Strap in for a wild ride as I pour one out for my fallen metal comrade, an endearing Mercedes that left its tire marks on my heart before succumbing to the cruel fate of machinery. We'll navigate the labyrinth of insurance claims peppered with humor and arm you with negotiation tactics sharper than a dealership's suit. And if the going gets tough, we might just let you in on why lawyering up could be your best bet in this vehicular Viking funeral.
Switching gears, our chuckles continue with a front-row seat to the comedy spectacle that skewered none other than Tom Brady. Celebrities and athletes alike took swings at the football titan's expense, but we'll dissect those zingers with a dose of admiration for the man who can take a joke as well as a Super Bowl ring. Experience the hilarity and poignancy of ribbing one of sports' finest, all while maintaining the finesse of a spiral pass.
Lastly, buckle up as we cruise through the tales of 'redneck season,' where the whirlwind of Southern twisters meets the soulful twang of Jelly Roll's redemption songs. From survival stories in the face of nature's fury to the harmonious chords of a man's journey from the pen to the pinnacle of music, we find the silver linings and missing cats along the way. Tune in for this melodic mix of mayhem, memories, and music that keeps our podcasting spirits soaring.
Subscribe to 'The Original Canceled Radio Guys' . Go to https://www.ChrisandCostello.com
Email ChrisandCostello@Yahoo.com
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:15):
Hey, this is Chris.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
This is Costello, here we go.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
There we go.
There's been a death in thisfamily.
Oh, here we go, there we go.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
There's been a death in his family, oh man.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
It's your favorite relative too.
I can't believe this happenedto you.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
Go ahead.
You know what?
The good guy young, don't they?
I am bereaved.
I am so terribly bereaved.
Would you like to know why?
Speaker 1 (00:44):
Yes, go ahead and tell everyone let it out, and
you'll feel better.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
I will try and do it and be manly, without shitting a
tear.
They totalled my car, my littleMercedes.
Speaker 1 (00:58):
My little Mercedes.
We had the coolest two-seatMercedes.
Sometimes there'd be dog shitin the passenger seat and the
front seat, but even it was sucha cool car.
And then this place you took itto because you had someone kind
of t-bone you, I guess, rightand you've had it in the shop
(01:18):
since february and they took allthis time to determine just now
that your car is total and it'sgot to go.
How about three, four months?
What kind of damn place did yousend it into.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
Well, no, the place was okay.
The problem was the Mercedesdealership, and that's probably
what tipped it over the edge,and the other place that was
doing the bodywork.
They were fine, they were justcool.
But this is Traveler'sinsurance.
Who are totaling it?
Not my insurance, theirinsurance, have you gone?
Speaker 1 (01:51):
to look at the car.
They've done some body work.
It probably looks pretty good,so what's?
Speaker 2 (01:54):
the problem.
It looks absolutely bloodywonderful.
No, I haven't, but I think Ishall be doing so this next week
.
But you've got to look at itbefore they cremate it.
You know, Rub it in a bit morewhy don't you?
Speaker 1 (02:09):
I mean I decided my car would have pissed because it
was such a cool car.
It's a two-seater hardtopconvertible.
Costello would let that topdown, let his three hairs blow
in the breeze, I mean it wasawesome.
It was a wonderful little carand you know, the dog shit would
fly out and you'd clean out theseat for you.
You'd get three hairs of yoursflapping up in the breeze.
(02:31):
I mean, it was just like youcouldn't get any cooler than
that for South Carolina.
It was a great car.
Speaker 2 (02:37):
It's a Mercedes man I'd only seen one other in this
part of the world, and there'sone on the internet and it's
going for $21,000, which isabout four grand more than I
paid for mine.
The same year, same color,everything.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
Jump on it.
I'm well Get that insurancecheck and just go on over there
and just go okay.
Speaker 2 (03:01):
I'll take it, yeah, but it won't be for 21 grand
because I doubt I'm going to getthat out of the insurance.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
You can negotiate that.
Speaker 2 (03:09):
That's where you're earning.
Look money, Real money.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
Just go get cash or insurance, I'll come with cash.
Here's the cash price righthere, right now.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
And then, before I find out, that's been totaled as
well.
Speaker 1 (03:26):
But your insurance check.
You need to go look at your car, man.
I mean, this is like you've hadit in there since February.
That's three months of themworking on your car and all of a
sudden they go eh, we're justtired of working, we're going to
total.
Screw it, Bring on the next car.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
Yeah, we can't get the parts Bullshit.
Anyway, that's very sad, sadnews, and I shall move on in
life, I suppose.
Speaker 1 (03:47):
So you get your insurance money and you get
insurance money from the guy whoran into you, right?
Speaker 2 (03:53):
Well, I'll get insurance money from somebody.
Speaker 1 (03:55):
You put those two together your insurance and his
insurance and bingo you've got anew Mercedes boy, here we go.
That'd be nice.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
That'd be nice.
I don't know what you just did,but it just went all fuzzy.
Speaker 1 (04:12):
That's your new car.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
Oh, it's all fuzzy.
Don't do it again, I'll do itquieter.
Vroom vroom.
Vroom vroom.
Speaker 1 (04:24):
Okay, that's the sound of your car.
It's fuzzy because it's total.
Speaker 2 (04:30):
Yeah, well what do they do with total cars?
Do they just put them into anauction?
Speaker 1 (04:35):
Well no, they strip it for parts and then they
squish it.
They do the car cremation.
They'll take your tires,They'll take what's good from
the engine parts, all that youknow what.
They'll squish it and then ifyou cremate it off, it goes.
It'll be a little tiny squareblock.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
I'll tell you what.
There's new tires on there,there's a new battery in there,
the brakes are really.
I mean, I put top of the lineEnough.
This is not tool time.
Speaker 1 (05:05):
You enough.
This is not tool time, you know.
The problem is that you'regetting paid your insurance from
that.
You can't, I would sayotherwise, take the tires off
and stuff, but then they'llminus that from your check, so
it's theirs now You've got to gosee that man.
You just can't accept thisyayo's word like yeah, it's
total, it's over with.
Speaker 2 (05:21):
You've got to go look at it.
I've got to call into myattorney already.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
I mean, you know, so they at least you know.
Well, we'll see, anyway.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
Well, I'll deal with it.
Offer him again.
Do we cheat him in hell?
Is that it?
Yes, okay.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
No, it's the fine, mr Finkel.
He's a very good attorney, mrFinkel's name.
I'm going to start that again.
You might listen to this andget mad and drop the case.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
If New York attorneys come down to South Carolina to
handle cases like yours, okay,what's fine.
The other one Go get them, man.
Just don't take their word forit.
Go look at your car.
I shall.
I must definitely show them.
Show me why it's total.
Show me why it's total.
Show me why it's dead.
Show me why we made it.
You go look at it, boy.
Go get it, I'll get it.
Speaker 2 (06:09):
I'll get it, I'll go.
I'll go wearing my leatherjacket and riding my motorcycle
to be just a little bit edgy youknow, put on a fake tattoo and
have your sleeve rolled up.
There you go, not a tattoo, butyeah, face tattoo.
Speaker 1 (06:22):
Yeah, I have a skull and crossbones on with the
saying I kill auto workers.
You know and you see what youdo.
Speaker 2 (06:29):
Any insurance adjusters yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:31):
Yeah, go for it, man.
Just don't take the word for it.
Go for it, man.
Go get it, your car, it's agreat car.
Did you name your car?
I forgot that.
Do you have a name?
Speaker 2 (06:41):
for it.
No, I never did.
I don't do that for some reason.
Used to, when I was a kid, ourcars all had names.
Speaker 1 (06:50):
Like what.
Speaker 2 (06:53):
Ethel was one.
In fact, I think that's aboutthe only one I can remember.
I used to think Ethel.
Speaker 1 (06:59):
No, there was.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
Ethel.
There was another one which wasan Austin Beetle, not a
Volkswagen Beetle, an A30.
Don't remember what my motherused to give everything names
cats, dogs, people.
Oh sure, why not.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
I named my first car.
It wasn't like a name, I justcalled it the Magnet.
Everybody liked to run into it,so we called it the Magnet.
Oh okay, I was thinking shit,magnet.
But yeah, you feel like havinga wreck, feel like you're
hitting another car?
Yeah, hit me, it won't run intothe car.
There's the magnet.
Beat up my.
(07:35):
That one had to be totaled afterlike the sixth wreck, the last
one I stood in the driveway andwatched the tow truck tow it
away and tear running down mycheek.
I was so sad.
I love that car.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
Yeah, I know.
Well, you know, love the car,it's true, it's true.
I'm just going to go up to theinsurance guy and I'm right in
his face.
Speaker 1 (08:01):
That's it.
Go down there and intimidatethose South Carolina rednecks.
Okay, I'll just ride themotorcycle, that'll do it, and
then give them the British whatfor okay.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
Yeah say hey, come here, boy Bend over.
That's two of the best.
Speaker 1 (08:18):
You're going to deliverance the guy.
What are you going to do to him?
Speaker 2 (08:21):
No, no, no, no, I'm not poking anything up there,
I'm just wrapping somethingaround it.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:28):
Go do that.
Let us know how it goes.
Okay, it's such a good car.
It's really suck news, so letus know okay.
Speaker 2 (08:37):
It wasn't exactly a high-impact collision either the
slowest collision you ever sawbut there you go.
All right, Something goSomething.
Speaker 1 (08:48):
I can't just say I can't get the parts right now.
Something, go down there andfind out what it is.
I want an update on next week'sshow Promise.
Speaker 2 (08:55):
I promise, why don't you come down and be menacing
with me?
Speaker 1 (08:58):
I'd love to Welcome to the next.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
You ain't got shit else to do.
Yep, it's a slow weekend.
Well, good to know.
Ain't got shit else to do.
Speaker 1 (09:07):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (09:09):
It's a slow weekend.
Sorry, honey, I've got to go toSouth Carolina.
That's where the ladies need togo, got to go down there.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
It's been kind of outside of your death and your
family, your car.
It's been kind of a week allkinds of stuff going on,
recurring stories a lot.
