Episode 51: Weirdly Broken Sports Statues

Fan Mail Goes Here!!

Christine and Sarah are back with another engaging episode of 'The Mental Funny Bone,' where they blend mental wellness with laughter. This week, they dive into distinguished fan mail, recount hilarious Botox adventures, and explore their latest habit hurdles. The heart of the episode uncovers the fascinating process of choosing a new Pope following the recent Papal death. They also share personal stories that highlight the power of aligning actions with values, and the transformative journey of translating thoughts into reality. With sharp humor and thoughtful discussion, this episode underscores that navigating life's challenges is easier with a sprinkle of comedy and a good dose of perspective.

How to find mental health help when you're struggling. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists
https://washingtoncountyhumanservices.com/agencies/behavioral-health-developmental-services
https://www.alleghenycounty.us/Services/Human-Services-DHS/Publications/Resource-Guides
Apps - Just search mental health where you get your apps.
EAP programs are a great place to look for help!!

Additional Resources (Sports Related):
https://globalsportmatters.com/health/2020/12/04/mental-health-resources-2/

Episode Transcript

Sarah (00:02):
Welcome to The Mental Funny Bone, a podcast where
mental health meets humor,heart, and a healthy dose of
laughter where we talk about thetough stuff, laugh at the,
awkward stuff, and remind youand ourselves that it's okay to
not be okay.
Settle in, take a breath, andlet's normalize the mess.
One ridiculous story and realconversation at a time.
I'm Sarah,

Chris (00:22):
and I'm Christine, and neither of us are mental health
professionals, but you shouldget yourself to a mental health
professional.
It does make a world ofdifference.
Shoot, I have a mental healthprofessional appointment
tomorrow.
Excellent.

Sarah (00:35):
Oh, fantastic.
And check out, the links in our,show notes and, or if you need
to from your cellular telephonedown.
Nine, eight, eight.
Reach out for help.
people like it when you reachout for help.
If it's not an emergency and youjust wanna chat with us, feel
free to send us an email at Gasyour [e-mail].

Chris (00:53):
We're always happy.
We're always happy to, to takethe feedback.
I got a super excited, got afeedback text today.
Oh, I got some feedback too.
But you go first.
So my friend Elaine sent me atext first.
Bless you.
She sent me a text yesterday tolet me know that the Pope had
passed.

Sarah (01:12):
Yeah.
We can't talk about it yet.
You gotta leave it right thereand then we'll get, Pope has
gotta have its own segment thisweek.
Its own segment.
Got it.
Okay.
We're still in fan mail, so keepgoing.

Chris (01:22):
But then she must have listened to a couple of,
episodes and she's you need anew job.

Sarah (01:27):
Oh,

Chris (01:27):
yeah.
I'm like, just to let you guysknow I'm fine.
I am a whiny cry baby.
In case it wasn't clear, I'm awhiny cry baby.

Sarah (01:36):
No, that's not nice.
That's not what you should bedoing.
You should not be puttingyourself down.
What you should be doing is saythat you're working through it
and doing what you need to do,which would be, find a new job
or just finish the project youwere working on.
So that's cool.

Chris (01:49):
great project over.
I don't know, Sarah, if you'venoticed any difference between
last week and this week, butYeah, if that whole thing

Sarah (01:56):
happens again, we're

Chris (01:57):
gonna break up.
You can't break up with me.
We're blood.
I could, right?
You can't.
you can't.
I feel like I can.
you can just, you'll be shittyto me.
I can totally picture it like,like this aura of disappointment
about you.

Sarah (02:12):
It'll be fantastic.
So much better than actuallybreaking up.

Chris (02:15):
Just bring me around and be like,

Sarah (02:17):
can't even, I can't even, okay.

Chris (02:19):
All right.
That's it.
That's my, that's what, that'smy fa mail also.
I think I need more Botox.
I haven't done it in a while andI think I'm gonna go back and
get some more.
Yeah.

Sarah (02:28):
I don't really see that much of a, I don't really see
the difference the Botox makes.
That's because you look at mysoul.
Exactly.
Like I really like people tellme and I'm like, wow.
Yeah, everything looks realsmooth, but I feel like it
looked smooth before.
I don't know.
Again, like the people lookingat you, do not see what But if
the Botox makes you feel betterand you can afford it, go for

(02:49):
it.
Get your face all needled up.
Don't do anything with your lipsthough.
Please don't do anything withyour lips.
I, that's all I ask.

Chris (02:55):
They want, my lips are so small that they wouldn't even be
able to find where to put the,like they're just,

Sarah (03:01):
they're like, we can can't, but then they would find
them and then they would turnout like, what is the commercial
that now has Jason Bateman init?
shit, nevermind.
We're gonna go ahead and goright past it.
He ends up with big puff, puffylips?
No, he ends up with big puffylips in the commercial.

Chris (03:15):
Is it for Botox?

Sarah (03:17):
No.
Is it for fillers?
No, I think it's for insurance.
I dunno.

Chris (03:20):
Is he turning into his parents

Sarah (03:22):
when you call for Batman and you get Bait Man, and then
he gets chained up by PoisonIvy, I think.
And then he, she kisses him.
And then at one point, I'venever actually watched the whole
thing happen.
It sounds like you've watchedthe commercial a couple of
times.
I've listened to it.
Okay.
And yeah, so it ends with him.

(03:43):
Realizing that she's poison ivyand he, his lips are also won.
Be like, that makes senseAnyway.
Okay.
Alright.
So I heard from a few people andnothing like Major or earth
chattering, but I still wannamention a few people.
Shannon was super excited tolisten to Moisture then an
Oyster and hear her herselfmentioned.
So nice.
She sent me a text and said, ah,you've mentioned me in the

(04:06):
podcast.
I just listened to Moisture thanan oyster.
Then, stop saying it.
Another one.
Shannon's husband is now alsolistening.
And, he reached out to me about,I think it was yesterday.
He listened to the last twoepisodes and he asked what
happened with the sound qualityon the last one?
I was like, oh, that was the Saminterview.

(04:27):
And I feel like I didn't thinkit was bad at the time, and I
still don't think it was thatbad.
But when we have guests on,we're gonna need to figure out,
I think the headphones and themicrophone make a difference.

Chris (04:41):
Yes, the headphone do.
Yes.
The headphones and themicrophone make a big
difference.
So guests will need headphones.
At the very least.

Sarah (04:50):
I feel like we're not gonna require that.
want them to show I'm gonna be a

Chris (04:52):
stickler.

Sarah (04:53):
I'm gonna

Chris (04:54):
be a stickler

Sarah (04:55):
just so Chad will be happy.
There you go, Chad.
see, it's what happens.
It's what happens when you giveus feedback.
We, you, we take action.
No, we ignore you.
We say, you know what?
we're gonna do whatever ourinterview person does'cause
We're, because we're happy tohave them.
Generally just excited.
Other people wanna hang out withus.
Yeah.
Yeah.
okay.
Next I heard from Lori and herhusband Bobby.

(05:19):
They're both listening now, andLori said, I love your podcast
voice.
And I said, it's about time thatmanly smoker esque voice paid
off.
God dammit.
She said, I love your smoker'svoice, so Yay Lori.
Keep listening.
Bobby, keep listening too.
There's more I wanted to saythere, but I'm not.
So the next one we heard fromRick in the email.

(05:39):
I'm assuming you haven't lookedat the email in 10 weeks.
but Rick sent us an email withsome logos in it.
Stop it.
And there's one, there's a bunchof'em.
and there's one that says Themental Funny Bone.
It's supposed to be hard.
Did we talk about this taglinealready?
No.
Okay.
we might have.

(05:59):
I could,
but
I feel like
that's it, man.
That's it.
I want a T-shirt.

Chris (06:04):
I've never wanted a t-shirt.
More than I want a t-shirt thatsays it's supposed to be hard.

