219. Jeff Bezos's Butthole Guy

Lords: * Jay * Jenni * https://youtube.com/@kiwami-japan?si=z03WRlRnur883JkN Topics: * The dying art of learning a skill on a message board, such as pixel art or having long hair * The Baldur's Gate 3 butthole chart * https://www.reddit.com/r/BaldursGate3/comments/16dlml1/beholdthechartevermade/ * https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VGhcSupkNs8 * Is giving people ideas helpful? * https://itch.io/jam/picostevemo * James asks "Why is configuring the thing more enjoyable than using the thing?" * I read one time that the way you know if you live urbanly or rurally is if you live in the city you know a place and if you live in the country you have a guy Microtopics: * Three people with social anxiety. * Your left ear not working at the post office. * 80 people in a post office screaming at each other. * Keeping your broken item and just buying another because you don't want to go to the post office. * Naming your band after a way to transmit audio. * I'm good that they're exist. * Getting your New Year's Resolution off of the Mastodon Tooter. * Finding a kid at Applebee's to sit next to. * Forming a seal on your face when there's hair. * A hip burger or hot dog joint hanging a sign saying "Take it to Squirts-Town" over their condiment counter. * An app to track how much emotional load you've dumped on each friend recently. * Preparing to hold space for your feelings. * Going outside and banging on pots and pans at midnight. * Getting really into Casey Kasem's Rockin' New Year. * Getting twelve grapes and trying to eat a grape on every bong of the clock. * How far apart are the bongs? * Whack it for a huge dong! * The second message board you signed up for. (After The Sims.) * Entirely abandoning the idea of drawing with your hands. * The Three Tile Rule. * New Year, New Wife! * Being approached in a Trader Joe's by a guy who runs a message board for men with long hair. * How to find people to follow on Cohost. * Searching for a technical issue on the internet and finding a post on a message board asking your question and the answer is to "google it." * Message boards about tying knots. * A ghost giving you a hug. * Shadebobs and searching on Youtube for shadebobs. * Shadebob Squarepixels. * Turn-based speed runs. * Oxygenarian runs. * Starting with meat. Ending with meat. * Whether it's okay to do a Butthole Chart for people who are still alive. * The Shade of the Butthole. * Special people with hairy buttholes. * When God asks you to bring him 50 buttholes, what body parts he'll accept as the butthole. * Butthole purism. * Personality traits that correspond with butthole traits in popular culture. * What to do if you don't like the shade or the smell of your butthole. * Going on T because you want a hairier butthole. * Whether billionaires are real people. * The Butthole of Dorian Gray. * Hiring a person to take care of your butthole situation. * Making eye contact with the guy who cleans Jeff Bezos's butthole but you can't stop and help, you have to catch your train. * PiCoSteveMo outcomes. * Self-driving taxis paving the entire planet. * Suggesting ideas as a way to make sure nobody will implement those ideas. * Receiving a new CD for Christmas in the post-Napster era. * What we can still use as stocking stuffers now that CDs and DVDs don't make sense any more. * Your life partner going through a Brandon Sanderson phase and giving you a huge Brandon Sanderson book to read. * What you call the plug that goes into a plug. * Getting paid to learn to solder. * Deliberately introducing mpeg artifacts into a video stream. * How to troubleshoot a motherboard now that they don't beep any more. * How many Intels they're up to now. * A memory of fun that you can't go back to. * Awful Fantasy. * Putting a foul-mouthed rom hack on your SNES Classic and then forgetting that happened when you give it away to your friends' kids. * Imagining how great a product is going to be while you're buying the product. * Asking for a toy for Christmas even though you know you'll never make time for it. * Going to a friend's house and seeing a bajillion guitar pedals that you can't afford. * Giving your guitar pedals away to someone who'll actually use them rather than just reselling them. * Hanging out with the kind of person who's playing Rock Band in 2023. * The only generation that learned how to use computers. * Worrying that the five year old computer geniuses are going to hack your foot so you can't walk. * Living in New Holstein Wisconsin and needing psychic healing. * Living in the city and having a place you go to for hot dogs vs. living in the country and having a guy you call for hot dogs and he comes to your house with a suitcase full of hot dogs and a USB-C grill. * Moving to the country so you can hang out of the hot dog guy. * A place that's not even really a place because you can't catch Pokemon there. * Two Guys and a Place. * Bringing independent gas stations their coffee. * Yacht Man Cologne. * Stuff You're Not A