You know, this is true.
The first thing we got to dothe Trump thing he was whining,
because first he begged thejudge.
I need to get off trial day soI go to my son's graduation.
The judge, the judge grantedtrump to do that.
(09:37):
I don't get to be with mybeautiful life milady on her
birthday.
Well, you know what she reallywanted to be with him on his on
her birthday.
She could have come to where hewas, which is new york, you
know, obviously, and she wantedto be around that orange turd so
she didn't bother going up.
But he whined about it, okay,and we were lucky we had the
Kristen Costello microphonethere, so we got the Trump
(10:00):
birthday whine.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
Should we do it now?
Shall we, shall, we do that.
Is that the birthday card?
Speaker 1 (10:07):
It's the birthday whine from Trump to Melania on
her birthday Wishing her a happybirthday.
Speaker 5 (10:13):
I'd like to read to you all from a letter I sent
today to my wife, melania, onher birthday.
To my dearest wife, melania,happy birthday, my darling.
I'm so sorry I can't be withyou on this special day, but I
am standing trial for falsifyingbusiness records and campaign
violations stemming from asexual relationship I had with a
(10:34):
porn star when you werepregnant with your I mean our
son.
And let me tell you, honey,that Stormy Daniels has got
titties for days.
I'm talking about titties likeyou'll never have Great big ones
.
She almost got me to have anerection but, as you know, I'm
impotent so it didn't last long.
But in any case, stormy's gotknockers like a porn star, which
(10:54):
she is.
But in any case, stormy's gotknockers like a porn star, which
she is.
And as you know, honey, my, mypurchase agreement from when I
bought you, specifies that I canraw dog as many famed whores as
I want, and you can't doanything about it.
You should have never marriedme if you wanted a decent man
with principles.
I mean, I hung out with JeffreyEpstein, for fuck's sake.
(11:16):
What did you expect?
And yes, my darling, they'regoing to put Karen McDougal on
the stand and she'll testifythat I had an extended affair
with her when your son I meanour son was an infant.
I romanced that woman and spenta lot of money on her and just
basically played you for a fool,which is what I think you are,
my sweet darling.
I had countless other affairsand sexually assaulted other
(11:37):
women and even raped them.
I'm a disgusting sexual deviantand a pervert and a habitual
abuser of women.
But on this special day, I wishyou the very best.
And, as you say in yourlanguage which, as you know,
means you probably shouldn'thave signed your life away back
(12:00):
in 2005, you, slovenian hagthere you go.
Speaker 1 (12:06):
I think Melanie had a great birthday because she
didn't have to be around him.
So happy birthday to you, youknow hopefully not soon to be
first lady again.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
Yeah, well, amen to that, and yeah, of course I mean
.
You know it's so obedient, hag.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
He must love her Trump.
Of course we're going to dothat a little bit later.
Again, we're going to bring upa really heavily watched.
They did a live event onNetflix.
The last time they did a liveevent was at the Chris Rock
stand-up concert, which is live.
Of course you can do it now,you can even watch it.
But Sunday they did theultimate roast of retired
(12:45):
football GOAT.
The best quarterback of all time, tom Brady, had a perform on LA
.
It was about God, 12,000 peoplein there to watch that.
It was some really stinkingfunny parts.
It lasted three hours, athree-hour roast.
I mean I thought man, it's waytoo much.
But you know what Each personwas funny.
Belichick was there, I got agrok.
(13:10):
Rob Wachowski being dumb, youknow, stinking hilarious.
But they really made fun ofGiselle a lot at the ex-wife
Giselle.
They call her Giselle.
You know just, you said you gotthe G is it's just a boyfriend?
I was just thinking fine, she'spissed off, she's gone.
You know, all I care about isrespect for myself and our
(13:34):
family and our kids and himgoing there and those people
just rip our family to shredslike that.
It's just awful.
It's a roast, damn it.
That's what they're about.
You know he had to sit thereand take it in person.
I mean they stuck it to him.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
This is what roasts are.
Yeah, so he got pissed off?
Did he walk off?
Speaker 1 (13:56):
No, he got pissed at one thing All the people making
fun of his ex-wife, giselle, hedidn't say a word.
He laughed, he rolled his eyes.
But when a guy one of theroastmasters made fun of his
ex-owner, robert Kraft, he gotup and told him you can hear him
on the mic going.
Don't bring up that shit againis what he said and what Ross is
(14:18):
talking about.
He's going.
And this part is true he goes.
When Brady was picked number199 in the draft, the sixth and
final round, he walked into MrKraft's office the owner.
He goes.
You picking me is the bestthing that you've ever done for
this franchise, which is true.
He said that.
Then he added on one extra linehe goes now.
Would you like a massage?
(14:39):
Remember Mr Kraft was you knowhe got.
He got into heat for solicitingprostitutes at a massage parlor
down in Florida.
That's where the massage jokecame in.
So Brady gets up and goes.
(14:59):
Don't bring up that shit again,because apparently him and
Kraft are pretty close.
The only reason he left wasbecause of Coach Belichick.
Speaker 2 (15:06):
So we'll be able to watch this on what Netflix?
Speaker 1 (15:09):
Oh yeah, it's on right now it's speaking.
Hilarious man.
It's just like Drew Bledsoe,who was the quarterback of the
Patriots, who got hurt, wasreally sick in the hospital.
That's when Brady took over anddid so well that Bledsoe never
was the starting quarterbackagain.
He said there's two things thatI have.
Even though you've got theseseven Super Bowl rings, all
(15:30):
these MVPs and you took myfucking job, he goes, but I've
got two things you'll ever have,one being the first draft pick,
which he was, and two, I justcelebrated my 28th wedding
anniversary.
You've already been divorcedtwice.
Oh really, you had the best set.
(15:51):
You got to watch this Gatel.
She goes.
So you got seven rings, buteight now because Giselle gave
hers back.
Oh, kevin Hart's going, tom,what part didn't you get?
She's going just so quiet.
That's eight times a day.
Didn't the light bulb go off?
You dumb shit?
He'd go.
Fuck you, tom.
All right.
Speaker 2 (16:15):
We'll have to watch that.
Speaker 1 (16:17):
That's going to be good for us.
Look how pretty he is.
One guy goes I want to fuckthat dimple on your face.
I mean it's just.
I mean it's out there, soyou'll love it.
Costello, it's great there's somany good drops we can pull
from that show.
We'll do so and we'll play somehighlights next week for those
who haven't watched it yet ordon't have Netflix Okay, all
(16:40):
right, you've got it.
You may not get all the jokesbecause a lot of them are in
reference to football and hiscareer and other players and
whatever.
So if you know football stuff,then it's all speaking funny
Some you may go what Over yourhead.
Speaker 2 (16:55):
What the hell are you talking about?
That's what I said.
Speaker 1 (17:00):
You're known as Mr Sports Guy Costello 2024.
Yes, indeed.
Speaker 2 (17:06):
Yeah, oh, I know.
At least I know what a quarteris now, I mean a quarterback is.
So you know.
Speaker 1 (17:13):
And who hikes the ball to the quarterback?
So you know.
And who hikes the ball to thequarterback?
Da-da-da-da-da-da-da.
Oh, that time.
Speaker 2 (17:24):
No Center, the center , oh, okay.
Okay, I know that now.
Speaker 1 (17:33):
Slowly but surely.
Slowly but surely.
He hikes the ball to Brady andhe's not going to pass.
He hands it off to the whoReceiver.
Nope, he's not passing.
So he gets hiked the ball bythe center.
He turns around.
He's not going to be a passplayer, so he hands the ball off
to the who.
Speaker 2 (17:55):
To the referee Running back.
Yeah, the running referee back.
Yeah, I just look at the.
Can they run, do they catch, dothey score?
Okay?
Speaker 1 (18:09):
Yeah, that's it.
Watch it for the beercommercials, I know.
Speaker 2 (18:15):
Hey, you know, well, I'm watching that UFSL thing,
that new football.
Speaker 1 (18:20):
I'm surprised you're watching that Because he gives a
crap People.
Will you wait and see Sometimes?
Speaker 2 (18:23):
good players.
I'm surprised you're watchingthat because he gives a crap.
It's like spring football.
Speaker 1 (18:26):
Ah people, will you wait and see you move?
Sometimes good players comefrom that who make it to the NFL
.
They leave, you know.
You remember Trump.
He saw a football team that wasa different league, the New
Jersey Generals.
That was his, wasn't it?
Yeah, yeah, that went bankrupt.
Like all the other stuff hetouches, he touches it and it
turns to crap.
Speaker 2 (18:48):
Oh boy, it sounds like my poor car, have you?
Speaker 1 (18:52):
been watching.
Speaker 2 (18:56):
I just don't know if I can continue.
I mean, you know Just invite meto the funeral.
Speaker 1 (18:59):
I'd like to go to that.
I can't pay my respect Afuneral for a car.
I can see pay my respect Afuneral for a car.
Speaker 2 (19:05):
You know, we can make it now you can have like a Go
ahead.
I'm sorry you could have like alow rider there, you know a
truck and put it up on that withflowers around it and just have
all the other Mercedes do thislong thing around it.
Speaker 1 (19:21):
I've got my classic car there, which is the Magnet
Part 2,.
Okay, I got a classic car overmy original car, which is the
Magnet, so now I've seen it inthe garage it's the Magnet Part
2.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
Oh really, people are hitting.
That too, no, no.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
The original one was the Magnet.
This one is in pristine shape,okay.
No one said that, no one saidthat and my wife dinged the door
, opening her car into the sideof it, except I had a heart
attack over it, so outside ofthat it's perfect.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
Oh, not your, the one that was in the shop forever as
well.
Speaker 1 (19:54):
Yes, yes, oh, I got mine back.
Okay, it was in there for fiveand a half freaking months that
I got it back.
We're going to have a funeralfor your car, which I have a
good name now that your car isgone.
It would be the Hot Red DogTurdmobile.
Speaker 2 (20:15):
Something very strange has just happened.
I've just heard the door close.
Speaker 1 (20:18):
You have an intruder.
That's your neighbor.
He's just come over to get abeer out of the fridge.
