Episode 53: BJJ - It's Not an Extra J - The Mental Funny Bone

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Sarah (00:02):
Welcome to The Mental Funny Bone, a podcast where
mental health meets humor andheart and a healthy dose of
laughter.
I'm not doing the whole thing'cause I already screwed it up.
So welcome to the Mental FunnyBone.

Chris (00:13):
Here

Sarah (00:13):
we are, we're gonna talk about funny shit.
Today is we're going a littleoff script that would make it
sound like we actually have ascript sometimes, but we
actually don't ever,

Chris (00:22):
we have a general outline.
Yeah, sometimes

Sarah (00:25):
today, I actually have probably a better outline for
today's episode than I have forany other episode we've done.
But today we're gonna do acatchup episode because we
haven't been able to record anormal episode for a while.
Um, may kind of got away fromus.

Chris (00:41):
Where did it go?

Sarah (00:42):
Um, we did two interviews, which were two
fantastic interviews.
I love them so much, but wedon't wanna give you two
interviews in a row.
So we need to, we need to throwjust normal at you, but we also
haven't recorded in so long, sowe have a bunch of shit we wanna
talk about.
So that's all we're gonna dotoday.
We're not focusing on the book,we're not doing that.

(01:02):
We're focusing on us and what wehave been doing.
And that's

Chris (01:05):
it.
That's amazing.
Are you going to, are you gonnastart because I feel unprepared.
Do you want

Sarah (01:11):
me to start?
I don't know.
I feel like we should talk aboutNaked Cats again.
I feel like that was wastedwhile we weren't recording.

Chris (01:19):
So, well actually, I'll just start, but I'm not gonna
start with Naked Cats.
I'm gonna start with Juujitsubecause my brain went from naked
Cats and talking about Facebookreels to, what was the last
episode we recorded where wedidn't talk, we didn't do an
interview.
Um, and I was like, was itsomething about the Pope?
And then it was like JD Vance.

(01:40):
I.
Yeah.
The pope, the statues.
Yeah.
The, um, how JD Vance killed thePope.
I was like, was that it?
I'm like, no.
There was one after that.
And then I thought about howthe, we got a new Pope since
then, and I thought that wouldtake a little bit longer.
Yeah.
Have we, we have, we haven'ttalked about the, have we talked
about the new Pope?
I don't know.
I don't think so.
I don't think so.
But we got a new Pope and yourmom, your mom, knowing how much

(02:03):
we love the Pope saga.
Mm-hmm.
Texted you first I think, andsaid We got a, we got a new Pope
and when she didn't get animmediate response, then she
texted me.
Say she was calling,

Sarah (02:15):
she was calling, this wasn't even text, she called,
this wasn't even text.
Oh, these were messages.
These were phone.
Yeah.
Oh, wow.
Mm-hmm.
Right.
But in ion, we talk about thisalready, but I think that maybe
it's just, I've told the storyto so many other people, so
let's just keep going.
If you've heard it before, justthere's a little button on
whatever device you're on, I'msure has a little, just skip,

(02:36):
skip little circle and it haslike a 25 in the center.
Just hit that a few times.
Yeah, you're fine.
Okay.
Go ahead.

Chris (02:43):
Plus, I'm pretty sure it wasn't that entertaining the
last time we told it.
Yeah.
Yeah.

Sarah (02:48):
So we should tell it again.

Chris (02:49):
I, I think the last time, what, what did we talk about?
We talked to, uh, did, had wegone to pick up Olivia yet?
Did we do that pilgrimage?
I think that we did.
I think that was the lastrecord.
The last record, record that wedid, like record ding,

Sarah (03:05):
record

Chris (03:06):
ding.
Oh yeah.
Then I do think

Sarah (03:08):
we talked about the Pope because that was happened the
day after we drove home fromLiv.

Chris (03:13):
Right.
'cause Olivia was there and uh,your mom was trying to get

Sarah (03:16):
in touch with her too.
Yeah.
She ended up calling Olivia, whoended up answering to tell us
that there was white smoke.
Yes.
This all sounds familiar now.

Chris (03:27):
Yes, a

Sarah (03:27):
hundred

Chris (03:27):
percent.
Okay, good.
I'm glad.
Um, do you wanna tell us aboutJiujitsu?
Yes.
Back to that story.
One day while I was cleaning myown home.
Which I don't, I don't do ever,but for some reason I needed to
clean my own home anyway, I wascleaning and I decided that I
needed to sit down and look upjujitsu places because my, my

(03:51):
friend Jeanie, her husband doesJiujitsu.
Yeah.
And I was like, I gotta, I gottacheck that out.
I gotta check that out.
I gotta, I gotta look at that.
And as I was looking at it, Iwas like, I think this is
something that I could still doat 50 ish.
Yeah.
Two-ish.
And I was like, I wonder, youknow, maybe that would be, maybe

(04:13):
that would be something to kindof keep me occupied.
It would be, it would be a wayto like, you know, move away
from focusing so much on worklike I have been the past couple
of months and a hobby outsideof, uh, outside of the house
where I have to go there.
You know, something that I'm notreally good at.
Like, because you, you havemastered

Sarah (04:31):
yoga, so you needed to move on.

Chris (04:33):
Well, it's not a mastering the yoga, it's just
being, it's being bored with theyoga.
It's just being a DA and beinglike, I could still do yoga.
I'm not cheating on yoga.
Right.
I'm not, but I could also trythis jujitsu, because it seems,
it seems fun and it, it, itturns out that they'll give you
like a whole list of places youcan go.

(04:54):
There's one, you know, fairlyclose and on a whim because, uh,
A DHD also, uh, struggles withimpulse control.
So I was like, oh, I'm justgonna email him right now
because, you know, we've talkedabout how good I am at emailing
people and in, so I just emailedthe guy and I'm like, Hey, I'm
kind of interested.
I am, I'm way too old.

(05:16):
I am way too slow.
I'm not flexible.
He was like, great, you soundperfect.
Do you wanna try a class outtomorrow?
And I was like, well, well now,now I'm kind of committed.
Should have thought of that.
Right?
I'm like, I, well, I can't.
Push out now and say, no, Idon't, nevermind.
That was just a procrastinationtactic'cause I didn't wanna

(05:37):
clean the toilet.
Mm-hmm.
So he's like, oh, I'm, it's,it'll be so exciting to have you
in class.
Here's the schedule.
Just pick one of these.
The, where there's one tomorrow,there's one Wednesday.
So, um, so I went to the, thejujitsu.
You know how, you know how whenyou're gonna do something for
the first time and you're, it,it seems, it seems like a good

(06:01):
idea, but you're by yourselfnow.
Mm-hmm.
And, uh, and you have to go from the car to the place.
Yeah.
And, and then you're sitting inthe car and you're thinking
about all the reasons why, youknow, perhaps this isn't a good
idea.
Yeah.
Like, what if they're gonnalaugh at me?
What I'm, what I'm gettingRight.
Don't fit in here.
Don't you have the

Sarah (06:20):
impulse, a DH, ADHD impulse at this point?
'cause it could just

Chris (06:23):
impulse you right out of the car.
Right, right.
Where does that go?
When, when the A DHD anxietyturns up?
Yeah, it
just opens the door and lets it in.
Come on in.
Yeah.
I'll be over here.
Uh, yeah.
I'll, when you guys are done,I'll come back.
Stupid impulse.
So, uh, like I walk in and, uh,the Travis, thank you Travis.

(06:45):
I appreciate you greeting me.
He's like, you must beChristine.
I was like, is it because I lookold?
He was like, you're going needAgh.
And I was like, A what?
Now?
Like, you know what Agh is, butyou know, it, it still sounds
stupid.
Like I understand why we call itthat, but why don't we just call
it pajamas?

Sarah (07:04):
Isn't gee clarified butter too?
Yes.
Okay.

Chris (07:08):
More

Sarah (07:08):
delicious than what this guy handed me.
I knew it sounded familiar forsomething else.

Chris (07:13):
So he's like, we have, we have extras here, and he hands
me, he hands me the marshal artspajamas.
Yeah.
In a belt and he is like, Hey,the women's changing room is in
the back.
And I can already tell likethere are no rooms back there
except for like a closet.
Yeah, there's like a closet.
It's the women's changing room.