Sarah (06:10):
Yeah.
I feel like that's where we'regonna go.
So Rick will be reaching out toyou to give you some feedback on
the logo.
Loving it.
There's nine pages of logostuff.
It's very fun.
So you could check that out atyour convenience.
Christie.
So excited.
I don't know if I

Chris (06:24):
can not look

Sarah (06:25):
at it during the podcast.
Easter, let's talk about theweekend.

Chris (06:29):
Oh yeah, let's talk about the weekend.
let's talk about

Sarah (06:32):
Easter real quick.
Do we need to talk about Easter,or do we just wanna go straight
to Pope?

Chris (06:36):
We had ham, and then I had a, I'm escalating

Sarah (06:38):
a lot of ham.
There's a lot of ham.

Chris (06:40):
I had a bad belly ache and I think it might have been
kabai related.
Have eaten a lot of kabai.
I don't know.
I haven't hit myself yet.
Ooh.
It was a close thing.
It was a close thing, but in, intrue me fashion, I went back
into those leftovers and justate them.
Damn You did.

Sarah (06:56):
we're not quitters.
I was like, it's obviously thisfood uhhuh, but you know what
I'm gonna do?
I'm gonna keep eating it.
It's fine.
But this food was really tasty.
It only hurt.
It only hurt for a little while.
It's okay.
I was only sweat through onepair of clothes.
It's fine.

Chris (07:14):
Homer Simpson with that giant hogie where he eats so
much rotten food that hehallucinates that.
You have to look it up.
Oh

Sarah (07:24):
God, I'm

Chris (07:25):
crying.

Sarah (07:26):
Anytime we can reference Homer Simpson makes me super
happy.

Chris (07:29):
How did Owen enjoy his gift?
He has a giant Homer Simpsont-shirt now.
'cause I bought it for your dadand it doesn't fit him.
'cause his round belly, he lovedthat though.

Sarah (07:40):
He loves the t-shirt.
So we actually end up going tothe driving range after you guys
left'cause it was so nice and Iwasn't quite ready to go to bed.
I think Noah was, I think Noahwas a little disappointed that I
was like, let's go to thedriving range.
No, it's five o'clock.
he held his wine.
He was like, I can't drive.
I was like, whoa, good thing I'mhere.
So yes, we went to the drivingrange and we were getting ready

(08:02):
to leave.
And Owen, I dunno what he waswearing, was he wearing that?
Oh, if you ain't, if you ain'tfirst, your last shirt righty.
Bobby Ricky, Bobby shirt has ahole in it.
Like he looks like trash.
And I was like, Owen, you gottach change your fucking shirt.
So what's he do?
'cause he's brilliant and whywould he go into his bedroom and
find anything?
He reaches into that bag thatnutty brought up with t-shirts,

(08:24):
throws on his ocean aisleT-shirts.
And I was like, that pitch youreally nicely.
You look good.
Okay, nice.
And speaking of the drivingrange, that is how out of shape
I am.
Did you get winded?
I hit 10, 10 balls.
I do have a good swing, I'lltell you that.
when I connect, what I mean,even if I don't connect, it
looks good.
But when I connect, it looksreally good.

(08:45):
But there are several timeswhere I won't even hit the ball.
But anyway, my upper body stillhurts.
That was Sunday, maybe 15 ballsat the most.
But yeah, it was, yeah, I waslike, wow, I'm gonna be real
sore.
So yeah, I'm sore here.
I'm sore here.
It's sore.
So

Chris (09:05):
I am enjoying our accountability texts so that we
can avoid, yeah, we getting soreat the golfing range.

Sarah (09:13):
Yeah, we're getting back into that.
it's time for change andconsistency and so we woke up
early this morning, texted eachother, I put my workout pants on
backwards.
I didn't realize until I waswalking on the treadmill and I
was like, wow, these weird, andthen I like wiped my hands down
the back of my legs and felt theUnder Armour emblem on the back.

(09:36):
And I was like, Ooh, these arewrong, the wrong way.

Chris (09:39):
I did that thing where I sat in the parking lot of the
yoga studio for five minutesworking up the courage to go
into the yoga studio.
'cause you have to admit thatyou haven't been there in 10
years.
And I have to be like, okay, noone cares.
No no one gives a shit again.
We go back Happy that you'rethere.
Right there.
I'm gonna go back to the tenant.

(09:59):
The guiding light principle ofour podcast is that nobody gives
a shit.

Sarah (10:04):
Nobody gives a shit.
Nope.
Ze shit.
There I was.

Chris (10:08):
Yep.
Grabbing my little yoga mat andheading on it.
My rear end is sore.

Sarah (10:13):
I feel like that's

Chris (10:14):
wait till tomorrow.
It's

Sarah (10:15):
always sore like one or two days after.
I.

Chris (10:17):
And because I am, bad at keeping a calendar sometimes I
scheduled, this morning's yogasession like a week and a half
ago.
I was like, I'm gonna, I'm gonnago.
I'm gonna go.
I'm gonna go.
and then yesterday getting readyto find a place to take your mom
to yoga someplace closer so wewon't have to drive so far.
Yeah, we're gonna go toCalifornia and go to yoga in

(10:40):
California.
But I signed up for a classthere tonight, Ooh, fun.
Yoga.
Now I have two.
Yoga.
Yoga, so youre gonna doubleyoga.

Sarah (10:47):
I feel like that's two yoga

Chris (10:48):
classes.
Is it?
I don't know.
I

Sarah (10:50):
think so.
Yoga,

Chris (10:51):
the more breathing and focusing on my breath that I can
do, the better off.
I think.
I'm gonna feel there.
There got to be a point in theyoga, like 50 minutes into it
where I was like, yes, this isawesome.
Yeah.
I was like, this is amazing.
Now I remember why I do this.
Yeah, I had a great date, to behonest.

Sarah (11:12):
Yeah, I feel like, sorry,

Chris (11:14):
Becca.
Becca didn't have a good day.
Yeah, sorry.

Sarah (11:16):
Becky had Becky.
Becky, and then I called herBecky and made it fucking worse.
She's crying right now.
You can't

Chris (11:23):
hear because we put her on mute, but dare She's crying
there.
There it
is.
There it is.
shut your whole stop calling herBecky.

Sarah (11:31):
Sorry, Becca.
Becca had a shit day.
I apologize.
We had amazing days, but I had agreat day.
I need to get up 10 minutes,just 10 minutes earlier to make
it all work exactly the way Iwant to.
But it worked out like I endedup just being five minutes later
than I wanted to sitting down atmy desk.
But I took my time, like I didnot rush at all.
And I think that's like themajor difference.
Like I've been getting up andgetting on the treadmill, but

(11:52):
I've been rushing through all ofit, like doing 20 minutes
instead of 30 minutes, doingfive minutes of meditation
instead of 10 minutes.
So I did all the stuff.
I did all the stuff thismorning.

Chris (12:04):
You will be surprised to hear that I was pulling into the
parking lot just as the nicelady was locking, was standing
at the doorway.
So then I needed my five minutesto get my shit together and she
was like peeking out.
She's are you gonna?
And I was like, Hey Nikki.
And she was like, oh, it's sonice to see you.
And I was like, it's five 30.

Sarah (12:26):
Yeah, you'll be fine.
You'll be fine.
Get back.
Get back into it.
And like I said this morning,consistency, we just have to it.
Consistency.
Plus I like Noah was leavingthis morning, he was like,
you're gonna wake up the dog.
Whatcha are you gonna do?
Because normally I'd just letmacho do his thing.
I said, no, I'm waking up thedog.
I'm done with my workup workout.
I'm waking up the dog.
We're gonna go for a little walkjust down the driveway.

(12:48):
'cause that's as far as hislittle legs can go.
Or as far as I've trained him togo, you're done right buddy?
Yeah.
gotta go back.
Gotta go back now.
Meanwhile, he's we please golonger.
no.
Mommy's gonna work.
No dogs like that.
But yeah.
So we're, it's gonna be aroutine time for Macho too.

