Faithful Narratives: A Sober Author's Perspective on Honesty and Recovery with Angelica Roberts

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Hello and welcome to the show.

(00:02):
My name is Nadine Mulvina andyou are listening to the Sober
Butterfly Podcast.
TSB is all about diving intoinspiring stories of personal
growth, resilience, andtransformation.
Today we have a remarkable gueston the show, miss Angelica
Roberts.
Angelica Roberts is someonewhose story and journey is not

(00:24):
only inspiring, but a testamentto the transformative power of
honesty and faith.
Something that really stood outto me in today's episode is how
we get into some of the nuancesof how alcoholism the disease
evolves over time, and it's notalways immediately apparent.

(00:47):
And so I really appreciatedAngelica shedding some light on
the progressive nature of thisformidable Adversary,
understanding that it's notmerely a choice, but it's
actually a complex and dynamicjourney, and we unpack some of
the labeling and stigma that isalso associated with walking
around calling yourself analcoholic.

(01:07):
Not always cute.
So I loved her fresh take onthat and how important it is to
just educate yourself aroundthese terms, especially if
you're going to label yourself.
What I find interesting is thatas an author, Angelica is
obviously really creative andshe's an artist, and there has
been such a longstandingconnection to this tortured

(01:31):
artist archetype that weromanticize in society.
So if you're interested inexploring the complex
relationship between artistictorment and alcohol as a means
of expression and escape, youalso wanna check out this
episode So whether you arepersonally affected by
alcoholism or maybe you'resupporting a loved one on their

(01:52):
journey, or simply seeking adeeper understanding with some
of the challenges involved,you're in the right place.
I do wanna issue a triggerwarning for today's episode.
I'm so glad you're here.
Let's get into today's episode.

Nadine (The Sober Butte (02:06):
Welcome Angelica Roberts to the sober
butterfly podcast.
We were just having a momenttogether backstage.
Kicking, catching up, getting toknow each other a little bit
better, but I'm so happy andhonored to have you here.
I would love to hear a littlebit more about your story and
I'm just so inspired by you asan author.

(02:27):
I'm an aspiring writer, so it'sjust so great to make
connections with women who arecreative and, creating a lane
for themselves in the publishingworld.
You have two books and so we'llget into like all of that.
Later, but I just wanted to likegut over you for a moment
because I'm just so honored tohave you here.
So how

Angelica Roberts (02:45):
are you Angelica?
I am wonderful.
Thank you for having me.
I was telling you, like yousaid, we kiki before your
platform has been such ablessing being able to see women
of color Who have the sameexperiences as me has been so
helpful in my recovery journey.
And I'm just so happy to talk toyou.
That's even one on one.

(03:05):
I'm like, I feel like afterthis, I'm probably going to be
calling you.
It's like, what you doing girl.
But

Nadine (The Sober Butterfl (03:09):
this is the beginning.
This is just this, first of all,this was long overdue and just
for people listening at home alittle bit of context.
So Angelica and I both went toFAMU together, Florida A& M
University for college.
And so I like to cite thatbecause obviously, as you
mentioned, like my platform isfor everyone, but I really like

(03:31):
to highlight women and women ofcolor, like their stories.
And I feel like.
Even though we didn't know eachother well, like we definitely
hung around in similar circlesat FAMU.
But I don't know, do you feellike, because I had another
guest, Faith Grant, episode oneof this podcast actually, she
also went to FAM, and we werejust talking, do you feel like

(03:52):
we had a typical collegeexperience?
Or what was your collegeexperience like?
Because I can tell you from myperspective, I was not focused
on the academic side of school.
I was very much interested inpartying and being on the scene.
So I'm just curious, since wehave, attended the same school,

(04:13):
I'm wondering if our experiencewas similar, or do you feel
like, you had more balance inyour life at FAMU?

I would definitely say I had balance.
I was so excited to leaveMaryland Leave my parents house
and get down to fam.
And I had a scholarship, ajournalism scholarship, which
kept me honest.
Like I, I had to do somestudying, but at the same time I
was still out in the streets andI was still enjoying, the edge
and the moon and all that goodstuff.

(04:43):
really quickly.
The edge and the moon are clubsthat may or may not still exist
in Tallahassee, Florida, wherewe went to school.
I definitely, had those times and was still
involved like around campus,SGA, J school for those who
don't know school of journalism.
J school, so I will say that.
I think I definitely had a verygood balance.

(05:04):
I was just so happy to be thereand I'm sure maybe we'll get to
it later.
But that's the 1st time.
I actually felt like I belongedand that people understood me.
And so.
It was just the best my dad usedto say, or my family would say,
is the best four years of yourlife.
Most of them, a lot of them wentto HBCUs and I'm like, ah, I
dunno.

(05:24):
But they were so true.
They were so right.
It was definitely the best fouryears, my case, five years

Nadine (The Sober Butterfly (05:31):
but it a little extra time.
Yeah, just a little bit, that'sincredible.
We have some common threadsthere.
I also felt like going to FAM Uwas the first time ever that I
felt like I belonged.
But I felt like I found mypeople, but in the same breath,
it definitely sounds like youwere more grounded, more focused

(05:51):
than I was while there.
I will say, though, I stillsurface level, like, to the
outside people that didn't knowme well.
You could presume one couldassume that I was someone that
somewhat had my stuff together.
I was also involved with studentgovernment.
I was a student senator.
I made decent grades and wasable to graduate cum laude, but

(06:12):
behind the scenes, my life wasessentially in ruin, in
ruination.
It was very much like thisduality that co existed for me.
And so I like to always tellpeople my situation with
alcohol, like my very firstencounter with alcohol was
problematic.
The first time I ever got drunkat 13.

(06:35):
Was a problem and it was thisidea that like immediately I
knew that alcohol was somethingthat I couldn't manage It was
very much.
I want all of it and I want tofeel something i'm wondering for
you angelica What were some ofyour earlier associations or
encounters with alcohol?
Was that something that?

(06:56):
You From a young age hadexposure to like me at 13, or
was it something that you foundlater on in adulthood?

Yeah so I actually found it at FAMU so
growing up my immediate family,my dad, if he's watching a
football game, maybe he, drink acouple of beers, but it was
nothing in excess.
Nobody in my immediate family, Iwould say we're heavy drinkers.
Now, fast forward, there weretimes like, middle school, high

(07:26):
school, I would, try to skipschool and I remember trying to
raid my dad or raiding my dad'sliquor cabinet, me and a couple
of friends.
I think we were in 7th grade,they came over the house and I
tried.
I'm like, well, this is nasty.
I don't want any more.
And I would go to like highschool parties and there would
be beer around, but it was neveranything that I was interested
in until college.

