Strengthen a memory

Dwelling in the past isn’t always a bad thing

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of I Heart Radio.
Good Morning, This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast.
Today's tip is that you can actively strengthen a memory.
If there is a pleasant spot in your past you'd

(00:23):
like to think about more often, or even if you
know something good is coming up, you can secure its
place in your thoughts, which is preferable to dwelling on
bad memories or future worries. Life is made up of memories,
but many of us have a faulty impression of how

(00:44):
memory works. We think it's like a filing cabinet. Things
go in basically as they happen, and though they may
fade with age, they are basically there as they were,
But in fact the situation is more co located. It
is well known that memories can be planted when they

(01:05):
seem convincing. There's also some fascinating research that we can
strengthen memories after the fact when we decide that we
need them. Perhaps you have seen this in your own life.
If someone you knew vaguely in the past winds up
in the news for some reason, you find yourself remembering
a lot more details of your encounters than you ever

(01:28):
would have had reason to recount otherwise, that quirk of
memory is neither here nor there. The reason this is
useful knowledge is that when we know memories can be
shaped and made more polished, we can take active steps
to do that. With good memories, we can think of
memory as more of a garden than a filing cabinet.

(01:52):
When we actively choose to cultivate certain plants, they flourish
and become the dominant thing we see whenever we visit.
Here is how this works. Think of a recent happy memory,
really try to think about it. Think about your senses.

(02:13):
What were you seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting, touching, Think through
the sequence of events. Think about how you would recount
the story if you took photos. Look at those photos
and try telling the story while using the photos to
nudge your memory. Write the story down in a journal.

(02:36):
Tell someone else about the experience. If someone was with you,
make a point of talking about the experience with them.
Talk about it multiple times. If you have any artifacts
from the experience, you know souvenirs, concert t shirts, look
at those. If there is a way to revisit parts

(02:58):
of the experience again, like listening to a song from
that time, or making a recipe. Do that, and as
you do, think of the memory again. As an example,
I've been trying to do this with a recent little
adventure I had with my eleven year old son. We
drove to a nearby tulip farm. Together. He picked twenty

(03:20):
tulips to bring home. We got lobster rules from a
food truck that was parked by the farm, and we
sat in the grass and ate them together. They were
really incredible lobster rolls. Now, it wasn't a life altering event,
but it was very pleasant, and so I've been thinking

(03:41):
about the colors of the tulip field. I remember the
smell of the dust in the parking lot. I remember
the smell of spring flowers, and the cool feel of
the grass, and the sweet taste of lobster on a
buttered roll. I remember my son's exclamation of how good
the roll tasted. I took pictures and looked at the

(04:04):
pictures afterwards. He and I talked about it. I looked
at the tulips and vases on my kitchen counter. Those
will wilt soon, I know, but I can linger and
look at them now. And of course he and I
have mapped that lobster food trucks, schedule to see if
we can get rules again in the future, which will

(04:25):
cement the Saturday afternoon at the tulip farm into our
memories even more, All of this can make a memory brighter.
It can make a particular memory sparkle like a spring tulip.
You could do this with any good memory, and this
works prospectively too. When you know a good event is

(04:46):
coming up, you can take steps to make sure the
memory will stand out. Talk about what's going on with
the people who are there with you, find some sort
of artifact, make sure you are paying attend chin, taking
mental notes, and being fully aware. How will you recount

(05:06):
this story, and then make plans to recall this memory afterwards.
The more you do, the stronger the memory becomes. Dwelling
in the past gets a bad reputation, but I think
there is much to recommend it. Dwelling on a happy
memory is often better than worrying about the present. It

(05:28):
is definitely better than dwelling on bad memories, which we
can be want to do. Do yourself a favor and
cultivate the garden. Life will feel better as a result.
In the meantime. This is Laura. Thanks for listening and

(05:49):
here's to making the most of our time. Hey everybody,
I'd love to hear from you. You can send me
your tips, your questions, or anything else. Just connect with
me on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram at Before Breakfast Pod.

(06:09):
That's b E the number four, then Breakfast p o D.
You can also shoot me an email at Before Breakfast
podcast at iHeartMedia dot com that Before Breakfast is spelled
out with all the letters. Thanks so much, I look
forward to staying in touch. Before Breakfast is a production

(06:33):
of I heart Radio. For more podcasts from I heart Radio,
visit the i heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever
you listen to your favorite shows.