We Are Family: Dysfunctional vs. Functional Supporting Cast E69

Join us for "We Are Family" as we explore family dynamics and uncover strategies to build a healthier, more supportive family environment. In our ongoing series, "My Life Play," this episode analyzes dysfunctional and functional relationships in TV sitcom families, providing valuable insights to transform your family dynamics.

Episode Transcript

(00:03):
I am Phyllis Wyatt-Whitley. This is Spiritology Live.
Together, we will break the religious shackles. We will elevate your journey
for a higher consciousness, transformation, for self-discovery.
We will breathe life into my Amazon best-selling book called Spiritology. That's right.
Each episode, we will dive in spiritually, metaphysically, and holistically

(00:27):
to your well-being. offering you the tools to master and manifest your promised land within. Let's go.
Hey, everybody, I just got back from Texas. Everything is bigger and better
in Texas. The houses are castles.
Kudos to those who have made this journey a divine journey.

(00:49):
Kudos to the bookstore in Texas. Go to them because they will give you a platform.
Kudos to Shida, one of my mentees, and also I would say my assistant.
It was a great long trip, but guess what?
We are back. I am back, excuse me.

(01:11):
And I am going to be talking about the life play. I don't know if I'm connected, but sort of connected.
If you didn't listen to my life play, you got to go back about the actor,
the director, at the end of the day, you realize you can't blame nobody but yourself.
Yes, I know you don't like that, but let's go forward. Now we are going to go into We Are Family.

(01:38):
Y'all remember that song? Oh my goodness. I'm really not going to start this
because some of y'all will start, you know, I don't want your dog hollering
in the background, world. But listen, what about your family?
What about if you have a family life play?
We are going to discuss the dysfunctional and the functional.
And the reason why we're going to do it is because I'm going to show you that you're not alone.

(02:04):
Lots of people come from dysfunctional family. But how do you make it?
How do you raise your children to not be dysfunctional?
Whether whether you're married or you're single or you've been thinking about it.
Some people usually say, I have met, unfortunately, some people who had usually said,
I don't want no kids because their life play was terrible.

(02:30):
Guess what? Let's start this party up right now.
Because what you're going to learn here is I am going to show you something
about your family being the whole play.
Your stage, your life stage is all about your family.
Only because you probably let it be. because, yes, you can come from a dysfunctional

(02:52):
family, but you can grow up and say, okay, I had enough of y'all.
And then you visit that play once in a blue moon, okay?
I'm not saying shut the door, but handle them with a long silver spoon.
So what covers the functional? It can be so many, many things.
First of all, you have to understand this life play is vision, executor.

(03:18):
It is about the vision. all over. And when you're dealing with the family in the whole play,
you got a lot of cooks in the kitchen and you got a lot of crooks in the backyard,
or should I say basement?
I know y'all know what I'm talking about. Now I got your attention.
Okay. I'm going to go not too deep, but I'm going to tell you right now,

(03:42):
when you're dealing with the functional family, to give you an illustration
or a description, it can be poor communication.
You know, she said this, the sisters aren't speaking because something they said when they was 20.
You understand what I'm saying? You're not speaking to your uncle because it
could have been some physical abuse.

(04:04):
It could be frequent conflict. Every time you get around your family,
you know the family where every holiday you get around them is like,
you know, she cooked that rice, it didn't taste good.
The collard greens, oh my God, did you taste? She can't cook better than me. I'm sick of her.
And you can't even take sides. You know what I'm saying?

(04:25):
Whose side can you take? And those conflicts can be minor or can be,
I knew I was going to go through this.
I knew I was going to, I'm just, let me just do what I need to do,
smile. And I'm getting the, you know what, out of here. I'm not coming back for Christmas.
I laugh, but it's serious because it has everything to do with you as a grown person.

(04:46):
And I'm going to go ahead and use TV sitcoms family to describe your family.
This is going to help you, okay? Because it's going to help you realize that
you're not alone. You're not alone. You're not alone. You're not,
I'm not my family anymore, okay? You can go over to that play and you can be
a guest, but then leave it and come over because you're in control of your play.

(05:12):
Let's start it off with, I'm going to start it off, the Cosby Show.
The Cosby Show. Remember, we are not here to judge Bill Cosby,
but we're here to go and look at these so-called reality shows.
They didn't call them that before. But let's look at the Cosby show.
Remember that? I will describe it as the Huskaboo, Huskaboo,

(05:37):
Huskaboo family was very somewhat unrealistic expectations,
according to most black or brown family or children who watched it because it
was like, oh, my God, the family.
I believe the father was a doctor and the mother was a lawyer.

(05:57):
Please don't quote me on that.
But you was like, oh, wow.
You watched because you just wanted to have that family, especially for those
of us who don't know where our father's at or our father was absent or was divorced.
You fell in love with that family.
The father, everything he said has something to do with humor.

(06:19):
The mother was straightforward, clear, but she literally brought humor in it.
But it was all about love.
Do you see how I describe that?
Some of you had families like that. Some of you didn't. OK, I'm going to get to the next one.
But this particular family, we say it was unrealistic because a lot of us didn't

(06:42):
come from that side of life.
To this date, I have heard that the Satan in Harlem, in the Brownstone,
I have seen people say, hey, listen, I got to get a Brownstone like that because
it brought good memories. You understand what I'm saying?
So can you make your family this way? I think yes. I think the good part of it is the humor.

(07:06):
Have fun. Laugh. You understand what I'm saying?
You can laugh about it, things. You can do it in love, correction and love. Yes.
And you have to have an open communication and you have to have respect.
That means that you, from a very, from the time your baby is in your belly,

(07:27):
you got to teach them what respect is.
Okay. And if you have that, you can have that. And people will look at you.
Oh, you know, they, this, and you trying to be, it was a time they used to say,
you're trying to be the hustable. I might be saying it wrong,
but they used to say that. Who you think you are?
You can be the doctor.

(07:49):
Your wife can be the lawyer and vice versa.
So it's up to you. So I'm here to tell you, you can be anything that you want.
Where once people were saying, and this was years ago, this came out,
there's no sustain as two Black people having a mighty job like this.
I don't care if you married outside
your race, you know, you have a black woman, white man or vice versa.

(08:14):
You can make your family the way you want to.
If you can have your eyes on it and you can take out the unrealistic pause and
you can say, you know what?
We are going to be a family where we strive for the best, the best careers, especially today.
You can do it. You have to put this in, I said before, in your mind and then believe it.

(08:38):
And when you believe it, you're going to live it.
And once you believe it, they won't call you the Huxtable, but they will call you probably,
a good family to set an example. Now let's go on to the next one.
Some of you say, nah, that wasn't me. That wasn't me.
But guess what? How about the Brady Bunch? Let's go over to that play.