(07:47):
And in college, my first, Iguess, experience was freshman
year.
They threw me a birthday partyin October and there was alcohol
there.
And I enjoyed it at the time.
It was still social for methough.
Now, the moment that it became aproblem was partly why it took
me five years to graduate.
2009, right after I crossed, Ipledged my sorority.

(08:11):
I didn't have any money to goback to school.
My scholarship and I was out ofstate coming from Maryland.
I didn't have money to stay inschool.
So I had to take off a semester.
And just like you, I was votedto be a student senator at Just
Pledge, I was on top of theworld.
Grades were good, but now Ican't come back fall semester.
And so I went back to the D.

(08:32):
C.
Maryland, Virginia area workedfor a semester, and then I
returned.
What was it?
Spring 20.
2010, and I resumed my positionin the student Senate, but in
addition to it was I was an airforce at Florida state.
Now, finally, after all theseyears of trying to find myself

(08:54):
growing up, following the deathof my mother when I was 11
moving around so much because myfamily, my parents were in the
military my safe haven hadbecome FAM, but now here I am
back, after taking that leave ofabsence, trying to reconnect
with my line sisters, trying tofind my space again in the
student senate.
And then now I have this newbeast of ROTC at Florida State,

(09:19):
these new kids, right, that Idon't know, I had formed
relationships at FAM, but not atFlorida State.
Well, it went from beforedrinking to be social to now I'm
drinking to have confidence.
Like I was drinking before.
Six in the morning before PT orafter PT before drill at Florida

(09:39):
State, because I wanted to belouder and I wanted to blend in
with the other kids.
I was super shy.
I was always shy.
And for me, alcohol became apart of my confidence, what I
needed to do to be confident.
When I started making speechesand doing all that, I had to
then take a fireball shot beforeall of these things.

(10:01):
And, I am an alcoholic and forme, I believe I've always been
an alcoholic, even though as akid, I wasn't drinking the
symptoms and the disease showedup in those moments in college
though, and then it's aprogressive disease.
So from then on, it just gotworse.
So although my time at FAM, Isay best four years that stint,

(10:24):
not stint, but that time atFlorida State where I was once
again brought to thatuncomfortable space, like I had
been my whole life before FAM, Idecided to drink to try to cover
that up and be more confidentagain.
So I'd say that in long storyshort that was actually a
pivotal moment in my drinkingcareer.
That's when I realized, like, Iwas dependent on alcohol to get

(10:46):
outside of myself.
Yes,

and I can relate to that as well.
A lot of people, I think, lookat me and they think I'm super
outgoing, and I actually am not.
I'm more reserved than peoplebelieve or think.
I even like to believe I waspainfully shy as an only child
growing up and like, if you evenlooked at me, I would blush.
But when I got to FAMU as well,like, my 1st encounters being on

(11:13):
campus was drinking and going toparties and I like that version
of me.
There's this interesting episodenot to like.
Don't write too much, butthere's this episode Huberman
lab.
Do you know him or follow aHuberman lab?
He's amazing.
He's like this scientist and hehas a neuroscientist and he has
this podcast called Huberman labBut there's this one particular

(11:34):
episode I will plug it in theshow notes and I will also send
it to you because it reallyhelped transform the way I
Recognize the symptoms ofalcoholism because I also
identify with being an alcoholicand it's this idea He gave this
anecdote where it's likeobviously we know the
categorization or the categoryof alcohol is a depressant
however, if you are someone thatGets turned on he uses this like

(11:59):
quote turned on like a switch ifalcohol makes you more alert and
Energetic and outgoing that'sactually pretty dangerous
inherently It means that youhave something within you that
it's almost like The oppositeshould be happening.
Like if you think about if youdrink much you should be tired.
You should be sleepy but peoplewho tend to have You know, the

(12:20):
expressive gene of alcoholismhave those symptoms.
So I can very much connect tothat.
I appreciate you, sharing thatbecause I think so many people
use alcohol as a sociallubricant

to connect

with people.
To, derail uncomfortablesituations or feelings.
For sure.
And one other thing you said,like for people to PTs, what is
PT exactly?
Physical, like physical

exercise physical training.
So in the mornings beforeeverything else drill for ROTC,
we would do pt.
So we'd go out there andexercise and run and do all

Nadine (The Sober Butterf (12:56):
that.
So that's me, literally methinking like GI Jane, like
you're out there runningpushups, drugs.
Yeah.
And you drink

before that.
That's exactly what it's.
Yeah, sometimes I would drinkbefore then or I would wait.
So after PT, I'd go home and puton my uniform because we would
have flag duty.
So I'd have to put the flag upand we'd march around Florida
State or, just do differentactivities like that.
And sometimes I would have toleave.
And so here I am around thesekids.

(13:24):
Again, I'm familiar with FAMUand I have friends at FAMU, not
so much Florida State, which isbigger.
I don't see people, as manypeople who look like me, I'm
more uncomfortable.
So to get outside of myself Istarted, drinking before drill
time, especially because Iwanted to say, really loud.
And I thought that drinking wasthe way for me to get outside of

(13:45):
myself and not be so shy and beenergetic and on my stuff.
And man, like, even when I thinkabout that time, it was just.
Do you feel like

other people, A, knew what was going
on?
So let's isolate that tospecifically other people in
ROTC.
Were other people drinking withyou or did they know that you
were drinking?
No.
No.
Okay.
So you were already being ableto veil or keep this mask up.

I was, at least I thought I was now
looking at it after so long ofdrinking, thinking you're hiding
something, but people may haveknown, they may have smelled it
on me and not said anythinglooking back on it.
So I was on a ROTC scholarshipand I didn't commission to go
into the air force because wehad to go before a board and

(14:37):
basically tell them like why wedeserve, to be.
Officers in the military.
I remember going before theboard.
I was drunk, I was drunk and Ijust started crying in front of
the board of people.
I mean, there's a colonel there,there's a major there, and it's
like four or five people at theboard and I'm telling them my

(14:57):
experience and next thing I'mjust crying.
And I don't even remember what Isaid to them.
I just remember.
I'm like, dang, do they know atthat?
Did they know that I was likeand nobody ever said anything.
And when I got out of, I stillhad another year at FAMU.
And I became known as.