(07:34):
It is stacked.
You remember the

Sarah (07:34):
women's changing room at the TaeKwonDo studio in Arizona?
Right.
Okay.

Chris (07:38):
Not until I walked into this changing room.
Right.
And I'm like, right, this, thatfeels like a closet that doesn't
actually have a door.
Yeah.
This is, this is, yep.
Yep.
Here we are.
Um, there's no lock.
I'm hoping like, and then itoccurs to me like there's no
girls here.
It smells so bad.
There are no girls here ever.

(08:00):
Like, it stinks, like, yeah.
Sweat and boys and fear andaggression, all of it.
Yes.
So I put on, uh, I put on mything and, uh, do you know how
like, uh, ours from TaeKwonDo,they had like a little tie on
the one side so you could atleast like secure the one part?
Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
So the
other part, no, no, these don't have that.

(08:20):
You just, you, it's like a robeand then you gotta, then you
gotta

Sarah (08:24):
tie the tie.
Wait, so it doesn't even tie onthe outside.
Like your tie is literally your,your belt right.
Is literally just holding itoff.
The

Chris (08:32):
only, the only thing keeping this, do you know what

Sarah (08:34):
would happen with that?
Like, I mean, I can just see,just, it's all boob, it's all
sports bra.
Like, it gets better,

Chris (08:40):
it gets better.
So they give me, they give methe smallest size that they have
for grownups.
Yeah.

Sarah (08:47):
So I put that on is probably very large on you
because you're just a tinylittle girl.

Chris (08:52):
Just a speck of dust.
Can I get a kid extra?
Sam, do you, do you guys have,like, do you, so you know, you,
and then I have to tie the beltand the belt.
Everything is big and the beltis like, I'm like, whew.
Wrapping that thing aroundmyself like 15 times.
And then trying to rememberright over left.

(09:12):
Left over, right.
Yeah.
Something has to tuck under.
'cause I have all this stuff.
Um, and then, uh, I walk out andthey're like, oh yeah, no, it's
fine.
It's fine.
We'll, we'll, you know, you cantell us what you want and, uh,
we'll order you one if you wannastick with it.
I want something that fits me.
Thank you.
I'm like, do you have anythinglike for kids?
They, they're like, that ladiesare kind of like a weird size.

(09:35):
I was like, is it because of theboobs?
Yeah.
And he was like, I don't knowanything about that.
Okay.
And I was like,
oh, okay.
We're not gonna talk about theboob.
All right, fair enough.
Your boobs do not exist.
We just ignore them.
Right.
I mean, not that everyone isn'tgrabbing them 15 minutes later,
but Cool.
All right.
We won't talk about them anyway.
So we start this warmup and, uh,no one tells me anything.

(09:57):
No one, no one says, Hey,welcome to Jiujitsu.
The purpose of Jiujitsu is tohurt the other person bad enough
where they tap you and ask youto stop hurting them.
I was like, no, no, no onementions it.
No one mentions it.
And then we start, we startrunning fucking laps around.

Sarah (10:14):
That's the worst.
That's the worst.
Go ahead.
This is great.
This is great.

Chris (10:19):
It's much longer than I intended it to be.
Mm-hmm.
But we're running laps aroundthe thing and um, for some
reason they let me stand where Ihave to lead the lap running.
And I am like, prancing, likethe Pink Pony Club.
Right.
I'm wearing this thing thatdoesn't fit.
My belt is not tied.
Right.
And like my heart is, is goingso fast.

(10:43):
Why,
why do they have you leading?
Like, I have to say, it's,

Sarah (10:47):
I don't understand these places.
I don't understand these places.
Like, do the people, I guess thepeople who own them, like just
don't have that anxiety bone.
I don't like, they don't like,do you know it?
They're the definition of notgiving a fuck.
These are

Chris (11:01):
like the honey badgers of group activities.
Yeah, they're, yeah.
Like meanwhile, like they'reright.
I'm sweating

Chris (2) (11:08):
hives.

Chris (11:09):
Hives like, and I'm doing what we do and I like, I'm like,
Hey you guys, I'm gonna pullover and let the young kids go
fuck idiots.
Now I'm telling dad jokes, theinsurance guy come out.
Right?
That's all I can hear in my headis that guy with that fucking

(11:30):
mustache saying how I'm turninginto my parents when like,
everyone in this class is atleast a decade younger than me.
Do you remember Bruce who tookTaeKwonDo classes with us?
Yeah.
He was like 90.
Right?
That's what I feel like.
That's what I feel like.
He was the best all I could see.

(11:51):
His cute, his face, I, he wasthe best punching.
He just picked his leg.
I loved it.
He was fucking pass.
Little bit, little bit.
I mean, showed up to class
all the time.
Yeah.
He loved it.
Right.
So now, now we have to do thewarmup and I, my impulse control
should have then the next daykind of led me to maybe look

(12:12):
something up on Jiujitsu.
Yeah.
'cause they're like, becausetossed around words.
And when I first went toCrossFit, I did a significant
amount of research on CrossFit.
So I knew the words.
They're like, all right, forwardroles.
And I was like, okay, forwardroles.
And I like put my little handsdown.

Chris (2) (12:30):
I would do a, like, I could see a little

Chris (12:33):
gymnastics again.
I'm first, I don't know how it,why like I pulled over and I'm
looking around like maybesomeone will be like, do you
need help?
Do you know what you're doing?
Right.
No, they just let me go and I'mlike, and I flop over like a
fish and land on my back.
And then I look over at the, atthe 10-year-old boy next to me,

(12:56):
and he is got his shouldertucked and he, and he, he does
his flip and he jumps up likehe's ready to fight fucking
Spider-Man.
And I'm laying there on my backlike a turtle.
Like a turtle.
All right.
So we get through, we getthrough warmups and it now, now
we have to, now we have to do,now we have to do things.
And this motherfucker asks for avolunteer, right?

(13:18):
Like I, there are Why would youvolunteer?
I didn't.
Okay.
I didn't, I swear I did not.
And like, but I'm like lookingdown and, um, yeah, not paying
attention.
And then the next thing I hearis this wham.
Wham.
I was like, what is happening?
I guess the, and no one tellsyou, but there's, there's, get

(13:41):
that dick outta your mouth.
You saw me put it in.
There's a certain way thatyou're supposed to fall, but no
one told me how you're supposedto fall.
No.
You like, you're, you'resupposed to like, uh, prevent a
concussion.
So, you know, like, wanna tuckyour head and then you wanna
like, slam with your hands.
Okay.
Like, I don't know why, becauseit just feels dramatic.

(14:02):
Mm-hmm.
Like, why don't, like, am I justmaking noise to let people know
to get out of the way?
Or was this whole sport foundedby a bunch of like Korean drama
queens?
I don't, I don't know.
Brazilian drama queens,whatever.

Chris (2) (14:16):
Is that what Jisu Jisu is?

Chris (14:19):
It's BJ J is how you, uh, is how you abbreviate it.
Needs.
And once again, I can't Are youchoking on that penis?
Oh my God, you are.
Spit it out.
Spit it out.

(14:41):
Right.
B jj, nobody
needs an extra tray.
I was like, I can, thisactually, we could end the
podcast right now'cause this is,we're good.
Fucking freaking hilarious,honestly, like, but what is BJJ
stand for?
Brazilian

(15:01):
Jiujitsu also Juujitsu.
Whenever you say it, Noah.
Noah
is checking on me to make sureI'm okay.
Yeah, I just, that's choked on adick.
Choked on a gummy dick.
On a bj,

Chris (2) (15:13):
no, not on a bj, a gummy Dick BJJ was mentioned and
then she choked on a dick.
She

Sarah (15:19):
said b jj.
And that I choked on the gummypenis.

Chris (2) (15:23):
Because they taste good.