Chris (13:04):
Yay.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I like it.
So

Sarah (13:06):
I like it.
He should be exhausted.

Chris (13:08):
You know what helps us?
I bet if we read a book calledAtomic Habits, we would be
better at building habits.
Oh

Sarah (13:14):
God, it's amazing.
It is.
I think no number of books willever make it just be easy.
There's, it's just not, it's notgonna happen.
Once again, we're gonna have todo this consistently over and
over again.
Maybe it will be a little biteasier because we at least are,
can go back to that real quickand be like, oh yeah, that's
what I should be doing.
It's supposed to be hard.
Yeah.

(13:34):
And it is.
It really fucking is sometimes.
Alright, you wanna talk aboutthe Pope?
I would love to.
I, here's what I was hoping Ireally wanted to get on this So
Call with you excited and Iwanted you to give me the
rundown, I am really hoping thatyou came prepared.
Let me pull up my notes, gimmethe rundown of what is going on

(13:57):
now.
I know the Pope died.
There you go.
I do love it that he died theday after Easter.
he did his last thing on Easter,and I feel like that's a very, I
love that.
I do love that.
Yes.
So I thought that was very,

Chris (14:09):
but trying to find my notes.
I haven't

Sarah (14:11):
really, I've just listened to my peeps on Good
Morning America.
James Longman, he did somereporting and Michael Strahan,
he's over there right now where,wherever they are, the v Michael
Strahan is with the pope.

Chris (14:23):
He's at the back.
Where is JD Vance right now?
'cause I wanna talk about that.

Sarah (14:28):
Yes, I'm gonna, okay.
I'm done talking.
You talk.
I might, when you bring up JDVance again, I might have
something to say, but go ahead.

Chris (14:35):
Did you, I, this is a bit.
Besides the point, this is offtopic.
Did you see JD Vance break thatsports statue or some people
would call it the trophy.
First of all, let's recognizethe eu, what did
you call it?
The sports?
What Statue.
Sports statue.
It's almost as thing you'venever played as board in your

(14:57):
life, right?
Like I wasn't an

Sarah (14:59):
athlete.
hey, let's make fun of JD Vance,and then I'll say something like
sports statue.
In, in our defense, that'sprobably what he fucking calls
it too.
It's fine.

Chris (15:06):
they handed it to him and he tried to put it back
together.
did somebody?
Yeah.
And there was, is somebodyfucking with him?
if you guys haven't seen it,regardless of where your
political affiliations, it's

Sarah (15:17):
freaking spectacular.

Chris (15:18):
it's amazing.

Sarah (15:19):
It's

Chris (15:19):
just funny to watch a grown man try to, try to act
like you didn't break a trophy,this statue.

Sarah (15:26):
It's, yeah, it's amazing.
And I, I don't know, just hisreaction and everybody like
stumbling around, right?
And everyone's trying to helphim.
it's okay.
It's all right.
Mean they give it, like in someof their faces in the
background, they're like, ohfuck.

Chris (15:40):
Like this guy

Sarah (15:41):
Jesus.
And again, I say this fuckingguy.

Chris (15:46):
dude, it's not like we worked really hard and dedicated
our entire lives up until thispoint to get that.
feel free to write now.
Destroy it.
Becca's playing it right now.
It's the best.
Oh my God.
God.
It makes me so happy.
Hilarious.

Sarah (16:00):
Okay.
Alright.
I'm gone crying.
Oh, what?
Okay.
The Pope back to the Pope.
The Pope.
The Pope.
Okay.

Chris (16:06):
what do they call the pope?
The po Pontiff.
He's a pontiff?
Yeah.
Okay.
He's a pontiff.
Okay.
so if the Pope dies or he did.
Or he can also resign and thatkind of triggers the same
process.
'cause you'll remember, Ithought you were gonna
say rise.
You were gonna say it couldrise.
rise like Jesus.
I was like, no, we're, no.
that's why we have to have a new pope.

(16:26):
Okay.
Go ahead.
It's a, and this process iscalled a, but this is great.

Sarah (16:30):
I'm sorry.
I'm gonna interrupt you for the80th time and I promise it won't
be the last I This is great tohear.
This is great to hear though.
'cause I honestly today wasthinking, what happens, if the
Pope just gets too old, like canthey step down?
So Yeah, can they can.

Chris (16:45):
Okay.
They can resign.
okay.
Yeah.
The one guy was like, yeah,totally in.
I wanna be Pope.
Remember he was like Pope forfour days and he was like, Ugh,
I don't like it.
Which one was, I don't remember.
Benedict.
Benedict, the XVII was gonna tooBenedict the XVI.
He was just

Sarah (17:01):
A

Chris (17:01):
little

Sarah (17:01):
bit,

Chris (17:02):
yeah.

Sarah (17:02):
Okay.
Yeah.

Chris (17:03):
And then he resigned.
And what that does is that itkicks off at Papal Conclave.
A what?
Papal.
Papal Pap.
Papal pap.
Papal conclave.
Yes.
Okay.
So that's the process by whichthey select the new Pope.
when the Pope dies, there's aperiod of mourning called the
ve.
Mm-hmm.
I went to Catholic school, NOIs,Novem, Dialis.

(17:28):
There's nine days of mourningthat happen.
And, they start, making a lotof, phone calls and sending a
bunch of text messages around tothe, the guys who are in the
running, like the popularcardinals.
Yeah.
And they're like, dude, we'repicking a new leader.
So if you wanna show up, can yougrab a grab Carnival Carni
Carnival, grab that othercarnival.

(17:51):
Yeah.
Grab, just grab Jamie, grab theother guy to bring him with you.
Don't nobody go near JD Vance.
I knew he was, he seems a bitshady, like a very prominent
brow and like dark eyes, but Ididn't realize he was an
assassin.
So JD Vance visited with thePope, and then he died the next
day.
So coincidence,
JD

(18:11):
Vance, IV was there on Sunday.
Yeah.
And then he died.

Sarah (18:14):
The ruiner of all things, the ruiner of the sports statues
and the pope stop calling it asports statue.
Why do you mock me?
There's no way.
There's actually no way I'm evergonna call it anything else.
I have to write it down to makesure that my brain will remember
it.
Sports statue.
It's so funny.

Chris (18:32):
It's exactly what it is though.
I mean it is, it really is.
I think, so the conclave happensin the Sistine Chapel.
You may remember the SistineChapel from, painted ceiling
fame.

Sarah (18:45):
Yeah.
Yeah.

Chris (18:47):
So Monticello, the turtles paint it Monticello is
what I have in my notes, but Ithink it was Michelangelo.

Sarah (18:54):
Okay.
That's why I thought it was aninja turtle.

Chris (18:57):
It was, yeah.
Michelangelo, he was the surferguy, right?
The surfer turtle.
Yeah.

Sarah (19:02):
He, he could do a lot of flipping, so I feel like it's,
he's just flipping all over theplace and paint.
Go on.
It's not even fun.
Did they all

Chris (19:08):
like pizza?

Sarah (19:10):
Oh yeah.
I've always never listenlistening to the pizza.

Chris (19:13):
So one of the key selection criteria is only
Cardinals under the age of 80can vote, and there's usually
around 120 of them.
So don't we have a cardinal inPittsburgh?
don't we have a, don't we have acardinal?
I feel like we do.

Sarah (19:26):
Ubic.

Chris (19:28):
Ubic.
Or is that a bishop?
Is he a cardinal?
Is

Sarah (19:29):
a bishop and a cardinal the same thing?
What's a bishop and Cardinal?
No, they're different.

Chris (19:32):
They're different.
You gotta get, I know you gottaget the promo.
Bishops wear like white hatsmaybe.
And cardinals wear red ones.
I don't, the good thing aboutthis is there will be no
listeners that know more aboutthis than I do.