It might be, it might be.
Speaker 2 (20:23):
Boogie.
I haven't seen him in a while.
Oh boy, it looks stormy outside.
Maybe that's what it was.
The door opened again.
I have a cat.
She can now open and close thatback door.
Speaker 1 (20:36):
I have two dogs that do that Right now.
Where we are.
The bears are coming out andthey're hungry.
They're all over theneighborhood, so you can't leave
any food out.
If they think there's some foodaround, they just won't stop on
the outside.
They'll rip into your car,break into your house if they
think there's food around.
So you've got to be reallycareful.
But they're everywhere.
Speaker 2 (20:58):
I don't think we have bears here.
We have raccoons, which I'veonly seen one.
Yeah, no bears.
Spring comes out to rednecks inSouth Carolina.
Speaker 1 (21:09):
Right, it's redneck season.
Speaker 2 (21:12):
They come out for redneck season.
Speaker 1 (21:13):
Yes, no, it is the rednecks.
Do come out, it's redneckseason.
Speaker 2 (21:17):
Oh.
I don't know, I know nothing.
Speaker 1 (21:21):
Springtime is the rednecks come out of hibernation
from the winter.
They come out of theirbackyards in the trailers and
they're out there in the publicwalking the streets.
Redneck season man.
Speaker 2 (21:32):
Oh okay, I'll go get me a 12-4 or something and go
hunting.
Speaker 1 (21:40):
Get you a six-pack of beer and you see them walk
around and just go here you go,here you go, there we go.
Good to see you again.
Been a long winter, yeah.
Speaker 2 (21:52):
Sure has, boy.
You know what it's 90 degreestoday.
It's been quite warm here, as amatter of fact, and I think we
have a storm On the way as well.
I can see the Leaves coming offthe trees and the birds heading
Wherever they can.
Midwest see the leaves comingoff the trees and the birds
heading wherever they can.
Speaker 1 (22:07):
Midwestern storms are coming your way, man.
Do you guys have any tornadowarnings out there in South
Carolina?
Speaker 2 (22:14):
We have them.
But you know what, when I livedin Belton, texas, which is
where I moved from, they neverhad tornadoes or anything.
Well, I mean, we didoccasionally.
But this last week they've hadso many tornadoes in that area,
like Temple Waco that area, thatI mean, man, I'm surprised the
place is still there.
There's a little town inOklahoma, I think it's Enid,
(22:38):
that is now no more.
That wasn't a small town either.
Speaker 1 (22:43):
Yeah, my accountant lives in Bartlesville, oklahoma.
He was a mile from the more.
That wasn't a small town either.
My accountant lives inBartlesville, oklahoma.
He was a mile from me.
I would say Bartlesville.
Yes, he lost all of his treesand stuff, but his house is okay
.
Speaker 2 (22:52):
But he's okay, he's good.
Yeah, well, of course you knowabout houses and tornadoes,
don't you?
Speaker 1 (22:59):
Yes, I do.
Speaker 2 (23:00):
Yes, yes sir.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
That'd be right about a year ago?
Yep, about a year ago, and thatfour-hip at the house that I
bought lived in for quite a longtime.
Yeah, and so I understand that.
I was told yesterday that theoccupant of it now has moved
back in.
The house has been repaired, ittook me over a year and she's
back in there.
Speaker 2 (23:21):
Oh, is she indeed oh well a nice respite before she
goes somewhere else.
I don't know.
Look at that house, man.
I mean the wall, the main wall,was just buckled out.
I mean, it was really bizarre.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
But check the foundations.
They had to do foundation workand just put everything back
together.
Speaker 2 (23:44):
Let's just be positive and say, well, that's a
good thing.
And how's the chimney?
Did they reinforce that or didthey weaken it a bit more?
The?
Speaker 1 (23:51):
chimney was great, but that's what saved her Yep.
Speaker 2 (23:56):
So they didn't walk behind the chimney.
Speaker 1 (23:58):
Yeah, that did it.
Speaker 2 (24:00):
So your architectural plans that you drew up to kind
of weaken it a bit, didn't.
Speaker 1 (24:07):
She goes into my hidey hole and saved her life by
going to my hidey hole.
Well then she went to the pornroom and to get her life saved
with the F-4 trainer, Well,there you go.
Speaker 2 (24:19):
You should be feeling very happy about that.
You are be feeling very happyabout that.
Not many people get divorced,lose their house and then have
their house demolished by atornado.
Speaker 1 (24:35):
I mean come on, that is just like, yeah, all right,
it could have been a cause forcelebration, but it turned out
it was not.
Speaker 2 (24:42):
It wasn't no.
The hidey hole ruinedeverything, oh well.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
It did.
Speaker 2 (24:45):
We're going down a dark passage, rather like a
hidey hole.
Let's keep all the fewlisteners that we have left.
(25:20):
Let's say a great big hello toeverybody who emailed us, by the
way.
Speaker 1 (25:25):
Yeah, we appreciate that that's super Glad to have
you, man.
Glad to have you.
Speaker 2 (25:31):
I tell you what we're a hidden Saudi we are.
Speaker 1 (25:36):
We'll take the Saudis , yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:39):
You can actually.
We'll take anybody andeverything.
Speaker 1 (25:44):
At the Saudis.
We're getting people over inyour neck of the woods, over in
England, Scotland, yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:49):
Yeah, and of course in the south of America, south
part of London, we're at theredneck favorite station,
because we do pick up Trump fromtime to time.
But, the rednecks.
Speaker 1 (25:59):
I wanted to ask you about this have you been
watching American Idol at all?
Speaker 2 (26:03):
Yes, yeah, it's not a bad season.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
It's Katy Perry's last year on it.
So do you know who she wants toreplace her as judge?
And she's asked the guy.
The guy said yes, of course theproducers haven't asked him yet
, but he said he would do it andshe picked her own replacement,
but just the producers haven'tsaid yes yet.
You know who she wants, did youknow?
You don't know.
Speaker 2 (26:25):
No, I don't.
I didn't know that.
Speaker 1 (26:27):
You ready, I'm ready.
Jelly roll, oh come on.
Speaker 3 (26:32):
I only talk to God when I need a favor and I only
pray when I ain't got a prayer.
So who the hell am I?
(26:53):
Who the hell am I to expect asavior?
We'll be right back, but Iain't been living them worse
Swear.
I spend more Sundays Drunk offmy ass Than I have in church.
Hardcover King James Only beensaving dust On the nightstand
(27:15):
and I don't know what to say bythe time I'm a King James, I
ain't been saving dust.
Speaker 1 (27:22):
He was like a guest maker over there in Hawaii.
It just blew me away.
I gotta go back to churchbecause of him.
He can sell me anything.
He's my replacement.
I want Jelly Roll.
That would be interesting Jelly.
Roll has come out of nowhere.
This guy was in prison.
He was in prison tattoos.
He's overweight.
He got out.
He had one successful song.
(27:43):
He's got a new CD out.
He's like on a friggin' roll.
I mean, what do you think ofJelly Roll?
Do you like his music?
Do you like him as a?
Speaker 2 (27:50):
person.
It's not bad.
I mean, you know it'sdefinitely not.
I mean I think it's, I wouldsay, very clever, but well done
for doing what you've done andgetting to where you're getting.
What I would like to see iswhat I'd like to know is what
Lionel Richie would have to sayabout this.
I mean, there's a guy who hasbeen in my business all of them
when he was a guest pitcher.
Speaker 1 (28:10):
I think he liked it.
So Jelly has got new teeth now.
Okay, 350 pounds got a long wayto go.
You know His song you shouldhave paid attention to is called
I Only Talk to God when I needa favor.
But, Castello, if you didn'ttalk to God and said I just
saved my car, you might stillhave a car, but you didn't get a
favor well, maybe that'splaying on my car's radio as we
(28:33):
speak.
Speaker 2 (28:35):
We could have that as part of the memorial.
Speaker 1 (28:39):
Just think about those lyrics, isn't it true?
People only really turn to talkto God when they need something
.
Or please speak to yourselfthose lyrics, isn't it true,
people?
Speaker 2 (28:48):
only really turn to talk to god when they need
something.
You know, oh, if there is a god.
Actually I had this reallything, weird thing happen with,
uh, one of my cats who was intexas with me.
Unfortunately didn't make itout, but, um, he was very old
when we moved and he got lostand four days and I'm, I'm
looking for Bob.
Bob was incredible.
He was a wonderful animal.
Well, cats do that shit.
(29:08):
They leave for a while and comeback, right.
Well, I don't know if he wasplanning on coming back, but
anyways, yeah, sometimes he did,but at any rate.
So I'm walking around thislittle bit of the neighborhood
and somebody said, well, that'swhere all the cats go, I go, all
right.
Well, that's where all the catsgo, I go, all right.
Well then, here's hoping,because I really was missing him
(29:31):
more than I'm missing my car atthis point.
So I go around the corner andsaid, you know, just in that
kind of self-narrative you have,you know, you're thinking to
yourself well, you know what, ifthere is a God, bob will walk
around this corner right now.
No, he didn't do exactly that.
Speaker 1 (29:46):
So after the blue ping, there's bob there bob was
that he became a leader of theneighborhood gang and that's why
he hasn't been probably.
Speaker 2 (29:54):
He was huge.
Speaker 1 (29:55):
He was twice as big as my mother who's his cat to do
that.
My mom had a cat.
That cat would take off for aweek, two weeks at a time.
He'd come back with a rat orbird in his mouth or just
whatever he felt like comingback home, she didn't worry
about it, he'd just go for days.
Bob was old.
Speaker 2 (30:10):
Yeah, but he shouldn't be going.
He was old and he was anex-breeder, like the cat I have
now.
Same thing she's a breeder.
Speaker 1 (30:19):
He's a humper.
He's a whateder.
He's a humper.
He's a.
What A humper.
He's a breeder.
Come on, oh yeah, he was.
Speaker 2 (30:32):
So was Malone.
That's one way of getting apurebred cat and not having to
spend any money on it when theyretire them.
Speaker 1 (30:43):
But a dog guy.
I mean.
