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November 11, 2021 5 mins

How to move a conversation along

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Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of I Heart Radio.
Good Morning, This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast.
Today's tip is to ask what's next for you today?
When you're in a conversation that has stopped going anywhere.

(00:25):
This one little phrase can move things forward, but without
seeming rude. We have all found ourselves in conversations that
start out meaningful and then end up retreading the same
ground over and over again. Maybe your conversation partner starts
meandering when they're nervous or worked up about an issue,

(00:48):
or maybe they're just avoiding going to do a difficult project.
Sometimes the conversation itself is fine, but you need to
make a call, or you're trying to get out on time.
There are all sorts of reasons that a conversation needs
to be moved along, and unfortunately this can feel awkward

(01:08):
saying okay, I gotta go and feel abrupt. Or we
make some excuse like I have to go answer an
email that sounds not entirely authentic because when have we
ever not needed to answer an email? Or you start
trying to surreptitiously check the time. Trust me, everyone notices.

(01:30):
So rather than that Try this little phrase the next
time you get the chance to talk what's next for
you today? You can transition to this however you want
fascinating story, what's next for you today? Or I love
how passionate you are about this what's next for you today?

(01:52):
Or yes, I agree, we definitely need Kim involved in
this project. I'll send her a note what's next for
you today? This phrase does a few good things. First,
it is a fairly straightforward question. Unless you are at
a late night function, there usually is something else going
on in the day. If you're at work, or at

(02:14):
the bus stop, or at school pickup or at a
kids activity, there is no doubt something next in the
day for everyone. You are asking what that is. Second,
you keep the conversation focused on your partner. You are
not ending the conversation because you have something better to do.

(02:35):
You're just asking them what's next in their day. But
this little question prompts them to think about what's coming
up and what else they need to do. You gently
let them know that the conversation is ending. It's time
to focus on what's ahead now. It is possible that

(02:55):
the reason the person is lingering is because they don't
want to do whatever as next, but this trepidation might
come up, in which case you can offer support before
heading on your way. The conversation becomes more meaningful again,
which is at least better than what it was. You
could even decide to skip the today part of that

(03:17):
phrase if it doesn't fit well. If this is a
general getting to know you sort of conversation, asking what's
next for you without the today allows you to find
out something interesting about the person, what are their upcoming
hopes and desires? You figure out more specifically what you
can help with. That is better then conversational meandering. So

(03:44):
it is worth adding this phrase to your repertoire. You
can change the whole conversation quickly. If you have particular
phrases that you find helpful in conversations, please let me
know you and write to me at Laura at Laura
vander caam dot com. In the meantime, this is Laura.

(04:09):
Thanks for listening and here's to making the most of
our time. Hey, everybody, I'd love to hear from you.
You can send me your tips, your questions, or anything else.
Just connect with me on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram at

(04:30):
Before Breakfast Pod. That's b the number four, then Breakfast
p o D. You can also shoot me an email
at Before Breakfast podcast at i heeart media dot com
that Before Breakfast is spelled out with all the letters.
Thanks so much, I look forward to staying in touch.

(04:53):
Before Breakfast is a production of I Heart Radio. For
more podcasts from my heart Radio, visit the i heart
Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your
favorite shows. H m hm

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Laura Vanderkam

Laura Vanderkam

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