Sarah (19:44):
there might be, we might get a whole education on it
after this.
Not that anybody fucking emailsus anymore, but, okay.

Chris (19:51):
So did you know that the papal ring gets destroyed?
Like they take it off of hiscold dead hands and they destroy
it so that no one can, sothere's no pope now?
No one can pretend to be thepope.
There's no like sub pope.
There's no interim pope.
the body lies in three coffinsand I don't know if they like
switch it out.

(20:11):
Like I don't know what theprocess is there, but one is of
Cyprus wood, one is of lead, andone is of Elmwood.
I have no idea why, but I guessthey switch him around, saw him.
The one

Sarah (20:21):
he's in now, the one he's in now is a very simple wooden
coffin.
Maybe it's the cypress wood.
Yeah, they said that's what herequested though.
But I don't, maybe I wasn'tlistening.
Maybe it was just his tombstonethat they were talking about.
He requested very simple withjust one word on it that I
believe is his name in Italianor something.
I dunno.
Anyway,

Chris (20:39):
what is it?

Sarah (20:39):
What

Chris (20:39):
his name in Italian is.
It's a simple man, Francis.

Sarah (20:42):
Yeah.
I don't know.
No, it's something fancy, right?
It was something fancy thatMichael Strahan told me this
morning.

Chris (20:48):
Michael Stray.
Strahan.
Pontificating about the pontiff.

Sarah (20:53):
Yeah.
Makes me, he knows it all,

Chris (20:55):
makes me laugh.
I love it.
The Cardinals like when it'stime for the conclave after the
lying in state.
They have a procession.
So they have a little, Popeparade, to get into the Sistine
Chapel and they do some chantingto invoke divine guidance so
that God can help them pick thenew Pope.
And they have a master ofceremonies, a master of

(21:18):
ceremonies.
They have an mc, like one of theCardinals is I'll do it.
I did open mic, I can be themaster of ceremonies.
And then they all go in thereand the master of ceremonies
calls out everyone out in Latin.
To make it official.
And then they lock the doorsfrom the outside and then none
of them can leave until theypicked a new pope.

(21:39):
There you go.
they take an oath of secrecy,which they, there's a whole oath
they have to say to each other,'cause no one else is gonna hear
it.
'cause they're in there.
Yeah.
The ballots are handwritten andthey have to disguise their
handwriting.
So it's completely anonymous.
There're

Sarah (21:53):
okay.

Chris (21:54):
Can we back

Sarah (21:54):
up one second?
Yeah,

Chris (21:56):
sure.

Sarah (21:56):
I would like to talk about the parade.
I'm sorry.
We're still back on the paradeof the Pope Parade.
I was trying to interrupt youand, but you wouldn't call me.
and I didn't wanna speak out ofturn.
Oh.

Chris (22:05):
Because I'm not looking at, I'm not looking at the
video.
I'm looking at my notes.
You'll have to

Sarah (22:09):
watch this on YouTube and me going like this.
Sorry, now I'm looking at youtake away, so if we could go
back to the parade.
It's the parade of theCardinals.
Yeah.
Cardinal

Chris (22:20):
Parade.
Yeah.

Sarah (22:20):
And they're 120 of them.

Chris (22:23):
Yes.

Sarah (22:24):
And they're probably between the ages of, I don't
know.
I don't know.
Something in 80.
Yeah.
Are they all walking, is it awalking parade or are they gonna
all be in those little class?
no.
You don't

Chris (22:35):
get the glass case until you're the pope.

Sarah (22:38):
Oh, okay.
I imagine they're just wandering

Chris (22:39):
around in their robes.
alphas did something similarwhen I was at Bethany College to
pick their present.
So
I think

Sarah (22:45):
it's a lot of, it's a lot of walking for those guys.
It's a lot.
And then disguising yourhandwriting.
I also feel at that older age,it's no need.
You're no need, fellas.
Everybody's shaking.
It doesn't shit's all over theplace.

Chris (22:58):
And they have, like, when they vote, it's very
prescriptive according to dogma.
so they, their ballots arehandwritten and every ballot
has, a illegal, in some ponti Ielect as Supreme Ponta.
I had French, you had Latin,

Sarah (23:15):
which is super funny,

Chris (23:17):
right?
Each ballot is folded twice.
Folded twice, and, placed on asilver, small silver plate.
I like that.
And then dropped into a chalice,which I'm assuming doesn't have
any liquid in it, because itwould defeat the purpose.
Yeah.
After voting, the ballots arecounted and then they're
stitched together.

Sarah (23:37):
Oh, wow.

Chris (23:38):
So they, apparently they have someone in there in
addition to a former standupcomedian who's the master of
ceremonies.
They have a seamstress in therewith them.
Wait, who

Sarah (23:48):
could be, who do we think should be the master ceremonies?

Chris (23:51):
There's gotta be, there was one funny pope, like they
were doing this, I forget if itwas like before the guy resigned
or after, but there was one,there was one cardinal that was
just a, he was just a crack up,and I forget which one he was.
I feel like it should be a

Sarah (24:04):
legit comedian, like Burt Reiser.

Chris (24:06):
no.

Sarah (24:06):
You can't, I feel like unleash him feel like should be,
no, I feel like that would be, Ifeel like they would laugh at
him.
If anybody's gonna make thatgroup laugh.
It's gonna be Bert Nate.
Nate

Chris (24:16):
Zi.

Sarah (24:17):
I'd like him too.

Chris (24:18):
he's so wholesome.
Like I think the Cardinals wouldbe like, yeah.
Sad man.
Yeah.

Sarah (24:22):
No, but yeah.
But Burt would come in with themachine.
We're coming with the shockfactor.
You wanna come with the machine?

Chris (24:27):
Yeah, absolutely.
He could tell them about hischildren and their special
means.

Sarah (24:32):
Absolutely.
And sticking their fingers inthe dog's butt.

Chris (24:35):
So that was our, that was ours first.
So they stitch the ballotstogether and then they catch
them on fire.
And then.
Special chemicals are added tothe ballot fire that produce
either black smoke or whitesmoke.
So to get the black smoke, theyburn damp straw with potassium
nitrate and anthro.
I don't know what anthro is andI don't know where you get

(24:58):
potassium nitrate.
do you go to your chem lab?
Like on the way in, who's

Sarah (25:02):
pouring?
do they have masks on to makesure?
'cause I feel like nobody shouldbe inhaling anything with names
like that.

Chris (25:08):
They're God's chosen disciples.
I don't think they're gonna needto wear masks.
They're fine if you say so.
Walked on water.
Water to wine.
I think he's not gonna letanything happen to these guys
that, that wasn't the Cardinals.
But under the protection ofJesus,

Sarah (25:24):
I don't think so.

Chris (25:25):
So proceed the white smoke says Yeah.
What?
look at us.
we got the Pope.
The black smoke says, no, wedon't.
No, we don't have the pope.
They need two thirds of all ofthe cardinals to vote.
I forgot the most intriguingthing about their oath of
secrecy.
That if they break it, if theybreak that oath, it can lead to

(25:49):
automatic excommunication fromthe Catholic church.
So I feel like that's not hard.
Really.
fuck

Sarah (25:55):
around and find out Cardinals.
I feel like people fuck aroundand find out all the time.
But when you said like youstarted ex cardinals, I thought
it was, I thought it was ex,what's the word?

Chris (26:05):
Ex extradition.
Extermination.

Sarah (26:07):
Executed.
Executed.
No, we don't ex I was like, wow.
that is

Chris (26:12):
really, that is intense.
so once they pick one of theseguys, pick one of these guys,
like the one who molested theleast amount of boys maybe is
the way to pick, I don't know.
Not

Sarah (26:22):
nice.
Not nice.
Not went too far.
You went too far.