Picture yourself you're lookingfor your cat.
You're out there going Bob, hey, bob, bob, the cat.
When you call them, they justlook at you and go eh, fuck you,
you've got your calling yourdog.
Your dog's ears will perk upand they'll go oh, it's my
master.
And they come running and say,hey, hey, how you doing?
Will you call a cat?
If you leave me alone, I've gotthings to do.
(31:03):
I'm hanging out with theneighborhood kitty guys out here
we're going to spend the day.
Speaker 2 (31:07):
This is true, but I was a good mile and a half away
from the house for a start, along ways off right by the
railroad tracks, and it was oneof those magical moments.
You know, it was justinteresting, so there you go.
Speaker 1 (31:21):
You only talk to God when you need a favor, and he
came through for it.
Our Bob heard you say it and hegoes.
Jesus, this guy's desperate.
Let me show him what thefreaking cats do you know?
Speaker 2 (31:35):
I do think it's kind of interesting, though, that
Shelley Roll's story Well, whenhe won his Grammy last year, won
his Grammy last year.
Speaker 1 (31:43):
Man.
He's winning the big countrymusic awards coming up.
Later this month.
He's up for Entertainer of theYear, which is the biggie.
The guy's had a stinkingawesome year, the thing is do
you like him, do you like hismusic?
Speaker 2 (32:01):
I don't particularly care about his music.
I can't say that I reallywouldn't go out of my way for it
.
But I thought it was funny whenhe got that, his first award,
and they got him on on shot andhe's he's like in the background
, they're looking at his histrophy and slips out of his hand
and smashes.
Yeah, I just thought that wasfunny.
Speaker 1 (32:21):
I thought, well, I wonder he came out of prison.
He cleaned up his act and hewent for it.
He's like the guy who's havingall these things come to him
almost 40 years old when ithappens to other people, usually
in their low 20s.
So he goes.
I'm a walking testimony.
Don't give up.
You can do it any time in life.
Turn things around.
You can always turn thingsaround and be better.
So around and be better.
So the positive message forjelly is pretty good.
(32:42):
That's true, yes.
What was his real name?
Fat Bob, or just Jelly Roll,jelly Roll.
What's his real name?
Fat Bob.
Speaker 2 (32:53):
Fat Bob?
I don't know, honestly, I haveno idea.
Johnny's Big Boy?
Yeah, oh, that's it, denny.
Speaker 1 (33:03):
Denny Denny's.
Oh, is that really his realname, denny Denny Denny's.
Oh, is that really his realname, Denny.
Speaker 2 (33:07):
Denny, that's his real name, denny.
Speaker 1 (33:10):
Grand Slam.
Thank you, man.
Breakfast yes sir.
Exactly.
Speaker 2 (33:14):
That's what his ex-girlfriend says.
Yeah, grand Slam my ass.
Speaker 1 (33:21):
And so he did and ended up in jail.
It's like all of a sudden we'redeluged with jelly roll all
over the place.
His new song, I think it'scalled Save Me.
He goes why would you want tosave a scumbag like me?
So he's got Dr Govan in yourfavor, save me.
So I guess he's just singingabout his life where he was and
where he's come now.
So that's pretty good.
(33:41):
Every song sounds kind ofgospel-y to me, so I'm not
really into that too much.
Speaker 2 (33:49):
Not into gospel.
I'm sorry You'd never make itin this town, pal.
Speaker 1 (33:53):
When I come over, do you have to show me your gospel
album collection?
Okay.
Speaker 2 (33:56):
Oh sure man, yeah.
Yeah, I've got like three wallsof it, you know, and I've got
it in the basement and I've gotgold records down there too, a
bit like you've got.
Speaker 1 (34:04):
So mine's gospel, yeah every Sunday morning
Costello goes to church, listensto the choir.
The Murdoch Choir.
The Murdoch Choir yeah, that'sright, murdoch.
South Carolina Redneck Choir.
Speaker 2 (34:17):
Oh boy, I've got to love this place.
Well, I suppose you know, thecar.
Going back to the car thingagain, it definitely put a
rather large full stop oneverything.
So things are coming to aconclusion finally, you need to
go there.
Speaker 1 (34:34):
I will, I'll do it.
Get yourself a redneck fromyour church and just have them
do a laying of the hands on yourcar.
Heel it, heel it.
Speaker 2 (34:48):
Get this car out of this car.
Speaker 1 (34:52):
Crank right up man Heel it.
Get the car out of this carCrank right up man.
Speaker 2 (34:55):
Heel that car oh boy.
Just give me a sign.
Give me a sign.
Oh well, oh well, never mind.
Speaker 1 (35:03):
We'll see how it goes with the car.
Here's a question for everybody, okay, who already is sick of
the Trump trial?
I mean this is going to lastmaybe another four weeks.
You know he's miserable sittingthere At least.
At least we get some audio fromthe trial a little bit.
Speaker 2 (35:18):
We do.
You know, and here's the thing,this guy I mean he is just he's
got some intestinal problems.
This is what happens when youeat nothing but McDonald's,
which is what he does.
Speaker 1 (35:29):
Or KFC.
Speaker 2 (35:31):
Or KFC, or KFC.
But I remember watching thestate dinner he was giving to
somebody and it was McDonald's.
I'll throw him tons of money.
Speaker 1 (35:44):
That was terrible.
Yes, this is it.
If we can get somebody from thecourt case, let's go.
Speaker 2 (35:49):
Okay, yeah, he did, he started farting again, and
well.
Yeah, he did, he startedfarting again and well this is
what this is.
Speaker 3 (35:59):
So this is what happened.
All rise court is in session.
Speaker 4 (36:00):
The Honorable Judge Juan Mershon is on the bench.
Be seated.
The defendant will rise.
Speaker 5 (36:03):
Yes, your so called honor, which you have no honor,
because you're a fraud and ascam.
Speaker 4 (36:08):
Mr Trump, did you just fart?
Speaker 5 (36:09):
No, I didn't fart.
And you can't prove that Ifarted Because I've never farted
, ever, like no one ever didn'tfart.
Speaker 4 (36:16):
Uh yeah, you just did it again, mr Trump.
The court has receivedcomplaints that you are not only
threatening the members of thejury, but that you are also
falling asleep and relentlesslypassing gas.
Speaker 5 (36:26):
So that's fake news and I have never farted, so
you're a fraud and a scam.
Speaker 4 (36:32):
Mr Trump, you are taxing the court's patience with
your lies and your unbelievablyhorrible farts.
In fact, oh my God, it's uphere now.
That wasn't me, it was you.
Speaker 5 (36:41):
You are a farting judge who farts like no one has
ever farted before and you'reconflicted and you fart and your
daughter Shut the fuck up aboutmy daughter before I clap you
in chains and have you hauledoff to Rikers Island.
You chronic fart machine, judgeyou are a fraud and a fake and
a scam and this case shouldnever have been brought and it's
a witch hunt and sleepy JoeBiden is a.
Speaker 4 (37:05):
Mr Trump, mr Trump, oh, holy fucking.
Jesus.
Court is in recess.
Get some fans in here.
Speaker 2 (37:15):
Good stuff, good stuff.
I hear that's exactly the wayit went as well.
Speaker 1 (37:20):
Yeah, it's just one of the many things that we're
going to be featuring when weput together, within the next
month, the Trump channel.
Speaker 2 (37:27):
Okay, oh yeah, yeah, that's so much material.
Speaker 1 (37:32):
So the people who don't like him are going to love
it.
The people who love him aregoing to want to come kill us
for it.
You turn that damn thing off,but yeah, it's going to be a
good thing.
Speaker 2 (37:42):
Here was my thinking.
When I first proposed this.
You said you'll piss half ofAmerica off.
First of all, I don't thinkyou'll be half of America.
But then again I said, hey, Idon't care if they're pissed off
at me.
You know the others, the other50%.
I'd rather have them listen toour show.
Actually, I don't care.
Speaker 1 (37:59):
Our European audience is going to love it.
Our Saudi audience is going tolove it.
Speaker 2 (38:05):
Yeah, yeah, Well, I think you'll find it.
Europeans are going to English.
People are going to absolutelypee themselves.
Speaker 1 (38:12):
It's going to be so funny, yeah we get Trump songs,
we get Trump bits, we get AITrump, we get Trump jokes.
I mean, you name it, we getTrump 24-7.
Speaker 2 (38:26):
And not only that, but we'll both be wearing red
hair pieces while we do it.
But of course it won't be us.
We'll have to change our namesto something else.
You're Eric, I'll be.
Speaker 1 (38:37):
Don Jr.
Okay, You're Eric.
Yeah we can do that.
Sure, that's what we'll do.
Easy to play Eric Eric goeswhat.
Speaker 2 (38:45):
Oh yeah, that sounds like me.
That's my usual input to ourshows these days.
What?
Speaker 1 (38:52):
That's my usual input to our shows these days what Eh
?
And our first guest on theTrump channel will be Ivanka.
Speaker 2 (38:57):
Yeah, oh, okay, hang on here, I just lost you.
There you go.
Okay, I got you back.
Speaker 1 (39:04):
She's already committed and stuff, so it's
going to be fun.
Trump channel game coming soon.
It's going to be a good timeokay.
Then I'll get jelly to sing theopening, of course.
Speaker 2 (39:12):
Oh yeah, Good idea.
We could do that.
We're owed so much by so manypeople in the industry.
Yes we are.
It's time we started collectingsome debts, in my personal
opinion, that's right, we wantto collect on what's owed to us.
Talking of that, if you go towwwchristencostellocom, the
(39:35):
first thing that hits youactually it tries to hit you up
for money.
It's only $3 to subscribe, sowhy don't you go ahead and do
that and make us feel better?
You can, of course, spend more,but you know, one $3 donation
will buy me a peg for my nose.
You know when we have to talkabout the trail.
Speaker 1 (39:55):
And we can save a starving dog at the same time.
Speaker 2 (39:58):
Yes, yes, a farting dog as well, exactly.
W-w-w-w-w-w, w-w-w-w-w-w.
All right, h-t-t-t-s, w-w-w.
