April 1, 2024 • 53 mins
On this edition of April FoolsTrend, Jack and Miles discuss April Fools' Day jokes (both personal and corporate), People stealing stuff from Air Force One and selling it, Transgender Day of Visibility being on thesame day as Easter (and the Right lost their minds), Niagara Falls declaring a state of emergency over eclipse tourists, and much more!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hello the Internet, and welcome to this special week Trend edition.
I guess they're getting less special since we've been doing
it for about it close to a year now.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
But it's special in that it's a departure from the
norm of.
Speaker 1 (00:14):
Our departure, a little bit of a break from the norm.
To quote my favorite rapper, Uh is that Will Smith? Anyways,
I'm Jack O'Brien. That is Miles Gray. It is April
Fool's Day. Oh shit, wait, I am Miles Gray, and
I am hold on, I am my name Don Ronald
(00:42):
Donald brin Let me like.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
I am John DeSantis.
Speaker 1 (00:48):
Yeah, fucking got you, guys.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
It's a fucking joke.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
If you should have seen the fucking look on your
because yeah, I got scary. You kind of went away
there for a second.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
Yeah I know who you were. Yeah, it kind of
fucked me up.
Speaker 1 (01:06):
I can tell you're something came over your face. Yeah,
I was like, am I John Deceand who is? Anyways?
I mean we're we're going to get into it. It's
April Folds and the pranks are coming fast and thick,
especially in my household. Can tell by my household, I mean,
(01:29):
you know, we have the sign out front, and we
have one of the things you know that we have
on there is that in this house we believe that
Elon Musk is the funniest comedian.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
Oh my god, dude killing it today. Lock him up
for murder because he's killing it with the jokes. And
also maybe lock him up for murder.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
Yeah, just generally something there.
Speaker 2 (01:52):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
So we're going to get into the things that trended
over the weekend, the things that are trending right now.
But before we do that, we do like to get
to know each other a little bit better, Yes, by
telling you some things we think are underrated and overrated. Yeah,
you want to start, You want me to start?
Speaker 2 (02:12):
Yeah? Sure, Which what are we doing? Unders unders unders
for unders to say underrated just after seeing some posts
on the internet this last Easter Sunday, the servers and
kitchen staff on these holiday brunch days underrated because I
(02:32):
think in the past we talk a lot about like
during the holidays, especially Valentine's Day, that seems to be
the like the moment in the service industry that people
are like it's fucked up, Like it's high tension. There's
a lot of expectations and it bleeds over into But
I'm seeing just from like people's screeds about shitty easter
(02:53):
brunches that they've had that like come off as like
you sound like a fucking entitled prick actually does like you,
I had the worst fucking Easter brunch ever in memory,
it sounds like your server did. Yeah, no, and like
the ability and then like this whole thing, Like I
saw a couple I'll be honest, I saw three different
(03:13):
Instagram stories from people that like I'm not really friends with,
but you know, just like people like people you've interacted
with the past, so you follow them, and like they
were all versions of like the service was like awful,
although like it would always be like all these insults
to the kitchen staff, the white staff, and then it's like,
but the server was trying to be paid, like trying
to soften like the preceding nonsense that was being described
(03:37):
in the post, to try and soften that blow, right,
and again, I just like seeing how people are deciding
to even go public about how terrible their easter brunches.
I'm like, no, it's the people that have to fucking
deal with you and not like throw hot tea on
your head that they they are the true heroes truly
and so yeah, and I think it's just it's just
(03:58):
one of those things where all these days, like it's
like these moments where strained familial relationships and expectations just
inevitably spill over into how you interact with white staff.
For the people at the restaurant. Yeah, and you know,
I just think they got a string of them coming up.
We got Eastern Brunch, you got Mother's Day Brunch. That's
gonna be another one where people are gonna fucking freak out. So,
(04:19):
you know, A salute to.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
Them dads and grads.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
Yeah, yeah, I feel like I don't know, do people
lose it as much on I feel like people don't
give a shit about their dads enough to be like, yeah,
special for you dad, Like it's more mom that you're like,
no's gotta be right for my fucking mom. Leave dad
alone dead anyway, Yeah, I salute them because I've already
seen there's already posts like I like to go on
(04:43):
trip Advisor too, to look at just what the roundup
is for angry people. I just love reading like fucking
seething reviews of places because it's more just a look
into the person than like a river flection the restaurant
most of the time.
Speaker 1 (04:57):
Yeah, some of the wildest shit from people who think
that they're telling you helpful information about how bad their
dining experience was. And also I wonder, I do wonder
zaigang who works in you know, who's worked service industry
during these holidays. I'm curious if there is like a hierarchy,
(05:17):
like if Easter is worse because people are coming from
church and so they're like, well, I already did my
good shit for the week. I can treat this person.
Speaker 2 (05:30):
I already shouted out the resurrection. So I'm always find
a fucking scream at somebody.
Speaker 1 (05:35):
We're good here. Yeah, yeah, I don't know. Yeah, let
us know if you if you have a if you
have a ranking of like worst days, I feel.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
Like Mother's Day has to be there, Like you know
what I mean, Like is it's built around this parental
relationship and all the trauma that comes along with that.
And like in a day where you're pretending to depending
on your relationship with the mother, could be celebratory, could
be like passive, aggressive, could be like I have to
do this was my mom's in a fucking freak out
and then you know, I don't know, but tell us,
(06:05):
you tell us, you tell us.
Speaker 1 (06:08):
My underrated is celebrities bullshit, like the just the shit
they have laying around their house. Apparently there's a New
Yorker article about how the celebrity memorabilia market is booming,
like like rich people instead of putting a van Go
up on the wall, are putting like Kurt Cobaine's sweater
(06:30):
from the MTV Unplugged on their wall. And first of all,
I'm not here to say one way or another. I
can tell you which one I'd be more impressed with,
and it ain't the Van Go. But apparently the price
goes up the dirtier it is, like the Cobaine sweater
apparently has like I think what they described is like
(06:53):
a brown crust in one of the pockets that people
speculate is probably vomit given where he was at during
that performance.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
What he's vomiting in his pocket like a little kid.
Speaker 1 (07:04):
Yeah, just like a little quick vomit in the pocket.
We've all been there. But that raises the price, Like
the price goes down if the sweater or you know,
the piece of memorabilia has been washed or disinfected, right,
Like we want they're funk all over it, like we
want it to be filthy.
Speaker 2 (07:24):
You want their vomit in it.
Speaker 1 (07:26):
Yeah, like a jack off rag from Kirk Cobain would
be like the highest value thing that people could think of.
Speaker 2 (07:34):
Yeah, like a spunk sock of yeucking Kirk cobain is.
You know what's wild though, too? This sweater like it's
a cardigan. It's so nondescript that like I'm seeing people
replicate it like just to be like like the style,
and I feel like now it makes me want to
be like, you know what that sweater is? I got
here right right, that's a fucking unplugged fucking Nirvana. That's
(07:56):
Kirk sweater dude. Yeah, exactly. Don't mind the price, deg.
Speaker 1 (08:00):
But I think this this makes a lot of sense
for the same reason we've been like speculating, like with
the a lot of the experiences people were having around
Taylor Swift concerts being comparable to like religious experiences, right
and uh, you know, tracking the rise of a kind
of spiritual almost like quasi spiritual relationship to celebrity with
(08:26):
the fall of religion. And this this just feels like
almost a one to one, Like, I'm pretty sure the
Catholic Church has things that were I mean they have
like the mythical Kirk Cobaine sweater from their own plugged Yeah,
the Shroud of Turin. Yeah, like they had to invent
a thing like that's honestly, they would fuck with this
(08:49):
kind of logic. Yeah yeah, this was touched by you know,
John Paul the second.
Speaker 2 (08:57):
The thing is like even with the Shroud of Turin,
I'm like, I don't know if you existed. I know,
Kirk Colebain existed. I've seen that unplugged, So that has
fucking value to me. That could be any old fucking
shroud of anywhere, could be Stroud of Norwalk, California, falling.
Speaker 1 (09:10):
Yeah yeah, but yeah, I mean i know, like the
Catholic Church sells like metals blessed by the Pope, and
I'm sure those medals would go for way more if
they like promised that the Pope had you know, like
fallen asleep and drooled on it or whatever.
Speaker 2 (09:25):
Oh yeah, I mean, like think about how much people
were like paying for like a hotel bill that was
signed by like John John Lennon and Yoko when they
were like in that hotel forever, right, Yeah, people would
just be like that scrap from room service six figures instantly.
Speaker 1 (09:39):
Yeah, but it's like it's an it has an inverse
relationship to how I would feel about any other human. Like,
so if you said that you were selling the sheet
from that picture where there he's like naked and like
spooning her like kind of monk key style. Like if
(10:02):
you sold that sheet, I think people would be super
into it. Oh yeah, Like it would go for like
a million dollars if there's like Pubes on it, dude, Yeah,
if there's Pubes on it, even better. But like if
it was literally anybody else and you're checking into that
hotel room, like, it would be the worst thing that
you could possibly imagine.
Speaker 2 (10:23):
It's all context, baby, But.
Speaker 1 (10:25):
The article says the market kind of went up during
COVID because people were at home with money, and again
this like mainstream media thing of like people were on
a spending spree just you know during COVID once they
got that stimulus check, just like the media likes to
paint this version of us that like you get the
stimulus check and thenies just like people like passed out
(10:50):
in a pile of like half unboxed flat screen TVs.
But so they're attributing it to that like feeling nostalgic
and at home. And but I would add that they
were afraid of death now more than ever. And yes,
like that this gives you a connection to Like the
(11:10):
quotes throughout the article are people being like, this is
immortality right there, Like this touching this Eric clapt In
stratocaster that was gifted to him by right, you know,
George Harrison, this is the one.
Speaker 2 (11:24):
You put down when he saw Jimmy Hendrix play live
for the first time and rethought everything in terms of
guitar playing. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:31):
Yeah, it's just trying like connecting to immortality in some
way via Kirk Coban's dried vomiting her pocket.
Speaker 2 (11:39):
Also, way better stuff to collect than fucking Harlan Crow's
like Hitler crap.
Speaker 1 (11:44):
Right, you know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (11:45):
That's a room even if it's like niche, Like, no
one's gonna be like, oh, I don't know about all
this Kurt Cobain stuff, Like they'll be like, oh okay, dude,
that's fine. Was like you want to see a Nazi
t set?
Speaker 1 (11:56):
They did say they said that they study how disinfection
related to celebrity memorabilia and so with uh, like Kurt Cobain,
the dirtier the better. With Hitler, they were people were like, yeah,
could you run that through the wash real quick? Yeah,
(12:17):
like who we'd love to get.
Speaker 2 (12:19):
Kind of freaky, but I still want it.
Speaker 1 (12:21):
I still want it, which I'm a little surprised by.