(09:00):
Remember the Brady Bunch? Oh God, what is that?
I cannot remember, but listen to me. See, they was a blended family.
And a lot of y'all say, how can I be, you know, I don't, a Brady Bunch. Wasn't they perfect?
And if you're a Black person, yes, you probably looked at it as these people

(09:26):
up here, they Caucasian, they are not like my family. but I used to love it.
I used to watch it and love it because they literally were sort of dysfunctional.
They had a lot of challenges, but a lot of those were because you got two families
coming together and children's was pushed away.
Like if you're the oldest, you was no longer the oldest. The different families was moved around.

(09:50):
So the baby wasn't a baby and you know, whatever.
I commend the parents, the parents, all the stuff that they went through,
including the maid. I I think her name was Alice.
Yeah, they used to play tricks on her and all of this and this and that. And they had the dog.
And it was so much that happened in school and whatever.
And then you watched them grow up. And they loved each other.

(10:11):
At the end of the day, they loved each other.
So if you have a blended family, don't be mad at it.
You know, I also heard people, and I'm going to take this to the dating site,
where they said, oh, I have a child. I have two kids.
Nobody's not going to want me. You'll be surprised who want a blended family.
I'll give you a couple of examples that have stuck with me.

(10:32):
One guy, and I've seen this on House Hunters, and he said that the woman had,
I kid you not, about eight kids, maybe more.
And I can't remember, but I tell you, he said when he seen that,
because she could have lied. She was a nice-looking woman.
She had a good job.

(10:53):
And this man said when he seen her profile, he said, I bet it's a lot of fun over there.
And you know why he was thinking that? Because he literally was lonely.
He didn't have a family. So females, stop it.
Stop thinking that you got too much. You have just enough for somebody who grew
up isolated or abandoned or went through foster care to foster care.

(11:18):
You will be surprised how many people is like dying to get into a big family that they never had.
Also, I remember it was a lady in the church years ago and she really was like
her mind was like totally off because she had about six kids, I recall. her.
And she was like, I'm not into all of this stuff because you know,

(11:41):
back then, even now when a man come to a, and I'm talking about a real man and
a king come to a church and it's his first time or whatever he first joined,
you know how the women's go crazy.
That's my husband. That's my husband. And so it's a fight.
And the story I was told was by a relative of hers who said,
Hey, she didn't feel good, but she, she noticed this man was handsome and everything,

(12:03):
but she She didn't even want to fight for him.
She didn't want to say anything to him because she knew she had six kids.
And she said, he ain't even going to look at me. God ain't even going to bless me with this man.
Well, days have gone and people I have heard still claiming every man that walks in.
And you're not only claiming them, you are, some of you are doing worse than that.

(12:25):
You're doing some whatever bad, how should I say, gospel, should I say ghostful?
And you're doing everything. And I just don't understand it.
I mean, why would you want somebody who don't want you?
So y'all hocus pocus and whatever, we're going to get to their family in a minute.
But you know what happened? The guy met the girl for the first story I was telling you about.

(12:50):
And he fell in love with the family. They was literally all house hunters and
they went and bought a house together.
That man looked like he was cheesing all around. And he, yes, he had a good job.
Most of y'all probably saying, what kind of job he had? And then a woman back
in the days, that man who came to the church had his eyes on her and he wound

(13:12):
up going, dating her, trying to date her.
And I recall a family member said that she told him, she even told him,
I have to pull away because I don't have anything to offer you.
I have these, my kids are bad.
She told him because I believe she had, they was small.
And you know, when they small, they act a fool. and this man pursued her and
pursued her and wanted to marry her. Okay, that's enough of that.

(13:37):
So don't ever, this is helping somebody.
Don't ever feel like, you know, I already have a family.
And then if he have a family and you have to deal with the, you know,
you say, I don't want to deal with the other woman, the baby mama and all of that.
If you love somebody, you would deal with that baggage. So let's move on.

(13:57):
So I hope you got something out of there. Yeah, you need to put your confidence
up for that one, for the Brady Bunch.
Let's go over to the, I would say, movie set or play of the one. Oh, my goodness.
It is the monsters. Y'all remember that?
I know y'all said, there go my family. There go my family. They had a problem.

(14:19):
They was rejected by society.
How many of y'all got those families?
I know. Do you understand? You know what?
I'm not even going to laugh because you know that those families right there,
the monster family, you got the, you know how it is. You got the fathers that
alcoholic, the mothers walking around dressing like she's in her team.

(14:40):
You may got the aunt that's a cougar. You one of those families?
I know y'all said Miss P got me down, down pat.
You know those families. The one that you ashamed to bring your man to.
You know you ashamed to bring your woman to. The fucks you know.
The monsters, I used to love that picture. But you notice with them,

(15:02):
they was always trying to fit in the norm.
Like I recall Herman Monster went back to school or something and he went in
there and he's this big, giant figure.
And the kids looking up and like, what are you doing here?
And then they had, I don't know, was it the niece or something who,
you know, would consider normal.

(15:22):
She didn't have all the character stuff that they had. And so if she met somebody
and then she would take them home because she felt like they was normal.
What happens in that is when your family is so dysfunctional,
you swear they normal until you meet a family or neighbors, until you meet people
in your school who literally have a, what you would call, hostable family.

(15:45):
And then you spend the rest of your life, oh, why me, why me, why me, why me? me.
Yes, I know I had the monster family. Okay.
So if my family listens to this, they're going to say, oh, she a liar.
She was the monster. Whatever, whatever, whatever.
But what was happening is they literally didn't like their parents.

(16:07):
And this is what people go through.
Say, if you're coming from a poor family and you have to wear the same pants as your brother.
So as you get taller, or your pants become high waters or you have family is
so dysfunctional, you're going to literally just overeat and you got the daughters
who might become beyond.
They closet eaters and they eat and eat and people call them the fat, even the son.

(16:31):
So those particular fat, that particular family is kind of hard because what
do you do when you need help?
When probably the Your parents, both of them need counseling.
What can you do? Have a relationship with God and pray like you have never prayed before.
Because I do say that.

(16:53):
With all honesty, you have to tap into the spiritual rim.
And that, you will be surprised, will start moving on your family behalf.
And if it don't, and they reject it spiritually, you need to go forth and you
need to do everything that you can.
As if I'm talking to a young woman, a young man, you have to do everything in

(17:17):
your powers to build your spirit and your mind.
So that when it's time for you to leave, you will be flying out that door.
Like people was flying out the door when they went to their house.
They was, you know, see them flying, they were running.
And you have to say, I'm not going to be that. I told somebody not too long

(17:38):
ago, you say, why was our place with just a functional family?
And I said, did you ever think that back in the day when you,
before conception, when you chose your family? And if you look at Napoleon Hill,
he has something about the envelope that you receive when you're born.
If you believe that, would you go choose the easy family or do you want to be?