(15:20):
A partier in my sorority, wecall it kick it.
So I'm the one that will getpeople to come to the parties
and do all that stuff.
And it became like a runningjoke, at that point, people
realize like, I like to drink,but nobody ever challenged me on
it or said anything.
At the same time, I was stillable to keep my grades up.

(15:40):
I was still able to fulfill myresponsibilities.
At that point, it was still fun.
Maybe after this, my friendswould be like, girl, it wasn't
always fun.
Like, maybe there's some storiesthat I don't know.
There definitely have blackoutmoments, so in my head, I was
having a good time, but in thedisease of alcoholism we have
truths and falses.

(16:01):
That, that lies we tellourselves, so very much could
have had some rough moments andnot remember, but overall, I
think I was a good time.

And that sounds well under the
unknown because I can't tell youhow many blackouts I have and I
will never know.
The extent of how much Iembarrass myself, God bless
anyone that had to deal with mein those moments, because one
thing I will say is I had peoplethat looked out for me, even if
they were drunk, I would alwaysbe the most drunk in the group,

(16:33):
but, it's just this idea thatlike, I felt comfortable, such
safe, although I was, forgoingmy personal safety.
I don't trust the people that Iwas with.
However, that's not fair toother

people It's definitely not, and I did the
same thing.
I definitely did the same thing.
So,

From the outside looking in, you have
all of these things going foryou.
You graduate and I like to usegraduation because that's
usually such a milestone forpeople.
You matriculate back into thereal world.
So what was that like for you?
And at what point do you feellike your drinking went from?
Oh, this is cool.

(17:11):
This is like helping myconfidence.
This is helping me connect withpeople to, oh, maybe I need to
take some inventory and mayberealizing that you actually had
a problem with drinking.

So I didn't think I really had a problem
with drinking.
So my whole life I've had mentalhealth challenges dating back to
11 when my mother passed andI've been in grief counseling.
I've always been in therapy.
And so for me at one point I wasthinking that I'm drinking
because I'm depressed.

(17:45):
I'm drinking because of mymental health.
And I didn't realize at the timethat there are two separate, And
that me drinking just made mymental health worse, honestly.
And so when I graduated, Icouldn't find a job print
journalism, which is what I wentto school for was suffering.

(18:06):
We had bloggers and everything.
So that was an added, I'm like,wow, I did so well.
I had these internships now Ican't get a job.
So what did I do?
I moved in with my greatgrandparents in Virginia and
worked at a hotel part timeuntil I found a job.
But at that time, it stilldidn't click because now I'm
working in D.
C.
later on.

(18:26):
And they had happy hour.
Oh my god, this is everything,okay?
I worked at Living Social rightafter college after I couldn't
find a job for about six months.
I got hired there.
And they would allow us todrink.
At like 3 p.
m, 4 p.
m, we can go downstairs in thebasement and we'll get our, like
red wine and we can bring it upto our workstation and we can

(18:49):
drink and we're having a goodtime.
Okay, so not only am I drinkingat work and it's okay, but then
after work, I go hang withfriends for happy hour.
So it was okay.
Now I noticed though.
I did notice that I was having aproblem because there were times
when I would get to work earlyand sneak downstairs where they
kept the wine and stuff, and Iwould drink before people came.

(19:12):
I see, so I would be drunkbefore work and then 3 o'clock
came when it was okay for us todrink and I would drink again.
Like, I hadn't been drinkingsince first thing that morning.
So I had done so many thingslike that, but still, I didn't
think it was a problem.
I still didn't think it was aproblem.
I thought that I would be ableto stop if I wanted to, but

(19:34):
because society was telling meit was okay, happy hours going
out on the weekends work events.
I was like, Oh, this is just asocial thing.
And I was lying to myself still.
So that went on for years until2020 came and I had to take a

(19:55):
long look in the mirror becauseno longer did I have the excuse
of it's social.
Because I had nowhere to go.
I'm stuck in the house now andso that's when things hit the
fan was 2020.
And now a quick word from ourpartners.
It really feels like you'rehaving a moment, pun intended.
When you're sipping on thelovely and refreshing moment.

(20:17):
Now, what I love about moment isthat not only does it taste
delicious, I have my favoriteflavors.
I love the blood orange.
I love the spicy mango, but it'salso good for you, which is
exactly what I need in my liferight now as I'm in my early.
30s.
It's infused with L theanine,which is great for mental
clarity.

(20:37):
It also is packed withashwagandha, which is great for
helping to fight stress.
It's made with all of thesenatural botanicals, which really
enhances your vitality.
It does not contain any addedsugar.
It's caffeine and of coursealcohol free and you can
purchase it in still orsparkling.
I love a good sparkle moment sothat's typically the route I
take.

(20:58):
In the morning it's great for aboost to start the day versus in
the afternoon if you want tobeat that afternoon slump and
enhance your mental clarity orif you just need like a simple
pick me up like for me I love tohave a moment after the gym
versus going into the gymbecause it just really helps.
Reenergize me.
And then in the evening if youwant to wind down after a long

(21:20):
busy day and enjoy a deliciousmocktail without the hangover,
then Moment is great for thattoo.
One of the best parts for mewith Moment is I feel like it's
a really conscientious brand.
They donate 1 percent of alltheir sales to mental health non
profits so you can feel goodabout supporting greater causes
as well.
Head over to drinkmoment.

(21:41):
com and use my code TSB23 toreceive 12 percent off your very
first order.
Let's be moment buddies.
We can both have momentstogether.
Um, I didn't do as much in yearone and the things that
I

want to unpack a little bit of what
you shared because you said somemajor gems there.
This idea that society validatesso much of our Problematic
drinking, even if it doesn'thave an official label, even if
you're not say an alcoholic,you're a gray area drinker,
whatever it may be.
I felt connected to that piecebecause my whole environment,

(22:17):
right?
Once again, I'm choosing someoneto place myself in these
environments, but myenvironments are essentially
telling me it's okay.
Everyone's drinking.
What's the big deal.
But I think Inside, internally,subconsciously, I did recognize
that maybe I was still doing toomuch, like, even though everyone

(22:38):
was doing it, like, I also hadthose aha moments, like, you
mentioned, you go to work alittle early now, so it's like,
you already have the greenclearance to drink at work, but
like, now you're pushing theenvelope even more, like, I
would do similar things likethat, where it's like, I already
have Know that everyone's goingto be drinking, but I'm going to
pre pregame extra hard or I'mgoing to take even more drinks.