Like I feel like the people who are into Nazi
ship like would be like, I like want whatever the
closest is to the experience of Hitler taking a ship
on my head, right, you know, because that is that
was how he related.
Speaker 2 (12:38):
I remember super producer Ana was saying, ask if we
watched The Gentleman The New Guy Richie.
Speaker 1 (12:43):
Yeah, been I watched the first two ups.
Speaker 2 (12:45):
Okay, well I won't spoil it, but there is someone
who's really into some Hitler ship and something very specific
that is a piece of Hitler memorabilia that's obviously fake
for the show, but it encapsulates literally what you're saying,
like to almost near a tea.
Speaker 1 (13:01):
Yeah. Well, Hitler was like that was his fetish and
like to the point that he like needed that in
order to get off. Was a woman shitting on his head.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
So oh oh, well this is a little bit different.
But oh okay, but it's it's let's just say it
is a physical remnant of Adolf Hitler. Oh god, that
someone's really into collecting in this show.
Speaker 1 (13:24):
All right, Uh, what's overrated, Miles?
Speaker 2 (13:27):
This overrated? The act of posting through it. This is
something that we see. It's a new phenomenon. Okay, so
it's something that has brought been brought through in the
social media age. And if you're not familiar with when
someone goes oh they're posting through it, it's when someone
is in the midst of some kind of scandal or
controversy drama and everyone knows about it, but they use
(13:50):
their social media to act as if nothing's going on,
you know, or it doesn't bother me, or I'm actually
this is actually really funny to me. That's actually why
I'm posting about it, like really leaning into it. And
there's a great example this Sunday with Sean P. Diddy
love trafficking Combs who posted this man is embroiled in
(14:14):
a pretty dark and seemingly wide reaching criminal controversy with trafficking.
I mean, like Department of Homeland Security is the one
that you got mixed up with not like yeah the cops,
you know what I mean, or like the DEA, or
like oh it his drugs, like homeland security, like the
new one they made up to terrorize like brown people
(14:35):
from the Middle East. That's now they're coming after What
what are you doing? P Diddy? So he posted a
picture of his like I think youngest daughter in easter clothes,
like this is my daughter Love the first of all,
the daughter's name is Love Sean Combs yikes es and
just like yeah, I guess he thought this would help
like reorient his sheet like sinking ship. But there's this
(14:58):
like weird power that I think fame this people think
they have that becomes like, you know, clear when they
do goofy shit like this, like they really think by
just going, well, I want to talk about how cute
my little baby daughter is and not that I'm in
the center of multiple scandals and potentially like one of
the most prolific predators in the music industry, Like that's
(15:19):
enough to change the discourse. And I'm like, sir, just
fucking vanish man, like don't fuck it, like whatever, I mean,
I don't know, like if you're revealing the world that
you think you operate in where you're truly like the
fucking lever polar of all that exists in your reality.
But in this instance, yep, make sure youah a good thing.
Those comments are off, Yeah, just post post through it,
(15:41):
but it's not. It's not doing what you think is doing.
Speaker 1 (15:44):
P Diddy. Yeah, it's like the Kevin Spacey Christmas videos.
Yeah let me be Frank videos, Yes, where he's like,
y'all still love this though. I know you're disgusted by
my some of my behaviors, but.
Speaker 2 (15:58):
Are disgusted by like me right personally. But how about
I remedy that by showing you me.
Speaker 1 (16:05):
Yeah no, but still the play the hits baby all right?
My overrated are the April Fools pranks my kids played
on me this morning. Shots fired just dog shit, you guys.
The signs saying kick me and poop on me and
pe on me all right, Hitler were uninspired. I could
(16:28):
feel you putting them on me. The magnetile obstacle course
that you laid out was perfectly visible before I got
to them. Also, you put toy sharks in the obstacle field.
I like sharks, So I'm not sure what what what
(16:48):
you're going for writing. You are are spelled a E
R nice try start or poop or pepe uninspired so
indecisive by the way, or maybe.
Speaker 2 (17:05):
At my fart or am my poo poop?
Speaker 1 (17:07):
Yeah, thank you, make up your mind. And then when
those stopped working, they just started shooting me in the
butt and penis with nerf guns yep, and hitting me
with foam swords like.
Speaker 2 (17:18):
Yeah, and that's the time honor tradition is shooting your
parents in the junk with some kind of projectile. Yeah,
I remember had the ball Zuka.
Speaker 1 (17:26):
It was funny. They just thought they were just like
immediately like yeah, it's it's a free for all today
because it's I don't know where where they got the
idea that they could just shoot me because it was
April Fool's Day, but that had been discussed prior to
this morning and we went to war.
Speaker 2 (17:45):
Wow, I just love a scathing post mortem on your
children's It's this.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
Is this work in comedy, you guys, Uh, this is
you need to step it up.
Speaker 2 (17:58):
You know, it's so funny disiguring the fuck out of me. Man.
I remember doing this kind of shit and getting a
response same response out of my dad. Is like you
ain't full of nobody with that, Like that's all you got.
I remember. I was so in my fucking bag about that.
I asked my mom the next time. I was like,
I'm gonna do something. Really, I'm gonna really get him
(18:20):
to believe something messed up. And I ran it. I
think I ran it by my mom. I was gonna
say that, like so when my dad like had this
cat for since I was before I was born, so
at the time when I was like six, this cat
was like sixteen or something, and I was like, I'm
gonna fucking tell my dad the cat's dead because I
(18:41):
was shamed so bad. Oh you think these these minuscule
attacks are enough to shit shift me and get me
to believe some shit? Try hard? And I was like
and as a kid, I'm like, okay, harder. I don't
have nuance, so I'll just go to extreme, like your
cat is dead, your foster parents have been killed, woofy
(19:02):
is dead. Like That's where my mind went because I
was like, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (19:05):
What the fucking dumb so did he did he buy it?
Did he bite?
Speaker 2 (19:09):
No? My mom was like the fish don't fuck It's like, no,
don't do that. Yeah, I was talked out of it.
I remember vividly being like this is the answer, and
I think it was like my mom, ly, my grandfather,
somebody be like, no, no, no, that ain't a fool, Like,
don't even do that, like just like put Ben Gay
in his underwear or something. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (19:28):
You may notice that I have clown makeup on, and Okay,
the one prank that I guess was pretty good is
they did tie my shoelaces together and then perfectly, uh
you know, measure the distance that I would fall, so
my head fell into a bucket that I couldn't get off.
(19:49):
And then when I pulled the bucket off, I did
have clown makeup all over my face. So I guess
that one. Well, he got me. Guys, but yeah, I
don't know. You need work would be my grade.
Speaker 2 (20:02):
See, kids, don't go don't go extreme on it, you
know what I mean. Just you know, I think I
think you should take your father's critiques as a sign
that they actually they got to him, and that's his
only defense. Now, No, they didn't get to me. It's fine. No,
your dad is posting through it. He's posting through it.
Your dad it's fine.
Speaker 1 (20:22):
Crying a little bit. Yeah, I'm poo poo at work.
Speaker 2 (20:30):
Bullshit, I'm John DeSantis. I don't know.
Speaker 1 (20:35):
All right, let's take a quick break and we'll come
back and talk about some news stories. We'll be right back.
And we're back. We are back, and we are back.
And Sunday, March thirty first, was Transgender Day of Visibility.
(21:00):
It was also, as you may have heard, the day
that Christians eat chocolate bunny rabbits to celebrate Easter, and
a ton of right wing people freaked out because they
claimed the White House issued a proclamation celebrating Transgender Day
of Visibility and people were like, that's Biden is attacking Easter.
(21:26):
Mike Johnson called the overlapping occasions abhorrant on Twitter, while
presumably like just barely keeping himself from jacking off to
porn and having a record of his jack off session
sent to his son.
Speaker 2 (21:43):
The Covenant Eyes man still fucking with the Covenant Eyes.
Speaker 1 (21:46):
Yeah, his his app that does that.
Speaker 2 (21:48):
Yeah. Yeah, But I mean, also, dude, every everybody had
the most bad faith takes. Christy Nome said Joe Biden
banned religious themed eggs at the White House. Easter egg
design contest for kids, and he announced that tomorrow's National
Transgender Visibility Day. Did he forget that tomorrow's Easter Resurrection Sunday?
That kind of sounds like a like a sporting event.
(22:11):
Joe Biden in his White House blah blah blah blah blah,
Newt Gingrich as President Biden literally out of touch with reality?
Literally literally out of touch with what? And how is
he touching reality?
Speaker 1 (22:23):
Literally? How would you literally be in touch with reality?
Speaker 2 (22:27):
Is it like that like that fresco that's in the
Sistine Chapel, like where God and Adam or like touching fingers.
Is that like the like in my mind, that's being
in touch with reality in a weird way, like touching God. Anyway,
I said, why would he take away Christian Christianity's holiest
day Easter and declared to be quote transgender Day of Visibility? Why?
I say we would be irritated whenever he did it,
(22:49):
but doing it on Easter is an obscene insult to
every Christian. Oh ah, interesting, because that's that's exactly what happened,
And that's exactly that That's exactly what happened.
Speaker 1 (23:01):
He day before he was like, oh, Tomorrow's Easter. Let
me do this thing that's gonna piss off Christians because
the whole world revolves around them, and we'll make it
in your face trans day of Visibility in your face Christians.
Oh wait, it's always been trans Visibility Day March thirty. First,
(23:25):
it doesn't change year to year. Unlike Easter, Easter falls
on different dates. I didn't realize it was like moon based, Yeah,
because the moon's phases determined Easter's date. Western Easter is
the first Sunday after the first full moon after the equinox,
while Eastern Easter is after Passover. That's I mean, that makes.
Speaker 2 (23:47):
More sense, right because the setting of the passion is
during Passover, right, you know what I mean? So, like
I remember Her Majesty was like, how come pass Over
in Eastern like Art just locked in at the same
time in the Bible, isn't that what's happening, like when
He's getting crucified, Like, wasn't the Last Supper like potentially
some kind of satyr maybe, But then then we had
(24:10):
I did this whole thing, and I looked into it,
I'm like, oh, it's like the Council of the Elves
of Trent made this proclamation in three thirty that Easter
shall be the first Sunday after the full moon, after
the equinox, and then I'm like, oh, okay, they.
Speaker 1 (24:27):
Just kind of witchy for Christianity to be like into
the phases of the moon.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
A lot of that stuff is they don't want to
talk about it.
Speaker 1 (24:35):
Yeah, a lot of druids, ye, und.
Speaker 2 (24:38):
Yeah, a lot of night elves working in there. But yeah, again,
like it's just so stupid to be like the heat
changed it. This is they fucking do this every time
there's a national day, the president, the Office of the
President says like, oh yeah, it's it's proclaimed that this
day is this day. That's been this day for over
a decade now. And then the other attack that people
have been going on is like and they banned religious designs.
(25:02):
That has been the fucking rules for forty five fucking
years or however long this thing has been happening across
really all administrations. It's like, dude, we don't need religious designs.
