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How to handle less-than-helpful advice

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
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(00:42):
to you by the United States Forest Service and the
ad Council. Look for your children's eyes and you will
discover the true magic of a forest. Find a forest
near you and start exploring it. Discover the Forest dot
Org brought to you by the United States Forest Service
and the AD Counts. Good morning, This is Laura. Welcome

(01:08):
to the New Corner Office, the podcast where we share
strategies for thriving in the new world of work, where
location and hours are more flexible than in the past.
Today's tip is about how to deal with feedback that
isn't entirely helpful. The good news is that it's possible
to make the person giving feedback feel heard without getting

(01:30):
terribly distracted yourself. The best response thank you for your feedback.
I'm writing that down. Thoughtful feedback is a wonderful gift.
Somebody has taken the time to analyze what you've done
and figure out ways to improve it. I'm sure we
can all remember transformative criticism and praise. We should do
what we can to welcome such feedback into our lives.

(01:53):
But sometimes feedback can be less helpful. Maybe it comes
at an an opportune moment, maybe it's about something beyond
our control, or maybe it's just not actionable unless the
person is offering the feedback in a mean spirited way. Though,
you want to make sure he or she knows that
feedback is still welcome and you value the person's thoughts

(02:13):
and time. Sometimes we can convey this embody language, but
when you work from home and maybe talking to the
person on the phone, this is a little more challenging.
Hence the phrase, thank you for your feedback, I'm writing
that down. Thanking the person is straightforward. You're not promising
to use the feedback, you're just acknowledging that it was received.

(02:37):
And as for saying I'm writing that down, well, this
is about showing the person that you're taking their thoughts seriously.
And since they probably can't actually see you, saying that
you are writing the feedback down will help the person
feel confident that you are paying attention. There's no actual
downside to writing down the thought. You're under no obligation
to do anything with it, and if you do want

(02:58):
to refer to the thought later, well what's there the
council to write down what others say. May be familiar
to parents, Many of us have heard the advice to
show children we're taking their concerns seriously by recording them,
whether we do anything with the records or not. But
it turns out that it's validating to people of all
ages to know that what they say is being noted

(03:19):
and thus acknowledged and valued. So today, if someone offers
less than helpful feedback, try this response, thank you for
your feedback, I'm writing that down. It will give you
a ready way to acknowledge the person's thoughts without getting
distracted by them. You can appreciate the person even if
any particular comment doesn't do much for you. How do

(03:44):
you respond to less than helpful feedback. I'd love to
hear about it. You can let me know at Laura
at Laura Vanderkam dot com. In the meantime, this is Laura.
Thanks for listening, and here's the succeeding in the New
Corner Office. The New Corner Office is a production of

(04:05):
I Heart Radio. For more podcasts, visit the I Heart
Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your favorite shows.

(04:26):
Unto Hi, I'm Hillary Clinton and I'm so excited to
be back with a third season of You and Me Both.
When I started this podcast, we were going through some
tough times, and let's face it, we still are. And
here's what I know. We cannot get through this alone.

(04:47):
So please join me for more conversations with people who
will make you think, make you laugh, and help us
find a path forward. This season, I'll be talking about
the state of our democracy with experts and with people
organizing on the ground. We'll draw inspiration from some amazing
people like Olympic star Allison Felix and Grammy Award winner

(05:10):
Brandy Carlisle. And we'll get into the hard stuff with
writer Cheryl Strait and my dear friend and colleague Huma Aberdeen.
So join us. Listen to you and me both on
the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcast or wherever you
get your podcasts. Look for your children's eyes and you

(05:39):
will discover the true magic of a forest. Find a
forest near you and start exploring it. Discover the forest
dot Org brought to you by the United States Forest
Service and the AD Council