Chris (15:32):
Oh my God.
This
is, this is so funny.
So funny.
Listen, and nothing I have in myscript for the day is

Sarah (15:39):
even like, nothing I have is funny.
So,

Chris (2) (15:44):
hey.
Okay, so what does B JJ standfor again?
Brazilian Juujitsu.
The juj, it's two js, that's thesecond J.
Okay.
Juujitsu jujitsu.
So it's, it's two js.
Okay.
B-J-J-B-H

Chris (16:02):
aj.
Right.
Um, so again, no, there's no,there's no like note card to
tell you anything.
Um, so this guy falls, he's whamand I'm like, I don't.
Can I, maybe I can opt out ofthe falling down part.
And then the instructor isgiving you, uh, we're doing

(16:22):
drills, right?
So he's telling you how to, howto get somebody to submit and
that he starts out on his back,like picture it.
He's on his back and he puts hislegs up in the air.
And then the other guy like,wiggles up in there and then he
closes his legs around thisother guy and I'm like, I, you
know, I'm so thankful I didn'tgo with you.

(16:44):
Can you imagine?
No, no.
We would've been a disaster.
'cause I was like, I don't knowabout all this
and I'm nervous.
Just say, wiggles up in thereagain.
He does.
He's like, he just wiggles up inthere so their hips are
touching.
And I'm like, you won't, we'renot allowed to talk about how my

(17:06):
boobs don't fit in this pajamatop, but you are.
Touching wieners with that guy.
You were at the ballet.
It's so weird.
I mean, alright, so that is,that's called something like
the, the one of these is aguard.

(17:27):
And I, I can't remember becauseevery time I go to look it up,
I'm like, and then he wiggled upin there and locked his legs.
So this guy, this guy is like,all right, well I'm gonna grab
a, and I am used to TaeKwonDo,like, I wanna move quick and
stay away from you and I justwanna bump you on the chest and
get a point.
Yeah.
This guy is like, well, youknow, we're gonna, we're gonna

(17:48):
manage the space between us, andif you can manage the space
between the two of you, then youcan win.
So he latches onto this guy'spajama top, and now it is
abundantly clear why we don'tbother tying these things
because it, because he just, helatches onto that and like,
pulls this guy and this guy'slike a, a pretty, pretty good at
Jiujitsu himself.

(18:08):
So he like throws himself like,and now I don't see what's
happening anymore because thesetwo are just.
Wrestling.
And then Chad, Chad, I loveChad's, the, the other coach.
And Chad's like, all right,well, we're gonna put him in the
shoulder of justice.
I said, you stop it right now.
You stop making things up.
Are you guys making fun of me?

(18:28):
Is that what this is?
Is this a prank?
Is this a prank?
All new people have to gothrough?
Is this, are you fucking withme?
That's what's happening.
I, I was
like, are you guys fucking with me?
Is shoulder justice a thing?
Like you can tell me like I'mgonna, any of this gonna good
spirited about it.
Is any of this a thing?
Like is I feel like everythingis a joke.
Right?
Right.
Hilarious.

(18:49):
Hilarious.
So we do the shoulder a justice,and I guess, and this is when
finally somebody explainedsomething to me, he is like,
yeah, what you're trying to dois cut off the blood supply to
the brain.
I was like, what?
I.
He was like, yeah, you wanna getyour thumb, take your thumb and
put it right on their carotidartery and then do the same

(19:10):
thing on the other side.
I was like,

Sarah (19:14):
no, no, no, it's

Chris (19:15):
okay.
And then when someone does thatto you and you feel funny, tap
out.
I was like, no, I'm gonna tapout right now.
I'm tapping.
I don't like it.
I tap.

Sarah (19:26):
I don't like it.
Don't like it.
So like they come at you and I'mtapping.

Chris (19:29):
Oh,
oh.
You stay over there.
So now, uh, we do, we do thedrills and I'm terrible at it.
And then we're gonna, we'regonna roll.
I was like, what is this?
So sparring in Juujitsu isrolling.
We're rolling.
Like, someone will come up toyou and be like, would you like
to roll?
And I was like, I like, let'sroll.
Right?
I, I just see you guys rollingaround like panda bears, right?

(19:50):
Right.
Yes.
This is exactly what it lookslike when I do it.
It looks like one of those pillbugs.
Like I just fold up and.
That's what, that's what itlooks like now.
Everyone else, like the boys arelike throwing their legs up over
top of people.
And I'm, and I'm like, well, Ihave, I have both dinosaur arms
and dinosaur legs.

(20:11):
Like I am not, I don't know howlong your arms are, but mine, I
am not gonna be able to do thatever.
Like, unless you're stretchingthem at some point.
Cool.
So it turns out there's one, oneother middle aged, well young.
Okay.
There's one other 20-year-oldgirl, Angie, and she's married

(20:31):
to Chad, so she's been doingJiujitsu for, uh, ever and a
day.
Yeah.
But Angie and I have the samekind of a DHD.
Yeah.
So we spend a lot of timegiggling.
Yeah.
Which is sort of the savinggrace and thank God.
And then Angie will forget thatI don't know what I'm doing.

(20:53):
And like wham Yeah.
Whi me to the, to the carpet.
Um, which is fun.
And I'm like, okay, well how didyou do that?
And she's like, I don'tremember.
Yeah.
That's, that's like Chad
will, like, Chad will go like, he's like, all right, it's
the shoulder destiny and thenthe arms shrug of paradise and
the left chicken wing of death.
I'm like, I don't who leftchicken wing death.

(21:14):
I don't.
You guys are, you're definitelymaking shit up.
I don't know.
And my brain at that point ofthe day, will hold one thing,
not even one thing.
And he is like, all right,shoulder, arm goes here.
And then I forget what this armdoes.
So I am constantly like lookingaround the class while holding
onto Angie's shoulder.

(21:35):
Yeah.
Like that, like, like a, likewe're dancing and she's like, I
don't remember what to do.
I'm like, you've been doingalright.
That's okay.
But she'll call Chad over andthen Chad will go through it
with us real fast and then he'llleave again.
And I'm like, can you call himagain?

Sarah (21:50):
I still don't understand.
Can

Chris (21:52):
you, can you get him to come back?
Show him your boobs?
I feel like you're showing boobsanyway.
It doesn't matter.
Oh my God, yes.
There's nothing but bellyhanging out everywhere.
Anyways, Angie and I spar for alittle while and she's like, oh,
you can roll with PaisleyPaisley.
Paisley's 12.
Yeah, Paisley's 12.
Um, her dad, Tim also takesclasses.

(22:12):
Mm-hmm.
So I don't know anything at allat this point other than
Shoulder of Destiny, which I'mnever gonna be able to do
because it takes more than this.
So Paisley on the other hand,competes.
And she is a higher, she's ahigher belt than, yeah, of
course.
So Paisley comes over and grabsme by the shirt and then pulls
me down to the groundimmediately onto my knees, and

(22:35):
then does a flip where she putsher legs around my neck.
Oh.
And then I had just have toimmediately tap out.
And then Tim, her dad is like,put up a little bit more fight
than that.
She's 12.
She still sleeps with anightlight.
And I was like, Tim, I sleepwith a nightlight.
So that's that.

(22:56):
And then that was like the endof, uh, that was the end of that
class.
And the point of this wholestory is there's a couple old
guys and I'm talking to the oldguys and I'm like, hi, I am
Chris.
'cause at this point, Paisleyhas tossed me to the ground.
I've shown everyone my boobs,everyone knows I'm an idiot who
will joke around.
And uh, so now I feel okay.
Yeah.

(23:16):
And I'm like, oh, hey, this isMike.
This is Mark.
I was like, oh, like Apostles.
And the one guy's like, there'sno mark, there's no Mike
Apostle.
And I was like, huh,interesting.
And he's like, that's funny.
And Tim, who has wild a DH, likeactually nobody in this class
doesn't have a DH adhd.
Yeah.
I offered to pass out Ritalinthe other day.

(23:37):
Yeah.
I was like, could I get, youguys are making me crazy.
Tim says, oh, that's funny.
'cause that's Father Mike.
I was like, you are fucking withme again.
Shoulder a destiny Father Mike.
I'm like, come on guys.
That's enough of the initiation.
Yeah.
Enough enough.
No, no.
Father Mike is actually, he'slike, no, I'm actually a
Catholic priest.
And I was like, nice.