We get it. It's fucking Easter. If it's another Jesus sag,
I'm gonna fucking lose it.
Speaker 1 (25:17):
Nice try Biden think we wouldn't notice. Yeah, oh yeah,
actually it happened forty five years ago.
Speaker 2 (25:24):
Right exactly, and so everything's just all bad faith reads
on everything and then just be like I thought this
the president supposedly a Catholic. It's like, don't worry he is.
He's out loud being like I don't like abortion, right,
I only y'all that I'll say that out loud. I
don't care. Yeah, but you know I get it, like
times are changing, but hey, I'm still still big sea
(25:44):
Catholic poppy. Yeah, don't worry.
Speaker 1 (25:48):
I feel like Joe Biden really loves Easter, Like I
feel like that's a big, big holiday for him.
Speaker 2 (25:52):
Yeah. I feel like he seems like one of those
guys where it's like every Easter in my grandpa he
loves to eat the Dove truffle chocolate eggs. That's his
favorite thing is sit in his rocking chair and then
we bring us we bring our eggs to him, and
he'll open them and then eat our candy. And it's fun.
That's all he does. And then and then Grandma gets mad.
Yeah he must.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
Love it all right. Millions of AT and T customers
just have their personal info published on the dark web.
I got a nice email about this Easter morning. Thanks
a lot AT and T for ruining Easter.
Speaker 2 (26:26):
He has risen by he we mean, your social security
and locking information has risen up on the dark web.
Speaker 1 (26:33):
Reportedly, the personal data of seventy three million current or
former AT and T customers, including addresses, social security numbers,
and pass codes, was published on the dark web, which
is less than ideal for those of us who count
ourselves among the seventy three million. Oh proud current and
former eights.
Speaker 2 (26:53):
Hy one of the seventy three million. C That's why
I'm with T mobile, you know what I mean. They
know too many people who use T mobile to go
into collections, so they don't even bother trying to get
that information. But hey, hey man, it must must be hard.
But I mean, this just feels like every fucking three months,
I'm getting some letter like we're so sorry everything about
you has been leaked into a dark whip.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
It's like, it does almost feel like we should just
come up with a new way to keep track of
shit at this point, right, Like our social security numbers
are burnt, like burnt, I feel it. We're you know,
in the Mission Impossible where they're like we got to
catch get the data file before all of these IDs
get burnt. Well, we we exist in the world where
(27:40):
he accidentally peed a little bit on the guy while
he was hanging from the ceiling and they caught him. Yeah,
the knocklist exactly. We've all we're all on the knocklist,
and the knocklist has been burnt.
Speaker 2 (27:52):
Yeah, we're burned. Yeah, the spot has been burnt. Sorry,
we can't smoke weed here anymore.
Speaker 1 (27:56):
Like three hundred and thirty million people in the US
and they just sold seventy million of their personal informations
and socialist security numbers on the dark web. So it
feels like that's a significant enough chunk that it's not
enough to just be like and we've got you, Like
you get to know Norton anti virus very well because
(28:19):
they're your new friends.
Speaker 2 (28:20):
ATT is just on a run right now, man.
Speaker 1 (28:24):
I know it's been a little over a month since
the mass outage.
Speaker 2 (28:28):
Yeah, and now Sally, your blood type, birthday and social
security are out there on some knock list.
Speaker 1 (28:37):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (28:37):
Hey, change those passwords, man, change those passwords. I had
to figure that out, not the hard way, but I realized, like,
once you know, like browsers will be like if you
save your passwords in a browser, will be like, hey,
your passwords were found in an information leak, like following
ones you should change. I'm like, oh, they were all
the same word, like yeah, like password I had from
like the aol era, right, I was like NIS on
(29:00):
Pathfinder ninety seven.
Speaker 1 (29:02):
Yeah, that's utok.
Speaker 2 (29:04):
Don't try that. Don't try that. Don't no one try that.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
So do you do the like randomized ones like the
big long oh yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:10):
Hell yeah. When it's like hey, can we suggest a
fucking passwordy loser? Yeah, rather than like I like weed,
I'm like okay, I'll listen. It's like your and like yeah, yeah, yeah,
that's that seems solid.
Speaker 1 (29:23):
Yes, please that one?
Speaker 2 (29:24):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (29:25):
All right. Big news for Donald Trump, Like there's a
bunch of positive news stories I guess for Donald Trump's
like money problems over the weekend because truth Social I
guess went public last week and he's now valued at
like five billion dollars, Like he's a tech billionaire again,
(29:46):
or he's a billionaire again and a tech billionaire probably
for the first time. But it's just it's such a
weird story, Like they keep talking about how his partner
in this deal is like the owner of a shell company.
But that's just not that's not a bad term anymore.
They're just like, yeah, and he's like monetizing his political influence.
(30:08):
They're like, so all these people are gambling that he's
gonna like win the next presidential election.
Speaker 2 (30:13):
Someone someone, I forget who it was, maybe in the
New repolic they called it a trump and dump like
with this stock just to get up because like everyone's
like they they lost like over fifty million dollars last year.
This isn't like, this isn't a broth. This is a
fucking fire. This is a dump. Yeah fire, This.
Speaker 1 (30:32):
Isn't suffered a net loss of fifty eight million dollars
last year, brought in so like I was like, oh,
but so they must be advertising a bunch on truth Social.
I you know, try and spend as much time as
I can on truth Social, but that that amounts to
never having gone on it. And it brought in four
(30:54):
point one million dollars in revenue in twenty twenty three.
Speaker 2 (30:57):
Yeah, great, great, I love that. That sounds good. It's
like a good business. How on end, how much how
much of my money can I give you?
Speaker 1 (31:04):
Right?
Speaker 2 (31:04):
How many monies would you like.
Speaker 1 (31:06):
It's just like such an indictment of the whole like
Wall Street, you know, like the idea that there's any
any there there in the whole Wall Street world. Right,
it's you know, just valuations based on kind of nonsense.
Just growth, as we've talked about before in the tech world,
(31:28):
like that's all they.
Speaker 2 (31:29):
Care, Like the promise, you know, like when people like
look at Tesla and they're like, well, how much money
you like making? They're like, well, dude, think about like
what it can do though, Like what the potential. That's
what that's what you're that's what it is. Think about that.
Speaker 1 (31:40):
So their future like end game for this is he
gets elected president and then like that makes the network
grow and he's like just raking in advertising money and
like subscription money. I guess, yeah, well this feels so weird,
(32:00):
like the president would be monetizing the presidency.
Speaker 2 (32:03):
Yeah, but here we are. I mean, like it's really
just it's like real, all like traditional oligarch shit, right
because the guy that he's doing this COUMP. The merger
is with this investor billionaire named Jeff Yas. Yeah, yes,
we're the Yas queen headlines for this because it's right.
Therefore y queen's at because without him right, without him
(32:25):
being like the person to merge with the Donald Trump
media company, there's no billions of valuation added to or
billion dollars of valuation added to Trump's net worth. And
as like journalists are looking more into it, they're like, oh,
this is what the fuck is going on? This guy
Yas is an investor in TikTok. Yeah, And so when
(32:47):
Trump came out, there a lot of people being like, who,
who's this reversal benefiting? Because not just because Trump gives
a fuck, it's because he can monetize his opinion to
try and change the direction of the herd. And with
Yas being a donor of TikTok, they're like, got it,
So this is the tit for tat here You're gonna
reverse course and be like, no, no, TikTok is very good.
(33:09):
We love it, and I want all of my mega
faith ol to also believe that. And then you get
to get just basically get some get some cash injection
to fight your legal fees. It's all it's all right there, It's.
Speaker 1 (33:22):
All just right there in front of Yeah, I don't
know what like maybe my like I said, maybe I
maybe it's the hard reset I gave my brain with
one of those massage guns to the temple. But it
does like all these the past couple of weeks of
Trump stories, and particularly this one and the Bible Sales one,
are just like hitting me as like wait what like
(33:45):
oh yeah, Like it just feels like we've reached a
level of cynicism and like open oligarchy in this case
that is just kind of staggering.
Speaker 2 (33:57):
Well, yeah, the reporting on it is like, yeah, and
that's the guy he's working with. The guy usually said
he doesn't like Trump anyway, so that's why he has money.
Speaker 1 (34:05):
That's a smart Yeah, they're just like this guy's a
maverick and really smart. Like if he's doing this, it's
like fuck what.
Speaker 2 (34:12):
He's ducking accountability and these people are enabling it because
they know they can now buy influence over this guy,
like quite literally and just be like dude, I'm fucking
way too in on TikTok man. I can handle this
shit right now.
Speaker 1 (34:25):
Like all the there's just this rotten logic at the
core of the entire system that the mainstream media buys into,
with like Wall Street being the economy and corporations basically
having all the power to do whatever they want at
this point, and so the mainstream media, like, I feel
(34:48):
like this is a savvy move by Trump because he
just recognizes that, like it's taking advantage of the one
thing the mainstream media won't call out, which is just
like how blatantly and complempletely fucking corrupt like the whole
Wall Street system is. So they just have to be like, yeah,
I guess he's like got a lot of money now,
and that's.
Speaker 2 (35:08):
How you do it. I mean, that's one way to
do it. But yeah, anyway, yes, queen, then that's my
op ed for the Wall Street Journal.
Speaker 1 (35:16):
Yeah, the Wall Street Journal is really just like Donald
Trump had a big week. Oh wow, cool fuck cool.
All right, let's take a quick break and we'll come
back and talk about some more news stories. We'll be
right back.
Speaker 2 (35:41):
And we're back.
Speaker 1 (35:43):
And in a slightly related story to my underrated, people
can't stop stealing shit from Air Force one, particularly like
journalists who travel on Air Force one just can't stop
themselves from just like having grabbing some ship. And at
first I was like, oh, this is, you know, not
(36:06):
that huge a deal. This is just uh you know, sorry,
I just got we just got a news alert from Jabbari.
Speaker 2 (36:14):
I know Embiid is coming back, nearing a return expected.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
All right, second, I just saw Embiid's pictures, So make
sure that you're not like being traded, all right. So,
like at first, I was like, okay, they like grabbed
a pen or something, but no, they so NBC correspondent
Kelly O'Donnell is the president of the White House Correspondence
(36:39):
Association and sent an email out being like, did you
guys stop fucking taking ship off of Air Force one
Like looks it's a bad look for the media. And
one person was like, okay, here you go and returned
to an Air Force one embroidered pillow case.
Speaker 2 (37:01):
Like that.
Speaker 1 (37:02):
But oh, I didn't know. I wasn't supposed to do
too much.
Speaker 2 (37:06):
You took they they'll notice if a pillow case is gone,
take the fucking ship. Like take a fucking pen or
some shit, or a wine glass some other ship which
I didn't realize that's what people were taking too. Were
like the fucking wine glasses.
