

(08:46):
Yeah.
And I know people, oh, willthey kill other insects?
I'll keep the otherinsects to get rid of them.
, same.
Well, which

Brandon (08:50):
ones are we talking about?
Yeah.
Well, yeah, if it's aspider I'm okay with you
. Kendle: I'm okay with the horn hanging around for a bit.

Brian (08:57):
I don't know.
Spiders are easy to squish.

Brandon (09:01):
You know, I will give her this total a-hole move.
But the ingenuity I'm a big fan of, I was.

Brian (09:07):
Yeah.
And the way they described, like the storywas I, that's why I didn't read the whole
thing cuz it's actually pretty lengthy.
But the description of it was likeshe rolled up and they didn't know
what was happening and all of asudden they started seeing her.
Those are hives and they were liftingoff the lids and the bees were gonna
start come pouring out and they camerushing over to try to stop it cuz
they knew what was about to happen.

Kendle (09:25):
Yeah.
This sounds like somethingshe's definitely done

Brian (09:27):
before and she just like kicked one over and the next thing
you know the bees are, you can'tstop the bees from coming out now.
She said Judo kick

Brandon (09:38):
get 'em boys.
Yeah.
That.
. Like I said I don't like the thethe cause, but I'm a big fan of
some I thinking outside the box,
, Brian: Brandon's like, wonder what it would cost to get my beekeeping license.
Yeah.
Marty on

Brian (09:52):
it.
. That might be a way to getmy customers to pay on tone.

Brandon (09:58):
Oh, you didn't think it was worth it, did you?

Brian (10:03):
Just bring a jar.
You're only five days late.
You get the jar, but likewhen you're 60 days late.
Yeah, you get the hive.
You

Brandon (10:08):
get the hive in a mail slot.

Brian (10:16):
Oh, that's

Brandon (10:17):
so wrong.
Yeah, you gotta have a a heavy hivebox so they can't open the door.
, I don't know if you've ever seen the,one of the jackass movies where they
thought they were going to a photoshoot and they had like five of 'em
in the back of a limo and they had thesun riff open and they run over and.
Dump bees into the limoand lock the doors.

Music (10:41):
they

Brandon (10:41):
were free.
I mean, you're stuck in a limo and you'rejust getting the crap stung outta you.
It's like you can't get out.
. Music: Oh, that was the best

Brian (10:50):
that honestly, I would probably dive on.
I would too.
Yeah,

Music (10:53):
I would do.

Brandon (10:54):
And if you haven't seen it, you gotta look it up cuz it was one
of the best things I've ever seen.
It's painful

Brian (10:59):
to even think about.
Yeah.
I don't

Brandon (11:01):
know.
Is it worse to be stung by the beesor be trapped and you can't get

Brian (11:04):
up?
It's trapped knowing that you'renever gonna get stop getting stung.
Yeah, I mean the only, right.

Kendle (11:08):
Like there's no end to this.
Yeah, because like,

Brian (11:10):
and if it's a honey bee, I guess it will die when it stings you.
Yes.
So eventually you'll run out ofbees to sting you If it's not.

Kendle (11:18):
That's a thousand stings.
You gotta get through death by a

Brian (11:21):
thousand stings . That would be the worst for me.
I feel

Kendle (11:24):
like even if you're not allergic, you're allergic to that.
Yeah.

Brandon (11:28):
Yeah.
Then they dump mayonnaise in the Yeah.
Would

Brian (11:31):
everybody ask
Yeah.
That, that, at that point, I wouldjust like that, that, that be tur.
That'd be ground fortaking care of it myself.
. Yeah.

Kendle (11:40):
just.

Brian (11:40):
But yeah, I can't think of anything.
Worse for me is like, I've hadpeople ask me like, are you allergi?
No, I'm actually not.
Yeah.
Unless fear is an allergy,then I am . I reek

Music (11:52):
with fear.
Yeah.

Brian (11:54):
And they know it too.
. They

Brandon (11:55):
can smell it on me.

Brian (11:57):
Like literally if a bee flew in here right now, it would attack me.
not the two of you.
Yeah.
. Brandon: That's funny.
Cause my wife is like a beewill go straight to her.
Oh

Kendle (12:07):
yeah.
We were sitting on our porchone night like two summers ago.
All of a sudden this beat, like I'min one rocking chair and Luke's in the
other rocking chair, we're both likeplaying on our phones and all of a sudden
this beat flies up outta nowhere andgets him right in the eyelid and like,
It was the funniest thingthat had ever happened.
. But his old face, you sick swell

Music (12:27):
like that.
Right?

Kendle (12:28):
like, he didn't even look like him though.
, he got married a bobblehead.
A swell.
. Yeah, . He's never calledout sick from work.
He missed like three

Brian (12:38):
days.

Brandon (12:39):
Yeah.
Would face

Brian (12:40):
swollen.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You, it's hard to operate when you'reused to two eyes and you only get

Kendle (12:45):
one
I mean, it was awful,but it was like 50 50.
That thing was gonna getone of us, and it got him.

Brandon (12:53):
That and you went
. Brian: She goes like this throws the bee at him.
It's like the alligatorswith the dry flick.

Music (13:00):
deflection.