(23:57):
Oh, congratulations on the Pope.
Right.
Uh, I hear he got a new boss.
Yeah.
There's no mic apostle.
I mean, there could be, I feellike there should be.
There's Archangel Saint Michael.
Right.
We went to his school.
I was like, there's a micsomewhere.

(24:17):
Yeah.
In,

Sarah (24:18):
in the Bible.

Chris (24:20):
And then, uh, they were, they were telling me that this
other guy is the old guy.
And I was like, great.
How old are you?
48, 4.

Sarah (24:28):
Yeah.
Yeah.
But you'll go back like you, youare, yeah.
You're like a juujitsu person.
Now,

Chris (24:34):
I don't know that I'm ever gonna be a Juujitsu person,
but I will go back and I thinkit'll be fun once I figure out
what I'm doing there.
Yeah.
Right.
Like, and so the second time I'mlike, Hey, it, I don't wanna, I
don't wanna interrupt anyone'sflow, but can you just tell me
what I'm supposed to be doing?
And Chad's like, yeah, get, getpast my guard.
I was like, how?

Sarah (24:56):
Yeah.
This is what I don't like.
I don't understand why like, youjust get thrown in.
Like, shouldn't there?
I don't.
I,

Chris (25:03):
it's, and then, then there was another new guy who
showed up yesterday and I waslike, thank God, someone who's
newer than me, this guy, it washis first jujitsu class, but he
must have wrestled in highschool.
Yeah.
So he is definitely just, uh,just in it to win it.
And I am still afraid of hurtingPaisley, so I don't like this
guy.
Like, he's like gouging Chad inthe eyes.

(25:25):
Yeah.
I think that's where like thewhole

Sarah (25:28):
cutting off the blood to the brain, I think that's where
I would've checked out.

Chris (25:31):
Well, and no one will do it to me because Angie won't,
Angie won't risk getting hurtand, uh, Paisley's 12.
So she would rather just wrestleher dad.
She's like, I'm gonna go partnerup with my dad.
I'm like, seems like a betteridea.
Cool.
Yeah.
How much do you pay for this?
It's really cheap.
Okay.
I paid$10 for three, uh, threeclasses.

(25:53):
Oh, that's great.
Yeah.
But I also had to buy thepajamas.
It's not like, do you rememberwhen we bought our, uh, pajamas
at TaeKwonDo?
Mm-hmm.
And they were like, the patchgoes here.
Yeah, these go up the sleeve,but only here.
Yeah.
And it has to be within a nine.
There were measurements.
Yeah.
They were like, what do you wanton it?

(26:13):
I was like, what?
Pink
glitter.
I was like, do you have any with unicorns?

Sarah (26:21):
I would like rainbows and glitter, please.
That would make me happy.
Maybe throw a butterfly onthere.

Chris (26:26):
And then Father Mike is standing next to me and he's
like, yeah, I bought my ownembroidery machine.
I was like, what did you put onyours?
And he's like, devil's.
I was like, well.
Alright, cool.
And he, I was like, well, I'mgonna see, and he showed me his
amor machine and I was like, Imeant the devils, but cool.
Yeah.
There it is.
Yeah.

Sarah (26:47):
Wow.
Wow.

Chris (26:48):
Right.
And uh, Chad's like, here's thisone is a snake.
There's no rules about what Ican have on my, I feel like this
is much

Sarah (26:55):
better.
Like, I, I like this, I likethat part of it.

Chris (26:58):
It is wild.
I'm like, so what should I get,get, do you take a marker to it?
They don't give a shit.
Like, it doesn't matter.
Like one kid showed up in like ablue one and the other kids got
like a black one with red shiton it.
I got a black one with black onit.
'cause I, you know, eventuallyI'm gonna have like rainbows and
mm-hmm.
Like flowers and stuff online.

(27:19):
I want you to bedazzle it.
My god.

Sarah (27:23):
With

Chris (27:23):
little rhinestones

Sarah (27:24):
on it.
Yeah.
I'm gonna buy a bedazzler justso we can bedazzle your ghee.

Chris (27:29):
Listen, you also would've been so proud of me because it
took me all three lessons beforeI mentioned that I already had a
black belt and something else.
Wow.
I'm very proud of you for that.
And even then I knew, I mean,nobody cared.

Sarah (27:44):
Yeah, that's good.
Nobody cared.
I.
I'm just proud of you for going'cause I wouldn't, I wouldn't
have done it.
Like everything you've justsaid, especially at the
beginning, it hurts.
Why am I first?
Yeah, no.

Chris (27:56):
And laying there on my back like a turtle.

Sarah (27:58):
Yeah.

Chris (27:59):
And everything I do is completely wrong and makes it
worse for me than before.
Chad was like, get get past myguard.
And I was like, well, quitmoving.
Why would you tell me to getpast your legs and then wiggle
around like that?
He is like, no, no, no.
You wanna immobilize my legs?
And he's like, you get down.
So he grabs my one foot and pinsmy other foot with it.

(28:22):
So now I can't move my feet.
And he is like, all right, situp.
And then I go to sit up and hegrabs my shirt and pulls it down
and he is like, alright, really?
He's like, let me just get youinto side hustle or whatever it
is.
I'm tired, I'm gonna, right.
That is the other thing, like, Ilike for the, for the first time
yesterday, like I felt like Iknew enough where I could like

(28:42):
actually try to really roll andI made it, uh, two minutes and
30 seconds and I was like, Ihave to lay.
I give up.
I'm gonna tap out because I, I'mgonna die

Sarah (28:53):
tired.

Chris (28:53):
I came home and I was shaking'cause I hadn't eaten
enough.
Like, oh yeah.
I was like, this the fuck ishappening.
You're just rolling around onthe ground.

Sarah (29:03):
Yeah.
That takes, I mean,

Chris (29:05):
think it's like a real sport though.

Sarah (29:08):
There

Chris (29:08):
you go.
There's a half an hour thatwe'll have to have Becca cut
down.
You wanna just start again?
I think it,

Sarah (29:13):
I think it's mostly gold.
I think that's wonderful.
I choked on a dip for Christ'ssake.

Chris (29:18):
But yeah, I mean, it is a, it is, it is wild.
And I have, I have no idea whatI'm doing.
Um, I'm having a ton of fun andevery time I walk in I'm like, I
don't belong here.
I don't belong here.
Don't belong here.
And you still do.
Like, that's the big thing.
And I'm like, fuck that.
I, I'm gonna, I belong anywhereLike the second time.
Right.
The second time was the worst.

(29:38):
'cause I'd already, like, I'dalready used up my, I'm new
here.
Yeah.
And
as I was walking in, I'm like, you know what?
Fuck these motherfuckers.
I belong here.
Right.
I'm gonna walk in this door asif I am the baddest bitch that
ever walked in here.
And then I am gonna be funny ashell and everyone is gonna
freaking love me.
Yeah.

Sarah (29:57):
And then you open the door.

Chris (29:59):
And then I was like, why does it smell so bad?
My God.
What stinks.
Did someone leave their sweatygee,

Sarah (30:09):
like under a radiator?
It smells like at the deckhockey game when the whole team
runs past you at the same time.

Chris (30:18):
Well,

Sarah (30:20):
like, we're even outdoors.
Oh my Lord,

Chris (30:23):
look what is like, do you guys know?
It smells like I came out of theladies' dressing room and I was
like, do you guys know how badit smells in here?

Sarah (30:31):
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.

Chris (30:33):
They were like, yeah, we can't do anything about it.
That's just the way we smell.
And I was like, I brush my teethbefore I come here.
'cause I don't want, you know,I'm gonna be close to you.
I don't, I dunno.
Crazy.
All right, well, there, thereyou go.
That's what, that's what I havegoing on.
Just that I like it.
I like the Jiji too.
Just that and, uh, AI for A DHD,so I won't ruin it.

(30:54):
Uh, but there's a book out therecalled AI for A DHD and I used
the shit out of it today andprobably did.
Four things I'd been putting offfor five months.

Sarah (31:07):
Yay.

Chris (31:10):
And it justs kind.
That's what

Sarah (31:11):
it's about.

Chris (31:11):
It just kind of pushed me through the beginning part of
it.
And there you go.

Chris (2) (31:16):
There you go.
So it was awesome.