(23:00):
I think the real danger for meis that once I am drunk, the
threshold has been completelybreached and now I'm more
susceptible to trying andexperimenting with drugs and the
risky type behaviors.
So that's for me, just toparallel your story.
I know you're getting to 2020,which is like the biggest.

(23:21):
Moment pivotal moment and Ithink so many people's recent
life.
Yes, exactly.
So tell 2020 comes and you'reforced to address some of your
problems because what else areyou supposed to do at that time?

Exactly right.
I mean, 2020 came and.
Again, I had, I wasn't, I'vebeen in therapy and I'm a big
retreat girl, like meditationretreat.
I've always been like that.
Church girl, like I would go tochurch.
Now the issue was I would dothese things cause it felt good
in the moment, but I wouldn't gohome and do the work.

(23:56):
Oh, it felt good in the moment.
It was like a checkbox, like acheckmark in my boxes.
But I wasn't.
Practicing what I was learning.
And so when 2020 came around itwas fun for a few months.
I was ordering DoorDash likecrazy and they wouldn't make me
buy food in order to buy thealcohol.

(24:16):
And I'm like, throw in acroissant, like throw in an
appetizer.
So I'm just getting me theliquor.
And it just got like, the daysjust got long.
I talked to my therapist, I waslying to my therapist.
I told her, I'm drinkingexcessively.
But she's still not recognizingthat it's a problem because I'm
not being totally transparent.
Instead, I get an emotionalsupport dog.

(24:38):
I go on my retreats.
I, attend service online.
And until one day I decided totake a personal trip to Austin,
Texas.
And I'm like, Oh, just get awayfor the weekend.
Right.
So I go to Austin.
I'm like, I'm not going to drinkthis weekend.
Ended up going out to the poolwith like three guy and two

(25:00):
girls that were at the pool andstarted drinking the next day.
I I had work.
It was Monday.
And I was working for an airlineat the time.
So I had free flights and I hadmissed my flight.
So I'm freaking out because Ioverslept.
I have a meeting all day.
I got to get back to Dallas,which is a few hours away from
Austin.
So I Ubered all the way backfrom Austin to Dallas, all the

(25:25):
way back.
And when I got home.
One of my best friends, myfriends were calling me, they
were like, are you good?
I'm like, yeah, what are youtalking about?
Blacked out in Austin, totallyblacked out.
They're telling me that when Igot home, I worked for the day.
Then I laid down and I woke upbecause there was a loud banging
noise.
And usually my dog would bark ifsomebody was at the door, even

(25:47):
he was knocked out.
So I get to the door and there'spolice right there.
There's police.
At my door and my best friendwas with them.
It was a welfare check because Ihad said some crazy stuff when I
was in Austin, when I was drunk,not only that, but my friend she
was like, what really happened?
And I'm like, what do you mean?
I don't know.

(26:08):
Come to find out people found medrunk in an elevator.
I don't remember that.
Yeah.
And apparently like my friend Ihad called some friends and was
talking, crazy.
And they called the hotel andthe hotel kind of told them they
found me in an elevator and Igot home and, Ooh, my God.

(26:28):
Like when I think about theharmful position I put myself
in, anything could havehappened, I'm grateful that the
hotel made sure I got to my roomsafely, but that, that was
eyeopening.
And at that point I lived awayfrom family for so long that
they didn't really know what wasgoing on.
They'd get drunk calls from mesometimes, but they didn't know

(26:50):
the extent of my drinking.
And that was definitelyeyeopening.
And.
For my front, my friendships, myrelationship started to really
suffer.
And yeah, I mean, that wasprobably the moment when I had
to look at myself like, well,hearing about what I did in
Austin by myself, I'm like, Ohmy God.

(27:12):
Like, I'm thank God

I'm alive.
Yeah, thank God.
And I think the real intel iswhen you tell yourself or you
set that boundary for yourself.
You're like, Oh, I'm not goingto drink this weekend.
She's going to be a little cuteweekend in Austin and the end of
being one of the most dangeroussituations that you could
probably put yourself in now thepolice are at your door because

(27:34):
your friend is afraid that likeyour safety and well being is,
in jeopardy.
Yeah, so I had a similarsituation.
I won't go into full detail, butsame thing.
I'm not going to drink again.
I had two weeks of sobrietyunder my belt, went to, of all
places, Atlantic City, and dideverything under the sun.
And that was like, in anutshell, my aha, I'll call it

(27:57):
like a come to Jesus momentbecause I'm like, You can't even
respect yourself to yourself,right?
You say you're going to dosomething because before, like,
it was always like a setparameter, like, oh, I'm going
to take a little break for dryJanuary or a little two week
detox.
But it's like, you couldn't evengo two days a weekend.
Like, come on.

(28:20):
That is sometimes a beautifullesson, I guess.
But as you're living through it.
It's terrifying.

It's very terrifying.
And I'm like you, where you saidthat you've always had friends
around who've had your back.
That was the same with me.
I've always had people lookingout for me, making sure I was
okay.
Well, now this solo trip, it'sjust me against the world.
And so that was that's when Ithink I finally came to terms
with no, I'm not drinkingbecause I'm sad and depressed.
I'm drinking because I have aproblem.

(28:50):
Yeah, I have this mental healthstuff, but I also now have this
alcoholism and I actively triedgetting help for it.
But I still thought I couldcontrol it until 22 again, when
my family started getting reallyconcerned and I stayed with my
grandmother for a few months andwas sneaking and drinking.
Then she told me a story.

(29:12):
That I guess I had been drivingand I came home really late and
I almost drove through her

garage.
Oh my God.

Yeah.
Yeah.
Cause I made amends to her andand I asked her, I'm like, is
there anything else?
And she said that was terrifyingfor her.
And I didn't even know thathappened again, blackout.
And I'm, putting other people indanger now at this point, well,
been putting people in danger,but.
You had

Nadine (The Sober But (29:37):
mentioned that some of your relationships
suffered, and I was just curiousif you could go a little bit in
depth there because, and forthose who are not familiar,
like, making amends isrecommended as 1 of the 12 steps
or it's a part of the processand that's a part of associated
with Alcoholics Anonymous, and Iwas just in

a meeting last week, and It was interesting

because someone said, like, did you make
amends to yourself?
Right?
Like we make amends to otherpeople for some of the damages
that we cause, emotional,physical, financial, whatever.
But do you or did you makeamends to yourself and how were
your relationships when you werereally in the throes of your
suffering and your addiction?