Speaker 1 (40:10):
Keep the show and keep up the love.
As we live in South Carolina,Costello, keep the rednecks
alive.
Speaker 2 (40:17):
I wish we could keep the car alive.
Speaker 1 (40:18):
You know what You're breaking up.
Speaker 2 (40:21):
You're breaking up really badly.
Speaker 1 (40:23):
Okay, so I'm going to squeal.
Here's Costello's mechanic Bendover buddy.
Speaker 2 (40:29):
Oh, I see that, that, that Get down there, boy, that,
that, that.
Speaker 3 (40:56):
That bridge is down Just there.
Hey, this is Chris.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
This is Costello, here we go.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
There we go.
There's been a death in thisfamily.
Oh, here we go, there we go.
Speaker 3 (00:27):
There's been a death in his family, oh man.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
It's your favorite relative too.
I can't believe this happenedto you.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
Go ahead.
You know what?
The good guy young, don't they?
I am bereaved.
I am so terribly bereaved.
Would you like to know why?
Speaker 1 (00:44):
Yes, go ahead and tell everyone let it out, and
you'll feel better.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
I will try and do it and be manly, without shitting a
tear.
They totalled my car, my littleMercedes.
Speaker 1 (00:58):
My little Mercedes.
We had the coolest two-seatMercedes.
Sometimes there'd be dog shitin the passenger seat and the
front seat, but even it was sucha cool car.
And then this place you took itto because you had someone kind
of t-bone you, I guess, rightand you've had it in the shop
(01:18):
since february and they took allthis time to determine just now
that your car is total and it'sgot to go.
How about three, four months?
What kind of damn place did yousend it into.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
Well, no, the place was okay.
The problem was the Mercedesdealership, and that's probably
what tipped it over the edge,and the other place that was
doing the bodywork.
They were fine, they were justcool.
But this is Traveler'sinsurance.
Who are totaling it?
Not my insurance, theirinsurance, have you gone?
Speaker 1 (01:51):
to look at the car.
They've done some body work.
It probably looks pretty good,so what's?
Speaker 2 (01:54):
the problem.
It looks absolutely bloodywonderful.
No, I haven't, but I think Ishall be doing so this next week
.
But you've got to look at itbefore they cremate it.
You know, Rub it in a bit morewhy don't you?
Speaker 1 (02:09):
I mean I decided my car would have pissed because it
was such a cool car.
It's a two-seater hardtopconvertible.
Costello would let that topdown, let his three hairs blow
in the breeze, I mean it wasawesome.
It was a wonderful little carand you know, the dog shit would
fly out and you'd clean out theseat for you.
You'd get three hairs of yoursflapping up in the breeze.
(02:31):
I mean, it was just like youcouldn't get any cooler than
that for South Carolina.
It was a great car.
Speaker 2 (02:37):
It's a Mercedes man I'd only seen one other in this
part of the world, and there'sone on the internet and it's
going for $21,000, which isabout four grand more than I
paid for mine.
The same year, same color,everything.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
Jump on it.
I'm well Get that insurancecheck and just go on over there
and just go okay.
Speaker 2 (03:01):
I'll take it, yeah, but it won't be for 21 grand
because I doubt I'm going to getthat out of the insurance.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
You can negotiate that.
Speaker 2 (03:09):
That's where you're earning.
Look money, Real money.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
Just go get cash or insurance, I'll come with cash.
Here's the cash price righthere, right now.
Speaker 2 (03:22):
And then, before I find out, that's been totaled as
well.
Speaker 1 (03:26):
But your insurance check.
You need to go look at your car, man.
I mean, this is like you've hadit in there since February.
That's three months of themworking on your car and all of a
sudden they go eh, we're justtired of working, we're going to
total.
Screw it, Bring on the next car.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
Yeah, we can't get the parts Bullshit.
Anyway, that's very sad, sadnews, and I shall move on in
life, I suppose.
Speaker 1 (03:47):
So you get your insurance money and you get
insurance money from the guy whoran into you, right?
Speaker 2 (03:53):
Well, I'll get insurance money from somebody.
Speaker 1 (03:55):
You put those two together your insurance and his
insurance and bingo you've got anew Mercedes boy, here we go.
That'd be nice.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
That'd be nice.
I don't know what you just did,but it just went all fuzzy.
Speaker 1 (04:12):
That's your new car.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
Oh, it's all fuzzy.
Don't do it again, I'll do itquieter.
Vroom vroom.
Vroom vroom.
Speaker 1 (04:24):
Okay, that's the sound of your car.
It's fuzzy because it's total.
Speaker 2 (04:30):
Yeah, well what do they do with total cars?
Do they just put them into anauction?
Speaker 1 (04:35):
Well no, they strip it for parts and then they
squish it.
They do the car cremation.
They'll take your tires,They'll take what's good from
the engine parts, all that youknow what.
They'll squish it and then ifyou cremate it off, it goes.
It'll be a little tiny squareblock.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
I'll tell you what.
There's new tires on there,there's a new battery in there,
the brakes are really.
I mean, I put top of the lineEnough.
This is not tool time.
Speaker 1 (05:05):
You enough.
This is not tool time, you know.
The problem is that you'regetting paid your insurance from
that.
You can't, I would sayotherwise, take the tires off
and stuff, but then they'llminus that from your check, so
it's theirs now You've got to gosee that man.
You just can't accept thisyayo's word like yeah, it's
total, it's over with.
Speaker 2 (05:21):
You've got to go look at it.
I've got to call into myattorney already.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
I mean, you know, so they at least you know.
Well, we'll see, anyway.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
Well, I'll deal with it.
Offer him again.
Do we cheat him in hell?
Is that it?
Yes, okay.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
No, it's the fine, mr Finkel.
He's a very good attorney, mrFinkel's name.
I'm going to start that again.
You might listen to this andget mad and drop the case.
Speaker 1 (05:48):
If New York attorneys come down to South Carolina to
handle cases like yours, okay,what's fine.
The other one Go get them, man.
Just don't take their word forit.
Go look at your car.
I shall.
I must definitely show them.
Show me why it's total.
Show me why it's total.
Show me why it's dead.
Show me why we made it.
You go look at it, boy.
Go get it, I'll get it.
Speaker 2 (06:09):
I'll get it, I'll go.
I'll go wearing my leatherjacket and riding my motorcycle
to be just a little bit edgy youknow, put on a fake tattoo and
have your sleeve rolled up.
There you go, not a tattoo, butyeah, face tattoo.
Speaker 1 (06:22):
Yeah, I have a skull and crossbones on with the
saying I kill auto workers.
You know and you see what youdo.
Speaker 2 (06:29):
Any insurance adjusters yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:31):
Yeah, go for it, man.
Just don't take the word for it.
Go for it, man.
Go get it, your car, it's agreat car.
Did you name your car?
I forgot that.
Do you have a name?
Speaker 2 (06:41):
for it.
No, I never did.
I don't do that for some reason.
Used to, when I was a kid, ourcars all had names.
Speaker 1 (06:50):
Like what.
Speaker 2 (06:53):
Ethel was one.
In fact, I think that's aboutthe only one I can remember.
I used to think Ethel.
Speaker 1 (06:59):
No, there was.
Speaker 2 (06:59):
Ethel.
There was another one which wasan Austin Beetle, not a
Volkswagen Beetle, an A30.
Don't remember what my motherused to give everything names
cats, dogs, people.
Oh sure, why not.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
I named my first car.
It wasn't like a name, I justcalled it the Magnet.
Everybody liked to run into it,so we called it the Magnet.
Oh okay, I was thinking shit,magnet.
But yeah, you feel like havinga wreck, feel like you're
hitting another car?
Yeah, hit me, it won't run intothe car.
There's the magnet.
Beat up my.
(07:35):
That one had to be totaled afterlike the sixth wreck, the last
one I stood in the driveway andwatched the tow truck tow it
away and tear running down mycheek.
I was so sad.
I love that car.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
Yeah, I know.
Well, you know, love the car,it's true, it's true.
I'm just going to go up to theinsurance guy and I'm right in
his face.
Speaker 1 (08:01):
That's it.
Go down there and intimidatethose South Carolina rednecks.
Okay, I'll just ride themotorcycle, that'll do it, and
then give them the British whatfor okay.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
Yeah say hey, come here, boy Bend over.
That's two of the best.
Speaker 1 (08:18):
You're going to deliverance the guy.
What are you going to do to him?
Speaker 2 (08:21):
No, no, no, no, I'm not poking anything up there,
I'm just wrapping somethingaround it.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:28):
Go do that.
Let us know how it goes.
Okay, it's such a good car.
It's really suck news, so letus know okay.
Speaker 2 (08:37):
It wasn't exactly a high-impact collision either the
slowest collision you ever sawbut there you go.
All right, Something goSomething.
Speaker 1 (08:48):
I can't just say I can't get the parts right now.
Something, go down there andfind out what it is.
I want an update on next week'sshow Promise.
Speaker 2 (08:55):
I promise, why don't you come down and be menacing
with me?
Speaker 1 (08:58):
I'd love to Welcome to the next.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
You ain't got shit else to do.
Yep, it's a slow weekend.
Well, good to know.
Ain't got shit else to do.
Speaker 1 (09:07):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (09:09):
It's a slow weekend.
Sorry, honey, I've got to go toSouth Carolina.
That's where the ladies need togo, got to go down there.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
It's been kind of outside of your death and your
family, your car.
It's been kind of a week allkinds of stuff going on,
recurring stories a lot.
You know, this is true.
The first thing we got to dothe Trump thing he was whining,
because first he begged thejudge.
I need to get off trial day soI go to my son's graduation.
The judge, the judge grantedtrump to do that.
(09:37):
I don't get to be with mybeautiful life milady on her
birthday.
Well, you know what she reallywanted to be with him on his on
her birthday.
She could have come to where hewas, which is new york, you
know, obviously, and she wantedto be around that orange turd so
she didn't bother going up.
But he whined about it, okay,and we were lucky we had the
Kristen Costello microphonethere, so we got the Trump
(10:00):
birthday whine.
Speaker 2 (10:01):
Should we do it now?