Sarah (31:17):
So, so check it out.
It's on Amazon, by Lindsay Schlike cola, but with an S.
Alright.
Um, what do you got your turn?
I'm done talking.
I don't have anything'cause Idon't, it's'cause I'm not,'cause
my shit's actually serious andI'm not sure the last time like
I was serious about anything

Chris (31:35):
before.
I know this is kind of rolereversal.
'cause the last time I was sortof whimsical and, and you were
serious was like a long, longtime ago I think.
Yeah.
Before we go Octane, MMA inMonongahela, if anyone is
interested in doing jiujitsu,they're nice, they're friendly.
Honestly, I, I kid around a lotabout how no one told me how to

(31:59):
do anything, but every time Istood around and looked like I
need to help somebody was like,tuck your shoulder, tuck your
head and flip over.

Sarah (32:06):
Talk

Chris (32:07):
flip, talk flip.
They're like, don't do that.
Don't do that.
Stretch your back out.
Everyone's just very nice.
And I think that I offended theold guys'cause I was like,
everyone here looks so young.
I'm so old.
And they were like, yeah, well,we're just old people.
And I was like, no, I don't meanyou.
No,

(32:27):
I don't.
Sir, I am older than you by adecade.
Sir, sir.
Father?

Sarah (32:34):
Um, I do.
So we should probably do alittle shout out for our fan
mail.
I can't remember the last timewe did that.
Kim sent us some pictures.
Mill Bishops and the OlandMills.
The Oland Mills pictures are myGod.
Unbelievable.
Have you seen the

Chris (32:50):
ones from Jamie Rudder?
No.
Did she send them?
She might have just texted themto me because I was like, why
are you and your sister dressedlike your mom?
Yeah, it's yeah.
Uhhuh, right?

Sarah (33:04):
Is that a blazer?
Rudder?
Right.
So, uh, so we had that and thenRudy sent us some, some
feedback.
Yeah.
He, he wanted to let us know.
They're definitely gummy dicks.
Good.
We got'em.
I got'em.
I got'em.
I actually had them.
I don't know how you forgetabout having gummy dicks, but,
but whatever.
And he wants to know if we'veever seen the movie Bad Parents.

(33:26):
I have not.

Chris (33:27):
I don't think so.
I on Netflix, I think this wasin my Disney, my Disney era.
Oh, kitty.
Yikes.
Sorry.
Cat knock and shout over.
I think it

Sarah (33:34):
might be on Netflix.
I might have to check it out.
Okay.
Next.
Shout out to Zol and design fortheir May Mental Health Month
social media posting, the MentalHealth Awareness Month Zen with
Zol and Designs where theyfeatured us.
So that was super cool.
So thanks Rick and uh, Julia whoput it together.
You guys are awesome.
And I also reached out to ourfriend all the way across the

(33:58):
country.
Misty.
Misty.
I haven't heard from her.
We haven't heard from her in awhile.
I'm not sure.
But Misty reached out to uslast.
Summer to let us know that, myGod, that we helped get her into
counseling or into therapy.
And it was, it's an email thatmade both of us cry.
That was wonderful.
Anyway, so I reached out to herto see how she was doing and,
and she's still doing therapy.

(34:19):
She's doing the hard things thateverybody should be doing.
That's awesome.
But she also shared with uspictures of her grand baby
Margot.
So cute.
And Margot is an awesome name,and I love the name.
And she's just so cute.
And the picture has the, youknow, the baby hands up by the
head slipping.
Oh, I surrender.
So, yay.
And she said she's stilllistening.

(34:40):
She's a little bit behind.
But aren't we all right?
We all are.
Okay.
So onto me, um, I bought, well,I bought a little coach training
thing that I've been working on.
I think I mentioned that alreadyin the last episode maybe.
Um, but I also joined a groupthat Mark Manson has recently

(35:02):
started, uh, with his newpodcast called Solved And what
it is, this is awesome.
It's called Mark Manson'sMomentum Program.
I don't know if it's calledthat.
It's called Momentum.
I think that sounds better thanMark Manson's Momentum Program.
I think I got, I got fancy here.

(35:22):
Anyway, I like,
maybe you should send that ideato him and be like, Hey, better
name.
No, I don't like it.
It's, I like momentum.
I like
momentum.
But basically he formed this,uh, because he, to get past the
fluff of all the self-care andall the self-help stuff.
Okay.
And actually put together agroup of people who want to make
changes and make those changes.

(35:43):
Small wins day by day.
So every month he takes, um, asubject and every day he and his
team will post on it and everymonth has a workbook.
You know, I love a goodworkbook.
Hate it so much every month.
I mean, you don't have to usethe workbook.
No, no.
But every month and you have alittle, uh, what's it called?

(36:04):
Assignment.
And you have to make a postunder, like, it's kind of like
facebooky kind of thing, but notreally.
Oh
yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, you answer it there and then other people read
your post and give you feedbackor say that they love it or just
give it a little heart or alittle clap and it goes on like
that.
So was it was shock you, it wasvalues.

(36:25):
So we worked on my God.
I worked on identifying valuesand I worked really hard on it,
and I, I love it so much.
I've identified some values, butI want, I don't want them to be
in the order that they're in.
So I have work to do becauseyour values can change, because
you can change your valuesbecause the way I live more so
goes with the value ofconnection and enjoyment at the

(36:47):
top.
So I just, that makes sense.
Wanna have fun?

Chris (36:51):
I wanna be connected to people and make them laugh.
That's me.

Sarah (36:54):
Yeah.
So I would like to change itaround.
And um, also in the top five waspurpose, empathy, and growth.
But what I, that's good.
I want growth to be the firstone.
I want that to be the, the thingthat I'm living by and focusing
on right now and purpose to havean impact.
'cause that's really what I,I've been trying to do.
That's why I started workingwith Michelle and, uh, trying to

(37:17):
identify.
You know, what I, what I shoulddo in life, um, because I, I
also wanna start a little sidehustle, but we'll get to that.
But back to values.
I want to share a story that wastold on the podcast.
So the podcast is Mark Manson,and Drew Bernie, I think is his
name.
Uh, he's Mark Manson's producerresearch, like, um, he's this

(37:40):
dude.
Yeah, he's, he's Mark Sky, andthey're fantastic.
And I, I love just listening tothem.
The podcast is actually fourplus hours, but he has it broken
down for the momentum stuff.
But if you wanna listen to it,you can listen to it for four
hours, if's a long time.
Like it's time.
I get antsy when we hit like anhour.
So some of the stuff I thoughtwas really cool.

(38:01):
Um, and I, I know that we'vetalked about it before, but not
to the depths that.
Like I actually had to work onit and we focused a lot on how
you need to gonna be trade offsin your values, and you have to
decide what you want to tradefor the value that you want.
And then we talked about howit's really insightful, like,

(38:23):
and then, yeah, obvious.
So I wanna change, so I wannachange my values.
So that's how we change.
That's one way that we changethem is that, or I wanna change
the order of my values.
I wanna change the importance ofmy values.
So in order to get growth up tothe top, I'm gonna have to.
Pull back on enjoyment.
Now, it doesn't mean you neglectit.

(38:43):
It's about balance.
It's about balancing.
Right.
But, so maybe instead of playingmy farm game every night, so I
quit my farm game.
Yeah.
I mean, how

Chris (38:52):
will, how will, how will the internet people get wheat?
Right.
I'm proud of you.
Seriously.

Sarah (38:58):
So, yeah.
So I gave up my farm game so Icould put more time towards my
growth.
So it's about balance andfiguring out what you want to
give up for the value that youreally wanna highlight in your
life.
So the other thing I reallyliked was talking about just
because someone doesn't shareyour values, excuse me, doesn't
mean their values are wrong.

(39:18):
Which is something that's reallyhard for me, it's,

Chris (39:22):
that one's really funny for me because it's such an,
it's such an A DHDcharacteristic.
Like ARS are just hard judgersall the time.
Yeah.
But I'm not like, it's the thingthat makes me think, well, maybe
I don't have a d.
See, but I think

Sarah (39:37):
that's the thing.
Like you don't have to have allof the things.
Right.
That's what I've been thinkingabout lately.