(18:04):
Do you want to be that one that God say good daughter, good son?
When you go ahead and choose the wrong family, that's the function of what you change them.
Hmm. Or you become something brilliant from that. that some of the best people
to this date, famous or non-famous, who have accomplished so much is because

(18:28):
they came from a dysfunctional family.
So I hope that helped you because it is a possibility.
You was created to show your family, your parents, how to be a parent.
So don't let that be an excuse.
And I know some of you say, oh my God, why? Because a lot of y'all found yourself

(18:48):
or of finding yourself being the mother of your mother and even your father.
And you may have much more money and are blessed with prosperity where you can help them.
Don't be upset because they did the best that they knew how at that time.
And you need to go back. I always say you don't know who you are until you go

(19:11):
in your past and find out what was going on in that family.
If it it was a lot of abuse, a lot of criticism, then you understand why I carry
for each generation. And what can you do?
Stop the generational curse. Yes, you can.
Well, let's come out of there. My favorite show was The Adam Family. Yes, it was. Oh, my God.

(19:37):
The Adam Family was a trip. I loved them. To this day, I believe Wendy got her own show on Netflix.
And I only watched a couple episodes. It was great. Because they had some kind of power.
Now, some people would claim them to be doing witchcraft and all of that.
They would say they're the dog family. And they might feel that way.

(19:59):
Somebody in your family might be a psychic.
Somebody might call themselves a spiritual pastor and they're doing all kinds
of stuff under the table.
And you say, oh my God, this is definitely the adult family.
You know, one of those where your aunt go got them and everything is all black.

(20:19):
The house is dark. And I mean, you know, mama psychic, you don't tell nobody
that got the bomb in the house.
So I laugh at that. But some of those, the people with Adam Fallon, they exist.
They exist. Yes, they do. Listen, I don't want to go and talk about this,

(20:41):
but you got the witch's family up in New England and you got the down in South
Carolina and Brookford.
You got the people who swim by, little doctors.
So they feel that, listen, my family is normal.
But if you mess with me, you know what I'm going to do. Because they feel I
got the power. We all got the power.

(21:03):
But they use theirs in a different way. Instead of giving the gospel,
they do the opposite of the gospel.
It's spreading the good news. They spread the bad news.
So, yes, a lot of Adam families out there. And some of them were stout.
I remember back in the days after Janet Jackson did Rhythm Nation.
I mean, you couldn't tell me I was Gotham. I mean, I had the black. I had my hair dyed black.

(21:28):
I wear the black whatever. And then coming from New York, it was like the black
shirt, the black skirt or the black pants, the black duster.
Oh, honey child, you couldn't tell me nothing. And then I'll change up with
the boots and some other color.
So you can tell me that I wasn't a part of the Adam family. I used to love that show.
And we do have a cousin that you know that that you know, that cousin you don't

(21:52):
want nobody to know about. Well, with that being said, that was the functional trait.
The good part about them is they had a deep emotional bond.
They was very loyal to each other. Yes, they believe it or not.
They valued their family. They loved their family. And one thing about them,
they used to always look at you.

(22:13):
If you couldn't accept them, they would say, I wonder what's wrong with them.
And I can go back to the monsters. Remember where they'd be running out the
house? Like if I believe it was the nieces, someone would bring a man over and they would run.
They would look at each other and say, well, what's wrong with them?
Because this is something that you can learn from the adult family and the monsters.
You're not going to fit in everybody family. You not.

(22:38):
All of us are unique.
And we are trying. We try our best to fit in.
So you need to learn something from that. Don't try to fit in.
What you can do is you can take that power that you do have,
that God have given you, mink up with the highest power.
And I guarantee you, you need to go ahead and you need the vision board,

(23:02):
meditation, prayer your way out of some of those families that brought harm
to you physically and emotionally.
And you can turn around and have your family and say, this is my family and
I'm going to bring them up the way they need to be.
Curse generational free. Okay, you learned something from that.

(23:24):
Wait a minute. Wait a minute. I am not finished.
How about married with children? You think I listen?
Married with children. Let me tell you about that.
That actually was one of my favorite shows, the Bundys.
But the defunct part is he was so pissed. He had so much sarcasm.

(23:49):
His demeaning communication was terrible.
And it kind of like merriled real life where people are in the family when you're
always criticized, when your mother say you too fat, when your mother say you too dumb.
How could you be a lawyer and you stupid? I don't care what your teacher said.

(24:09):
Seriously, parents have done this. Cousins, aunts, family members laugh at you
when you're trying to make it.
I know because I think one of my holistic doctor was telling me,
oh, my family, every time I visit them, you know, they still in the ghetto and
they look at me and say, oh, are you real?

(24:31):
Are you really a doctor? You know, if people conscious level is in a gutter,
or should I say your family, if your family never flew in the plane,
if your family stayed in the state that they live in and they only drove to
the nearest city, if your family never graduated from high school,

(24:53):
much less nobody never finished a degree.
Let me tell you, if your family is literally sitting there and they are going
from the government taking care of them to the government taking care of them
and their kids, what are we talking about?
We are family.

(25:13):
I'm going to say it again. We are family. Yes, we are talking about this just to remind you.
You can change the narrative. narrative now the bundies was somewhat of if you
got the criticism and you got emotional damage this is where i come in i help
you change your world by changing your whisper those inner seeds those inner

(25:37):
speech that people cast upon you okay what happens is.
I thought it was a very funny show, but when you dig deep down inside,
that was the dysfunctional part of it.
Now, was there any good thing about it?
The good part about it is when they had situations or issues,

(25:58):
they usually showed up together to correct it.
But if you're suffering from that right then and there, my prayers are with you.
You can also try to contact me on selfwhisperer.com and I can help you get through
some of this, the functional stuff. Can we go on?

(26:19):
Let's talk about the Jeffersons. One of my favorites because he was moving on up.
He was, listen, George Jefferson was so great.
And I believe the wife's name was Wheezy and the maid, oh my God,
the neighbors. I loved it because I'm from New York and they was moving on the east side.

(26:41):
And it was a beautiful, beautiful picture. And when you got a family moving
on up, that can be you. Keep on moving.
But we're going to go ahead and talk about that particular family.
That family was dynamic to me because they had a goal and they had a family
business, the cleaning business.
And that goal was accomplished. accomplish.

(27:03):
Unfortunately, it was a lot of racial tension because of what happened back
in the days in that era that George Jefferson and his family had seen.
If you watched All in the Family, which was another good show,
you can see some of the racial tension.
So this is why, just to give you an update on it, this is why that particular

(27:26):
family, or should I say George George had an ego.
This is why he didn't trust anybody who was not black or brown. Okay.
And you know, I believe the neighbors or something were upstairs was a interracial
marriage and he frowned upon that.
And the rest was history because everything was done in humor.

(27:50):
Very, very funny. They did actually had to conquer obstacles,
but it was refreshing and compared to good times because good times are.
Was not one of my favorite. Although I give them kudos for having a Black family
on TV, and that was done, I believe, in South Chicago.

(28:14):
So it brought attention to the Black family. It was great.
I have nothing against that. But as time went by,
it didn't do anything to the average Black person, to our consciousness,
because it was one of those pictures or TV shows that you had to agree upon or you had to say, no,

(28:35):
no, I'm not going to say, oh, wow, this is just like us.
Oh, okay. So the end to all end is in their family. So that means that it's
always going to be in our family.
This is why I like the Jeffersons. You want to call your life play moving on up.
You want that to be your goal, moving on, moving to the next step, in the next step.