Oh my God, no, I've never made amends to
myself, but I'm glad that youbrought that up because I need
to do that.
When I

heard it, I was like oh, yeah.
Yeah.
It's just as important.
Honestly, like your relationshipwith self is probably one of the
most important relationshipsthat you maintain.
We get so like in the weeds.
As we should, because we careabout people that care about us
and we've hurt people along theway, but like you citing that

(30:52):
story with your grandma is aperfect example of that, but in
general, how are yourrelationships during this time?
Did you feel like.
You lost any friends?
People talk about losing friendsin sobriety sometimes.
I'm wondering, did you losefriends?
When you were suffering withalcoholism,

I did, I lost my friend that brought the
police to my door.
We've been friends since FAMU welived together in a few States.
I mean, we were like joined atthe hip and we're no longer in
communication.
Shortly after that moment, whenthe police came she distanced

(31:30):
herself, which I understand, Ireached out to again, like make
amends.
With her and she isn'tinterested at this time which I
completely understand respectBut yeah, my other relationships
did suffer a bit, I put peoplein uncomfortable situations
gratefully Everybody hasaccepted my amends.

(31:55):
So I've made amends to so I wasa part of a women's recovery
program called the Magdalene'shouse here in Dallas, and in
that program, it was a 3 monthprogram that I started in
January 2021, 3 months.
And we had a graduation andafter all, like my graduations

(32:15):
from middle school, high school,college and accolades that I've
gotten, it was so beautiful tosee virtually all my friends who
showed up, line sisters, familyfrom all over, like the women in
the recovery house, they werelike, Whoa, like you have a lot
of representation here and I'mlike, it's nothing but God.

(32:35):
At one point I really took me.
My support system for granted Itook these people for granted.
I didn't I always felt like Iwas alone Nobody understood me.
Nobody cared and since to lookout and see all in my dad He was
in town for my graduation.
He lives in Ohio now He was apart of the family support group

(32:56):
every Wednesday My aunt she wasthere.
She stopped drinking and supportfor me And so overall, the
support and the love despite allthe harm and uncomfortability
that I've caused so many peoplethey still show me grace in
love.
And I mean, it's just it's ablessing.

(33:16):
Cause I know not everybody doeshave that.
And I did lose my best friend.
I don't want to say lose.
That relationship did suffer andI do, I'm accountable for that.
But I am very grateful that inthe whole, I've been well
received and loved on.
You have so many

Nadine (The Sober Butter (33:33):
people who love you, and I think the
most difficult, because I'vealso lost people based off of my
past actions and my poor choiceswhen I was drunk blackout,
whatever it may be.
But I always, still give graceand thanks, not even just give
grace to who I was then, butalso just give thanks for like

(33:55):
that relationship.
Period.
The fact that I have them in mylife, or that season of life,
and who's to say, like, what thenext season will bring, is
beautiful to me.
And I have to, like, you alreadysaid it, like, you have to
respect people's choices, theirboundaries.
And it doesn't mean the love islost.
It's just like, right now, maybenot the best.

That's why I had to stop myself from saying I
lost a friend because, like yousaid, the seasons, who knows,
maybe we'll reconnect later inlife.
Maybe we'll finally be able tohave a conversation if she's
open to it.
I'm still in my prayers andstill thinking, about our
friendship and her.
So who, who knows?
That's

Nadine (The Sober Bu (34:32):
beautiful.
I'm curious because you are anauthor.
And you're a creative andthere's such a strong link.
A romanticized link, I will say,just to make that clear between,

I know exactly

right.
Creativity being an artist and.
drinking alcohol.
And I used to think, I was morecreative just like I used to
think I was more outgoing,whatever, funnier, all the
things under the influence.
How has your art been reflectedor how has it changed since

(35:07):
getting sober versus drinkingand writing?
Because there is this like,right?
There's this like, to like thisidea that like, You have to be a
tortured artist and like thatcoming away was a raging
alcoholic.
So I don't know.

Yeah.
That whole getting outside ofyourself, which I did, for so
many years to.
To try to tap into this spacethat wasn't coming to me freely.
I definitely did drink.
I said that I was a betterwriter when I drank.
I need this.
And then what ended up lookingat it, I would drink and then
not write.
Like I'd be so turned up, I'dblack out and go to sleep.

(35:46):
Like I didn't even write.
So

that's amazing.

I mean, and then like in the beginning, so I
grew up reading, I grew upwriting.
That was my thing.
My first published poem, I waslike 10 or something.
At FAM before I started drinkingheavily in J school.
I was still writing.
I was still.
Loving it.
And then all of a sudden this,alcohol had such a pull on me.

(36:10):
Now I'm thinking I'm a betterwriter when I'm drunk, but I was
drinking, I was reading andwriting well before ever really
introduced to alcohol.
And so, yeah, I was.
And again, that was, that's thelie that I was telling myself.
And so I was scared going into,I did write my first book
Vendetta that came out in 2017.

(36:32):
I was very much drinking duringthat time.
And I started that second bookright after at that time.
I was also in grad school.
Yeah.

And so

I started writing the second one shortly
after Vendetta came out, theroot cause, which you just
showed.
And again, I was drinking.
I never could finish a chapter.
Same thing with grad school.
I was in grad school and gettingout of classes because I
couldn't concentrate because Iwas so busy drinking and doing

(37:13):
whatever I was doing.
And finally, like, when I wentthrough recovery in 2021.
And I had those honestconversations with myself, and I
realized that I was, I had beena good writer, and I realized
that the stuff that I had beentelling myself for the last 10
years were lies.
And so really being able to takea deep look in the mirror Was so

(37:35):
pivotal in me finishing thesecond book and coming out with
it, and I love Vendetta but Ilove the root cause because I
did it without you know this aidof alcohol like I was able to
push through And tap into a newvoice as a writer that I hadn't
tapped into yet And I'm justvery proud of it.

(37:58):
I'm proud to say like I did itwithout the liquor, like, and
that I wasn't a portrait artistfor this one.
And That's so beautiful.