Speaker 1 (37:21):
Yeah, it's truly. I mean, wine glasses make sense given
what we previously discussed of like there being some filth
to it, like pillowcase got your presidential like head sweat.
Speaker 2 (37:37):
Well, can they get close to Joe Byron's pillow case?
I can't imagine.
Speaker 1 (37:42):
Probably not.
Speaker 2 (37:43):
There's probably like other beds, Like it's just other pillows.
Like every pillow on the plane has an embroidered pillowcase,
so you're just coming up on one of those.
Speaker 1 (37:51):
But I think that's the promise, right, that's when when
you're selling me the Air Force one embroidered pillow case,
the thing that's popping into my mind that made me
bit on it.
Speaker 2 (38:02):
You're like, I gotta smell it first, Yeah, exactly. Let me.
Speaker 1 (38:06):
Does it smell like where there's originals and like kind
of rotting vegetables.
Speaker 2 (38:11):
Like he's probably well do let me know?
Speaker 1 (38:14):
And yeah, yeah, baby powder. His scalp has to smell
like baby powder, right, who Joe Biden. Hmmm. It's just
it seems so dry.
Speaker 2 (38:25):
It sounds like a medicated.
Speaker 1 (38:27):
Sock, a medicated sock, and I.
Speaker 2 (38:30):
Don't know what that is, but it feels like a
sock that you put like mentholated cream or something into Yeah.
Speaker 1 (38:37):
Yeah yeah, mix vapor yeah yeah yeah, but like but
mixed with a foot Yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:42):
Like I feel like he just sprays the top of
his head with like lysol or something and calls it
a shower.
Speaker 1 (38:46):
A secret that everybody works at the White House knows
is that if you have if you're having some congestion issues,
you just smell Joe Biden's scalp and it clears your.
Speaker 2 (38:54):
Ship right outway.
Speaker 1 (38:55):
It's like a bowl of kimchi soup, you know, just
shit just clears right out. But yeah, I get I
respect it. I mean, it's clear that journalists aren't being
paid enough, but it's not it's actually not a good grind.
(39:16):
It seems like like people aren't paying them.
Speaker 2 (39:18):
Also, I'm sorry, I'm coming the fuck up if I'm
on Air Force one. I don't give a fuck what
Kelly O'Donnell has to say. How it makes us look
these this is my ship, Yeah, this is my tax
Oh you pay for this, Joe Biden. No, who did
the taxpayer? So guess what. I will take a blanket,
(39:39):
I will take the captain's hat. I will try and
dislodge the fucking you know, the control sticks or whatever
from the car. I'll do that. Shit. I don't care,
that's fine, that's mine.
Speaker 1 (39:49):
Yeah, uh, just take the whole frame of like the
lights and the little air thing that blows the air
on you.
Speaker 2 (39:57):
Oh yeah, yeah. I just like anything I can basically
get my grubby little fingers on to just pry off.
They're like, this guy's like dismantling his row, Like we
have to get him off the plane, and he keeps
proclaiming it's his shit. I don't know what. I don't
know what to do.
Speaker 1 (40:11):
I paid for this. Yeah, that floatation device, I mean
the seat cushion.
Speaker 2 (40:16):
True, that'd be so funny. You just pull the fuck
just you know how. Sometimes the seat cushion itself is
the flotation advice. It's like removable. You just rip that
shit off and you come. You just saunter off the
plane with that. You're like, Miles, I'm like what what? Yeah,
I'm like a problem. I'm late. My kid has a
fucking basketball game. I need to go to the fuck
out of my way.
Speaker 1 (40:37):
The White House's position is the journalists who want a
souvenir can get a package of eminem's decorated with the
presidential seal. No, but only sometimes don't want it.
Speaker 2 (40:47):
Sorry, I'm taking the seat cushion, seat belt. I'll cut
the seat belt. I'll bring, I'll get scissors, I'll clip
the seatbelt that's mine.
Speaker 1 (40:55):
That's my seat belt. Now, I'm sorry, I'm just wear
that as a belt now.
Speaker 2 (40:59):
I feel like every person should feel like that when
you're in the presence of the opulence of how our
government spends tax money. Yeah, you know what I mean.
You know how like people get. We talked about this too,
especially when like Trump's first administration, with people like Scott
Pruitt and people being like, I'm gonna I want all
this money to be like I want a new desk,
or i want this furniture I want to take I
(41:19):
want Deanon DeLuca candy. All the time, I'm like, if
that's how I was spending it, don't fucking look at
me wild when I go in there and be like,
I'm sorry, I'm taking this fucking respirator device from the
overhead part. I'm taking I'm taking it. I'm taking it.
I'm taking from them because for years they've been taking
from me.
Speaker 1 (41:38):
As Tupac says, this wish, this wish, this is my wish.
So I'm taking it back. I'm taking them all back.
You quote Tupaci quote goonies. Yes, that you can actually
buy one of the souvenir boxes of M and MS
from the George W. Bush administration for six ninety nine
(42:01):
on eBay. Right now, that's not making anybody money, man.
You got to come up with something better than this.
Speaker 2 (42:06):
Oh hell yeah, my fucking my my seat belt that
I'm clipping. You know that shit's gonna look right. I'll
do a nice I'll do nice images. Also the box,
I'm so sorry. This like doesn't feel like you were
on Air Force one. It looks like you bought like
it looks like a weird deck of cards.
Speaker 1 (42:23):
Yeah, it does. It looks like a George W. Bush
deck of cards like you would get at the Houston Airport, but.
Speaker 2 (42:31):
Not like the racist ones where they're like the Al
Qaeda's Most Wanted DECA cards. Yeah, people were buying like
in the fucking early odds.
Speaker 1 (42:39):
And this is just a Persian guy. Yeah, we're putting
on here for reason we ran out of al Qaeda guys.
Speaker 2 (42:47):
Sorry sorry, yeah, no, that that was uh, that was
Cousin Balk from that Age League TV show there. Sorry,
sorry to that man.
Speaker 1 (42:56):
All right. And finally, just a rundown of some of
the April Fools jokes on the Internet. So far. I mean,
it's always bad. So far, so bad, so far so bad.
This year feels especially dire. The biggest prank is Elon
Musk tweeting he was going to work for Disney and
make their content more woke, which I'm sure his. I'm
(43:21):
sure there is like an army's worth of people who
are like stand up and like salute and you know,
write five laughing crying Emji faces even though it didn't
even make them smile. But yeah, I mean, right now,
it's mostly like April Fool's Day on the internet is
(43:42):
just an excuse for brands to cobble together half hearted
jokes and bad photoshops in order to, you know, get
our attention as we're giving it to them right now.
Ikia Singapore had an ad campaign of invisible objects uh
spelled I n vsbl uh. I don't know sure.
Speaker 2 (44:06):
I saw seven eleven made Big Bite hot dog flavored
sparkling water.
Speaker 1 (44:13):
We covered it last week. Yeah you were out?
Speaker 2 (44:16):
Oh really?
Speaker 1 (44:17):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (44:17):
Yeah, none of it.
Speaker 1 (44:18):
Nothing's like good, no, no, it kind of sucks.
Speaker 2 (44:23):
Yeah. One is like a baby translator. App I saw
something like that or it's like aiming at your baby
and I'll tell you what it's like, no one cares.
I don't know what it is. I think is there
anything that would make you laugh at this point? Or
does it just feel like like April Fools has just
it doesn't fit with our with like the tone of
(44:44):
society like or what we're like everyone's on EDG. It's like, dude,
I don't give a fuck about fake hot dog sparkling water.
Just get the fuck like there's real shit going on,
Like please, yeah, give a fuck. If Elon is making
the linguini woke at Disney, as he said in that
stupid tweet.
Speaker 1 (45:01):
Excited to join at Disney as their chief DEI officer,
can't wait to work with Bob Iger and Kathleen Kennedy
to make their content more woke, even the linguinieh.
Speaker 2 (45:14):
What why is that? I don't know, dude, That's what
it's like. Who is this for anymore?
Speaker 1 (45:23):
Duncan announced on Instagram they're changing their name to Donuts.
Speaker 2 (45:28):
What just donuts? I don't know.
Speaker 1 (45:30):
It feels yeah, it just feels like people in a
boardroom like convincing themselves, just saying over and over, that's funny.
That's actually really funny.
Speaker 2 (45:41):
You know, because our company has a sense of humor.
We like to have fun, you know what I mean,
unless it's like providing better benefits to our workers. But like, so,
let's just do something funny, like fart cologne?
Speaker 1 (45:55):
Huhat did somebody do fart colone?
Speaker 2 (45:58):
I know, but that just feels like this the kind
of shit there's a sierrachet toothpaste. I don't give a fuck.
I don't know why. I'm like so, I don't know
why my response is like this. It's almost like maybe
it's like why you're like, hey, kids, do better with
your pranks. Yeah, it's like this ain't this is such
first draft foolery. Yeah, like really, fuck with my sense
(46:22):
of reality. Say, my fucking cat died, man, I need
to fucking feel something.
Speaker 1 (46:29):
All right. Finally, I just we're just keeping an eye
on this. We mentioned that there's a big a lot
of stuff happening in the run up to the solar
eclipse next week or is that later this.
Speaker 2 (46:43):
Week from today?
Speaker 1 (46:45):
A week from today. Yeah, it's like, you know, a
lot of tourism, a lot of people traveling to the
path of the solar eclipse, and like we we mentioned
in a previous one in a previous story, about this
that like Indianapolis's eclipse numbers, like the amount of people
(47:06):
they have visiting Indianapolis is like way higher than the
number of people they had visiting for the Super Bowl
when they had the Super Bowl there.
Speaker 2 (47:17):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (47:17):
Yeah, yeah, it's going to be absolutely like all of
these towns are going to be completely overrun, to the
point that the mayor of Niagara Falls, which National Geographics
suggested was one of the best places to see the eclipse,
just declared a state of emergency as a precautionary measure.
And like, this is this is a tourist trap. Like
(47:38):
I guess I wouldn't call it a tourist trap because
it is like a cool thing to see, but it's
a town that is based on drawing.
Speaker 2 (47:45):
Tourists that right right, buying over.
Speaker 1 (47:49):
Yeah, we're not going to be able to deal with
this shit.
Speaker 2 (47:52):
Yeah, I just good luck, good luck to these small
places that are going to have like seven millillion people
pull up looking directly into an eclipse with no protective eyewear,
because your hospitals will also be overflowing with people with
eye injuries. But I don't know, they're like, you know,
part of me is like, ah, man, that's gonna be
(48:13):
so cool, Like it's gonna be a state of emergency.
That's how many people want to be in the path
of totality. But then I'm like, oh no, that that
actually sounds like the worst way to do it. Like
I feel like the best way is if you could
find some random spot just to be there and like
not have to have like a bunch of people like
oh well the eclipse, the eclipse, like just to try and
experience it in a more I guess natural way. But
(48:34):
I don't know. I like hearing about like everybody is
like preparing, Like it's like all police officers and like
emergency career, like they're on alert to like make sure
everything is fine, like they're able to deal with the
amounts of people. It feels like this setting for a
great or terrible bank heist film.