(28:57):
Some of you said, well, Ms. P, when do I stop moving on up?
If you stop, I think Jesus is knocking at your door. Okay.
Always not compete, but always learn something new.
I believe that's moving on up. Why, why, why?
We actually want to master our behavior, our life place, excuse me.

(29:26):
You want to master it. You want to be in control of it.
The downfall of the Good Times reality show was it was a reality show,
excuse me, it was not a reality show, but at that time it was a sitcom that
was like a reality show of bad news.
This is why you have to what?
Master what's going into your ear gate. Even your whole family,

(29:50):
because now we are talking about what we are family.
Remember, you are in control of your family. You are the producer.
You are the director. You are the writer. Those of you who didn't listen to
my last podcast, it was all about your life play and how the real secret is
that you are all those things, including the actor or actress.

(30:13):
Hello. Remember that. Why? Because now I'm going to extend that to we are family
because some of us are blessed to have a family who stopped.
Somebody stopped the generational curses.
And they literally say, hey, no, we're going to be a great family.

(30:34):
That's why that song was so popular back then. Now, let's learn from good times,
but let's really focus on the Jeffersons, some of the traits,
the characters, characteristics.
And what we are going to talk about right now is the power of the black plays

(30:54):
that's out there on Broadway, off Broadway.
Okay. But I'm looking at it from a spiritual point of view. Remember,
let's go back and memory lane.
Remember the Hollywood movies in the seventies?
Coffee, Foxy Brown.
Yeah. By who was the actress? Pam Grill. I thought she was the most beautiful

(31:17):
black woman that ever lived.
But But that was something that as a child, I looked up to that figure.
You wanted to see, wow, we have that much power.
And we know what happened with that, with Hollywood. It was too much power,
too many people going and looking up to the black people, their own kind.

(31:39):
And they at that time, it was like a boycott or they banded.
And I remember it took a while, but they knocked all of them out of Hollywood.
And once they did that, they started bringing in people who look like them because
you know how I feel about Hollywood.
If you read my book, Spiritology is a religious shackles that hangs in high

(32:00):
places in lowly places. You'd be surprised.
But in this case, Hollywood turned around and started bringing in non-blacks.
And they put a black person to play against another Caucasian actress or actor.

(32:20):
To bring the people, to bring the blacks. See, black people do not know how much power they have.
No, they don't. So what they do is they literally, at that time,
we, I would say, because I was very young, I don't recall, I do recall there
was a gap in between watching the movies.

(32:40):
And I remember thinking in my mind, I remember that back then at that age,
I was like, I never, never go to another movie again.
And I remember the conversation around me was, now you don't want to go see
no, you know, no white picture.
Now, this is not a statement of being racist. I'm just telling you like it is
the real thoughts that was going through everybody's mind.

(33:01):
So what happened is you started going because they was pulling in by bringing
in one black actress or actor and preparing them up with someone else.
And the whole thing changed the few
generations out here don't even know the last
few generations don't even know those
pictures I'll name for name a few

(33:22):
it was of course we had Pam Grill we had Black Belt Jones the karate pitcher
I don't even know what happened to him we actually had remember car wash oh
my god y'all do remember the song car wash nothing you know but I better to
stop that. I don't even know what it is.
Oh God, what was it? Well, anyway, how about Lady Sings the Blues?

(33:45):
Oh God. Diana Ross.
How could you have somebody that act that good? And I don't know why she didn't
continue it. And I think she did something years later in Dynasty.
But why? Then we had Superfly. Remember Cooley High?
I can't quite remember that, but I think that was in high school or something.
Then Shaft with Richard Roundtree. Jim Brown was playing the movies.

(34:08):
And I also have a little bit of this in my book, which I'll speak about later called Blackology.
I touched on a little bit of how we was stereotyped the wrong way.
From those films. Whereas somebody else that is not black or brown play those
characters, they are considered almost tough.

(34:31):
With that being said, I encourage you to have family movie time and go back
and look at those pictures.
Now, some of those pictures, you don't want to let your kids watch.
I think you understand what I'm saying, especially one with Pam Grier,
Jim Brown, because Because it's a little, you know, violent with the talking and whatever.

(34:52):
It's great because they always say you have to know who you,
you won't know who you are until you go back and see your past. And you need to see that.
And you wonder why, well, all the power, all the money, especially what athletes
have and entertainers have now, rappers, that they don't go back and recreate those stuff.
And I do thank God for Netflix is putting on a lot of black shows.

(35:14):
So let's go back to the Jeffersons. Now that you know, earlier we was discussing
the different, different families.
Now you know why I like the Jeffersons.
Remember, good time was good for a season.
But I remember even afterward, things started getting better because most of
their episodes was be all to end all. And people got tired of that.

(35:36):
OK, so listen, what you want to do from this, what are you going to learn from this? What's my point?
You say, I know how it is to have a show called Good Time.
But regardless of my struggles, I was in my mother's play. Unfortunately,
we was in our parents' play.
My mother and my stepfather struggled with alcoholism.

(35:59):
Literally, they was, I mean, it was fights. It was fussing. It was cursing.
And it was humor. And it was laughter all at the same time.
So I don't even know what I want to say. I say it was sort of good times and
moving on up because we did.
We went from South Bronx to the, you know, upper Bronx.
And if you know, if you're from the Bronx, you know what I mean.

(36:19):
But what happened? My mother was a nurse's aide.
My mother been through her life where she cleaned houses, cleaned it the best.
And then she went into nurse's aide.
She did a lot of home nurse's aide where she would home health aide where she
was actually on the weekend.
She would go upstate or to the rich people and she
would nurse someone family member that

(36:42):
was sick so even though her big her drunk y'all
remember that we used to call it the DDTs you go it's
like in between the stage in between drunkness and soberness
when you throwing up everything and oh I guess
she was weeping what she sold and you weak and
you tired and then you embarrassed and then we had to come and
tell her what she did and I didn't do that so that probably

(37:04):
was the human's part because I was so glad to see her back
to normal she it
was many occasions if we was running a low on food
or things needed to be done that we needed something for school I've seen my
mother get up sober throwing up whatever and she went to work came back with
her money so that's why it was a combination of the of those two sip cars and

(37:30):
I had a stepfather who, regardless of how drunk he was.
You know, he got up and went to work every day. And then he had his beer.
He stopped at the store and had his beer and brought it back home.
So yeah, that's just a little bit about me because despite the drama, I didn't have lack.
I didn't even know what lack was, even though, you know, until I went into somebody

(37:52):
else's territory in that area, when we We moved up Upper Bronx and I started
seeing black people with homes.
I said, oh, my God. And I went to my friend's home and I was like, goodness.
But you have to see it. That's why a lot of people criticize Obama.
I'm not here to pick, you know, throw politics in it.
But one thing they didn't realize is that Obama opened the door for black people

(38:16):
in in all aspects of life to go higher in the ceiling.
You know, even though the next one came in, and we won't even mention his name,
to wipe away that legacy, because America do not want history of the Blacks.