Nadine (The Sober Butterfly) (38:08):
I feel like when you get sober,
when you remove whatever you'readdicted to, because I believe,
everyone has addictions in ourcase, alcohol.
So when you peel back thoselayers, it's like, you're
obviously like letting go ofweight, but it's almost like
Regressing in a good way back tothat childhood moment where you,
like you said, you publish yourfirst poem at 10 years old, like

(38:31):
10, you weren't drinking thatcreative seed still lives in
you, but sometimes it can be solike, crowded by just the noise
of everything else that's goingon, or really the inner voice
that we tell ourselves, right?
Like, that's the ego that selfhating.
Very critical inner voice, atleast for myself is like, Oh,

(38:53):
but I need this.
I need this.
And it's like, actually youdon't.
And I'm sure you viewed thosepages sober the next day after
drinking, you're like, wait,what did I even, what is this?

It didn't make any sense.
I mean, and I believe in freewriting when you free, right?
There's going to be errors,punctuation and stuff.
But for me, they were like, 20different scenes in one
paragraph.
I'm like, wait, how did I gethere?
Sometimes it made sense.
I will say sometimes it didn'tmake sense.
It didn't make sense, but itjust didn't feel

good.
Yeah, it didn't feel right.
That makes a lot of sense.
It's I read it in the forward orthe acknowledgement.
Of your book, and this isspecific to the root cause you
said, I would first like to givethanks to God who gifted me with
a talent, love and desire towrite what else do you feel like

(39:46):
God has gifted you withespecially in terms of where you
are today, this is under oursober transformation series, so
I'm just curious, like, whatelse do you owe to God?

Life.
I mean, I'm about to getemotional.
I'm not going to do it.
So, for I'm grateful to mygrandmother because she gave me
the foundation of God and I am aChristian.

(40:20):
And for so long, I'm like, I'llbe okay'cause I know God.
And then I got into recovery andit's like, if God, why are you
drinking?
Why are you depending onalcohol?
Like if you're higher power inthis case is God and for me,
Jesus.
Why?
When you're sad you depend onalcohol instead of going to him.

(40:43):
Why?
When you know you're havingdifficulty writing.
Or being in social settings orhave a fear of something.
Why instead of praying, if yousay that's who you, that's your
higher power, why are you makinga higher power alcohol?
And I realized, like, and youget liquor stores that say, it
says like spirits.

(41:04):
And all these and it's like

spirits Wait, i'm, sorry.
I cut you off.
Can you tell them about the

spirit?
I mean the spirits Jekyll andHyde it mentions it in What AA
uses is called the big book ittalks about in the beginning
like, Jekyll and Mr.
Hyde, Mr.
Hyde, Jekyll, whatever.
And that's how I was, like Iwould be really good and next
thing I would just flip thescript.
And it's because that spiritthat was found in these bottles

(41:32):
had taken over.
It's what I identify it as.
And so for me, it was pivotal.
Like I was a little arrogant asgoing through early recovery,
like the first couple of weeks.
I was very, like step one is amid and then, you have to have a
higher power.
I'm like, Oh, I know God.
And then I relapsed two weekslater.
And that's when I realized like,I need to, if I say this is my

(41:55):
higher power, I need to practiceand I need to give everything
over to him.
And so that's what I starteddoing.
I started praying instead ofdrinking.
When, sometimes you get homefrom work and it was a long day
and like, I need a drink.
Now I would start saying, I needto pray.
Like I need to pray.
Like I, I changed my mind.

(42:16):
That mental obsession that Ihad, I just had to change it.
And so when you ask me, what hasGod, I mean, he saved me.
I, it's not fun to say I'm analcoholic.
It's not cute, but it is mystory.
And I do feel like God sometimesputs you through or has certain
things happen for you to be atestimony and to be able to help

(42:38):
other people.
And so I'm just grateful that hehas given me a strong support
system to overcome it.
And he's remained true becauseof him this year.
I mean, released my book, Igraduated from my master's
program.
I, girl, I mean, I was laid offof work and two days later I had

(42:58):
a new job offer.
This year, I mean, I can go onand on about the ways he has
shown up for me this year.
And most importantly, my baddays are not as bad as they used
to be.
Like I used to think it was theend of the world for some
things.
And now I'm like, you know whatthey say, give it to God.
That's, that's who is my higherpower.
I'm going to give it to him.
And I'm just going to keep ongoing because I don't have

(43:20):
control.
The serenity prayer, I don'thave control.
I can just accept it and moveon.
And so that has been soimportant and crucial to my
personal development, myrecovery just everything.
God has given me everything.
That's so beautiful.

Nadine (The Sober But (43:37):
Angelica.
I don't even know where to startbased off of what you said, but
there's so many like deep seedsthat I connect with there.
Humility is a big piece.
It's not cute to walk aroundbeing like, yeah, I'm an
alcoholic.
Like it's not cute.
But to your point, Your vessels,right?
Like we have a greater and it'sto help inspire people.

(43:57):
It's to help, save livessometimes.
Like, that's just me.
So, yes, if I have to, like,take a, like, swallow my ego and
be like, yes, like, I, I'm analcoholic.
I have a problem with alcohol.
Like, I can't drink and thathelps someone else.
And so be it.
I love this idea of, like, the,yeah.
or the, yeah, the connection youthought you had with your higher

(44:21):
power, which is God, youactually had to reframe it
because you realized that if therelationship was solid, the way
you thought it was solid, thenwhy did you feel like you had to
lean on alcohol instead ofleaning on him?
And I think that's so powerful.
That's the one thing I would sayI've learned the most in this
process of sobriety andrecovery, which is, Finding and

(44:45):
healing my relationship with myhigher power because I was so
angry, jaded.
And that was a big part of why Idrank too.
It was just like, well, no onehas my back like that.
Like I, and when I mean, no onehad my back, like, of course I
had friends and family tosupport and lean on.
But what I believe the spiritgoing back to what you had
shared about spirits, right?

(45:06):
Like the spirit lives within, Ibelieve myself and everyone has
a spirit.
It was being altered, right?
Just like my state ofconsciousness was being altered
when I drank, so was my spirit.
And so I, there was this bigvoid I felt like I was walking
around with, and it's because Iwasn't in tune with myself and I
wasn't in tune with my higherpower.

(45:27):
And so that has been my biggest.
Blessing and take away.
So thank you so much for sharingall of that.
And I'm so just like inspired byyour transformation and hearing
parts of your story because alot of it grounds my decision to
get sober.
It has been the greatestdecision.
And when you should.