Speaker 1 (48:52):
Like Miles, I love this pitch. This is an amazing idea.
Speaker 2 (48:57):
I know you're reading the notes, but it's this group
of bank croppers. Oh, they're planning a series of high
profile bank robberies, and but the thing that has that
they have in common is that all of these banks
and maybe a federal reserve they lie in the path
of totality of the eclipse, and because of that, the
municipality's law enforcement resources will be so strained that they
(49:19):
can take advantage of this moment and upscond with millions
of dollars.
Speaker 1 (49:23):
You have the timing down, you know, like thee because
you have to do it during the eclipse while everybody's
distracted and staring at the sun with like bad glasses.
Maybe you do maybe you switch out the glasses, like
a shipment of the glasses Ocean's eleven style to like
so that everybody's blinded after the eclipse, all.
Speaker 2 (49:41):
The innocent people and children who just wanted to see it.
Speaker 1 (49:43):
Sorry, sorry pal, Sorry, Yeah, maybe that would be too
mean for Ocean's eleven. So maybe they just like somehow
find a way to do it with the cops.
Speaker 2 (49:54):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, like the ones that like you're like,
oh yeah, we got a shipment of the you drop
these off to the chief, Like what's this. I'm like, oh, yeah,
these are some eclipse I protection. You know, I just
want to make sure everybody's safe out there during the eclipse.
Oh I didn't think about that. Things. Yeah, you's probably
just drm pretty quick to all your men and women
out there on the force.
Speaker 1 (50:13):
Want you to take a bite, we'll tell you, tell
you all about it. They also Niagara Falls has like
the next four days is rain and snow like that.
That's the thing that I feel like, would really like
having that many people show up and then there's no
like sky, no visibility of the sky would be And
(50:34):
that's gonna happen in one of these towns. It's not
gonna be sunny everywhere.
Speaker 2 (50:38):
Yeah, I didn't even think about that. And then like,
do you you can't ask for a refund to God?
Can you?
Speaker 1 (50:45):
Uh? You can? Yeah, actually you can. Oh, okay, Like
usually he's pretty good, pretty good about like getting back
to you at least.
Speaker 2 (50:51):
Monday partially cloudy, so we'll see.
Speaker 1 (50:54):
Yeah, yeah, total crapshoot. It does feel like people should
just be like, yeah, renting an ATV and just driving
into the desert, although that is terrible advice and I
should probably legally not say that.
Speaker 2 (51:08):
On someone's you know, undeveloped land.
Speaker 1 (51:12):
Private tourists should just like drive into the desert and an.
Speaker 2 (51:16):
RV, you know, and cook up some meth.
Speaker 1 (51:19):
Man there you go while you're at anyway. Yeah, but
it's it's gonna be a whole thing. It's like the
sort of thing the Internet loves, the timing of it,
the it's happening during the workday, right, so it's like
a distraction on a Monday. And then the possibility of
disaster is also there, I feel like, and the possibility
(51:42):
of a great bank heist film there also there.
Speaker 2 (51:45):
And I'll I'll say this, Jack, when when it happens
on Monday, I'm gonna go outside into a hard reset
looking straight into that thing for the whole time. Just
I just want to be able to go to sleep
at night, close my eyes and see the eclipse.
Speaker 1 (52:00):
So it stays see a white blob.
Speaker 2 (52:04):
Just don't do that unless you're me a trained professional.
Speaker 1 (52:10):
Second time we've had to give that advice to our listeners.
All right, those are some of the things that are
trending on this Monday, April first, Happy April Fool's Day.
I hope you're having a better interpersonal April Fool's Day
than Elon Musk. And the public pranks that are you know, cutting,
(52:33):
cracking everybody else, or.
Speaker 2 (52:35):
Be so radically honest with someone that they think it's
a prank. There you go, That's how I would lean
into it. You know what I mean, and not in
a way that's scathing, Like maybe just just reveal a
truth or an observation you have in a way that
maybe not.
Speaker 1 (52:50):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (52:50):
Look, I'm not a relationship expert, but I might try
that later. And if I'm single tomorrow you'll know why.
Speaker 1 (52:56):
All right, back tomorrow with a whole lest episode of
the show, and until then, be kind to each other,
be kind to yourselves, get the vaccine, don't do nothing
about white supremacy, and we will talk to you all tomorrow.
Speaker 2 (53:07):
Bye bye,
Hello the Internet, and welcome to this special week Trend edition.
I guess they're getting less special since we've been doing
it for about it close to a year now.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
But it's special in that it's a departure from the
norm of.
Speaker 1 (00:14):
Our departure, a little bit of a break from the norm.
To quote my favorite rapper, Uh is that Will Smith? Anyways,
I'm Jack O'Brien. That is Miles Gray. It is April
Fool's Day. Oh shit, wait, I am Miles Gray, and
I am hold on, I am my name Don Ronald
(00:42):
Donald brin Let me like.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
I am John DeSantis.
Speaker 1 (00:48):
Yeah, fucking got you, guys.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
It's a fucking joke.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
If you should have seen the fucking look on your
because yeah, I got scary. You kind of went away
there for a second.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
Yeah I know who you were. Yeah, it kind of
fucked me up.
Speaker 1 (01:06):
I can tell you're something came over your face. Yeah,
I was like, am I John Deceand who is? Anyways?
I mean we're we're going to get into it. It's
April Folds and the pranks are coming fast and thick,
especially in my household. Can tell by my household, I mean,
(01:29):
you know, we have the sign out front, and we
have one of the things you know that we have
on there is that in this house we believe that
Elon Musk is the funniest comedian.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
Oh my god, dude killing it today. Lock him up
for murder because he's killing it with the jokes. And
also maybe lock him up for murder.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
Yeah, just generally something there.
Speaker 2 (01:52):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
So we're going to get into the things that trended
over the weekend, the things that are trending right now.
But before we do that, we do like to get
to know each other a little bit better, Yes, by
telling you some things we think are underrated and overrated. Yeah,
you want to start, You want me to start?
Speaker 2 (02:12):
Yeah? Sure, Which what are we doing? Unders unders unders
for unders to say underrated just after seeing some posts
on the internet this last Easter Sunday, the servers and
kitchen staff on these holiday brunch days underrated because I
(02:32):
think in the past we talk a lot about like
during the holidays, especially Valentine's Day, that seems to be
the like the moment in the service industry that people
are like it's fucked up, Like it's high tension. There's
a lot of expectations and it bleeds over into But
I'm seeing just from like people's screeds about shitty easter
(02:53):
brunches that they've had that like come off as like
you sound like a fucking entitled prick actually does like you,
I had the worst fucking Easter brunch ever in memory,
it sounds like your server did. Yeah, no, and like
the ability and then like this whole thing, Like I
saw a couple I'll be honest, I saw three different
(03:13):
Instagram stories from people that like I'm not really friends with,
but you know, just like people like people you've interacted
with the past, so you follow them, and like they
were all versions of like the service was like awful,
although like it would always be like all these insults
to the kitchen staff, the white staff, and then it's like,
but the server was trying to be paid, like trying
to soften like the preceding nonsense that was being described
(03:37):
in the post, to try and soften that blow, right,
and again, I just like seeing how people are deciding
to even go public about how terrible their easter brunches.
I'm like, no, it's the people that have to fucking
deal with you and not like throw hot tea on
your head that they they are the true heroes truly
and so yeah, and I think it's just it's just
(03:58):
one of those things where all these days, like it's
like these moments where strained familial relationships and expectations just
inevitably spill over into how you interact with white staff.
For the people at the restaurant. Yeah, and you know,
I just think they got a string of them coming up.
We got Eastern Brunch, you got Mother's Day Brunch. That's
gonna be another one where people are gonna fucking freak out. So,
(04:19):
you know, A salute to.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
Them dads and grads.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
Yeah, yeah, I feel like I don't know, do people
lose it as much on I feel like people don't
give a shit about their dads enough to be like, yeah,
special for you dad, Like it's more mom that you're like,
no's gotta be right for my fucking mom. Leave dad
alone dead anyway, Yeah, I salute them because I've already
seen there's already posts like I like to go on
(04:43):
trip Advisor too, to look at just what the roundup
is for angry people. I just love reading like fucking
seething reviews of places because it's more just a look
into the person than like a river flection the restaurant
most of the time.
Speaker 1 (04:57):
Yeah, some of the wildest shit from people who think
that they're telling you helpful information about how bad their
dining experience was. And also I wonder, I do wonder
zaigang who works in you know, who's worked service industry
during these holidays. I'm curious if there is like a hierarchy,
(05:17):
like if Easter is worse because people are coming from
church and so they're like, well, I already did my
good shit for the week. I can treat this person.
Speaker 2 (05:30):
I already shouted out the resurrection. So I'm always find
a fucking scream at somebody.
Speaker 1 (05:35):
We're good here. Yeah, yeah, I don't know. Yeah, let
us know if you if you have a if you
have a ranking of like worst days, I feel.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
Like Mother's Day has to be there, Like you know
what I mean, Like is it's built around this parental
relationship and all the trauma that comes along with that.
And like in a day where you're pretending to depending
on your relationship with the mother, could be celebratory, could
be like passive, aggressive, could be like I have to
do this was my mom's in a fucking freak out
and then you know, I don't know, but tell us,
(06:05):
you tell us, you tell us.
Speaker 1 (06:08):
My underrated is celebrities bullshit, like the just the shit
they have laying around their house. Apparently there's a New
Yorker article about how the celebrity memorabilia market is booming,
like like rich people instead of putting a van Go
up on the wall, are putting like Kurt Cobaine's sweater
(06:30):
from the MTV Unplugged on their wall. And first of all,
I'm not here to say one way or another. I
can tell you which one I'd be more impressed with,
and it ain't the Van Go. But apparently the price
goes up the dirtier it is, like the Cobaine sweater
apparently has like I think what they described is like
(06:53):
a brown crust in one of the pockets that people
speculate is probably vomit given where he was at during
that performance.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
What he's vomiting in his pocket like a little kid.
Speaker 1 (07:04):
Yeah, just like a little quick vomit in the pocket.
We've all been there. But that raises the price, Like
the price goes down if the sweater or you know,
the piece of memorabilia has been washed or disinfected, right,
Like we want they're funk all over it, like we
want it to be filthy.
Speaker 2 (07:24):
You want their vomit in it.
Speaker 1 (07:26):
Yeah, like a jack off rag from Kirk Cobain would
be like the highest value thing that people could think of.
Speaker 2 (07:34):
Yeah, like a spunk sock of yeucking Kirk cobain is.