Chris (26:26):
Mm.
the newly elected agree todisagree.
The newly elected, pope enters aside chamber, and it has a white
vestments in all sizes.
In case we get a fat pope or askinny pope is a vestment of
vest that's, it's close, it's arobe thing that they wear.
The thing that he puts over,that he puts it over is like a

(26:48):
red dress, I don't know.
In all sizes, I think is thething they key in on.
Yeah.
yeah, I like that.
I like that little teeny pope.
Like you could have a big pope,

Sarah (26:57):
you could a little pope.
I would like to see theopposite.
Like I would like to see the fatguy in a little coat, in a
little, in a

Chris (27:04):
fat pope in a little robe.
Yeah.

Sarah (27:08):
that's what I wanna see.

Chris (27:09):
My God.
And the room where he dresseshimself in his new, his fancy
new outfit that is called TheRoom of Tears.
I feel
The room of tears and it's because many popes have
wept here, overwhelmed by theburden they're about to take on.
Okay.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I will also remind you thatthroughout history, these were
some of the blood, most bloodthirsty motherfuckers ever.

(27:31):
oh, okay.
They're not, all of them crybecause it's a burden.

Sarah (27:35):
Yeah.

Chris (27:36):
So it's the room of tears.

Sarah (27:38):
I don't know much about the history of the Pope Hood.

Chris (27:40):
It's

Sarah (27:40):
fascinating.

Chris (27:41):
I was Catholic for a little while.
You grew up Catholic.
That's doesn't matter.
Doesn't matter.
I was blonde for a little while,and then doesn't matter and
matter.
They make a big announcement andthe new pope steps out.
Gives a blessing.
Says a few words.
His first appearance, this iswhat Chad is telling me.
His first appearance is bothsacred and historic and is,
watched by hundreds of millionsof people like the Queen.

Sarah (28:03):
Absolutely.
It's like almost as many peoplethat watch Meghan and Harry's

Chris (28:08):
wedding.
And that listen to this podcast.
Since 2005, the bells of St.
Peter's are rung to confirm asuccessful election in case the
smoke is hard to tell if it'sblack or white.
just a little bit of aconfirmation so people don't go
around like the one genderreveal party we went to.
I was just

Sarah (28:26):
gonna say, this is reminding me of a bad gender
reveal.

Chris (28:29):
I was like, is it a blue baby?
Wait, it looks great.
Why is it gray?

Sarah (28:33):
I don't understand.
Are they just kidding?
And they don't wanna know.
So they just gave us the greenbal.
I don't get it.

Chris (28:39):
So there you go.
That is the, that's thescuttlebutt over what's gonna
happen here in a couple of days.
Can you imagine getting lockedin with a bunch of people trying
to pick out like the next headcheerleader?
No.
Imagine any organization you'vebeen in.
No.
And they take the four mostpopular people in the soccer mom
booster club and they're like,you guys have to elect the next

(29:00):
president.
You can't come out until threeof you.
Agree.
I could see how that would go.

Sarah (29:05):
We'd be done pretty quick.

Chris (29:06):
All right.
Now I would threaten to beatpeople up.
You, but they're cardinals.
They can't do that.
I guess B Blood thirstymotherfucker at the boosters
meeting.
Yeah.
I don't know how your boostersmeetings go.

Sarah (29:17):
Yeah, no, we just, somebody it's like volunteers
for shit.

Chris (29:20):
Sometimes it's just like hot potato in those things
though.
Like I can't imagine even betterthan this, imagine the Delta
Zetas.
And like only the popular DeltaZetas get locked in a room and
they have to pick the nextpresident or

Sarah (29:35):
social, social, who would not be in that room?
Me, I was not the most popular.
Just in case you were wondering.
I was in my pledge cla pledgeclass.
I was the president.
But it's only because Iorganized people because I can't
stand an organization.

Chris (29:49):
Becca's mom and I both would've been in the room.
We were

Sarah (29:51):
Right.
Mostly

Chris (29:52):
due to boob

Sarah (29:53):
size.
Yeah.
You were also there for fourwhole years.
Like I was there for a semesteras a Delta Zeta and nobody even
remembers me.
It's fine.

Chris (30:02):
I forgot.
I.
That the pope has to pick a newname like his, he gets to change
his name.
Yeah.
I knew that.
One of the most fascinatingparts is he just picks a kind,

Sarah (30:12):
kinda like Latin class or French class where you can pick
your name.
What was your name in Latinclass?
Couldn't tell you.
Pela, which means girl?
No, Anastasia.
That's what it was.
I was Christine.
Yeah, in French.

Chris (30:25):
she didn't let me pick, like everyone else got to pick.
She was like, oh, you should beChristine and I, because I am
who I am.
I'm like, yeah, I should.
Okay now, because that's theright answer.
Who else

Sarah (30:35):
gets to be someone different here?
Why can't I?

Chris (30:37):
She's because you're gonna, you're gonna, you're
gonna be upfront answering allthe questions.
So you're just Christine.

Sarah (30:43):
Okay.
I don't like

Chris (30:43):
it.
so there you go.
that's the pope.
I like it.

Sarah (30:47):
yeah, I guess that's what we'll be hearing about for the
next month.
Or do

Chris (30:50):
you wanna tell a very brief, a growing up Gaster
story?
What do you have in mind?
do you remember when we went toSt.
Michael's Catholic School?
Yes.

Sarah (31:01):
That was my last go round with Catholicism

Chris (31:04):
flirtation.
With the Catholic church?
Yes.
And on.
We would have to go to mass onmaybe Wednesdays Friday, Fridays
during Lent.
We would go to stations of thecross.
And I really, I love thestations of

Sarah (31:15):
the cross dug.

Chris (31:16):
I don't know why.
Because I think like all theclasses were shorter, so we
couldn't do anything on Fridaysbecause we had to go to stations
of the cross, like right afterlunch.
I just

Sarah (31:25):
thought they were real cool and like the older class,
it's got to be like the actorsin them.
I got to be the one that wipeshis face.
Who was that and what station?
I don't remember.
Eight Random.
It's station eight, but his faceis on the, his face is

Chris (31:38):
on the Mrs.
Turrin Shroud.
Shroud.
Turrin.
But he

Sarah (31:43):
knew was really artsy.
I can't remember who it was.
Shaner,

Chris (31:47):
Mrs.
Shaer.
Was she fourth gr fifth grade?
Fourth grade.

Sarah (31:50):
Fourth grade, fourth grade.
a rounder lady hair, like Yeah,exactly.
White hair.
Her, yeah.
She was a very talented artist.
She was, yes.
She made his face on the cloththat I had to wipe him with.
It was fun.
I do love the stations lacrosse,and I think it's because it's
artsy.

Chris (32:04):
Yeah.
Yeah.
it was a hoot.
I liked it because we we got tochange places.
Like we got to be someplacedifferent.

Sarah (32:11):
Yeah.

Chris (32:12):
I was like, this is fun.
Look where we are.
We're in church.
And then we had to sit there inchurch and I was like, in these,
they were like, oh,

Sarah (32:19):
this was fun while I was walking over to the church.

Chris (32:21):
Wow.
Now that I'm sitting here,

Sarah (32:23):
the cross kind of, these are long, she's, now I

Chris (32:25):
know why we have to leave right after lunch going so long.
Forever.
Is it 12 of them?
Are there 12 stations across?

Sarah (32:31):
I don't know.
I can't even remember.
I'm feeling bad about it.
I was, I wanna go next year now.