Chris (39:43):
You don't have to have every single one of'em, because
your life would be a bit morechallenging.
Yeah.
Lives a hard judger, like you'rea hard judge, so

Sarah (39:51):
it's, it's hard to, to pull back sometimes and realize,
oh, this person is acting thatway because they value this more
than I do.
The Drew shared the story that Ithought was really cool, and I'm
probably gonna fuck it up, butI'm gonna try to, to, to do it a
little bit of justice.
Don't fuck it up.
It's his, it's the taco truckstory, which immediately I love.

(40:13):
And it's, it's about how Drewalmost got into a, uh, fist
fight at the taco truck.
So he and his girlfriend at thetime go to the taco truck, they
eat their order, their food, andthey go sit at the picnic table.
At the picnic table.
There's also another gentlemanand they start chatting with
him.
He's a real nice guy.
He obviously has some mentaldisabilities and real sweet guy,
and they just keep chatting withhim and then eventually the guy

(40:35):
asks them, do you have any sparemoney so I can get onto the bus?
I spent my last bit of money onmy taco stuff and didn't realize
it, and they don't have anycash.
So, okay, so the guy gets up andhe goes up to the taco truck and
he puts his hand in the tip jarbecause that was his last bit of
money.
He put his money in the tip jarand so he just wanted to get his

(40:55):
his money back, but the guy whowas ordering at the time didn't
know that.
So the guy who's ordering at thetime and sees the guy come up
and put his.
Hand in the tip jar loses hisfucking mind, like, starts
screaming at this guy,screaming, cursing.
So Drew gets up, he wants tohelp this other guy because
he's, you know, they've builtsome sort of connection, right?

(41:16):
So he goes over, he's like, comeon buddy, let's just get outta
here.
We'll find you, we'll find youmoney.
Like, not confronting the otherguy, just trying to get him
outta there.
The other guy, the ordering guygoes in his pocket, grabs a
couple bucks and throws it likehand, right in the, in the tip
jar.
Guy's face like an asshole andcontinues to yell at him.
Drew loses his mind, startsscreaming at him.

(41:38):
So now they're screaming at eachother.
They're calling each othernames, yelling at each other.
The guy starts taking a stance,like he's gonna start to get
physical.
So Drew's like, all right, thisis how it's gonna be, so let's
go.
I choose violence, my friend,come on.
And Drew's girlfriend comes overand he is like, she was like,
drew, just sit down.
Like, sure, let's, so everythingcalms down, everything calms

(41:59):
down.
They end up chatting, shakinghands.
The guy has money to get on thebus.
Everything's,

Chris (42:04):
everything's fine.

Sarah (42:05):
So fine.
But as Drew was thinking aboutit, this is one of those things
like each person was reacting oracting on a, how did he put it?
A value trigger.
Oh, Drew's value that he, thathe was focusing on the most was
his carrying value, his help,his kindness.

(42:26):
And helping this guy, the guywho blew his mind was focusing
on his value of fairness andjustice, not cheating.
Yeah.
Like that was, that's his value.
And then Drew's girlfriend, shejust wants peace.
Like she just wants everybody tochill the fuck out.

Chris (42:43):
Right.

Sarah (42:44):
Right.
It doesn't make like Yeah.
The guy, the ordering guy, hedefinitely could have handled
things different.
I won't defend some, but you getthe gist of it.
Like it's, I mean, it's your

Chris (42:56):
value.
Yeah.
Like, and I just thought thatwas a really

Sarah (42:59):
interesting story.

Chris (43:01):
Ordering guy is just operating from his value.
Right?
Right.
Like, you don't steal thatmoney.
Right.
Period.
End of story.
That's my value.
Yeah.
Like maybe you only have one.
Like I know a lot of people thatonly have the one value, like
they're like, this is justiceand this is the only thing that
matters.
Yeah.
And if I can't tally up thescore right, then you're doing

(43:23):
it wrong.

Sarah (43:24):
Yeah.
So I, those were the, the coupleof things like the balancing of,
of the values, the, you're gonnahave to trade one off for the
other.
So the balancing and then justthe how we act, we're acting on
our values.
And just because we havedifferent values doesn't mean
that, that somebody's wrong.
They might act like an asshole.
Okay.
But I mean, you're, you'reallowed.

(43:46):
What, so there's a lot more, alot more going on in momentum.
I'm finding it.
That's helpful.
Extremely helpful.
I'm doing my work every daydigging into it.
Not just, it's kind of likecoaching with Michelle except
for I don't have her right in myface.
I think doing the coaching withMichelle first is helping me do
this, but it's definitely the,you know, we talked about it, I
think when we first starteddoing the podcast.

(44:07):
Like I could read all theseself-help books about, I don't
do shit about them.
So this is the action part.
Like this is Mark Manson and histeam making us do something.
Yeah.
So I like
that.
Yeah.
I, I really, really love it.

Chris (44:20):
I also like the idea of it being a zero sum game.
'cause that kind of makes senseto me in a way that maybe
nothing else.
Like, no, I, I don't recall thisin any of the self-help books,
the fact that you have a, youhave a fixed profile and a fixed
amount of time, space, andenergy, right?

(44:40):
Mm-hmm.
And if you're paying attentionand you're feeding these things
over here, you're doing thatbecause they're important to you
for some reason.
Right?
And until you can swap.
Something for something else,then you're always going to be
in the same place.
You're always gonna be repeatingthe same thing.
Like for instance, uh, today wasa lesson in sleep and how much I

(45:02):
really like sleeping in themorning.
And the reason I like sleepingin the morning is because I
stayed up too late looking at AIfor A DHD instead of actually
doing AI for A DHD.
So you'll get there, you'll getthere.

Sarah (45:17):
Don't be too hard on yourself.
It's crazy.

Chris (45:18):
Don't

Sarah (45:18):
be too

Chris (45:19):
hard.
No, no, no.
But, but now that, now thatyou've said that, like things
like one of the little, one ofthe little ticks that has to
fall in place fell in place forme.
You can't continue to do thesame shit.
You have to figure out a way todetermine what has to change.
And one way to do that is asusual, your values.
And I Exactly.
It always comes back to thevalues.

(45:39):
Figure them out.

Sarah (45:41):
Well, that's why, that's why I like this.
And it's, it's, it's a dailything.
It's not something that youjust, it just happens.
Like it's a constant work andit's messy.
It's difficult.
And if it's not messy anddifficult, you're probably not
doing it.
Right.

Chris (45:56):
Right.
If

Sarah (45:56):
you're not a little uncomfortable,

Chris (45:59):
I think it's also

Sarah (46:00):
the trick.
You're probably not doing itright.
Like you really have to, to digdown and make yourself a little
uncomfortable.
Like, I mean, there's some otherstuff that I'm not gonna talk
about because.
It made me feel bad, but yes, Ishouldn't say made me feel bad.
It made me uncomfortable andmade me a little bit
disappointed in myself.
Like things that you learn andyou don't realize.
Um, so, so those things arebrought to light and, um, and

(46:23):
you share as much and as littleas you want with people on the
forum.
And, uh, we actually, I'mworking with another guy.
We're putting together a littleaccountability group.
There's like five of us thatwanna be in the accountability
group.
Like one of his, one of thisguy's big wins was putting
himself out there and saying, Iwant an accountability partner.
Does anybody wanna be my friend?

(46:45):
And I said, oh my God, I wannabe your friend.
I wanna be your friend.
And so that's what, oh my God.
So we're putting together alittle accountability group,
which is fun.
So, yeah.
And the, the other thing thathas come out of that is I have
developed a mantra and adecision filter.

Chris (47:02):
Ooh,

Sarah (47:03):
tell me about it.
Which is fantastic.
So my mantra, I'm still, I stillhave to read it'cause I, my
mantra was just born yesterday,but I super love it.
Amen.
And it is, I choose growth overcomfort, alignment over impulse
and the future.
Me over the fleeting.
Now I don't need it to be easy.
I need it to be worth it.
I love it.
And so this the mantra, that'swhat I have to, like when I'm,

(47:25):
when I need to get up in themorning and start my day.
'cause that's when I'm at mybest is the morning.
If I just get the fuck outtabed, like I need to focus on my
mantra.
And it's, it's not, it's notgonna be easy, but you gotta do
it.
You have to choose the actionover the emotion.
Right?
And then my decision filter isthree questions I ask myself
when someone says, do you wannago to the bar?