(38:37):
Because they don't want black people to know who they are. Now,
you probably say, I don't like what you're going. I am so, so sorry.
Que sera, sera. You can keep going. But those of you here need to know,
you need to know your past,
not for you to go and start a riot, but for you to go ahead and form and structure your life play.

(39:00):
Okay. So in your life play, you want to literally improve your situation.
How do you do that? Okay. You want to go ahead and set goals.
You want to create a positive atmosphere for your home.
It is your castle, whether you're a single woman or man or married,
you literally want to make that house your castle.

(39:24):
I don't care if you're in a ghetto. I have been in the ghetto.
I used to live in the ghetto when I was very young, but I already know this.
Some of the best house kept houses in the ghetto.
Some people die to fix up their house. You understand what I'm trying to say?
So, and you'd be surprised when I got older and started looking at houses and stuff like that.
I was shocked when they were showing the people that were still in there,

(39:46):
their house, and they would be up for sale.
And I couldn't believe it. I couldn't believe what it looked like. I was like, really?
So that's just something you want to take. But then you might say,
well, I think they was right in the house. So that is true. It's a different conscious level.
Speaking of conscious level, we should always try to avoid negative influence,
negative news, news at nighttime, all of that stuff.

(40:10):
I am not telling you you can't live, but you can learn how to control what's
really there because true, your kids are going to go to school and a lot of
stuff is going to be in their head.
They're not going to be being drama always, all the time in school because they
should be, you know, a friend of a teacher, I would hope.

(40:30):
So you want them to come home just like your husband, you know,
he's out there and the world is against him, especially if he's a black man.
And then if he's any any other culture, man, the world might be against him,
but then he have to come home and he should not come home to more drama.
So you set the tone. If you a man who who actually stay home,
take care of your kids, stay at home, dad, you do the same thing.

(40:55):
OK, you know what they say. You should know them by their fruit.
Yes. Why is this so important, Miss P? You say I don't get this podcast. Why is this important?
It is important because I'm teaching you how to have the cold of manifestation.
Everything that you see out here is a, is how would I say, is a copy,

(41:21):
a reflection of what's going on inside of you.
So what's happening with that, you might say, I don't believe it.
Let's go ahead and look at a scripture.
One of the scriptures is Proverbs 31, 28. eight, her children raise up and call

(41:41):
her blessed and her husband also. And he praises her. Why?
This is in Proverbs, the virtuous woman. Why?
Because woman, you have that much control and power in your household.
You are the nurturer. You are the multitasker. You are the one who really is running that life play.

(42:02):
Now, you know, your husband is there, but you are running that life play.
Even if you are bringing home all the income, a woman was just,
God just made us to do so much at one time.
We have an entrepreneur spirit.
Now I'm not saying the men don't, but usually you see the woman is really behind

(42:25):
closed doors, doing a lot of stuff that you have no business doing.
And that's why I'm talking to you. And then if you'll stay at home,
dad, then you got the power.
Now let's look at manifestation. Let's look at what happens when you weep the wrong thoughts, okay?
Because the other, I'm going to read this. I had a friend, or I still have a
friend, as of today, they are still living, but they're living from nursing

(42:49):
home to the hospital back and forth.
I remember the way that person lived their life. And a lot of,
this could be a woman or man, and they lived their life.
I'll never forget, I said this before, they read the obituary every day.
We used to joke about it. But I used to say to them, excuse me,
but where do you get out of that?
And they was like, I love it. I love to go in there and read it and nobody's going to stop me.

(43:12):
And I remember jokingly saying, you know what? You're going to get up one day
and you're going to read the obituary.
What are you going to do when you realize that your name is up there?
And, you know, we laughed about it. And they was like, well, then I know something.
I don't know. But we laughed. But I didn't even really know what way God was taking me.
But looking back, that really wasn't funny because they also lived a life,

(43:34):
a ratchet life of going from females to females and making them pay for what
their ex-wife did to them.
And they the way it was supposed to be. I don't know, because both of them were
not here to defend themselves.
But it appeared that she was raising all these kids and then they.

(43:56):
She got tired because he was he just was living a ranch at life and she went
and did her own thing and then she was living a ranch at life.
It's almost like payback.
So I watched that person, even though like I was living, we were living in different states.
I watched that person because they was one of my good friends.
And unfortunately, I brought it to the attention many times of how they was

(44:20):
treating the ladies out there.
And men listen up and even the females, y'all do the same thing.
And it's almost like, okay, I lost a good thing and she walked away. He lost that.
He even lost respect from the kids and the family.
He lost the whole family, but he got them back because she went on and did what

(44:41):
she needed to do. What's the point I'm getting at?
He reaped that harvest. Here go the scripture, Proverbs 23, 7,
as a man think is in his heart, so is he.
When you've been messed up from the floor up by other people.
And you say, I'm going on a mission to go forth and you create your life play as a reality show.

(45:03):
I'm going to pay them back. You're going to meet that because it's going to
be a reflection on your outside of your life and your outer world. Okay.
So just for instance, you would know them for their fruit. Okay.
Because people will come to you and they will try to convince you or impress

(45:26):
you by being something that I'm going to talk about soon about keeping up with the Joneses.
But before we even get there, you need to make sure that your house is not a reality show.
Stop lingering on conversations that's negative.
Your children had a bad day, your husband had a bad day at the office,

(45:48):
you had a bad day with the neighbors, and everybody come to the dinner table
and bring it all together.
Okay, you can speak about it. I mean, I'm not going to control your conversation,
but leave it there and try to have a meal.
If you're going to have a meal together, don't bring that because all of that
vibration is getting even in your food. You know, some people say, I only want to eat.

(46:11):
Stop it. you can control that just
like you control in your life play you control the support
and cast that's coming in and right now
we're talking about what we are family you have to control it because your family
will bring gossip okay during that time you want to be very very very careful

(46:33):
because your family can do what a lot of entertainers family have done come in into to their life.
And when they weep the harvest, all they want to do is say, I weep the harvest.
They have to have earned it. You can bring in your family and you can put them
in positions according to their uniqueness and intelligence and give them a

(46:56):
job. And that's like in your life, like give them a role.
But those people, those entertainers, or even in Hollywood or even music,
a lot of them fell. And when they fell, the family was scattered.
I have known people who said they paid, the family came to them and said,
we want to get married. And they paid for the whole wedding.
And after the wedding and everything, their family didn't even speak to them anymore.

(47:21):
I know some stories out there that that's why I'm here today that will blow
your mind. Because you're probably saying, I know how that felt.
I was duped by my family. So you have to be careful. You can create the play.
And sometimes you really think that somebody is there for you and they're not.
That can be your friends, your so-called good friends.