Chris (32:36):
I would love to go to, anyway.
Anyway.
Anyway, so our gaster story ofthe week is about your mom,
Nita, your mom?
No, your mom.
Your mom.
nails off.
it's about our mom.
And, she would come to mass whenwe would have, children's mass
and she would sit in the backand we would sing hymns.
And for some reason, like onetime she cried, I'm guessing she

(32:59):
was just having a really bad,existential crisis because she
had to raise the two of us.
And she was married to Jumbo andshe was like, it's, questioning,
crying every day.
All the, every decision she evermade.
And she's and I'm free in the,in the daytime during the week
to come to.
Mass.
Yeah.
So that's probably why she wascrying.
But we looked over and like thegirls in my class, the

(33:22):
Jennifer's Jen Taral, JenCraighead, Jen Neeson, they were
like, oh, your mom's crying.
Oh, it's so cute.
And we were like, oh.
And everyone made a little afuss and we were like, look,
she's crying because we'resinging with such sweetly
voices.
no.
and then she would come to Massand we would sing, let all the
little children come to me orwhatever, children's mass hymns,

(33:46):
we would sing.
I don't, I, the church iscreepy.
it just is what, Jesus loves thechildren, so do the any, but
Nita would cry.
Not all churches are

Sarah (33:55):
creepy.

Chris (33:56):
Nita would cry, at these masses.
And we were so delighted becausewe were such special sweet
little angels in the fifth gradethat we can make her cry.
Why was she crying?
And I don't seriously, I thinkit was because she had to raise
the two of us and she wasmarried to Jumbo and she was
free in the middle of the day.

Sarah (34:14):
Mom, can you tell us why you were crying?
We'd like to know.
Yeah, you can tell

Chris (34:17):
us now.
For real.
I know, I don't remember.

Sarah (34:19):
Wasnt because have I was like paying attention.
I don't remember.

Chris (34:24):
I'm gonna, I don't, maybe you shouldn't ask her.
Maybe you don't wanna know the

Sarah (34:27):
answer.
I do.
I wanna know

Chris (34:30):
maybe if like strong-willed children were too
much for her.
she did a hell of a job.
yeah, we turned out amazing.
We're doing good things foreverybody.
Yeah.
But vote on mom.
Her mom was, she was like thehomeroom mom, so she was there
all the time.
All the time.
Like she participated in her andGina

Sarah (34:45):
Asha.

Chris (34:46):
Her and Gina Asha participated in everything like
Every party, they were handingout snacks.
Every science fair, they weredirecting traffic, stationed to
the cross.
I got to go home with my momafters.
Maybe that's why I liked it somuch.
That was

Sarah (35:01):
the best part.
That was the best

Chris (35:02):
part

Sarah (35:02):
of mommy doing everything is we got to leave.
We didn't have to ride the bus.

Chris (35:05):
We didn't have to ride the bus.
Amazing.
Everything.
Have to

Sarah (35:08):
just leave with mom.
Yeah.

Chris (35:09):
Yeah.
this is in the day when

Sarah (35:10):
you could've just walked out

Chris (35:12):
anyway.
No one Right where I think welost Isaac Wall the one time
where he just walked away.
He was at the playground.
Yeah.
That's what happens

Sarah (35:19):
when you have the playground across the street
there.

Chris (35:21):
This is, miss Chilling, which she should.
We tortured her.
She was our third grade teacher.

Sarah (35:26):
Oh, I don't remember that.

Chris (35:27):
Yeah, she figured out she didn't wanna be teacher after
she had us,

Sarah (35:30):
Oh, okay.
Yeah.
Sounds right.
Yeah.

Chris (35:32):
Yep.
Anyway, so that is, that's myreally brief gastric story of
the week.
Shall we talk about the book?
Shall we get into the book?
Yeah.

Sarah (35:40):
So here's the thing.
So I took some notes.
I'm annoyed.

Chris (35:44):
Oh no.
By this book?

Sarah (35:46):
Yeah.
So I took some notes and Ithought it might be entertaining
if I just read the notes andevery once in a while you could
just explain things to me.
Okay.
'cause I think that's what'shappening.
I think I'm just Okay.
I'm ready.
I am.
I'm not grasping.
I'm too, I don't know what itis.
I start here with, I need helpwith this book.

(36:07):
I think what's screwing me up isthe types of new environments
I'm trying to create.
Like one minute I'm thinkingabout how I will start to change
my routine to work out everymorning, get my shit together.
So what does that look like inmy mind?
So I should be doing that?
I don't, but I don't know.
But after this chapter, I don'tfucking know.
Maybe I'm just too literal forthis book.

(36:28):
I feel like I can't understand,or I feel like if I can
understand how meditating canhelp me, I should be able to
understand this book.
So I'm getting a little bitannoyed back to the types of
environments.
This is exactly what I typed,I'm reading it word for word.
Okay.

Chris (36:43):
So is that what you typed?
Like maybe once I figure out howto meditate, yeah.

Sarah (36:47):
No, I, no, what I meant there was, I didn't say, once I
figure out how to meditate, I,what I wrote there was, I feel
like if I can understand how tomeditate, that I shouldn't have
that much trouble understandingwhat's in this book.
So anyway, I have my morningroutine change and habits in my
head, like how I'm gonna dothat.
And then he comes out with theexamples of MLK and Gandhi, I'm

(37:10):
obviously doing something wrong,right?
so then I think I'm way off.
But then maybe should I, insteadof just talking about my morning
routine, should I be thinkingabout what I wanna do when I
grow up?
Is that the bigger thing?
what should I be focusing on?

Chris (37:28):
I think you're making, you're, making it a little
derivative.
Like you're like, okay, I justneed to think differently about
my current immediate environmentand what you really need to
think about when we're lookingat atomic habits and we're
talking about reframing youridentity, we're talking about
that as an environment.

(37:48):
The space I live in isn't thisone where I get up and I'm like,
fuck, shit, I have 8,000 thingsto do.
Like it's broader and more.
Ethereal.
I think like you're wanting itto be amazingly literal like
you're wanting it to be.
That's what I said I did.
I am

Sarah (38:03):
just too literal.
But I think, I just feel like,alright, let me continue on here
for a second.
So and then you can take overcompletely.
'cause I'm fucked.
You're fine.
So that's pretty much thebeginning.
Yda, yada, yada, yada.
So then I started going throughlike things I highlighted, so
things I highlighted, the wayyou think directly affects your
life.

(38:24):
My note after this is no shit.

Chris (38:27):
Thank you.
I'm

Sarah (38:27):
so glad I spent money on your book.
Perfect.
As you continually think aboutyour problems, you will only
create more of the same type ofproblems for yourself.
Okay.
So we're talking about dwellingon your problems like.
I could buy into that.
That makes sense there.
I get the logic there.
okay.
And maybe you think about yourproblem so much because it was

(38:47):
your thinking that created themin the first place.
This is where I'm like, I don'tlike, I feel like maybe is the
key word here.
But the truer statement would bethat you're responsible for how
you react to your problems, notthat you've thought them into
existence.
Yes,

Chris (39:06):
you are correct.

Sarah (39:08):
And that, I think that's what's getting on my nerves.
And then if I go down a littlebit further, in order to change,
you must have your thoughts, youmust have in your thoughts and
idolize self a model you canemulate, which is different from
and better than the you thatexist today in your environment,
body and time.
So this is where the MLK andGandhi references come in and

(39:30):
that, and it makes sense to melike the, yeah.
Where we're going there.
It makes sense.
And then, and externalenvironments are the same.
When you're continually thinkingin the past and based on your
memories, your thoughtsdetermine your reality.
And if you keep thinking thesame shit, you're going to
continue to produce the samereality.
Okay.
He said, so I, at this point,I'll stop because everything

(39:51):
else I read, everything else Iwrite is, you just said that in
the last sentence, and then twosentences down, he says the same
thing.
And then he says the same thing.
And then down here he says thesame thing.
So now I am annoyed to the pointwhere I feel like I'm reading a
contract, which I get annoyedwith because I feel like lawyers
just throw big words out thereto make themselves feel smarter.

(40:15):
Yeah.
And that's what I feel like thisguy's doing at this point.
Like he's just saying the sameshit in a different fancy ass
way to make it sound different,but it's literally like this.
I feel like the chapter couldhave been summed up in about two
sentences.

