The Trap of "Learned Helplessness"

Have you ever caught yourself thinking, “What’s the point? I’ve tried before and it never works anyway”?

That quiet thought is more powerful than most people realize. It’s what psychologists call learned helplessness—when repeated disappointments convince your brain that your effort doesn’t matter.

And here’s the thing: it doesn’t just live in the “big” areas. It sneaks into your relationships when you stop asking for what you need. It shows up in your career when you don’t go after opportunities because you assume the answer is no. It’s there when you give up on your health or money goals because “you’ll probably quit eventually.”

In this episode, I want to slow down and really unpack what’s happening in your brain when helplessness sets in—because once you see it for what it is, you don’t have to stay stuck there.

We’ll talk about:

• Why learned helplessness develops (and how your brain thinks it’s keeping you safe).
• The everyday ways it keeps women circling the same patterns.
• How to notice when you’ve quietly stopped trying—not because you can’t, but because you stopped believing it matters.
• What it looks like to unlearn helplessness and rebuild your self-trust in small, powerful ways.

If you’ve been feeling stuck in an “it is what it is” season, this episode is your reminder: helplessness isn’t permanent. It’s learned—and anything learned can be unlearned.

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