Shall we, shall, we do that.
Is that the birthday card?
Speaker 1 (10:07):
It's the birthday whine from Trump to Melania on
her birthday Wishing her a happybirthday.
Speaker 5 (10:13):
I'd like to read to you all from a letter I sent
today to my wife, melania, onher birthday.
To my dearest wife, melania,happy birthday, my darling.
I'm so sorry I can't be withyou on this special day, but I
am standing trial for falsifyingbusiness records and campaign
violations stemming from asexual relationship I had with a
(10:34):
porn star when you werepregnant with your I mean our
son.
And let me tell you, honey,that Stormy Daniels has got
titties for days.
I'm talking about titties likeyou'll never have Great big ones
.
She almost got me to have anerection but, as you know, I'm
impotent so it didn't last long.
But in any case, stormy's gotknockers like a porn star, which
(10:54):
she is.
But in any case, stormy's gotknockers like a porn star, which
she is.
And as you know, honey, my, mypurchase agreement from when I
bought you, specifies that I canraw dog as many famed whores as
I want, and you can't doanything about it.
You should have never marriedme if you wanted a decent man
with principles.
I mean, I hung out with JeffreyEpstein, for fuck's sake.
(11:16):
What did you expect?
And yes, my darling, they'regoing to put Karen McDougal on
the stand and she'll testifythat I had an extended affair
with her when your son I meanour son was an infant.
I romanced that woman and spenta lot of money on her and just
basically played you for a fool,which is what I think you are,
my sweet darling.
I had countless other affairsand sexually assaulted other
(11:37):
women and even raped them.
I'm a disgusting sexual deviantand a pervert and a habitual
abuser of women.
But on this special day, I wishyou the very best.
And, as you say in yourlanguage which, as you know,
means you probably shouldn'thave signed your life away back
(12:00):
in 2005, you, slovenian hagthere you go.
Speaker 1 (12:06):
I think Melanie had a great birthday because she
didn't have to be around him.
So happy birthday to you, youknow hopefully not soon to be
first lady again.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
Yeah, well, amen to that, and yeah, of course I mean
.
You know it's so obedient, hag.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
He must love her Trump.
Of course we're going to dothat a little bit later.
Again, we're going to bring upa really heavily watched.
They did a live event onNetflix.
The last time they did a liveevent was at the Chris Rock
stand-up concert, which is live.
Of course you can do it now,you can even watch it.
But Sunday they did theultimate roast of retired
(12:45):
football GOAT.
The best quarterback of all time, tom Brady, had a perform on LA
.
It was about God, 12,000 peoplein there to watch that.
It was some really stinkingfunny parts.
It lasted three hours, athree-hour roast.
I mean I thought man, it's waytoo much.
But you know what Each personwas funny.
Belichick was there, I got agrok.
(13:10):
Rob Wachowski being dumb, youknow, stinking hilarious.
But they really made fun ofGiselle a lot at the ex-wife
Giselle.
They call her Giselle.
You know just, you said you gotthe G is it's just a boyfriend?
I was just thinking fine, she'spissed off, she's gone.
You know, all I care about isrespect for myself and our
(13:34):
family and our kids and himgoing there and those people
just rip our family to shredslike that.
It's just awful.
It's a roast, damn it.
That's what they're about.
You know he had to sit thereand take it in person.
I mean they stuck it to him.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
This is what roasts are.
Yeah, so he got pissed off?
Did he walk off?
Speaker 1 (13:56):
No, he got pissed at one thing All the people making
fun of his ex-wife, giselle, hedidn't say a word.
He laughed, he rolled his eyes.
But when a guy one of theroastmasters made fun of his
ex-owner, robert Kraft, he gotup and told him you can hear him
on the mic going.
Don't bring up that shit againis what he said and what Ross is
(14:18):
talking about.
He's going.
And this part is true he goes.
When Brady was picked number199 in the draft, the sixth and
final round, he walked into MrKraft's office the owner.
He goes.
You picking me is the bestthing that you've ever done for
this franchise, which is true.
He said that.
Then he added on one extra linehe goes now.
Would you like a massage?
(14:39):
Remember Mr Kraft was you knowhe got.
He got into heat for solicitingprostitutes at a massage parlor
down in Florida.
That's where the massage jokecame in.
So Brady gets up and goes.
(14:59):
Don't bring up that shit again,because apparently him and
Kraft are pretty close.
The only reason he left wasbecause of Coach Belichick.
Speaker 2 (15:06):
So we'll be able to watch this on what Netflix?
Speaker 1 (15:09):
Oh yeah, it's on right now it's speaking.
Hilarious man.
It's just like Drew Bledsoe,who was the quarterback of the
Patriots, who got hurt, wasreally sick in the hospital.
That's when Brady took over anddid so well that Bledsoe never
was the starting quarterbackagain.
He said there's two things thatI have.
Even though you've got theseseven Super Bowl rings, all
(15:30):
these MVPs and you took myfucking job, he goes, but I've
got two things you'll ever have,one being the first draft pick,
which he was, and two, I justcelebrated my 28th wedding
anniversary.
You've already been divorcedtwice.
Oh really, you had the best set.
(15:51):
You got to watch this Gatel.
She goes.
So you got seven rings, buteight now because Giselle gave
hers back.
Oh, kevin Hart's going, tom,what part didn't you get?
She's going just so quiet.
That's eight times a day.
Didn't the light bulb go off?
You dumb shit?
He'd go.
Fuck you, tom.
All right.
Speaker 2 (16:15):
We'll have to watch that.
Speaker 1 (16:17):
That's going to be good for us.
Look how pretty he is.
One guy goes I want to fuckthat dimple on your face.
I mean it's just.
I mean it's out there, soyou'll love it.
Costello, it's great there's somany good drops we can pull
from that show.
We'll do so and we'll play somehighlights next week for those
who haven't watched it yet ordon't have Netflix Okay, all
(16:40):
right, you've got it.
You may not get all the jokesbecause a lot of them are in
reference to football and hiscareer and other players and
whatever.
So if you know football stuff,then it's all speaking funny
Some you may go what Over yourhead.
Speaker 2 (16:55):
What the hell are you talking about?
That's what I said.
Speaker 1 (17:00):
You're known as Mr Sports Guy Costello 2024.
Yes, indeed.
Speaker 2 (17:06):
Yeah, oh, I know.
At least I know what a quarteris now, I mean a quarterback is.
So you know.
Speaker 1 (17:13):
And who hikes the ball to the quarterback?
So you know.
And who hikes the ball to thequarterback?
Da-da-da-da-da-da-da.
Oh, that time.
Speaker 2 (17:24):
No Center, the center , oh, okay.
Okay, I know that now.
Speaker 1 (17:33):
Slowly but surely.
Slowly but surely.
He hikes the ball to Brady andhe's not going to pass.
He hands it off to the whoReceiver.
Nope, he's not passing.
So he gets hiked the ball bythe center.
He turns around.
He's not going to be a passplayer, so he hands the ball off
to the who.
Speaker 2 (17:55):
To the referee Running back.
Yeah, the running referee back.
Yeah, I just look at the.
Can they run, do they catch, dothey score?
Okay?
Speaker 1 (18:09):
Yeah, that's it.
Watch it for the beercommercials, I know.
Speaker 2 (18:15):
Hey, you know, well, I'm watching that UFSL thing,
that new football.
Speaker 1 (18:20):
I'm surprised you're watching that Because he gives a
crap People.
Will you wait and see Sometimes?
Speaker 2 (18:23):
good players.
I'm surprised you're watchingthat because he gives a crap.
It's like spring football.
Speaker 1 (18:26):
Ah people, will you wait and see you move?
Sometimes good players comefrom that who make it to the NFL
.
They leave, you know.
You remember Trump.
He saw a football team that wasa different league, the New
Jersey Generals.
That was his, wasn't it?
Yeah, yeah, that went bankrupt.
Like all the other stuff hetouches, he touches it and it
turns to crap.
Speaker 2 (18:48):
Oh boy, it sounds like my poor car, have you?
Speaker 1 (18:52):
been watching.
Speaker 2 (18:56):
I just don't know if I can continue.
I mean, you know Just invite meto the funeral.
Speaker 1 (18:59):
I'd like to go to that.
I can't pay my respect Afuneral for a car.
I can see pay my respect Afuneral for a car.
Speaker 2 (19:05):
You know, we can make it now you can have like a Go
ahead.
I'm sorry you could have like alow rider there, you know a
truck and put it up on that withflowers around it and just have
all the other Mercedes do thislong thing around it.
Speaker 1 (19:21):
I've got my classic car there, which is the Magnet
Part 2,.
Okay, I got a classic car overmy original car, which is the
Magnet, so now I've seen it inthe garage it's the Magnet Part
2.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
Oh really, people are hitting.
That too, no, no.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
The original one was the Magnet.
This one is in pristine shape,okay.
No one said that, no one saidthat and my wife dinged the door
, opening her car into the sideof it, except I had a heart
attack over it, so outside ofthat it's perfect.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
Oh, not your, the one that was in the shop forever as
well.
Speaker 1 (19:54):
Yes, yes, oh, I got mine back.
Okay, it was in there for fiveand a half freaking months that
I got it back.
We're going to have a funeralfor your car, which I have a
good name now that your car isgone.
It would be the Hot Red DogTurdmobile.
Speaker 2 (20:15):
Something very strange has just happened.
I've just heard the door close.
Speaker 1 (20:18):
You have an intruder.
That's your neighbor.
He's just come over to get abeer out of the fridge.
It might be, it might be.
Speaker 2 (20:23):
Boogie.
I haven't seen him in a while.
Oh boy, it looks stormy outside.
Maybe that's what it was.
The door opened again.
I have a cat.
She can now open and close thatback door.
Speaker 1 (20:36):
I have two dogs that do that Right now.
Where we are.
The bears are coming out andthey're hungry.
They're all over theneighborhood, so you can't leave
any food out.
If they think there's some foodaround, they just won't stop on
the outside.
They'll rip into your car,break into your house if they
think there's food around.
So you've got to be reallycareful.