(47:47):
Yes, I does this feed my growthor just soothe me, right?
Is it helping build future me orjust killing me?
And what am I trading it for?
What am I trading for it?
So, yeah.
So maybe I say, yeah.
I wanna go to the bar.
And what am I trading for that?
Well, I'm trading time onworking on this thing that, that
I'm trying to work on, that I'mgetting serious about.

(48:08):
So, but it makes you moreconscious of what you're
actually, that value that you'rekind of trading off.

Chris (48:14):
Yeah, that's, it reminds me of when, when I was in
graduate school.
Do you remember when I was ingraduate school?
I do.
And everybody else that we hungout with was already grownup
jobs.
Uhhuh.
They already had grownup jobsand they had, if they weren't at
work, they didn't have anythingelse to do.
So they would, everyone wouldjust hang out in the hot tub at

(48:35):
the pool or, you know, on daysoff they would go, like there
would be hiking involved.
And for a, for a period of acouple of months, I pretended
like I didn't have anything elsegoing on.
Yeah.
But I had, I had graduateschool, which it turns out was
kind of fucking hard.
Yeah.
I was no longer the smartestperson in the classroom, just by

(48:56):
default.
Yikes.
And it, yeah, at some point Ihad to be like, okay, I cannot,
if I, the price I'm gonna payfor going on this hike is then
that I don't get to, I don't getto study until 10 o'clock at
night and then I don't get tosleep.
So consciously decide if youwanna go, uh, scurry up

(49:18):
Camelback Mountain with a bunchof pharmacists or uh, uh, or if
you want to, you know, go to bedlike a normal person.

Sarah (49:26):
The, the great, going back to the values, like the
awesome thing about them is youshould constantly be
reevaluating them becausethey're not set in stone.
Right.
They shouldn't be the same allthe time.
The values I had 10 years ago,that's another thing we did the
one day was compare your valuesto 10 years ago, right?
Like 10 years ago.
I was just going back to workafter staying home with Owen and
I just wanted a job so we couldbuy shit.

(49:47):
Like, I literally wantednothing.
Like I couldn't have cared lessabout anything, but just getting
a real job.
Again.
That's it.
Like, right.
So they're constantly, they'reconstantly changing and you
should always be reevaluatingthem.
So just because right now Iwanna focus more on growth and
purpose doesn't mean that's howit's always going to be,
obviously.
So that brings up my next thingI wanna talk about.

(50:10):
Yay.
Because I started like, forreal, not just talking about it,
but I started putting togethermy business plan to get my
personal development coachingbusiness started.

Chris (50:22):
I love it.

Sarah (50:23):
And I've named it, it's gonna be pop, pop coaching, and
that's plan over panic coaching.
And I've decided on my niche, oris it niche, niche, niche,
niche, niche, niche.
What I'd like to do is I wouldlike to work with young adults
who, um, are recently gettingout of school.

(50:43):
And I think that I, I think Imay have mentioned this before,
you know, high school, four yearcollege, grad school, whatever
it is at that time in their lifewhere they're like, oh fuck.
Transition.
Fuck, what did I do?
Like, what am I supposed to do?
Um, and there's pe I mean,that's great for some like you
who know what you wanna do andget to do it.
And that's fantastic.

(51:04):
We just, we just fake it betterthan anybody else.
But then there's me who, who wasa, graduating with a, a business
major and I had no direction,nothing.
And I've lived with no directionpretty much.
So that's what I want to do.
I love this.
And of course, my vibe.
I want it to be real.
I don't want it to be all fluffyand shit.

(51:24):
Like, I want it to be veryupfront and understanding that
what we just talked about, it'sgoing to take effort.
You're gonna have to put thetime in.
And also, I really wanna focuson the fact that I'm not fixing
anybody.
There's nothing wrong with withyou.
The answers that you're lookingfor are actually in there
somewhere already.
You just need someone to helpyou dig them out.

(51:46):
So, yeah.
So I did my business plan todaybefore we got on.
Got on our, our recording.
Um, I'm so

Chris (51:55):
happy for you.
Yeah.
So I am talking to a young ladytomorrow about her recently
graduated.
She wants to get into clinicalresearch.
Mm-hmm.
She's got a, a data analytics degree.
Yeah.
So maybe I, uh, maybe I send youyour first customer.

Sarah (52:14):
So yeah, that's the way I wanna do it.
I wanna do a little more, I'mgonna finish up like the, take a
few more actual coachingclasses, polish a little bit,
which everything keeps tellingme don't even like, fuck it.
Like start, like just getstarted, get busy.
So I get three beta customerswho will get super, super cheap
rates and then move on fromthere.

(52:34):
So anyway, I'm working on it.
I've gotten to the point whereI, I have it, it's plan over
panic and that's what it'sabout.
So I'm making steps, I'm makingprogress, and I wouldn't have
done any of that withoutmomentum.
That's awesome.
That is,

Chris (52:49):
that is amazing.
You can't recommend it enough.

Sarah (52:52):
I absolutely love it.
It's a great little community.
And the month of June is aboutprocrastination.

Chris (52:58):
What?
So I will email Lynn the

Sarah (53:00):
link to her interview a little bit later so it opens up.
There was just one thing, like alittle icebreaker and share the
most outrageous or funniestthing that you've done to avoid
doing something else.
And just on Tuesday I wasavoiding doing procedure updates
'cause I hate them so badly.
Hate them.

(53:22):
Hate them.
You know what I did?
I pulled out all of my nailshit.
Like the UV lamp?
Yeah.
Like all, all the, all the shitin my little, my grinder thing.
And I fixed my thumb.
If it was just one, it was justone singular fingernail that had
a little chip in it.
So I You fixed it though.
All my shit out fixed.
My thumb.
Felt that bitch down fixed mythumb so I wouldn't have to do

(53:44):
procedures.
I took up Juujitsu so I wouldn'thave to clean the toilet.
Exactly.
So it's, I'll share with you what I learned about
procrastination.
Thank
you.
I might,
I might have to just sign up and do it with you.
Yeah, I love it.
And you get badges and shitlike,'cause you know, oh, I love
people love shit like that.
And I, I have a, I'm on a, Ithink 16 day streak with getting

(54:06):
on there and communicating.

Chris (54:08):
That's so fun.
It reminds me of when I did NerdFitness.
Nerd Fitness does that shit too.
Like, you get badges and you goon a quest.
I feel like I remember this,it's a, it's, it's right around
the same time I was doingCrossFit.
So I was really into all kindsof fitness shit.
And then this one is like a nerdwho got like strong in buff by
tricking himself into, you know,walking to the Shire.

(54:30):
Or walking to Mordo from theShire.
That's how we got in shape.
Okay.
Fun.
Fun.

Sarah (54:36):
I have.
All right.
I have only one more thing.
Do it.
Lay it out for anyone whodoesn't know already.
We had a Memorial Day soccertournament, so around this time
last year, I was freaking outabout Owen trying out for this
team and they just played intheir last tournament of the
year.
And I gotta tell you, these kidssuck.
Like it's not a great team.
They're not great.
They're not great.
We get our asses handed to us.

(54:58):
It's okay, it's fine.
They're learning, they're havinga good time.
It's fine.
Everything's fine.
It's fine.
So we trust me, we go to thistournament.
The first, the first team weplay, they're like our size.
I'm like, ah, alright.
We end up winning, I think threeto one.
Cool.
The next team, I'm like, thesedudes are in college.

Chris (55:15):
Were they bigger?

Sarah (55:16):
Yes.
During the warmup I was like,wow, we're fucked.
This is gonna be a blood bath.
Was there Coach British?
No, but he was some sort ofsomething he, he was the best
coach ever.
He was my favorite thing.
And we'll get to him later.
Well, we'll get to him.
He was an awesome coach.
Like his kids startedcomplaining about shit and he
was like, no, and whatever hisaccent is, he's tiny little guy

(55:38):
older with white hair and he,it's when the coach has any
accent.
Yeah, it doesn't have to beBritish.
He had his cute little accentand he was yelling, the kids
were yelling at the ref.
He's like, that's not what wedo.
That's not, we play, we play.
It was amazing.
Anyway, so like, yeah, we'regetting our asses kicked.
The first half, they totallyoutplayed us.
They hit.
The crossbar maybe four times.