(45:48):
Like, you've, you've graduatedmultiple times, you have these
accolades, but having thatmoment with other sober women
than your sober home, your soberhouse is like, that's one of
your proudest moments is soincredible.
And the fact that so many peoplethat love you showed up for that
moment is just further, I think,confirmation that you are on the

(46:09):
right path and you were, livingin your purpose and that is just
amazing to hear

and see.
Thank you.
And I'm like you, like, when Igo to these meetings and I meet
other people who have the samestruggles.
The thing is, like, I have madefriends now, people who I
probably never would have beenfriends with before just off of,
like, different demographics,backgrounds, and these people

(46:38):
get me more than people, thathave known me for years.
And so it's really beautifulbeing able to talk to People who
are newly sober or just now inrecovery, as well as people who
have been in recovery forextensive amount of time you're
always reminded of where youwere, versus where you are now.

(46:58):
I think it helps both ways tohelp.
To see and talk to that newperson who's in recovery versus
that person who has been inrecovery for a while.
There's just so many beautifulstories and I, at first I'm
like, I don't want anybody toknow I don't, I'm ashamed, but I
realized that the more I'vetalked about it, the more people
have reached out and asking,from my experience or advice in

(47:21):
a way.
And so I'm just grateful.
Like, if there's just oneperson, that I can help, then
I'm good,

well, I know for a fact, you're
helping more than one person andpeople sometimes need to see
themselves in you, which is whythis is so important.
This visibility and we weretalking earlier.
Behind the scenes about justlike how there's less
visibility, there's less usBlack women, especially in these
spaces, talking openly aboutwhat it's like to suffer from a

(47:50):
disease like alcoholism, right?
And it's like you said, Thisshame that I used to carry
around, I no longer carry itwith me.
But that is where the diseaselay for me.
That's where the sickness was,in shame.
Not wanting to admit that I hada problem because that would
mean that I am the problem.
When in reality, it's not me.

(48:10):
It's this disease.
It's the substance.
And so I just really love thatyou're not afraid to share your
truth and anyone that judges.
I mean, we know this people thatjudge usually they judge because
they are suffering fromsomething similar, or they see
themselves in that.
situation.

The joy that I have, I never thought I could
have this joy.
I never thought I could havethis peace and the happiness
that I have never thought Icould have it.
And so I really don't care.
When you talk about peoplejudging or anything, it doesn't
phase me.

And it shouldn't phase you.
I would just like to wrap byasking what piece of advice
would you give to maybe ayounger Angelica or just someone
who is, let's go back to 2020,right?
You referenced that as beinglike the moment, the defining
moment where you were forced toreckon with yourself.

(49:08):
So what piece of advice do youfeel like could have helped you
the most or could help someoneelse who is maybe.
Suffering, but less willing toact.

The piece of advice I'd give would be what
was instrumental in my recoverywas honesty.
Was looking in the mirror andtaking in account of everything
that I had done.
Why did I do it?
Like getting, to The root causeof my situation getting to, and

(49:45):
it's so funny that has thetitle, but and in the root
cause, let me say this to one ofthe characters is an alcoholic.
It was important to me to have acharacter in it.
As I was writing it throughrecovery to have someone who was
an alcoholic.
So that's in the book as well.
But for me, my advice would beto definitely look in the mirror
and be honest with yourself.

(50:07):
And then also because it is avery, the stigma and the shame
behind it, it would be to.
Find people who have I didn't,identical struggles, similar
struggles as you because likeyou said, like your platform,
you have people deeming yousometimes when I speak about it,
I had people who messaged me andso look at social media.

(50:28):
That's the beauty of socialmedia is you'll be able to find
someone.
If you have questions afteryou've been honest with yourself
about what's going on, If yousee somebody online who remind
you of yourself, reach out tothem, get more information.
What was so important for me wasthe word alcoholic sometimes was
funny.
Girl, you alcoholic, like you'rean alcoholic, like it's fun, but

(50:52):
for me, I didn't truly identifyuntil I knew what that disease
was about.
And so for me, education is key.
Like look and see if you've hadeven a question reach out to
somebody, get that information,be honest with yourself and then
finally be willing to change.
It's uncomfortable.

(51:13):
It's, there's fear behindchanging, but in order to grow,
you have to be uncomfortable.
So I'd say those three things.
I love that so much.

The honesty piece is integral as is
reaching out and finding people.
Cause I honestly, before I gotsober, I didn't know anyone that
was sober.
And now I know.
1, 000, 001 people who are

so I mean, I had gone to meetings, but these
were strangers.
I didn't know anybodypersonally.
And so again, like you said, andso that's why online social
media is really great becauseyou can connect with those
people.

Yes.
And people.
Want to help.
That's the other piece.
I am just so thankful that wehave this conversation, even you
and I, like reconnecting witheach other.
It's like we reconnected viaInstagram, right?
So if we weren't talking aboutthis or like we didn't have the
transparency, then like, I wouldnever know that you were sober,

(52:13):
right?
Like

I would never known you.
So I have to say thank God forJoey Agboula because when he's
part of he's been supersupportive of me.
And when I told him, mystruggles and he mentioned
Nadine and you should follow andI started following and I'm
like, thank you Joey Like thisis you know, especially in early
recoveries when I startedfollowing you I needed to see

(52:36):
your post and your funny memesbecause at the end of the day I
have to laugh at myself some ofThe stuff that I did some of it,
you know I'm like, wow, I reallydid that and I appreciate your
platform because yes, you'revery serious you know, but you
also take a kind of a lightapproach to some of it too.
I mean, we're human And sothere's no, it's not going to
help beating ourselves up everyday.

(52:56):
How can you do that?
Like, it's, so it's nice to seesome of your posts.
Some of it make me laugh.
Thank you.
I think laughter is the bestmedicine.
As you referenced the serenity

prayer earlier, it's like, okay, those
things are out of my control.
That's the past.
Like, I gotta let that go.
And moving forward this is, I'mgoing to do better because I
know better, but also There arefunny moments there, because the
ones I remember, I'm like, girl,come on.

When I go to meetings, sometimes we'll go
around and we're like, Oh, youdid that too.
I'm like, I did that too.
It

wasn't terminally unique or ununique.
It's just this idea that we allthink that like, Oh my God, no
one else has ever done this.
Yeah.
You're in a room full of peoplewho have done that 10 times.
I did that too, right?
Okay, great.
I'm not alone.