Chris (40:31):
Yes.
a hundred percent.
this is a wordy motherfuckingbook.
there are a lot of words.
A lot of words.
And then the words are repeatedand then there's an example That
kind of is what I'm thinking,but isn't really.
Yeah.
And then there's another examplethat's different from the fra.
The, it's, it's a bit of a, it'sa bit of a thing here is the

(40:53):
important.
point in this chapter, I think,you have to think greater than
your environment.
And that's what you mean, likeit, am I Gandhi?
Probably not.
Am IMK?
No.
Am I a person who accepts thefact that they're a hundred
pounds overweight and doesnothing to fix that?
Absolutely not.
I am a person who could conceiveof a reality where I wasn't a

(41:15):
hundred pounds overweight.
I thought that through, I tooksome action and I have created a
new reality for myself.
Do you know what I mean?

Sarah (41:25):
Yeah.
And I think like my way ofthinking of that, and maybe it's
just how we express it again,back to the words, is that.
It's your thoughts.
What they're actually doing isthey're motivating you.
Like you have the good thoughtsabout the greater you and what
you can be, and that's providingmotivation and it's getting you
to light a fire under your assand do something about it.

(41:47):
It's not, the thoughtsthemselves aren't making it
happen, aren't actions.
Maybe they are.
That's really because if Ithought, I don't feel like being
a hundred pounds overweightanymore, so if I just keep
thinking about it, those ahundred pounds will go away.

Chris (42:01):
I'm willing.
No, I feel like the tapping intothe quantum part of this is
understanding that, even if I'mnot taking a direct action on
something, like even if I canconceive of a place where I am
a, I'm a really good leaderbecause I make leader type

(42:21):
decisions and I understand whatbeing a really great leader
means.
I don't have to, I don't have togo into every meeting and be
like, okay, what would a goodleader, what would a good leader
do by thinking about not being ashitty leader?
I am making the reality of beinga good leader come into being.
Do you know what I mean?

(42:41):
I am moving the needle in someway without.
It's like the hunger things,really doing anything.
Yeah.
You're increasing your odds.
Like I, by thinking about what Iwant to be and by thinking about
how my actions line up with myvalues, just like all of the
other books.
By understanding and keepingthat single thread like we were
talking about last week, whenyou're envisioning that single

(43:04):
thread of what you wanna be bykeeping that in mind, you are
making subconscious decisions toget there and the more that you
can open your mind to makingthose subconscious decisions and
the less you need to rely onthat pause we talk about all the
time.
Yeah.
that's tapping into the quantumpiece of it.

(43:25):
Like the more you can So my kindof

Sarah (43:26):
being too literal, that's exactly what my problem is.

Chris (43:30):
Yeah.
Yeah.
if you think about, if you thinkabout any skill that you have,
right?
Like you learned how to drive,you didn't do that until you
were 16, but when you first didit, you were like, all right,
don't wreck.
Don't wreck.
Don't wreck.
Yeah.
don't wreck.
Stay in the lane.
Okay?
Settle movements with the wheel.
And then three years later,you've got one foot out the
window, you're smoking, eating ahamburger, amen.

(43:52):
Pissing with the CDs, yeah.
Because you looking in your rearview mirror and

Sarah (43:57):
thinking, did I go through that?
Was I red?
Was that red when I went, did Irun over an animal where she,
where, how did I get here?

Chris (44:05):
And it like, you became a driver because, and.
That's, that makes sense.
It's like a, an easy examplewhere you didn't really have to
put any effort into it.
You didn't have to, you didn'thave to keep your eye on the
prize, so to speak.
But if you can keep your eye onthe prize, if you can focus on
that one thread that you want tobecome reality out of all of the

(44:26):
options that are out there, thenyou make decisions that are in
tune with that.
The longer, the more you focuson changing your brain, like
meditation and the more youfocus on, like when you're first
driving, you're all, all likethis, right?
You're like a tiny littlesphincter that is clinched up so

(44:47):
tight.
I was gonna say, is that my butthole?
That is your butt hole.
you're so tight.
You're like, okay, alright.
Don't be a driver.
And then, once you go throughthe process of learning and once
you go through, some of thethings that, that make you a
driver, then you're able torelax and become a driver.
And same thing if you wanna bean athlete, right?

(45:08):
You're like, okay, I gottaconcentrate on getting up every
day at five 30.
I gotta get up at five 30 untilyou're the person that gets up
at five 30 until you're theperson who like subconsciously
chooses, good fruits instead ofan emotional support bowl of
candy.

Sarah (45:24):
Then that brings me to, so those are like the atomic
habits.
Like you're just, yeah, you'redoing these things because
you've done them, but doesn't hesay in this chapter that's not
what you should do?

Chris (45:34):
It's a mental rehearsal, is what you're going through,
like you're going through.

Sarah (45:39):
Like when he says, we remained plugged into the past
by following highly routine,unconscious set of automatic
behaviors.
And when he's talking aboutplugged into the past, he's not
saying that's a positive thing.

Chris (45:51):
no.
you wanna be plugged into thefuture.
So it's choosing which thing todo by rote, which thing to do on
autopilot.
if I leave my brain right now onautopilot, I'm gonna sleep in
until five minutes before myfirst meeting tomorrow and pop
up outta bed.
Like I'll do that by rote.
Okay.
Do you know what I mean?
Where I want to get to?
Yeah.
I just think it's is, I don't

Sarah (46:10):
know.

Chris (46:10):
I think I,

Sarah (46:11):
I think it, you're, it just drives me nuts that you're
saying, like you've said athousand times in this chapter
at.
Basically, you're just living inthe past.
And that's why you can't makeany changes because you're just
living in the past and you'vegotten into this because you're
just a routine person.
You're waking up and you rollover and you look at your
partner and you know that's yourhusband.

(46:32):
that's because that's whatyou've looked at every morning
for the past 20 years, whatever.
Or and that's not necessarilywhat you wanna do.
But then in the same breath,that's what you wanna do.
So it's just, you have to makethe better choices of what you
are going to plug yourself into.

Chris (46:49):
think about the, think about whether or not you want
to, you wanna be connected tothe past or whether or not you
wanna be to be connected to apotential future.

Sarah (46:58):
And then it might be my problem is just, I think he's
saying the same thing thatMichael Dravet said.
yeah.
And the same thing that MarkManson said, and I just like the
way that Mark Manson and MichaelDravet said it better, right?

Chris (47:08):
Stop being the, because they didn't say

Sarah (47:10):
too many fancy words and throw a bunch of other words in
there, fulfiller.

Chris (47:14):
But this is giving you a.
Potential way to do it thatisn't just do the habits.
Let's see what we can do ifwe're using meditation as a tool
to change where we're connectinginside of our brains, let's use
meditation as a tool to help us,not focus on the past, but focus
on where we wanna go.

(47:35):
stop being the victim of yourenvironment, which is exactly
what every book has told us inthe past, right?
Yeah.
Take responsibility and use thetools that you have, like
meditation, like atomic habits,and however you can get yourself
out of that rote dependency onthe past.
that's how you're going to moveforward into the future.

(47:57):
So it isn't so much about that'sit.
there's the period end of story.
It's how do we do it and how dowe tap into maybe that quantum
piece of it?
And how do we help our brains,get to the point where we're
able to like unc unclench ourasshole and not think about
going to the gym every day andjust go to the gym every day?
I think that's where themeditation part comes in, where

(48:19):
I'm not plugged into the past,I'm plugged into what I want and
aligning my values with myactions.
Where my value right now is Iwanna be fit.
I don't wanna be a lazy slug whogets outta breath when they walk
up the stairs.
that's my value, and I need toalign my actions with that
value.
And I can't be like, oh, I havea bad knee.

(48:40):
All right.
figure a way around it.
tap into what you have.
That's what you were doing

Sarah (48:45):
last week when you were working a lot, huh?