Kendle (13:01):
Yeah.
It is my ninja movie,
. Brian: That's good.
All right.
All right.
You got the whatever story, Brandon.
All right.
Speaking of buzzing asyou get your phone here.
, Kendle: Let's see.
Spell those cameras on it.
Camera

Brian (13:15):
one,

Kendle (13:16):
camera two, . Camera one.
Me and Brandon have vintage iPhonesor Brian have vintage iPhone.
Yeah, I was gonna say.

Brandon (13:22):
All right, so the whatever potty training.
It goes horribly wrong.
Awful.

Kendle (13:28):
Nope.

Brandon (13:29):
So, two no.
Poop . Not a poop story.
. So we do love a poop story.
The the, there's a two year old that theywere trying to potty train and I guess
she decided to take training into herown hands and decided to wear the the
actual top of the potty as a ass hat.
And it got stuck around her head and neck.

(13:52):
Oh no.
So , you have to cut it off.
Well, , so, so it starts with themom freaking out and, well, first
the two year old course freaking outcuz she can't get it off her head.
Right.
Then the mom freaking out becausethe two year old's freaking out
that she can't get it off her head.
So the mom yells out to the 16 year oldsister, I guess, to call the firefighter.

(14:12):
So the firefighters have to comeup and do like an emergency.
Cut off of the toilet.
Yeah.
To get it off her head.
I was like, ah.
I don't know.
Seems like, I would've gotthat off without having to
call the fire department.
Well, and

Brian (14:26):
if it fits getting on it would fit getting off.
Yeah.

Brandon (14:28):
Little vase.
Get that right off.
Yeah.
Soap butter.
Yeah.
Something.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, a dral, I got off with a

Brian (14:35):
Dr.
, so, you know.
Fair

Kendle (14:37):
cut.
A crack thick enough.

Brian (14:39):
It's interesting because like the fire part, fire
department will show up for that.
Like, gotta cut a toiletseat off a kid's head.
Yeah.
But they can't they're no longer goingto get cats outta trees and stuff.
Yeah.

Brandon (14:48):
Another kid stuck in the toilet.

Brian (14:51):
went in head first.
Yeah.
. Brandon: Trying to set the world record, diving off the top of the sink.
Bobbing for apples.
. Brandon: That's a poop story.
Yeah.

Music (15:03):
Oh gosh.
. Brandon: Yeah.
So I mean, when you go.
And you walk in, you'relike, ah, for real.
. You know, every parent's at themoment, it's like, ah, come on,

Brian (15:14):
Listen,

Kendle (15:15):
two year olds

Brian (15:16):
are alive.
There's no way that wecan keep this ingested.
This house is there.
. Music: Yeah.

Kendle (15:20):
Everyone's gonna know.
Yeah.
She's gonna be knownas the toilet seat kid.

Brandon (15:25):
Yep.
The ass hat.
. Brian: That's pretty much what it was.
, Brandon: oh, what do they call it?
The Texas necktie

Music (15:42):
They don't.
They do now.

Kendle (15:43):
That's missed opportunity.

Music (15:47):
I dunno.
Why text ? I know either.

Brandon (15:50):
Seemed like the only state that would wear it.
, Brian: maybe , sorry.
Texas
. Brian: You're just eliminating fewer shit.
Right.
I checked the stats.
We don't got anything in Texas.
Nothing going on in

Brian (16:03):
Texas.
We're good.

Kendle (16:05):
Our seven listeners on

Brandon (16:07):
None are from Texas.

Brian (16:08):
We really need to get more Florida people to send
us their own individual story.
Yes.
Right.

Brandon (16:12):
Real life story.

Brian (16:13):
Yeah.
This happened last week.

Brandon (16:15):
Real man of genius.
. Brian: I used to love those commercials.
, here's to you, Mr.
Taco salad.
Inventor.
If you the only salad that's20,000 calories, , and then
you're in the background.
I don't see no lettuce.
They have a whole series on YouTube, A real man, a genius

(16:38):
where it's just like Red Necky.
Yeah.
Of like making things.
There's one where a guy had 2 2,2 by fours, one in the front, one
in the back of two kayaks, two,two by fours, and then an outboard
motor strapped to the two by fours.
I don't know what couldgo wrong with it, but I.

Kendle (16:57):
I mean, it's kind of like a pontoon.

Brandon (16:58):
Yeah.
I mean, absolutely.
Look

Music (17:00):
happen.
It's not that far off.
Two kayaks,
, Brandon: not even like hard kayaks, like the cheap ones you
buy at like Academy or something.
At the plastic

Brian (17:10):
ones.
Yeah.
Oh geez.

Brandon (17:12):
That's funny.
Rednecky, I

Kendle (17:14):
like it.
It's

Brian (17:15):
cheaper than a real boat . Well, do you want to
tell 'em where they can find us?
Yeah, so send us on if they even want to

Kendle (17:21):
find us anymore.
, do you wanna see anymore in this nonsense?

Brandon (17:25):
We are.
Kendall is adding assets to our story
. Kendle: So, send us your own weird stories.
Add Instagram on, good, bad, whatever.
Pod
, Brandon: Kendall

Kendle (17:36):
just fell off the rails.
I'm having a stroke on Facebook,on Twitter at gbw pod and on pod.
You can

Music (17:44):
figure it out from there.

(18:30):
Something.
Yahoo.