I'm not alone.
And that's another thing, foranybody who, may not even
identify as like an alcoholic,but wants to get sober All of
it, you can still learn fromlike AA, you can still learn
from those groups and justeducation because again, they
talk about like how you mightnot be an alcoholic, you might

(54:07):
be a hard drinker, this drink orwhatever.
But again, just finding thatinformation will be so key and
to know that you're not alone.
The

word alcoholic is intimidating and it
almost scared me out of the

rooms.
And to be

real, sometimes I'm like, am I an
alcoholic?
I still grapple with the termalcoholic.
Like, and it's a tricky word toeven like, if you look up, am I
an alcoholic or what it means?
It's like, it's one of the onlydiseases that you self diagnose
yourself pretty much.
It's like really easy.
You'd be like maybe not.

Yeah.
At the same time,

I would rather a million times
walk around telling myself andtelling other people I'm an
alcoholic so that I don't goback to how I was because like
that was my life wasunmanageable, like definition of
unmanageable than delude myselfinto believing I'm not an
alcoholic and I can moderatelydrink or responsibly drink.
When time and time again I'veproven to myself that's

(54:58):
impossible.
So, but yeah, I thank you forbringing that up because you
don't have to like identify perse as being an alcoholic to
access to that support group.
And that those places.

Right, exactly.
Cause I'm like you, like that'sa word that is very strong and
people are like, Ooh, I don'twant to, and I was like that for
a long time.
I'm like, I'm already sufferingfrom depression, anxiety, this,
I don't want to add anotherlabel.
Like I do not want to addanother label, but

now

I'm like, I'll go ahead and put that down.
I'm good.
I feel great now.
I realized that every day isdifferent.
And it's, it's a lifelong kindof lifestyle commitment and
change.
But do whatever works for you.
That, that I'm a big, and that'swhy they say like a higher
power.
They don't like to say, somepeople may not serve God or
Jesus or whatever.

(55:48):
It can be hard and can turnpeople away.
And so for me, I'm like,whatever.
You connect with whatever speaksto you for you not to drink or
for you to just be a betterversion of yourself.
I support,

amen.
Like literally people have veryloose definitions of their
higher power.
That's not the critique.
That's the judgment.
It's like whatever works foryou, like literally you work it.
So just

whatever works for you.
Yeah.
I'm not judge or jury.
I mean, I'm just happy you'rehappy.
You're glowed up.
You're Doing well, your life ismanageable and you could go

for it.
Yeah.

So I can talk to you forever No,

I know Like this is just the

beginning.

When this episode drops it will be
2024.
So the beginning of a new yearwhat are you excited about?
What can we learn from Angelica?
What's new?
Cause you've already written twobooks, which is just incredible.
Is there anything else, anyother projects you have in the
development phase at this time?

So, I say 2021 was recovery year.
I'm getting mine.
Body, spirit doing a lot of selfreflection, self growth,
personal development.
20 I'm sorry, that was 2022.
And then 2023, this year, wasseeing some of the fruits of my
labor come to life.
And then, so for 2024, it's tostill grow from everything that

(57:16):
I've learned.
I finally found a church homehere in Dallas, and so getting
more active in church.
Getting more active in mycommunity sorority it's to
really make Dallas home for me.
My sister just moved here, whichis amazing.
And so thank you.
I'm so happy.
And so I feel like more rootedhere now than I have before.

(57:39):
So really it's just to stayrooted, still writing.
Of course, I'm working on mythird.
I would love to get into filmand television, getting my books
picked up.
So learning more about thatindustry, even though I've
graduated, I'm not in schoolanymore, still wanting to learn.
So, that's what I'm lookingforward to.

(57:59):
People, and I've said this too,this is my season.
This is my season.
I am, I want every year to be myseason.
Like, thank you.
This

is forever

season.
Yeah.
Like my life is a season.
Okay.
So that's what I'm lookingforward to is just to continue
to get better and better,understand myself more and help.
Help others.
That's huge.
Because people have helped meand in

this conversation, you've helped me.
I already have so much to thinkabout it's just so I can't tell
you the best part of sobrietyaside from me, finding a higher
power and connecting withmyself.
It's really connecting withother people who understand what
it's like.
And as you mentioned before,just having.
People from different walks oflife that maybe you never would
have connected to, with theexception that you have this

(58:48):
common, like, it's not even aproblem.
It's a common opportunity toreally pivot and do better and
help others.
So Thank you for everythingyou've

done for your platform, for inviting me on.
I constantly learn more from youand I'm just really grateful.
I've shared your from women ofcolor who went through my
recovery program or in thehouse, I have shared the silver
butterfly with them.
I'm like, you should follow her.
You should follow this platform.
And so I am definitely alwaysgoing to champion you and

(59:23):
support and I'm just gratefulfor you.
I'm so grateful for you

too.
And thank you for sharing.
And I'm going to share all ofyour contacts as well, where
they can find you.
Angelica Roberts, thank you forcoming on.
Everyone check the show notes sothat you can learn more and pick
up Angelica's recent book, TheRoot Cause.
I'm here.
I will also put a link in theshow notes because this is

(59:50):
incredible.
And thank you for representationas well.
I think it's really important toshowcase how alcoholism can
manifest in various forms.
And so it's, I'm really happythat you also have a character
in the book that has.

Angelica Roberts (01:00:05):
Alcoholism as well.
And she's funny too.
Like how we have funny storiesgoes.
Yes.
She funny

Nadine (The Sober Butterfly) (01:00:10):
we so love it.
Thank you so much for coming onand thank you.

Angelica Roberts (01:00:15):
And I'll talk to you soon.
For sure.
Okay guys.
So that's all I have to share.
Thank you for being here, andthank you for allowing me to
hold space in your day as youlisten to this podcast.
If you enjoyed today's episode,please, please do me a favor and
one, make sure you're followingthe show so that you can stay up
to date with everything elsethat's happening.

(01:00:37):
And two.
Please, please leave a review asit helps more people find the
show.
I would appreciate even more ifit's a five star review, but do
what's right for you.
Do what you think I deserve,thank you so much, and I'll see
you next week.
Bye bye.

All Episodes

Episode Transcript

Popular Podcasts

1. Stuff You Should Know

2. Stuff You Missed in History Class

3. Dateline NBC

.css-15opob5{left:0;position:absolute;top:0.8rem;} All Episodes

.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Faithful Narratives: A Sober Author's Perspective on Honesty and Recovery with Angelica Roberts

Episode Transcript

Popular Podcasts

.css-r6mb8g{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:1;overflow:hidden;}1. Stuff You Should Know

2. Stuff You Missed in History Class

3. Dateline NBC

All Episodes

Faithful Narratives: A Sober Author's Perspective on Honesty and Recovery with Angelica Roberts

1. Stuff You Should Know