But they're everywhere.
Speaker 2 (20:58):
I don't think we have bears here.
We have raccoons, which I'veonly seen one.
Yeah, no bears.
Spring comes out to rednecks inSouth Carolina.
Speaker 1 (21:09):
Right, it's redneck season.
Speaker 2 (21:12):
They come out for redneck season.
Speaker 1 (21:13):
Yes, no, it is the rednecks.
Do come out, it's redneckseason.
Speaker 2 (21:17):
Oh.
I don't know, I know nothing.
Speaker 1 (21:21):
Springtime is the rednecks come out of hibernation
from the winter.
They come out of theirbackyards in the trailers and
they're out there in the publicwalking the streets.
Redneck season man.
Speaker 2 (21:32):
Oh okay, I'll go get me a 12-4 or something and go
hunting.
Speaker 1 (21:40):
Get you a six-pack of beer and you see them walk
around and just go here you go,here you go, there we go.
Good to see you again.
Been a long winter, yeah.
Speaker 2 (21:52):
Sure has, boy.
You know what it's 90 degreestoday.
It's been quite warm here, as amatter of fact, and I think we
have a storm On the way as well.
I can see the Leaves coming offthe trees and the birds heading
Wherever they can.
Midwest see the leaves comingoff the trees and the birds
heading wherever they can.
Speaker 1 (22:07):
Midwestern storms are coming your way, man.
Do you guys have any tornadowarnings out there in South
Carolina?
Speaker 2 (22:14):
We have them.
But you know what, when I livedin Belton, texas, which is
where I moved from, they neverhad tornadoes or anything.
Well, I mean, we didoccasionally.
But this last week they've hadso many tornadoes in that area,
like Temple Waco that area, thatI mean, man, I'm surprised the
place is still there.
There's a little town inOklahoma, I think it's Enid,
(22:38):
that is now no more.
That wasn't a small town either.
Speaker 1 (22:43):
Yeah, my accountant lives in Bartlesville, oklahoma.
He was a mile from the more.
That wasn't a small town either.
My accountant lives inBartlesville, oklahoma.
He was a mile from me.
I would say Bartlesville.
Yes, he lost all of his treesand stuff, but his house is okay
.
Speaker 2 (22:52):
But he's okay, he's good.
Yeah, well, of course you knowabout houses and tornadoes,
don't you?
Speaker 1 (22:59):
Yes, I do.
Speaker 2 (23:00):
Yes, yes sir.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
That'd be right about a year ago?
Yep, about a year ago, and thatfour-hip at the house that I
bought lived in for quite a longtime.
Yeah, and so I understand that.
I was told yesterday that theoccupant of it now has moved
back in.
The house has been repaired, ittook me over a year and she's
back in there.
Speaker 2 (23:21):
Oh, is she indeed oh well a nice respite before she
goes somewhere else.
I don't know.
Look at that house, man.
I mean the wall, the main wall,was just buckled out.
I mean, it was really bizarre.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
But check the foundations.
They had to do foundation workand just put everything back
together.
Speaker 2 (23:44):
Let's just be positive and say, well, that's a
good thing.
And how's the chimney?
Did they reinforce that or didthey weaken it a bit more?
The?
Speaker 1 (23:51):
chimney was great, but that's what saved her Yep.
Speaker 2 (23:56):
So they didn't walk behind the chimney.
Speaker 1 (23:58):
Yeah, that did it.
Speaker 2 (24:00):
So your architectural plans that you drew up to kind
of weaken it a bit, didn't.
Speaker 1 (24:07):
She goes into my hidey hole and saved her life by
going to my hidey hole.
Well then she went to the pornroom and to get her life saved
with the F-4 trainer, Well,there you go.
Speaker 2 (24:19):
You should be feeling very happy about that.
You are be feeling very happyabout that.
Not many people get divorced,lose their house and then have
their house demolished by atornado.
Speaker 1 (24:35):
I mean come on, that is just like, yeah, all right,
it could have been a cause forcelebration, but it turned out
it was not.
Speaker 2 (24:42):
It wasn't no.
The hidey hole ruinedeverything, oh well.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
It did.
Speaker 2 (24:45):
We're going down a dark passage, rather like a
hidey hole.
Let's keep all the fewlisteners that we have left.
(25:20):
Let's say a great big hello toeverybody who emailed us, by the
way.
Speaker 1 (25:25):
Yeah, we appreciate that that's super Glad to have
you, man.
Glad to have you.
Speaker 2 (25:31):
I tell you what we're a hidden Saudi we are.
Speaker 1 (25:36):
We'll take the Saudis , yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:39):
You can actually.
We'll take anybody andeverything.
Speaker 1 (25:44):
At the Saudis.
We're getting people over inyour neck of the woods, over in
England, Scotland, yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:49):
Yeah, and of course in the south of America, south
part of London, we're at theredneck favorite station,
because we do pick up Trump fromtime to time.
But, the rednecks.
Speaker 1 (25:59):
I wanted to ask you about this have you been
watching American Idol at all?
Speaker 2 (26:03):
Yes, yeah, it's not a bad season.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
It's Katy Perry's last year on it.
So do you know who she wants toreplace her as judge?
And she's asked the guy.
The guy said yes, of course theproducers haven't asked him yet
, but he said he would do it andshe picked her own replacement,
but just the producers haven'tsaid yes yet.
You know who she wants, did youknow?
You don't know.
Speaker 2 (26:25):
No, I don't.
I didn't know that.
Speaker 1 (26:27):
You ready, I'm ready.
Jelly roll, oh come on.
Speaker 3 (26:32):
I only talk to God when I need a favor and I only
pray when I ain't got a prayer.
So who the hell am I?
(26:53):
Who the hell am I to expect asavior?
We'll be right back, but Iain't been living them worse
Swear.
I spend more Sundays Drunk offmy ass Than I have in church.
Hardcover King James Only beensaving dust On the nightstand
(27:15):
and I don't know what to say bythe time I'm a King James, I
ain't been saving dust.
Speaker 1 (27:22):
He was like a guest maker over there in Hawaii.
It just blew me away.
I gotta go back to churchbecause of him.
He can sell me anything.
He's my replacement.
I want Jelly Roll.
That would be interesting Jelly.
Roll has come out of nowhere.
This guy was in prison.
He was in prison tattoos.
He's overweight.
He got out.
He had one successful song.
(27:43):
He's got a new CD out.
He's like on a friggin' roll.
I mean, what do you think ofJelly Roll?
Do you like his music?
Do you like him as a?
Speaker 2 (27:50):
person.
It's not bad.
I mean, you know it'sdefinitely not.
I mean I think it's, I wouldsay, very clever, but well done
for doing what you've done andgetting to where you're getting.
What I would like to see iswhat I'd like to know is what
Lionel Richie would have to sayabout this.
I mean, there's a guy who hasbeen in my business all of them
when he was a guest pitcher.
Speaker 1 (28:10):
I think he liked it.
So Jelly has got new teeth now.
Okay, 350 pounds got a long wayto go.
You know His song you shouldhave paid attention to is called
I Only Talk to God when I needa favor.
But, Castello, if you didn'ttalk to God and said I just
saved my car, you might stillhave a car, but you didn't get a
favor well, maybe that'splaying on my car's radio as we
(28:33):
speak.
Speaker 2 (28:35):
We could have that as part of the memorial.
Speaker 1 (28:39):
Just think about those lyrics, isn't it true?
People only really turn to talkto God when they need something
.
Or please speak to yourselfthose lyrics, isn't it true,
people?
Speaker 2 (28:48):
only really turn to talk to god when they need
something.
You know, oh, if there is a god.
Actually I had this reallything, weird thing happen with,
uh, one of my cats who was intexas with me.
Unfortunately didn't make itout, but, um, he was very old
when we moved and he got lostand four days and I'm, I'm
looking for Bob.
Bob was incredible.
He was a wonderful animal.
Well, cats do that shit.
(29:08):
They leave for a while and comeback, right.
Well, I don't know if he wasplanning on coming back, but
anyways, yeah, sometimes he did,but at any rate.
So I'm walking around thislittle bit of the neighborhood
and somebody said, well, that'swhere all the cats go, I go, all
right.
Well, that's where all the catsgo, I go, all right.
Well then, here's hoping,because I really was missing him
(29:31):
more than I'm missing my car atthis point.
So I go around the corner andsaid, you know, just in that
kind of self-narrative you have,you know, you're thinking to
yourself well, you know what, ifthere is a God, bob will walk
around this corner right now.
No, he didn't do exactly that.
Speaker 1 (29:46):
So after the blue ping, there's bob there bob was
that he became a leader of theneighborhood gang and that's why
he hasn't been probably.
Speaker 2 (29:54):
He was huge.
Speaker 1 (29:55):
He was twice as big as my mother who's his cat to do
that.
My mom had a cat.
That cat would take off for aweek, two weeks at a time.
He'd come back with a rat orbird in his mouth or just
whatever he felt like comingback home, she didn't worry
about it, he'd just go for days.
Bob was old.
Speaker 2 (30:10):
Yeah, but he shouldn't be going.
He was old and he was anex-breeder, like the cat I have
now.
Same thing she's a breeder.
Speaker 1 (30:19):
He's a humper.
He's a whateder.
He's a humper.
He's a.
What A humper.
He's a breeder.
Come on, oh yeah, he was.
Speaker 2 (30:32):
So was Malone.
That's one way of getting apurebred cat and not having to
spend any money on it when theyretire them.
Speaker 1 (30:43):
But a dog guy.
I mean.
Picture yourself you're lookingfor your cat.
You're out there going Bob, hey, bob, bob, the cat.
When you call them, they justlook at you and go eh, fuck you,
you've got your calling yourdog.
Your dog's ears will perk upand they'll go oh, it's my
master.
And they come running and say,hey, hey, how you doing?
Will you call a cat?
If you leave me alone, I've gotthings to do.
(31:03):
I'm hanging out with theneighborhood kitty guys out here
we're going to spend the day.
Speaker 2 (31:07):
This is true, but I was a good mile and a half away
from the house for a start, along ways off right by the
railroad tracks, and it was oneof those magical moments.
