For many survivors, the deepest wound from coercive control is the loss of your connection to who you truly are. And for many women, especially protective mothers, your role as a mom becomes so entwined with your identity that life changes. Whether it's from abuse, family court challenges, or shifting seasons of parenting. It can all feel cataclysmic.
I’m joined by my friend and colleague, Stephanie Konter- O’Hara, LPC, to have an honest conversation about rebuilding identity after abuse. We explore how societal pressures, “supermom” expectations, and systemic biases in parenting roles impact women’s sense of worth. We also share tips for reconnecting with your authentic self, redefining your roles, and parenting in alignment with your values, even under the watchful eye of family court or in the face of counter-parenting.
We cover:
- Why abuse and coercive control so effectively strip away identity and autonomy
- The difference between “role” and “identity” in parenting for mothers and fathers
- How societal biases and family court systems reinforce perfectionism for moms
- The dangers of tying your worth to “performing” motherhood perfectly
- How to reframe parenting decisions through values rather than outside pressure
- Why connection, not perfection, creates lasting impact on your kids
- Navigating limited or supervised parenting time while keeping connection alive
- The role of community and shared stories in healing from relational trauma
Whether you’re still in the storm of family court or finally in a season where healing feels possible, this episode offers hope, practical tools, and reminders that you are already enough just as you are.
Connect with Stephanie:
- Instagram: @redefining_us_pod
- Website: www.wellmindedcounseling.com/redefining_us_pod
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