You know what's wild though, too? This sweater like it's
a cardigan. It's so nondescript that like I'm seeing people
replicate it like just to be like like the style,
and I feel like now it makes me want to
be like, you know what that sweater is? I got
here right right, that's a fucking unplugged fucking Nirvana. That's
(07:56):
Kirk sweater dude. Yeah, exactly. Don't mind the price, deg.
Speaker 1 (08:00):
But I think this this makes a lot of sense
for the same reason we've been like speculating, like with
the a lot of the experiences people were having around
Taylor Swift concerts being comparable to like religious experiences, right
and uh, you know, tracking the rise of a kind
of spiritual almost like quasi spiritual relationship to celebrity with
(08:26):
the fall of religion. And this this just feels like
almost a one to one, Like, I'm pretty sure the
Catholic Church has things that were I mean they have
like the mythical Kirk Cobaine sweater from their own plugged Yeah,
the Shroud of Turin. Yeah, like they had to invent
a thing like that's honestly, they would fuck with this
(08:49):
kind of logic. Yeah yeah, this was touched by you know,
John Paul the second.
Speaker 2 (08:57):
The thing is like even with the Shroud of Turin,
I'm like, I don't know if you existed. I know,
Kirk Colebain existed. I've seen that unplugged, So that has
fucking value to me. That could be any old fucking
shroud of anywhere, could be Stroud of Norwalk, California, falling.
Speaker 1 (09:10):
Yeah yeah, but yeah, I mean i know, like the
Catholic Church sells like metals blessed by the Pope, and
I'm sure those medals would go for way more if
they like promised that the Pope had you know, like
fallen asleep and drooled on it or whatever.
Speaker 2 (09:25):
Oh yeah, I mean, like think about how much people
were like paying for like a hotel bill that was
signed by like John John Lennon and Yoko when they
were like in that hotel forever, right, Yeah, people would
just be like that scrap from room service six figures instantly.
Speaker 1 (09:39):
Yeah, but it's like it's an it has an inverse
relationship to how I would feel about any other human. Like,
so if you said that you were selling the sheet
from that picture where there he's like naked and like
spooning her like kind of monk key style. Like if
(10:02):
you sold that sheet, I think people would be super
into it. Oh yeah, Like it would go for like
a million dollars if there's like Pubes on it, dude, Yeah,
if there's Pubes on it, even better. But like if
it was literally anybody else and you're checking into that
hotel room, like, it would be the worst thing that
you could possibly imagine.
Speaker 2 (10:23):
It's all context, baby, But.
Speaker 1 (10:25):
The article says the market kind of went up during
COVID because people were at home with money, and again
this like mainstream media thing of like people were on
a spending spree just you know during COVID once they
got that stimulus check, just like the media likes to
paint this version of us that like you get the
stimulus check and thenies just like people like passed out
(10:50):
in a pile of like half unboxed flat screen TVs.
But so they're attributing it to that like feeling nostalgic
and at home. And but I would add that they
were afraid of death now more than ever. And yes,
like that this gives you a connection to Like the
(11:10):
quotes throughout the article are people being like, this is
immortality right there, Like this touching this Eric clapt In
stratocaster that was gifted to him by right, you know,
George Harrison, this is the one.
Speaker 2 (11:24):
You put down when he saw Jimmy Hendrix play live
for the first time and rethought everything in terms of
guitar playing. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:31):
Yeah, it's just trying like connecting to immortality in some
way via Kirk Coban's dried vomiting her pocket.
Speaker 2 (11:39):
Also, way better stuff to collect than fucking Harlan Crow's
like Hitler crap.
Speaker 1 (11:44):
Right, you know what I mean?
Speaker 2 (11:45):
That's a room even if it's like niche, Like, no
one's gonna be like, oh, I don't know about all
this Kurt Cobain stuff, Like they'll be like, oh okay, dude,
that's fine. Was like you want to see a Nazi
t set?
Speaker 1 (11:56):
They did say they said that they study how disinfection
related to celebrity memorabilia and so with uh, like Kurt Cobain,
the dirtier the better. With Hitler, they were people were like, yeah,
could you run that through the wash real quick? Yeah,
(12:17):
like who we'd love to get.
Speaker 2 (12:19):
Kind of freaky, but I still want it.
Speaker 1 (12:21):
I still want it, which I'm a little surprised by.
Like I feel like the people who are into Nazi
ship like would be like, I like want whatever the
closest is to the experience of Hitler taking a ship
on my head, right, you know, because that is that
was how he related.
Speaker 2 (12:38):
I remember super producer Ana was saying, ask if we
watched The Gentleman The New Guy Richie.
Speaker 1 (12:43):
Yeah, been I watched the first two ups.
Speaker 2 (12:45):
Okay, well I won't spoil it, but there is someone
who's really into some Hitler ship and something very specific
that is a piece of Hitler memorabilia that's obviously fake
for the show, but it encapsulates literally what you're saying,
like to almost near a tea.
Speaker 1 (13:01):
Yeah. Well, Hitler was like that was his fetish and
like to the point that he like needed that in
order to get off. Was a woman shitting on his head.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
So oh oh, well this is a little bit different.
But oh okay, but it's it's let's just say it
is a physical remnant of Adolf Hitler. Oh god, that
someone's really into collecting in this show.
Speaker 1 (13:24):
All right, Uh, what's overrated, Miles?
Speaker 2 (13:27):
This overrated? The act of posting through it. This is
something that we see. It's a new phenomenon. Okay, so
it's something that has brought been brought through in the
social media age. And if you're not familiar with when
someone goes oh they're posting through it, it's when someone
is in the midst of some kind of scandal or
controversy drama and everyone knows about it, but they use
(13:50):
their social media to act as if nothing's going on,
you know, or it doesn't bother me, or I'm actually
this is actually really funny to me. That's actually why
I'm posting about it, like really leaning into it. And
there's a great example this Sunday with Sean P. Diddy
love trafficking Combs who posted this man is embroiled in
(14:14):
a pretty dark and seemingly wide reaching criminal controversy with trafficking.
I mean, like Department of Homeland Security is the one
that you got mixed up with not like yeah the cops,
you know what I mean, or like the DEA, or
like oh it his drugs, like homeland security, like the
new one they made up to terrorize like brown people
(14:35):
from the Middle East. That's now they're coming after What
what are you doing? P Diddy? So he posted a
picture of his like I think youngest daughter in easter clothes,
like this is my daughter Love the first of all,
the daughter's name is Love Sean Combs yikes es and
just like yeah, I guess he thought this would help
like reorient his sheet like sinking ship. But there's this
(14:58):
like weird power that I think fame this people think
they have that becomes like, you know, clear when they
do goofy shit like this, like they really think by
just going, well, I want to talk about how cute
my little baby daughter is and not that I'm in
the center of multiple scandals and potentially like one of
the most prolific predators in the music industry, Like that's
(15:19):
enough to change the discourse. And I'm like, sir, just
fucking vanish man, like don't fuck it, like whatever, I mean,
I don't know, like if you're revealing the world that
you think you operate in where you're truly like the
fucking lever polar of all that exists in your reality.
But in this instance, yep, make sure youah a good thing.
Those comments are off, Yeah, just post post through it,
(15:41):
but it's not. It's not doing what you think is doing.
Speaker 1 (15:44):
P Diddy. Yeah, it's like the Kevin Spacey Christmas videos.
Yeah let me be Frank videos, Yes, where he's like,
y'all still love this though. I know you're disgusted by
my some of my behaviors, but.
Speaker 2 (15:58):
Are disgusted by like me right personally. But how about
I remedy that by showing you me.
Speaker 1 (16:05):
Yeah no, but still the play the hits baby all right?
My overrated are the April Fools pranks my kids played
on me this morning. Shots fired just dog shit, you guys.
The signs saying kick me and poop on me and
pe on me all right, Hitler were uninspired. I could
(16:28):
feel you putting them on me. The magnetile obstacle course
that you laid out was perfectly visible before I got
to them. Also, you put toy sharks in the obstacle field.
I like sharks, So I'm not sure what what what
(16:48):
you're going for writing. You are are spelled a E
R nice try start or poop or pepe uninspired so
indecisive by the way, or maybe.
Speaker 2 (17:05):
At my fart or am my poo poop?
Speaker 1 (17:07):
Yeah, thank you, make up your mind. And then when
those stopped working, they just started shooting me in the
butt and penis with nerf guns yep, and hitting me
with foam swords like.
Speaker 2 (17:18):
Yeah, and that's the time honor tradition is shooting your
parents in the junk with some kind of projectile. Yeah,
I remember had the ball Zuka.
Speaker 1 (17:26):
It was funny. They just thought they were just like
immediately like yeah, it's it's a free for all today
because it's I don't know where where they got the
idea that they could just shoot me because it was
April Fool's Day, but that had been discussed prior to
this morning and we went to war.
Speaker 2 (17:45):
Wow, I just love a scathing post mortem on your
children's It's this.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
Is this work in comedy, you guys, Uh, this is
you need to step it up.
Speaker 2 (17:58):
You know, it's so funny disiguring the fuck out of me. Man.
I remember doing this kind of shit and getting a
response same response out of my dad. Is like you
ain't full of nobody with that, Like that's all you got.
I remember. I was so in my fucking bag about that.
I asked my mom the next time. I was like,
I'm gonna do something. Really, I'm gonna really get him
(18:20):
to believe something messed up. And I ran it. I
think I ran it by my mom. I was gonna
say that, like so when my dad like had this
cat for since I was before I was born, so
at the time when I was like six, this cat
was like sixteen or something, and I was like, I'm
gonna fucking tell my dad the cat's dead because I
(18:41):
was shamed so bad. Oh you think these these minuscule
attacks are enough to shit shift me and get me
to believe some shit? Try hard? And I was like
and as a kid, I'm like, okay, harder. I don't
have nuance, so I'll just go to extreme, like your
cat is dead, your foster parents have been killed, woofy
(19:02):
is dead. Like That's where my mind went because I
was like, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (19:05):
What the fucking dumb so did he did he buy it?
Did he bite?
Speaker 2 (19:09):
No? My mom was like the fish don't fuck It's like, no,
don't do that. Yeah, I was talked out of it.
I remember vividly being like this is the answer, and
I think it was like my mom, ly, my grandfather,
somebody be like, no, no, no, that ain't a fool, Like,
don't even do that, like just like put Ben Gay
in his underwear or something. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (19:28):
You may notice that I have clown makeup on, and Okay,
the one prank that I guess was pretty good is
they did tie my shoelaces together and then perfectly, uh
you know, measure the distance that I would fall, so
my head fell into a bucket that I couldn't get off.
(19:49):
And then when I pulled the bucket off, I did
have clown makeup all over my face. So I guess
that one. Well, he got me. Guys, but yeah, I
don't know. You need work would be my grade.
Speaker 2 (20:02):
See, kids, don't go don't go extreme on it, you
know what I mean. Just you know, I think I
think you should take your father's critiques as a sign
that they actually they got to him, and that's his
only defense. Now, No, they didn't get to me. It's fine. No,
your dad is posting through it. He's posting through it.