You know, it was justinteresting, so there you go.
Speaker 1 (31:21):
You only talk to God when you need a favor, and he
came through for it.
Our Bob heard you say it and hegoes.
Jesus, this guy's desperate.
Let me show him what thefreaking cats do you know?
Speaker 2 (31:35):
I do think it's kind of interesting, though, that
Shelley Roll's story Well, whenhe won his Grammy last year, won
his Grammy last year.
Speaker 1 (31:43):
Man.
He's winning the big countrymusic awards coming up.
Later this month.
He's up for Entertainer of theYear, which is the biggie.
The guy's had a stinkingawesome year, the thing is do
you like him, do you like hismusic?
Speaker 2 (32:01):
I don't particularly care about his music.
I can't say that I reallywouldn't go out of my way for it
.
But I thought it was funny whenhe got that, his first award,
and they got him on on shot andhe's he's like in the background
, they're looking at his histrophy and slips out of his hand
and smashes.
Yeah, I just thought that wasfunny.
Speaker 1 (32:21):
I thought, well, I wonder he came out of prison.
He cleaned up his act and hewent for it.
He's like the guy who's havingall these things come to him
almost 40 years old when ithappens to other people, usually
in their low 20s.
So he goes.
I'm a walking testimony.
Don't give up.
You can do it any time in life.
Turn things around.
You can always turn thingsaround and be better.
So around and be better.
So the positive message forjelly is pretty good.
(32:42):
That's true, yes.
What was his real name?
Fat Bob, or just Jelly Roll,jelly Roll.
What's his real name?
Fat Bob.
Speaker 2 (32:53):
Fat Bob?
I don't know, honestly, I haveno idea.
Johnny's Big Boy?
Yeah, oh, that's it, denny.
Speaker 1 (33:03):
Denny Denny's.
Oh, is that really his realname, denny Denny Denny's.
Oh, is that really his realname, Denny.
Speaker 2 (33:07):
Denny, that's his real name, denny.
Speaker 1 (33:10):
Grand Slam.
Thank you, man.
Breakfast yes sir.
Exactly.
Speaker 2 (33:14):
That's what his ex-girlfriend says.
Yeah, grand Slam my ass.
Speaker 1 (33:21):
And so he did and ended up in jail.
It's like all of a sudden we'redeluged with jelly roll all
over the place.
His new song, I think it'scalled Save Me.
He goes why would you want tosave a scumbag like me?
So he's got Dr Govan in yourfavor, save me.
So I guess he's just singingabout his life where he was and
where he's come now.
So that's pretty good.
(33:41):
Every song sounds kind ofgospel-y to me, so I'm not
really into that too much.
Speaker 2 (33:49):
Not into gospel.
I'm sorry You'd never make itin this town, pal.
Speaker 1 (33:53):
When I come over, do you have to show me your gospel
album collection?
Okay.
Speaker 2 (33:56):
Oh sure man, yeah.
Yeah, I've got like three wallsof it, you know, and I've got
it in the basement and I've gotgold records down there too, a
bit like you've got.
Speaker 1 (34:04):
So mine's gospel, yeah every Sunday morning
Costello goes to church, listensto the choir.
The Murdoch Choir.
The Murdoch Choir yeah, that'sright, murdoch.
South Carolina Redneck Choir.
Speaker 2 (34:17):
Oh boy, I've got to love this place.
Well, I suppose you know, thecar.
Going back to the car thingagain, it definitely put a
rather large full stop oneverything.
So things are coming to aconclusion finally, you need to
go there.
Speaker 1 (34:34):
I will, I'll do it.
Get yourself a redneck fromyour church and just have them
do a laying of the hands on yourcar.
Heel it, heel it.
Speaker 2 (34:48):
Get this car out of this car.
Speaker 1 (34:52):
Crank right up man Heel it.
Get the car out of this carCrank right up man.
Speaker 2 (34:55):
Heel that car oh boy.
Just give me a sign.
Give me a sign.
Oh well, oh well, never mind.
Speaker 1 (35:03):
We'll see how it goes with the car.
Here's a question for everybody, okay, who already is sick of
the Trump trial?
I mean this is going to lastmaybe another four weeks.
You know he's miserable sittingthere At least.
At least we get some audio fromthe trial a little bit.
Speaker 2 (35:18):
We do.
You know, and here's the thing,this guy I mean he is just he's
got some intestinal problems.
This is what happens when youeat nothing but McDonald's,
which is what he does.
Speaker 1 (35:29):
Or KFC.
Speaker 2 (35:31):
Or KFC, or KFC.
But I remember watching thestate dinner he was giving to
somebody and it was McDonald's.
I'll throw him tons of money.
Speaker 1 (35:44):
That was terrible.
Yes, this is it.
If we can get somebody from thecourt case, let's go.
Speaker 2 (35:49):
Okay, yeah, he did, he started farting again, and
well.
Yeah, he did, he startedfarting again and well this is
what this is.
Speaker 3 (35:59):
So this is what happened.
All rise court is in session.
Speaker 4 (36:00):
The Honorable Judge Juan Mershon is on the bench.
Be seated.
The defendant will rise.
Speaker 5 (36:03):
Yes, your so called honor, which you have no honor,
because you're a fraud and ascam.
Speaker 4 (36:08):
Mr Trump, did you just fart?
Speaker 5 (36:09):
No, I didn't fart.
And you can't prove that Ifarted Because I've never farted
, ever, like no one ever didn'tfart.
Speaker 4 (36:16):
Uh yeah, you just did it again, mr Trump.
The court has receivedcomplaints that you are not only
threatening the members of thejury, but that you are also
falling asleep and relentlesslypassing gas.
Speaker 5 (36:26):
So that's fake news and I have never farted, so
you're a fraud and a scam.
Speaker 4 (36:32):
Mr Trump, you are taxing the court's patience with
your lies and your unbelievablyhorrible farts.
In fact, oh my God, it's uphere now.
That wasn't me, it was you.
Speaker 5 (36:41):
You are a farting judge who farts like no one has
ever farted before and you'reconflicted and you fart and your
daughter Shut the fuck up aboutmy daughter before I clap you
in chains and have you hauledoff to Rikers Island.
You chronic fart machine, judgeyou are a fraud and a fake and
a scam and this case shouldnever have been brought and it's
a witch hunt and sleepy JoeBiden is a.
Speaker 4 (37:05):
Mr Trump, mr Trump, oh, holy fucking.
Jesus.
Court is in recess.
Get some fans in here.
Speaker 2 (37:15):
Good stuff, good stuff.
I hear that's exactly the wayit went as well.
Speaker 1 (37:20):
Yeah, it's just one of the many things that we're
going to be featuring when weput together, within the next
month, the Trump channel.
Speaker 2 (37:27):
Okay, oh yeah, yeah, that's so much material.
Speaker 1 (37:32):
So the people who don't like him are going to love
it.
The people who love him aregoing to want to come kill us
for it.
You turn that damn thing off,but yeah, it's going to be a
good thing.
Speaker 2 (37:42):
Here was my thinking.
When I first proposed this.
You said you'll piss half ofAmerica off.
First of all, I don't thinkyou'll be half of America.
But then again I said, hey, Idon't care if they're pissed off
at me.
You know the others, the other50%.
I'd rather have them listen toour show.
Actually, I don't care.
Speaker 1 (37:59):
Our European audience is going to love it.
Our Saudi audience is going tolove it.
Speaker 2 (38:05):
Yeah, yeah, Well, I think you'll find it.
Europeans are going to English.
People are going to absolutelypee themselves.
Speaker 1 (38:12):
It's going to be so funny, yeah we get Trump songs,
we get Trump bits, we get AITrump, we get Trump jokes.
I mean, you name it, we getTrump 24-7.
Speaker 2 (38:26):
And not only that, but we'll both be wearing red
hair pieces while we do it.
But of course it won't be us.
We'll have to change our namesto something else.
You're Eric, I'll be.
Speaker 1 (38:37):
Don Jr.
Okay, You're Eric.
Yeah we can do that.
Sure, that's what we'll do.
Easy to play Eric Eric goeswhat.
Speaker 2 (38:45):
Oh yeah, that sounds like me.
That's my usual input to ourshows these days.
What?
Speaker 1 (38:52):
That's my usual input to our shows these days what Eh
?
And our first guest on theTrump channel will be Ivanka.
Speaker 2 (38:57):
Yeah, oh, okay, hang on here, I just lost you.
There you go.
Okay, I got you back.
Speaker 1 (39:04):
She's already committed and stuff, so it's
going to be fun.
Trump channel game coming soon.
It's going to be a good timeokay.
Then I'll get jelly to sing theopening, of course.
Speaker 2 (39:12):
Oh yeah, Good idea.
We could do that.
We're owed so much by so manypeople in the industry.
Yes we are.
It's time we started collectingsome debts, in my personal
opinion, that's right, we wantto collect on what's owed to us.
Talking of that, if you go towwwchristencostellocom, the
(39:35):
first thing that hits youactually it tries to hit you up
for money.
It's only $3 to subscribe, sowhy don't you go ahead and do
that and make us feel better?
You can, of course, spend more,but you know, one $3 donation
will buy me a peg for my nose.
You know when we have to talkabout the trail.
Speaker 1 (39:55):
And we can save a starving dog at the same time.
Speaker 2 (39:58):
Yes, yes, a farting dog as well, exactly.
W-w-w-w-w-w, w-w-w-w-w-w.
All right, h-t-t-t-s, w-w-w.
Speaker 1 (40:10):
Keep the show and keep up the love.
As we live in South Carolina,Costello, keep the rednecks
alive.
Speaker 2 (40:17):
I wish we could keep the car alive.
Speaker 1 (40:18):
You know what You're breaking up.
Speaker 2 (40:21):
You're breaking up really badly.
Speaker 1 (40:23):
Okay, so I'm going to squeal.
Here's Costello's mechanic Bendover buddy.
Speaker 2 (40:29):
Oh, I see that, that, that Get down there, boy, that,
that, that.
Speaker 3 (40:56):
That bridge is down Just there.
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