(47:43):
Your enemies might be your best friend because I had said before,
just because they're on the set, some people just come to your set just,
you know, their aunt or uncle, just to see if their set is going to blow up.
I mean, I know because I got people in my family who will not come around unless
somebody's getting ready to to die or somebody in the hospital.

(48:06):
And then after that, they gone. Don't have nothing to do with you.
And people look at you like, you know, you wrong.
You locked that person off your plate. No, no. Sometime you, you know what you do?
Handed them with a long silver spoon. And I wouldn't, just don't give them the key.
They shouldn't be able to come in and out, in and out. Now this should be, this should help you.
But let me explain something to you.

(48:27):
You know, that person, you know how you, You know, when you go to a person's
house and I don't know if you did this when I was young, I should always do this.
I would go to the bathroom and I would look in people's bathroom cabinet, medicine cabinet.
They shouldn't call it medicine because I don't I try my best to not be one
of those who have medicine. But you do it when you grow.
And I have heard horror stories where men say they go in there and literally

(48:50):
in that cabinet or even your bathroom.
They can tell if you're going to be high maintenance because you have too much
makeup. makeup, clean out the clutter females.
So what if you wear makeup or foundation or whatever you want to wear,
but make sure you clean out the clutter and you don't have any makeup set in the past six months.
It's any expiration you need to throw out. Some people just keep it,

(49:13):
keep it, keep it. I'm going to use that. I'm going to use that.
But to a man, that'd be like, you are high maintenance.
And then also how about when you go into somebody's medicine cabinet and And
there's a whole bunch of medicine.
It was also something leaked one time about a famous actor, I think.
And the person went into their cabinet and seen because they know the medicine

(49:34):
names, a whole bunch of medicine. It actually was medicine for a serious STD.
So sometimes it does work in your advantage before you go ahead and you want
to live with somebody in Maradona. You better you better know that,
you know, why you have all this medication.
Do you understand? I'm still on we are family.
Okay. I slipped out the back door just to tell you it's people who portrayed to be healthy.

(50:01):
We talking about you should know about their fruit because they are portrayed
to be healthy and they not.
I can sit in a conversation with a person saying.
And within that 20 minutes is up, I can tell where they are just talking health.
But the truth of them is not health.
So it's the truth of the reality show. It's so many people I had to literally

(50:23):
walk away from sometime in our conversation and say, you know what?
I got to detox myself because they put so much in my air.
Don't walk around every drama, everything that goes around with the family.
Y'all drill on it and y'all take it to bed. This is where I say you don't want
to watch the evening news.
Well, I have to because I'm political, blah, blah, blah, blah.

(50:44):
If you are, even in political seasons, I will watch what's going on.
But if you're drilling on it, if you're sleeping on it, that means if you're
having nightmares about it,
that means that it's seeped into your subconscious mind. And guess what?
Your whole life the next day, it will meet you the next day and people,

(51:05):
places and things will meet you the next day.
And you'll be saying, wow, this my whole life sound like not only a reality
show, but a political hot mess or scandal.
I hope I'm teaching you something here now because you know about a fruit.
Let's go ahead. Matthew 7, 15, 16.
Beware of false prophets who come to you in sheep clothing, but inwardly they are ravishing wolves.

(51:33):
You will know them by their fruit. It's going to come out.
You can't act like you are, you know, the health guru and in you,
your life is filled with medicine. I'm not saying that you can't turn over and become holistic.
I'm not saying you can't have medicine, but it should be 50, 20, 10.

(51:57):
Have a goal of breaking down that medicine. Work with your doctor to bring it down.
Now, I know there's doctors out there do not want you to let go of medicine. Find another one.
Now, with that being said, you know, you understand that we are still talking about we are family.
We are cleaning out a lot of the junk on the set.

(52:18):
OK, because we were definitely in the Jeffersons. OK, so what we are going to
go ahead and do is we are going to look at some of those fruits.
Well, we know all the families. We know we covered the functional and the functional part.

(52:38):
And to some of the Jeffersons, the functional was the racial tension,
stuff like that in the unknown.
But the functional part is that they did everything with humor.
You understand? We did cover all the stuff you know about the Brady Bunch,
the Cosby Show. Everybody have a functional, they're functional.

(53:00):
Married with Children, the Adam Family, the Monsters, and that,
and the Jeffersons, and also The Good Time, that you know how I felt about The
Good Time, N-O-B-N-D-N-B-N.
If I said that right. So probably not.
It was the end all basically to the good times. So the reason why I am discussing

(53:26):
this part about you should know about a fruit because a lot of people don't know who they are.
And yes, we get ready to go to conclude it with the best family, the Joneses.
OK, now, what do you need to do with your with the fruit? you need to literally
master what's going into your family five senses.

(53:47):
It can be through music, social media, TV, or even movies.
Be very, very careful if you have to start out when they're a kid,
because even in their teams, you should have some control.
If your kids or teenagers are running your play, you are totally backwards and upside down.
And a lot of, I know a lot of of generations do this because it's like,

(54:10):
oh, well, I had a hard life. I'm going to let them have it easy.
They will never suffer. No, no, no. They won't grow. They won't grow. They pain brain growth.
I hate to say it. So you want to balance everything. Have more humor.
Have more laughter in your house.
Yes, you respect each other's space. Okay.
But none of your kids should be in a room and all they're doing is listening

(54:32):
to social media and things that is not going to to expand or increase their horizon.
Okay. So you want to actually stop trying to impress others.
This is coming from, guess what?
Keeping up with the Joneses. Yes, we had to go there.

(54:57):
What happens when you keep up with the Joneses? You don't have an identity.
Do you understand what I'm saying?
You don't feel like you're measuring it up because you don't even know who you
are. And you don't, do you understand what I'm saying? Okay.
You're trying to go out there and buy a Mercedes Benz like you are a doctor, a psychiatrist.

(55:18):
You work in the space department. You're a scientist and you're trying to live like them.
But we all know that you work at the dime store.
Repo comes to your house every two years to take your stuff, your possessions.
I'm not ragging on some of y'all, but y'all have to laugh because we all been there.

(55:39):
OK, I literally myself buy my cars and pay them off.
And I usually, you know, buy like used cars.
So did I teach my daughter? Yeah, she has a Toyota. The best car you can get in is paid for.
So what am I trying to say? because some of y'all know I say you got to fake it till you make it.
You have to fake it till you make it.

(56:03):
What do you do when you are living as the Good Times or the Monsters or the
Adam Family or Married with Children sitcom?
You need to take those light play and you want to, like I said,
say, hey, wait a minute, I want to be like the Jeffersons, right?
On a spiritual being within, thin. You can act like you are.

(56:23):
Fake it till you make it. But you know what?
Budget-wise, stop trying to keep
up with the Jones. You know what happens when you try to be the Jones?
It shows you have no identity.
You have no dreams, no goals for yourself.
This is why so many of your kids grow up.