Your dad it's fine.
Speaker 1 (20:22):
Crying a little bit. Yeah, I'm poo poo at work.
Speaker 2 (20:30):
Bullshit, I'm John DeSantis. I don't know.
Speaker 1 (20:35):
All right, let's take a quick break and we'll come
back and talk about some news stories. We'll be right back.
And we're back. We are back, and we are back.
And Sunday, March thirty first, was Transgender Day of Visibility.
(21:00):
It was also, as you may have heard, the day
that Christians eat chocolate bunny rabbits to celebrate Easter, and
a ton of right wing people freaked out because they
claimed the White House issued a proclamation celebrating Transgender Day
of Visibility and people were like, that's Biden is attacking Easter.
(21:26):
Mike Johnson called the overlapping occasions abhorrant on Twitter, while
presumably like just barely keeping himself from jacking off to
porn and having a record of his jack off session
sent to his son.
Speaker 2 (21:43):
The Covenant Eyes man still fucking with the Covenant Eyes.
Speaker 1 (21:46):
Yeah, his his app that does that.
Speaker 2 (21:48):
Yeah. Yeah, But I mean, also, dude, every everybody had
the most bad faith takes. Christy Nome said Joe Biden
banned religious themed eggs at the White House. Easter egg
design contest for kids, and he announced that tomorrow's National
Transgender Visibility Day. Did he forget that tomorrow's Easter Resurrection Sunday?
That kind of sounds like a like a sporting event.
(22:11):
Joe Biden in his White House blah blah blah blah blah,
Newt Gingrich as President Biden literally out of touch with reality?
Literally literally out of touch with what? And how is
he touching reality?
Speaker 1 (22:23):
Literally? How would you literally be in touch with reality?
Speaker 2 (22:27):
Is it like that like that fresco that's in the
Sistine Chapel, like where God and Adam or like touching fingers.
Is that like the like in my mind, that's being
in touch with reality in a weird way, like touching God. Anyway,
I said, why would he take away Christian Christianity's holiest
day Easter and declared to be quote transgender Day of Visibility? Why?
I say we would be irritated whenever he did it,
(22:49):
but doing it on Easter is an obscene insult to
every Christian. Oh ah, interesting, because that's that's exactly what happened,
And that's exactly that That's exactly what happened.
Speaker 1 (23:01):
He day before he was like, oh, Tomorrow's Easter. Let
me do this thing that's gonna piss off Christians because
the whole world revolves around them, and we'll make it
in your face trans day of Visibility in your face Christians.
Oh wait, it's always been trans Visibility Day March thirty. First,
(23:25):
it doesn't change year to year. Unlike Easter, Easter falls
on different dates. I didn't realize it was like moon based, Yeah,
because the moon's phases determined Easter's date. Western Easter is
the first Sunday after the first full moon after the equinox,
while Eastern Easter is after Passover. That's I mean, that makes.
Speaker 2 (23:47):
More sense, right because the setting of the passion is
during Passover, right, you know what I mean? So, like
I remember Her Majesty was like, how come pass Over
in Eastern like Art just locked in at the same
time in the Bible, isn't that what's happening, like when
He's getting crucified, Like, wasn't the Last Supper like potentially
some kind of satyr maybe, But then then we had
(24:10):
I did this whole thing, and I looked into it,
I'm like, oh, it's like the Council of the Elves
of Trent made this proclamation in three thirty that Easter
shall be the first Sunday after the full moon, after
the equinox, and then I'm like, oh, okay, they.
Speaker 1 (24:27):
Just kind of witchy for Christianity to be like into
the phases of the moon.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
A lot of that stuff is they don't want to
talk about it.
Speaker 1 (24:35):
Yeah, a lot of druids, ye, und.
Speaker 2 (24:38):
Yeah, a lot of night elves working in there. But yeah, again,
like it's just so stupid to be like the heat
changed it. This is they fucking do this every time
there's a national day, the president, the Office of the
President says like, oh yeah, it's it's proclaimed that this
day is this day. That's been this day for over
a decade now. And then the other attack that people
have been going on is like and they banned religious designs.
(25:02):
That has been the fucking rules for forty five fucking
years or however long this thing has been happening across
really all administrations. It's like, dude, we don't need religious designs.
We get it. It's fucking Easter. If it's another Jesus sag,
I'm gonna fucking lose it.
Speaker 1 (25:17):
Nice try Biden think we wouldn't notice. Yeah, oh yeah,
actually it happened forty five years ago.
Speaker 2 (25:24):
Right exactly, and so everything's just all bad faith reads
on everything and then just be like I thought this
the president supposedly a Catholic. It's like, don't worry he is.
He's out loud being like I don't like abortion, right,
I only y'all that I'll say that out loud. I
don't care. Yeah, but you know I get it, like
times are changing, but hey, I'm still still big sea
(25:44):
Catholic poppy. Yeah, don't worry.
Speaker 1 (25:48):
I feel like Joe Biden really loves Easter, Like I
feel like that's a big, big holiday for him.
Speaker 2 (25:52):
Yeah. I feel like he seems like one of those
guys where it's like every Easter in my grandpa he
loves to eat the Dove truffle chocolate eggs. That's his
favorite thing is sit in his rocking chair and then
we bring us we bring our eggs to him, and
he'll open them and then eat our candy. And it's fun.
That's all he does. And then and then Grandma gets mad.
Yeah he must.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
Love it all right. Millions of AT and T customers
just have their personal info published on the dark web.
I got a nice email about this Easter morning. Thanks
a lot AT and T for ruining Easter.
Speaker 2 (26:26):
He has risen by he we mean, your social security
and locking information has risen up on the dark web.
Speaker 1 (26:33):
Reportedly, the personal data of seventy three million current or
former AT and T customers, including addresses, social security numbers,
and pass codes, was published on the dark web, which
is less than ideal for those of us who count
ourselves among the seventy three million. Oh proud current and
former eights.
Speaker 2 (26:53):
Hy one of the seventy three million. C That's why
I'm with T mobile, you know what I mean. They
know too many people who use T mobile to go
into collections, so they don't even bother trying to get
that information. But hey, hey man, it must must be hard.
But I mean, this just feels like every fucking three months,
I'm getting some letter like we're so sorry everything about
you has been leaked into a dark whip.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
It's like, it does almost feel like we should just
come up with a new way to keep track of
shit at this point, right, Like our social security numbers
are burnt, like burnt, I feel it. We're you know,
in the Mission Impossible where they're like we got to
catch get the data file before all of these IDs
get burnt. Well, we we exist in the world where
(27:40):
he accidentally peed a little bit on the guy while
he was hanging from the ceiling and they caught him. Yeah,
the knocklist exactly. We've all we're all on the knocklist,
and the knocklist has been burnt.
Speaker 2 (27:52):
Yeah, we're burned. Yeah, the spot has been burnt. Sorry,
we can't smoke weed here anymore.
Speaker 1 (27:56):
Like three hundred and thirty million people in the US
and they just sold seventy million of their personal informations
and socialist security numbers on the dark web. So it
feels like that's a significant enough chunk that it's not
enough to just be like and we've got you, Like
you get to know Norton anti virus very well because
(28:19):
they're your new friends.
Speaker 2 (28:20):
ATT is just on a run right now, man.
Speaker 1 (28:24):
I know it's been a little over a month since
the mass outage.
Speaker 2 (28:28):
Yeah, and now Sally, your blood type, birthday and social
security are out there on some knock list.
Speaker 1 (28:37):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (28:37):
Hey, change those passwords, man, change those passwords. I had
to figure that out, not the hard way, but I realized, like,
once you know, like browsers will be like if you
save your passwords in a browser, will be like, hey,
your passwords were found in an information leak, like following
ones you should change. I'm like, oh, they were all
the same word, like yeah, like password I had from
like the aol era, right, I was like NIS on
(29:00):
Pathfinder ninety seven.
Speaker 1 (29:02):
Yeah, that's utok.
Speaker 2 (29:04):
Don't try that. Don't try that. Don't no one try that.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
So do you do the like randomized ones like the
big long oh yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:10):
Hell yeah. When it's like hey, can we suggest a
fucking passwordy loser? Yeah, rather than like I like weed,
I'm like okay, I'll listen. It's like your and like yeah, yeah, yeah,
that's that seems solid.
Speaker 1 (29:23):
Yes, please that one?
Speaker 2 (29:24):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (29:25):
All right. Big news for Donald Trump, Like there's a
bunch of positive news stories I guess for Donald Trump's
like money problems over the weekend because truth Social I
guess went public last week and he's now valued at
like five billion dollars, Like he's a tech billionaire again,
(29:46):
or he's a billionaire again and a tech billionaire probably
for the first time. But it's just it's such a
weird story, Like they keep talking about how his partner
in this deal is like the owner of a shell company.
But that's just not that's not a bad term anymore.
They're just like, yeah, and he's like monetizing his political influence.
(30:08):
They're like, so all these people are gambling that he's
gonna like win the next presidential election.
Speaker 2 (30:13):
Someone someone, I forget who it was, maybe in the
New repolic they called it a trump and dump like
with this stock just to get up because like everyone's
like they they lost like over fifty million dollars last year.
This isn't like, this isn't a broth. This is a
fucking fire. This is a dump. Yeah fire, This.
Speaker 1 (30:32):
Isn't suffered a net loss of fifty eight million dollars
last year, brought in so like I was like, oh,
but so they must be advertising a bunch on truth Social.
I you know, try and spend as much time as
I can on truth Social, but that that amounts to
never having gone on it. And it brought in four
(30:54):
point one million dollars in revenue in twenty twenty three.
Speaker 2 (30:57):
Yeah, great, great, I love that. That sounds good. It's
like a good business. How on end, how much how
much of my money can I give you?
Speaker 1 (31:04):
Right?
Speaker 2 (31:04):
How many monies would you like.
Speaker 1 (31:06):
It's just like such an indictment of the whole like
Wall Street, you know, like the idea that there's any
any there there in the whole Wall Street world. Right,
it's you know, just valuations based on kind of nonsense.
Just growth, as we've talked about before in the tech world,
(31:28):
like that's all they.
Speaker 2 (31:29):
Care, Like the promise, you know, like when people like
look at Tesla and they're like, well, how much money
you like making? They're like, well, dude, think about like
what it can do though, Like what the potential. That's
what that's what you're that's what it is. Think about that.
Speaker 1 (31:40):
So their future like end game for this is he
gets elected president and then like that makes the network
grow and he's like just raking in advertising money and
like subscription money. I guess, yeah, well this feels so weird,
(32:00):
like the president would be monetizing the presidency.
Speaker 2 (32:03):
Yeah, but here we are. I mean, like it's really
just it's like real, all like traditional oligarch shit, right
because the guy that he's doing this COUMP. The merger
is with this investor billionaire named Jeff Yas. Yeah, yes,
we're the Yas queen headlines for this because it's right.