(56:00):
Aw.
Like insane.
So it gets to, and when I saythey, the other team right, hits
the crossbar.
So it gets to halftime at zerozero.
I was like, well I, that in ofitself is a fucking miracle.
We're gonna call this one a win.
So I'm cool.
Like I, the second half is aboutto go bad though.
Our kids came out and like, wedid not get blown away.
That second half our kids playedwith them and kept up with them

(56:22):
and they didn't
give up and they ended upscoring a goal like, wait, the
other team didn't score.
So Correct.
Your team won.
Well, let me tell you how wescored the goal real quick.

Chris (56:35):
Is this the video you sent us?
No, no.

Sarah (56:37):
This is the next game.
Great.
We score behind a penalty kickbecause our, our smallest player
Finn was in and he was in thebox and the other.
The defender guy was coming athim as though Finn is the same
size as he is.
Oh.
Expecting to hit a person thesame size that he is.

(56:57):
That is not what happened.
And Finn went flying.
I've been there.
Yeah.
And so we got, we got a penaltykick and that's

Chris (57:04):
how we won that game.
I love it so much.
And my heart of hearts.

Sarah (57:09):
Yeah.
So it turns out we won.
Okay.
And then we got beat the nextmorning.
So we had four teams in ourbracket.
We ended up going three in one.
The last game we had was theexact same as this, the one I
just talked about.
Bigger outplayed, the firsthalf, yada, yada yada.
Our kids come out the secondhalf, they're, they're playing
their asses off.
I think that team hit thecrossbar once or twice.

(57:29):
My God.
Stop it.
And um, they have, they have apretty shitty goal kick that
goes right to my child on the 25yard line.
And he decides,'cause he's, he'stired, he's not gonna run with
it or anything.
He just gives it a little touchand basically gives it a Hail
Mary.
I mean, he, he's not gonna tellyou it's a Hail Mary.
He's gonna tell you he, that'sexactly what he tried to do.

(57:51):
It's exactly what he wanted todo.
Yeah.
And scores.
And there's two minutes left inthe game.
So we beat this team, which isamazing.
We go to the finals orchampionship and we're playing
the same team that we beat viapenalty kick.
It's the coach.

Chris (58:06):
Yeah, the accented coach.
It's

Sarah (58:08):
a great coach.
Yeah.
Our favorite coach.
Everyone.
Everyone's in college.
Everyone flunked.
Yeah.
It's amazing.
I, I should add, and this mightbe boring and that's fine, I'm
gonna add it anyway.
There were three other FC gamesbefore ours, and each one of
them ended in penalty kickswith, oh my God.
Our.
Club losing.
Oh.
So we were the last game of theday, and I 100, ex 100% expected

(58:30):
these boys to be coming out likeguns a blazing, wanting to pay
us back for getting thatbullshit win the day before.
Like, we're fucked.
We're fucked.
It's gonna be, it's gonna beembarrassing

Chris (58:40):
again.
Again.
Coach with an accent.
Bigger kids now they're pissed.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You would think.
You would think.

Sarah (58:48):
No.
They hit the crossbar twice.
One of them, well, they hit thecrossbar and then the sidebar, I
don't know what, but the onethat hit the sidebar hit like on
the inside of the sidebar andjust bounced right to our goalie
motherfucker.
Like if you're shooting that,you're like,
yeah, I,
I looked at Noah like, oh my God.
Um, and we go into overtime andhonestly, in this game, our boys

(59:10):
played, they played well.
I mean, they, they played ashard as they could and they
didn't give up.
And that's what I kept saying,like, that's what won the
weekend is just their grit, thatthey didn't give up at all.
And in the first five minuteovertime, they scored a goal and
held them off for the secondfive minute overtime and ended
up being the champions.
That's amazing.
I love it.
Let's go fc.

(59:31):
Yeah, so it was really fun.
Owen loved it.
And the goal that Owen scored,it was like for the, maybe the
first time I felt like what itwas like to be mommy and daddy
because I was.
Right before he scored, I wasgetting like, like nervous and
so I had to get up and I startedpacing the stands and Noah's
just sitting there watching andhe scores the goal and I almost

(59:51):
like fall down.
Like I'm hands up screaming,like almost fall down the
stands.
I look over and Noah is doingthe proud Papa.
Arms crossed jumbo master.
I love it.
It was fantastic.
So it was a great weekend and Ijust wanted to share that
because these boys, I was soproud of them for not giving up
and just continuing to give ittheir all.

Chris (01:00:12):
See, this is the, this is the trick.
Like we can be, we can be allangsty.
And I've seen on Facebook, likeall of the, uh, you know, here's
the tryout schedule for thiscompetitive team.
Yeah.
It's time and here's the tryoutschedule, like, and the amount
of anxiety I had.
Yeah.
Two years after, this isn't anissue for me anymore.

(01:00:34):
Like three, four years after wewere actually trying, five years
after we're actually trying outfor a team.
Yeah.
Like the P-T-S-D-I had justlooking at all these tryout
schedules and then still,because I'm me, I'm like lining
up the dates and I'm like, thesemotherfuckers, they have theirs

(01:00:56):
one week later.
Yeah.
Oh.
And these two have'em on thesame day.
So you have to pick.

Sarah (01:01:03):
Yeah.
It's very, it's very strategicand dumb I think.
I don't know.
But FC does some, like, I thinkmost players do that.
Like Owen already has his offerfor next year.
Yeah.
Like they do an early tryout with the boys in the
spring.
So, and in fact their tryout isnext Friday and Owen can't go
'cause he is getting his wisdomteeth out.

Chris (01:01:21):
Right.
And there's like, so we don'teven have

Sarah (01:01:23):
to go through it.

Chris (01:01:24):
I have to plan the vacation around when soccer
tryouts are, it's.
Totally a bizarre thing.
Yeah.
But you know, at the end, your,your kid's gonna find a team
where they fit in and they'rehaving a good time and it's not
so over the top.
Crazy.
Yeah.
And like the, the lessons thatthose kids are gonna take out of

(01:01:44):
that are so much more than, uh,than, you know, you gotta be the
best guy on the team when you'reeight.
Yeah, for sure.
Do you know what I mean?
For sure.
Like, I love it.
I, it's why we play sports.
In fact, I was having aconversation again with somebody
I work with.
What's up Booker?
Um, about the, the differencebetween people who played team

(01:02:05):
sports when they were growing upand people who didn't and how
they navigate the workplace.
Yeah.
Like wildly different approachesfor these two groups of people.
And not that one is better thanthe other one, of course.
No, but, but just a different

Sarah (01:02:20):
approach.

Chris (01:02:20):
But you can tell like, like-minded people work well
together.
Mm-hmm.
It's crazy.
But, but yeah, I mean, that'sthe good stuff that comes outta
sports.
And you just have to keep, youjust have to keep your parent
crazy in check, and you have tokeep their kids crazy in check
and hope for the best.

Sarah (01:02:37):
Yeah.
One of the games before us,there was a dad who was just
Wow.
And there was some karma thathappened.
Yeah.
And it's, it was sad.
And then like, talking aboutvalues, I was like, oh, I feel
so bad for the goalies.
And this wasn't even in apenalty kick.
This was something else.
I was like, I feel so bad forthe goalie.
Noah was like, why?
I was like, because I fuckingempathy.

(01:02:58):
Right.
I
feel so bad.
He's like, oh, yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
Oh yeah.
I felt bad for him too.
I don't know if he thought like,I felt bad.
Like he scraped his knee.
Like, like is he's
not hurt.
God haven't help us.
Anyway, I think we could wrap itup.
Um, I hope so.
Good.
I think we have plenty, plentyfor Becca to edit.
All right, let's sign off.
Okay.
You hit the button.
Hold on.

(01:03:19):
Okay.
Love you.
Bye.
Love you.
Bye.

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Episode 53: BJJ - It's Not an Extra J

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Episode 53: BJJ - It's Not an Extra J