(56:44):
They run after rock stars, entertainers. They dress like them.
If they cut their hair, they shave their hair off because you didn't teach them
how to find out what's their identity.
And they take it after you. If you keep running around because your neighbors
are walking around and they're wearing boots all summer and then you go run
and get the same boots, do you really want that?

(57:07):
Do you really want to go ahead and surround yourself with colors that you don't
even know that you like because your neighbor house is red?
Oh, I got to get my, I got to paint my walls red. It's a difference between
people who are copycats, people who are duplicators.
You know, God wants you to duplicate, okay? But not like that. You understand?

(57:31):
Become a creator. People say, oh, I'm a creator. No, you're not a creator.
I can spend time with a person and I can tell you exactly what they're getting ready to manifest.
I can tell you if they're creative. I can't because you know what you do? Go do something.
Go buy something like a scarf, something that is you.
And then wash with before you know it, that person got probably the same scarf.

(57:55):
Do that means that people can't go buy stuff? No, I buy stuff.
I go around people and say, you know what? I like that. And I'll tell them.
I think I'm going to get that. And even when I go order it, I don't go and order
a exact thing because I'm thinking, well, that's nice, but maybe I want this to be in this color.
Those things are fine. And, yes, we have people. We have people that we look

(58:16):
up to and we want the best.
But don't try to keep up with the Kardashians either.
We got teenagers out here whose mother is spending money working two jobs.
Father's working two jobs just to keep up with the Kardashians. Oh, my God.
Okay. okay, we are not even going, we don't even want to put that sitcom in here.
But do you understand people copy up for the first lady? I went to churches

(58:40):
and if she wear her hair short, they had their hair short. That's fine. Get your own style.
But when you know you duplicating, you will never be nobody.
I am here to help you find who you are. Do you understand what I'm saying?
Listen, let me tell you something. You should know about your fruits.
You got to be Be careful even with your kids.

(59:02):
Your kids and your teenagers should not be into just listening to gossip,
listening to drama of the day, of the school system, of the college.
They should be busy. Do you understand?
Intelligent kids, you know what they do? Intelligent kids, go and ask anybody
who's very, very successful in life.

(59:23):
Now, some of them ramped it in the street, but it was a time that they turned
around and they set goals.
You can teach your kids to set goals. You can teach a teenager to set goals.
Get them a vision board. You understand what I'm saying? But they have to know
what's right and they have to know what's wrong, because if you don't,
they'll be sitting up there.
Somebody say something to them the wrong way. They got a vision board and something

(59:45):
bad pointing to the person here because they don't even know who their foundation,
their founder is. And that's why I tell you, if you don't know God,
then you right there making a big mistake with your kids anyway.
I love it when I hear kids say God or they know how to pray.
If your kids don't know how to pray, you need to take a step back and figure
out what the blank have I done backwards.

(01:00:09):
At that stage, the only thing you can do is you can go ahead and just set an example for them.
And in your own world and imagination, you can see them praying. in.
Let them see where you run when trouble come, when drama come.
Okay. Your intelligency in people, or even your kids, or even your teams need

(01:00:31):
to be, they are learning about successful people.
They learning about successful places. They learning about successful things.
You know what I'm trying to say? They, their conversation can't always be negative, but,
Because if it is, they are giving you a reflection of what's going on in their mind.
This generation and the generations before were after me, depressing.

(01:00:53):
Oh, my God. They are more depressed than we were.
And some of them, it's nothing wrong with going into and getting help,
showing your kids that you go to counseling.
It's nothing wrong with having several coaches.
But at the same time, a lot of this stuff is going on. Social media is a two-edged sword.

(01:01:14):
It's going to depress you or it's going to bring you up.
Then you say, well, my kids don't listen to social media. They listen to something.
If they got something on their ears, they listen to something you need to know.
Your child could be sitting up there listening to devil worship music.
Now you can't even tell the difference.
You have to know. Well, I just don't know.
My child won't tell me. How can your child not tell you something and they in

(01:01:37):
your house have to eat your food that you bought, don't have no shelter because
it's your shelter. And yet you say, I just don't know.
No, no, no, no. Bring a child in where they should go. And when they grow up,
they're not going to depart from it.
And people say, well, I used to do this with my child. Let me tell you something.
If you did, don't worry about it because then it'll come back to them.

(01:02:01):
But you should know about a fruit because in some sense, it is not going to
come back because the truth is you really wasn't doing what you said she was doing with your child.
So let your child, your teenager, even grown adults.
Do you know now this generation? I heard the generation or pastor Gen Z are
literally now or the price hike in after the post pandemic.

(01:02:26):
They're living home. They say, look, I'm going to live somewhere where I do
my shelter's pay and I don't even have to pay rent.
Listen, make them pay rent because they don't even want to work.
They don't even want to work for no more. And if you notice that everybody around
you, these jobs, the people, they are bringing people out of retirement because
those are the ones that work.

(01:02:47):
But the young generation don't want to work. So don't let them sit in your house
and idle. people know what's going on in their mind.
Okay. I say this, a child is a reader.
It shouldn't be a book that come in your house and your child is not going to
pick it up. Or you can't say, go read this book. Readers become leaders.

(01:03:07):
They can be listened. Now they can listen to ACX. They can listen to things,
know what they listening to. You should be able to recommend commend things to them.
I'm telling you, readers are leaders, okay?
Remember, Ecclesiastes is a season for everything. Yes, you will have a season for everything.
People will have a season for sorrow, a season for sadness, but depending upon

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what happened in your life play, things do happen.
Life do come at your door, but don't drill on it. Don't stay in sorrow, okay?
Remember the man at Bethesda, Jesus was trying to heal him.
He was sitting there looking at the world. Hello?
He was sitting there looking at the world because he was so busy looking at
everybody else or probably sitting up there gossiping about everybody else.

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Is this you? Am I calling somebody's name out here? Okay, I'm sorry.
That he didn't even know that it was time for him to go in the pool and get healed. Don't do that.
Have an identity. I will not hire somebody. And I'm telling you,
when I start hiring, I got volunteers.
I will not hire people who literally don't have no identity.

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They keep up with the Joneses.
Because when you keep up with the Joneses, listen, you lose your true identity.
You don't know who you are. You don't know who you are. The family don't know
who they are. But then you guess what?
That female or male, if that female stay around you and everything you do,
they have to go through it.
You wear your hair purple, they got to wear it purple.

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You wear your hair with styles that's down to your ankle, they got to do it.
Yeah, you can try out stuff and say, I never, that's not bad.
But that shouldn't be your identity. If you love dresses, I don't even wear what I normally wear.
But I won't even say it because we probably got some Jones's conscious people
listening because they'll go buy it.

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And you got people, close people that's supposed
to be your family or friends and they
copy you for everything you hear you see besties go
and say oh we're gonna do this we're gonna dress this so we're gonna
do this we're gonna do that together isn't that cute no it's not
cute because you know why eventually that same person's gonna want your husband
I have seen friends who get pissed I have witnessed this and got pissed and

(01:05:25):
every time that they a friend brought them into the house like you know Elizabeth
Teller did oh my god I forgot her name.
The lady, she stole her husband. And literally what happens is that at that
time, she said, well, she would call her.
The way her play was, and it was a play, it was a true play.

