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January 13, 2020 5 mins

Give constructive feedback with a more authentic approach

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Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of I Heart Radio.
Good Morning. This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast.
Today's tip is to skip the sandwich method of giving
feedback and try something a little more effective and authentic.

(00:23):
Giving feedback to employees or colleagues can be challenging. No
one really likes having difficult conversations, even when something definitely
needs to change. Consequently, organizations often train new managers to
give what is known as the feedback sandwich. You start
with something positive about the person, then you share the
negative feedback, then you end with something positive again. This

(00:48):
approach has its merits. Sometimes hard news is easier to
swallow in the middle of compliments, but the approach can
feel inauthentic, especially if the person knows something unpleasant is coming.
The compliments can totally get lost in this sense of dread.
Or occasionally, though much less often, this approach is completely

(01:09):
ineffective if someone who isn't terribly self aware, here's the
compliments and decides that the negative feedback is just one
note of many, as opposed to the reason for the
conversation in any case, I recently read about another strategy
which I think comes across as far more authentic. Jamie Hammond,

(01:30):
a social media manager, wrote a post for Medium recently
describing what she calls the tacos approach to giving difficult feedback. Yep,
we are ditching sandwiches for tacos. Tacos is an acronym
for thank, acknowledge, cause, orient, and support. Here's what each

(01:54):
step entails. First, you thank the person for something, Hammond says,
even if it's just showing up. Then you acknowledge the
problem head on. Hammond says, there's no point beating around
the bush if you and the other person both know
the reason you called this meeting. Pretending otherwise can just
be insulting. You're both adults, so let's acknowledge what the

(02:18):
problem is. The sea then stands for cause, which Hammond
says means explaining other issues that the problem is causing.
You want to give the person context for why the
issue really needs to be addressed. Oh stands for orient.
You need to orient the other person toward the behavior

(02:38):
you want instead. This can be the most constructive part
of the conversation. Sometimes people know that something has gone awry,
but they have no idea what they should be doing. Differently,
so come into these conversations with practical solutions. Finally, and
probably the most important part, the S stands for support.

(03:00):
Remind the person that you support him or her, says Hammond.
You can do this by thanking the person again, asking
them what you can do to support them, or asking
them if something is going on that is preventing them
from achieving the new solution handled right, this emphasis on
support can actually make your relationship stronger going forward, and

(03:21):
if you do intend to keep working together well, that
is the best possible outcome. So that's the feedback tacos approach. Thanking,
acknowledging the problem, talking about the problems the issue is causing,
orienting the person toward new behavior, and reiterating support. If

(03:42):
you need to give tough feedback in the next few days,
you might consider trying this and seeing how it goes.
If you do, let me know. You can email me
at Before Breakfast podcast at i heeart media dot com.
In the meantime, this is Laura. Thanks for listening and
here's to making the most of our time. Hey, everybody,

(04:09):
I'd love to hear from you. You can send me
your tips, your questions, or anything else. Just connect with
me on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram. At Before Breakfast pod
that's b the number four, then Breakfast p o D.
You can also shoot me an email at Before Breakfast podcast.
At i heeart media dot com that before Breakfast is

(04:32):
spelled out with all the letters. Thanks so much, I
look forward to staying in touch. Before Breakfast is a
production of I heart Radio. For more podcasts from my
heart Radio, visit the i heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. Four

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Laura Vanderkam

Laura Vanderkam

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