Chris (48:47):
Yeah.
Yeah.
I was, I was tapping into theold rote way of how to get a
little bit of satisfaction outtamy life.
this feels nice.
This is like putting on a nice,Ooh, I didn't even think about
that, but holy shit.
if you want a good example,that's why I worked like that.
'cause I get a little hit atdopamine when someone's look how

(49:09):
hard you work.
Look at you staying up allnight.
Aren't you a special prettylittle princess where that's
not, but then doesn't, isn'tthat like

Sarah (49:16):
you chose to change your value there for a little while?
Yeah.
inadvertently

Chris (49:21):
looking at aligning actions and values is, it's
complicated, right?
Like I was able to get away withit, get away with it in my.
I'm like, no, I'm helping.
I'm helping the team.
This has to be done.
It has to be done right.
So I think on some level thatI'm aligning my values with my
actions, right?
there's some little nugget forme to like n nibble on.

(49:42):
I'm like, no.
What I'm doing is perfectlyvalid, but really what I'm doing
is just falling back into oldbehaviors because they're giving
me the same little bit ofdopamine that I would get, when
I was doing that on the regular.
Do you know what I mean?
and then looking at your advice,looking at the therapist's
advice, looking at your dad'sadvice, listening to David and
Olivia.

(50:02):
I'm like, yeah, this isn't.
These actions don't align withmy values.
So make a change.
Don't stop being the victim ofyour environment and figure a
way forward through whatever itis that is causing this.
You don't need to be the hero.
No one gives a shit about you.
Let turn it over to your team,delegate your author and get
your shit lined up with you.
get your actions lined up withyour values.

Sarah (50:24):
So is that what's happened in the last week?

Chris (50:26):
Yeah.
Were you

Sarah (50:27):
able to do that?

Chris (50:28):
Yeah, and that's what I was talking about when I
understand that this isn't the,this isn't the way, to a healthy
lifestyle.
This isn't the way to be theperson that I want to be, which
is a chill, relaxed person who'sable to address a crisis when it
comes up.
This is me just, gutting out thework and, Not being the, being

(50:50):
smart about what we're doing.
This is me just taking like theeasy path and the one that,
that's gonna get me a lot ofkudos.
and being able to recognize thatand say, all right, that this
isn't right.
I can still do what we need todo, which is help the team.
But the way to do that is todelegate, is to line up
resources to make things workand put some things in place.

(51:11):
And that just took a little bitof time.
So now that you've done thatYou're feeling better.
Yeah.
I feel amazing, I feel.
But did you do or did you finishyour project?
the project's not technicallyover, we just got through like
one of the hard parts.
But some of the work that, thatwent into getting us over the
hard part will, will lend itselfto.

(51:33):
turning that over to the teamand doing things the right way.
If we hadn't had that hurdle, ifwe hadn't had that deliverable,
then then it would've beenharder to mark a spot where we
would, where I would turn itover.
Do you know what I mean?
But that deliverable made theline in the sand easier to draw
for me and for the rest of theteam.

(51:55):
Hey, I'm gonna get us up tohere.
I'm gonna give you guys toolsand then I'm out.
I think that's where, is now
where,
yeah.
And I think that's a really goodexample of not being the victim
of my environment.
I could have continued saying,woe is me.
This project is so hard.
But instead I decided that Ididn't like that I don't like
not sleeping, I don't like, Ilike it in the way that

(52:16):
everyone's oh, but I don't likethat enough.
that isn't my value.
That's not gonna be my jam.
I would rather have a nice, calmexistence.
And are you sleeping better?
Yeah, like a fucking baby.
There we go.

Sarah (52:29):
Good.
Sleeping in like a baby is myfavorite.

Chris (52:32):
yes.
And I'm not, I am not constantlylooking for the next hit of
caffeine.
So also good.
Oh, that's good.
Yeah.
Becca, just write that down.
So I think that is an excellentillustration, even though I
didn't plan to get into that,but lining up your actions with
your values and being able tofocus on who you want to be

(52:53):
versus who you were in the past.
that is a hundred percent whatthis chapter's about.

Sarah (52:57):
So it's about the same shit we read about before,

Chris (53:00):
but with the idea that there is the possibility that
you're gonna be able to tap intosome like subatomic process.
So these are subatomic habits.
Mic drop.
We're done.

Sarah (53:12):
I feel like we talked about all of it.
But we will keep going becauselike I said before, yeah.
I wanna get to the end of thisbook.
I wanna get to part three.
And I just had a bad, weakreading,

Chris (53:20):
wrote love.
Yeah.
I think looking at, this is thebeginning, begin to shape your
inner world without relying onexternal validation.
stop leaning on the past.
Stop, looking for somebody totell you that you're doing a
good job, Christine.
'cause no one really cares.
stop being the victim and decideon a future.
Focus on it.

(53:41):
And don't be deterred.
by doing the Don't be deterred.
Don't be deterred.
don't fall into the trap ofwrapping that warm fuzzy robe
around you because you've wornit for so long.
Me too.
Me too.
if there was anything nicer thandoing programming at three
o'clock in the morning and beingall blurry eyed and being able
to like, ugh.
Just stay it up all night again,fuzzy robe of comfort for me

(54:03):
where I don't have to think toohard or delegate or, figure any
hard problems out.
I can just code pussy can justcode

Sarah (54:09):
to tell everybody about it the next day.

Chris (54:12):
But it gigantic vagina.
I am right.
So do the hard thing again.
It's supposed to be hard.
Like it wasn't the easiest thingand it wasn't the quickest thing
to be able to turn that workover.
And I know everyone wasfrustrated and I was frustrated
with myself that it took as longas it did.
but

Sarah (54:27):
you got her done.
It ended up being a greatintertwining of things today, so
it worked out well.
Yeah.
I think that's all so itbenefited me, which is all I
ever looked for.

Chris (54:36):
We talked about the Pope, we got, bonfires of, choices.
Yeah.
That,
there you go.
Another big thing of this chapter is your personality
creates your personal reality.
if you, you are negative.
If you are, and I'm not sayinglike Ted lasso over the top
positive, what I am saying isthink about being that person

(54:57):
who looks forward, think aboutbeing the person that solves the
problem.
Think about being the personthat is looking for something
different.
and if you can align thatpersonality, if you can get
those neurons firing at the sametime, you're making good
choices, then that's how you getto UNC Unclench your butt hole.

Sarah (55:14):
I love it.
I love UNC Unclenching, mybutthole there.
And I love the fact that you'reprobably going to carry us
through this whole book, but wedo have a little bit of a break
because next week we are goingto be interviewing Lynn Harris,
the first like real celebrity tobe on the podcast.

Chris (55:30):
Great.
We're big time.
She's legit folks.

Sarah (55:31):
She's legit.
She's a legit like realcelebrity Googler.
She has a fucking Wikipediapage.
I don't know if I mentioned itlast week.
I'm gonna mention it until it,until it airs, until it drops,
until we release it.
Whatever.
So that's what we get to do nextweek.
Yay.
Yay.
I'm gonna keep reading because Ilove this book.
Awesome.
I think that's so funny'causelast week you really didn't love

(55:51):
this book.

Chris (55:53):
No, I was annoyed.
I was like this fucking whackjob.
But I can see how maybe takinganother step in this journey is
where we're supposed to go.
I think it might have to do withme also being just a little bit
more chill and getting somesleep.
is that what you didn't let

Sarah (56:08):
them too?
Because that may be because Iwas like.
You really hated that one,

Chris (56:13):
and I don't think you really hated it.
'cause it's all the same shit.
it's all the same shit.
Awesome.
All right.
I am going to, I'm gonna hang upbecause I'm, I gotta go to, I
gotta go to yoga again.

Sarah (56:22):
Oh, that's right.
Okay.
Sounds good.
Love you.
Bye.
Namaste.
That too.