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Elizabeth Taylor's husband died and her best friend, and I cannot remember her name.
She literally, they was the best of friends.
Everything they did, they did it together. And she, whatever she was going through
a season of sorrow, she would call up and they They were, they was next door
and she would come running over Debbie Reynolds.

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And she got to the point where Debbie Reynolds was busy and Debbie Reynolds
would just send her husband.
Well, one day she turned around and she said, oh, they announced that they was getting married.
They was in love. And you know, Elizabeth Taylor had her fun and she lost a
friend. She lost a friend that took years for them to come back together.
God bless both their souls. They are no longer here.

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But I brought that up because it's happening today. day.
So you have to teach your daughter that too. And them sons too.
A man walk around everything that's, you know, he wants everything that you got.
You know, he's going to sit back. His friend going to be admiring you.
If you happy, you get a good meal all the time.
And all you talking about is your wife.

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You know, he's going to be eye-bordering her and he's going to be looking for
a crack of where she is not pleased. Yes. Vice versa.
You don't want that person around your life play because they're going to come
in there and they're going to try to take everything that you have.
Because you know what? Not that they do.
They, they, they woke up one day and said, I'm just going to do that.

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They don't know their own identity. So they living through you.
So what happened as you go on and live your life, they don't want every good
thing that you have because they don't even know what their identity is.
You know, God said to multiply, they go and duplicate what you have exactly.
And see, when I see those people, I laugh because they know my pet peeve is copying.

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But at the same time, you know what I'm saying? You don't have no identity.
You are a duplicator. You are a follower.
And in some cases, when it's a client, relationship, mentee,
mentor, you, a counselor, client, some things, and depending upon what type
of person and you are, if you're transparent,

(01:07:51):
sometimes you have to learn how to not be so transparent,
because they figure everything you do touch gold and they want to be that way.
But you have to teach them, you are not here to be me.
You can literally learn from me and of me because that's what they did with Jesus.

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Jesus came to set an example, just in case some of Y'all didn't know that,
right? So with that being said.
Let's go ahead and tell you the ending. Let's go ahead. We crack the code.
You know how you have to be original. You have to be a creator.
You understand what I'm saying? And you have to have your own identity.

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Not having your own identity manifests depression all day long in your family.
Okay? Don't blame your kids. They learn it from you. So you have to set an example.
On. Let's see what the Bible have to say.
Philippians 4, 8, finally, brothers, brotherens, whatever things are true,

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whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure,
whatever things are lovely,
whatever things that good report, if there be any virtue and if there be any
good praiseworthy, meditate on these things.
See what you do all day long or mostly. Now, I know you got to go to work.
Leave your work when you come back home.
If you work in the house like I do, it's a time that you cut off and you say, okay, I'm finished.

(01:09:20):
Shut all your technology down, shut your computer down, and then go and do what makes you happy.
Comedy, laughter, movies with my family, all of that makes me feel so good.
If your family's not into all of that, then you go ahead and watch your own
movie and let them just see example.
You might be surprised when they come and say, can I watch that with you? So it depends.

(01:09:43):
Believe it or not, as thick as I am, joy is when I'm walking,
doing some type of exercise.
In my case, you know, I have exercise equipment. Should I do more? Yes.
With that, that's none of your business. Okay. But I literally...
Know who I am. I'm still finding myself out because that's the way God have it.

(01:10:06):
Because you really don't know who you are until you know who God is.
So this is the secret. That's the real secret.
But you notice that in Philippians 4.8, it didn't say just look at excellent things.
It was saying just things, noble things, whatever.
This goes back to what your kids should be listening to, what they should be seeing.
Now, I can't tell you, oh my God, don't get into horrors. I mean,

(01:10:29):
I have been into horror films certain seasons, especially when the wintertime come.
But you still want to be careful because if you're having a nightmare,
that's your subconscious mind telling you.
If that's all you watch is people getting cut up, blown up and all of that,
watch that person's conversation.
That person might have a conversation with whatever the news is showing you

(01:10:50):
what was in that horror. That's why even reality shows.
If you come out, somebody asks me, is it bad? bad. No, I used to watch reality shows.
But if you find yourself always walking around and you are talking like the
housewife of Atlanta, Miami.
Potomac, whatever, California, whatever, LA, and you start acting like them

(01:11:13):
and you start bumping your head and you're telling everybody,
bye, Felicia, you have to be very careful with that because that means that
you are picking up that person, those characters.
You have your own life play now, I hope, if you don't and you're listening to
this and you younger, have your goals set, have a vision board set to what you want.

(01:11:33):
And parents, make sure that your children, you are setting a good example for them.
You cannot blame kids, you know what I'm saying, to say, well,
this person, my children took over, took my set over and they holding me hostage.
You really need to come and find me.

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And I'm here. I give counseling. And what else do I do?
I'm going to talk about a couple of stuff. You know, my Whisper Vibes team gave
me something. So that's I guess that's what's new.
And then also I want to talk about those people that keep it with the Joneses,
those people who don't have no identity.
How did what do you do when you meet them at work?
How do you hire these people or do you hire them?

(01:12:17):
Thank you. I went so far over. But guess what was new was new as I went to Texas.
I went to a couple places. I flew here, here, here, here, here.
I spent my time at a castle. Thank you, Rashida, who provided, I don't care, a castle.
She respected my space. I respected her space.

(01:12:37):
And it was just brilliant because I learned a lot about myself.
I learned a lot about, because I didn't stop meditating and praying now.
I didn't go through her house and try to turn her head around like,
you know, like a religious, whatever, ping bone.
Texas, everything is bigger. The houses are beautiful.
The houses are mansions. That's why people are moving down there.

(01:13:00):
The weather, depending upon where you live at, because every city is different.
I don't, it reminds me a little bit about Florida, but I feel like the highway
system, especially around in Dallas, us as a roller coaster.
Nana, Nana, Nana. It has its downs, but I'm going to focus on the good.

(01:13:22):
The good is that the people is a community. They are a community of people.
I mean, you really just think like, wow, these people are here to help each
other. And I'm talking about the black and brown community.
So I really shout out to the book, to the doc bookstore, shout out to the poetry
poets, excuse me, and the poetry that I heard in person was wonderful.

(01:13:49):
Now we're going to talk about Blackology. It's out for black and brown women.
And listen for the Fenella sisters or the white sisters.
That's what I'm talking about. The book is for you too, because you can learn
something from it. You can learn something about respecting us.
The original, the original, the original, the original.
I'm not going to tell you no more about the book, but go order it. It's everywhere.

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And where's my next stop for book signing? You missed me in Texas.
I got a couple places that I'm trying to do, do, plan to do.
But right now I am writing two more books.
I can't tell you what's next with the books because we have some Jones's consciousness
and all they want to do is copy.

(01:14:31):
Remember something. If loving yourself is.
Music.