Therefore y queen's at because without him right, without him
(32:25):
being like the person to merge with the Donald Trump
media company, there's no billions of valuation added to or
billion dollars of valuation added to Trump's net worth. And
as like journalists are looking more into it, they're like, oh,
this is what the fuck is going on? This guy
Yas is an investor in TikTok. Yeah, And so when
(32:47):
Trump came out, there a lot of people being like, who,
who's this reversal benefiting? Because not just because Trump gives
a fuck, it's because he can monetize his opinion to
try and change the direction of the herd. And with
Yas being a donor of TikTok, they're like, got it,
So this is the tit for tat here You're gonna
reverse course and be like, no, no, TikTok is very good.
(33:09):
We love it, and I want all of my mega
faith ol to also believe that. And then you get
to get just basically get some get some cash injection
to fight your legal fees. It's all it's all right there, It's.
Speaker 1 (33:22):
All just right there in front of Yeah, I don't
know what like maybe my like I said, maybe I
maybe it's the hard reset I gave my brain with
one of those massage guns to the temple. But it
does like all these the past couple of weeks of
Trump stories, and particularly this one and the Bible Sales one,
are just like hitting me as like wait what like
(33:45):
oh yeah, Like it just feels like we've reached a
level of cynicism and like open oligarchy in this case
that is just kind of staggering.
Speaker 2 (33:57):
Well, yeah, the reporting on it is like, yeah, and
that's the guy he's working with. The guy usually said
he doesn't like Trump anyway, so that's why he has money.
Speaker 1 (34:05):
That's a smart Yeah, they're just like this guy's a
maverick and really smart. Like if he's doing this, it's
like fuck what.
Speaker 2 (34:12):
He's ducking accountability and these people are enabling it because
they know they can now buy influence over this guy,
like quite literally and just be like dude, I'm fucking
way too in on TikTok man. I can handle this
shit right now.
Speaker 1 (34:25):
Like all the there's just this rotten logic at the
core of the entire system that the mainstream media buys into,
with like Wall Street being the economy and corporations basically
having all the power to do whatever they want at
this point, and so the mainstream media, like, I feel
(34:48):
like this is a savvy move by Trump because he
just recognizes that, like it's taking advantage of the one
thing the mainstream media won't call out, which is just
like how blatantly and complempletely fucking corrupt like the whole
Wall Street system is. So they just have to be like, yeah,
I guess he's like got a lot of money now,
and that's.
Speaker 2 (35:08):
How you do it. I mean, that's one way to
do it. But yeah, anyway, yes, queen, then that's my
op ed for the Wall Street Journal.
Speaker 1 (35:16):
Yeah, the Wall Street Journal is really just like Donald
Trump had a big week. Oh wow, cool fuck cool.
All right, let's take a quick break and we'll come
back and talk about some more news stories. We'll be
right back.
Speaker 2 (35:41):
And we're back.
Speaker 1 (35:43):
And in a slightly related story to my underrated, people
can't stop stealing shit from Air Force one, particularly like
journalists who travel on Air Force one just can't stop
themselves from just like having grabbing some ship. And at
first I was like, oh, this is, you know, not
(36:06):
that huge a deal. This is just uh you know, sorry,
I just got we just got a news alert from Jabbari.
Speaker 2 (36:14):
I know Embiid is coming back, nearing a return expected.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
All right, second, I just saw Embiid's pictures, So make
sure that you're not like being traded, all right. So,
like at first, I was like, okay, they like grabbed
a pen or something, but no, they so NBC correspondent
Kelly O'Donnell is the president of the White House Correspondence
(36:39):
Association and sent an email out being like, did you
guys stop fucking taking ship off of Air Force one
Like looks it's a bad look for the media. And
one person was like, okay, here you go and returned
to an Air Force one embroidered pillow case.
Speaker 2 (37:01):
Like that.
Speaker 1 (37:02):
But oh, I didn't know. I wasn't supposed to do
too much.
Speaker 2 (37:06):
You took they they'll notice if a pillow case is gone,
take the fucking ship. Like take a fucking pen or
some shit, or a wine glass some other ship which
I didn't realize that's what people were taking too. Were
like the fucking wine glasses.
Speaker 1 (37:21):
Yeah, it's truly. I mean, wine glasses make sense given
what we previously discussed of like there being some filth
to it, like pillowcase got your presidential like head sweat.
Speaker 2 (37:37):
Well, can they get close to Joe Byron's pillow case?
I can't imagine.
Speaker 1 (37:42):
Probably not.
Speaker 2 (37:43):
There's probably like other beds, Like it's just other pillows.
Like every pillow on the plane has an embroidered pillowcase,
so you're just coming up on one of those.
Speaker 1 (37:51):
But I think that's the promise, right, that's when when
you're selling me the Air Force one embroidered pillow case,
the thing that's popping into my mind that made me
bit on it.
Speaker 2 (38:02):
You're like, I gotta smell it first, Yeah, exactly. Let me.
Speaker 1 (38:06):
Does it smell like where there's originals and like kind
of rotting vegetables.
Speaker 2 (38:11):
Like he's probably well do let me know?
Speaker 1 (38:14):
And yeah, yeah, baby powder. His scalp has to smell
like baby powder, right, who Joe Biden. Hmmm. It's just
it seems so dry.
Speaker 2 (38:25):
It sounds like a medicated.
Speaker 1 (38:27):
Sock, a medicated sock, and I.
Speaker 2 (38:30):
Don't know what that is, but it feels like a
sock that you put like mentholated cream or something into Yeah.
Speaker 1 (38:37):
Yeah yeah, mix vapor yeah yeah yeah, but like but
mixed with a foot Yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:42):
Like I feel like he just sprays the top of
his head with like lysol or something and calls it
a shower.
Speaker 1 (38:46):
A secret that everybody works at the White House knows
is that if you have if you're having some congestion issues,
you just smell Joe Biden's scalp and it clears your.
Speaker 2 (38:54):
Ship right outway.
Speaker 1 (38:55):
It's like a bowl of kimchi soup, you know, just
shit just clears right out. But yeah, I get I
respect it. I mean, it's clear that journalists aren't being
paid enough, but it's not it's actually not a good grind.
(39:16):
It seems like like people aren't paying them.
Speaker 2 (39:18):
Also, I'm sorry, I'm coming the fuck up if I'm
on Air Force one. I don't give a fuck what
Kelly O'Donnell has to say. How it makes us look
these this is my ship, Yeah, this is my tax
Oh you pay for this, Joe Biden. No, who did
the taxpayer? So guess what. I will take a blanket,
(39:39):
I will take the captain's hat. I will try and
dislodge the fucking you know, the control sticks or whatever
from the car. I'll do that. Shit. I don't care,
that's fine, that's mine.
Speaker 1 (39:49):
Yeah, uh, just take the whole frame of like the
lights and the little air thing that blows the air
on you.
Speaker 2 (39:57):
Oh yeah, yeah. I just like anything I can basically
get my grubby little fingers on to just pry off.
They're like, this guy's like dismantling his row, Like we
have to get him off the plane, and he keeps
proclaiming it's his shit. I don't know what. I don't
know what to do.
Speaker 1 (40:11):
I paid for this. Yeah, that floatation device, I mean
the seat cushion.
Speaker 2 (40:16):
True, that'd be so funny. You just pull the fuck
just you know how. Sometimes the seat cushion itself is
the flotation advice. It's like removable. You just rip that
shit off and you come. You just saunter off the
plane with that. You're like, Miles, I'm like what what? Yeah,
I'm like a problem. I'm late. My kid has a
fucking basketball game. I need to go to the fuck
out of my way.
Speaker 1 (40:37):
The White House's position is the journalists who want a
souvenir can get a package of eminem's decorated with the
presidential seal. No, but only sometimes don't want it.
Speaker 2 (40:47):
Sorry, I'm taking the seat cushion, seat belt. I'll cut
the seat belt. I'll bring, I'll get scissors, I'll clip
the seatbelt that's mine.
Speaker 1 (40:55):
That's my seat belt. Now, I'm sorry, I'm just wear
that as a belt now.
Speaker 2 (40:59):
I feel like every person should feel like that when
you're in the presence of the opulence of how our
government spends tax money. Yeah, you know what I mean.
You know how like people get. We talked about this too,
especially when like Trump's first administration, with people like Scott
Pruitt and people being like, I'm gonna I want all
this money to be like I want a new desk,
or i want this furniture I want to take I
(41:19):
want Deanon DeLuca candy. All the time, I'm like, if
that's how I was spending it, don't fucking look at
me wild when I go in there and be like,
I'm sorry, I'm taking this fucking respirator device from the
overhead part. I'm taking I'm taking it. I'm taking it.
I'm taking from them because for years they've been taking
from me.
Speaker 1 (41:38):
As Tupac says, this wish, this wish, this is my wish.
So I'm taking it back. I'm taking them all back.
You quote Tupaci quote goonies. Yes, that you can actually
buy one of the souvenir boxes of M and MS
from the George W. Bush administration for six ninety nine
(42:01):
on eBay. Right now, that's not making anybody money, man.
You got to come up with something better than this.
Speaker 2 (42:06):
Oh hell yeah, my fucking my my seat belt that
I'm clipping. You know that shit's gonna look right. I'll
do a nice I'll do nice images. Also the box,
I'm so sorry. This like doesn't feel like you were
on Air Force one. It looks like you bought like
it looks like a weird deck of cards.
Speaker 1 (42:23):
Yeah, it does. It looks like a George W. Bush
deck of cards like you would get at the Houston Airport, but.
Speaker 2 (42:31):
Not like the racist ones where they're like the Al
Qaeda's Most Wanted DECA cards. Yeah, people were buying like
in the fucking early odds.
Speaker 1 (42:39):
And this is just a Persian guy. Yeah, we're putting
on here for reason we ran out of al Qaeda guys.
Speaker 2 (42:47):
Sorry sorry, yeah, no, that that was uh, that was
Cousin Balk from that Age League TV show there. Sorry,
sorry to that man.
Speaker 1 (42:56):
All right. And finally, just a rundown of some of
the April Fools jokes on the Internet. So far. I mean,
it's always bad. So far, so bad, so far so bad.
This year feels especially dire. The biggest prank is Elon
Musk tweeting he was going to work for Disney and
make their content more woke, which I'm sure his. I'm
(43:21):
sure there is like an army's worth of people who
are like stand up and like salute and you know,
write five laughing crying Emji faces even though it didn't
even make them smile. But yeah, I mean, right now,
it's mostly like April Fool's Day on the internet is
(43:42):
just an excuse for brands to cobble together half hearted
jokes and bad photoshops in order to, you know, get
our attention as we're giving it to them right now.
Ikia Singapore had an ad campaign of invisible objects uh
spelled I n vsbl uh. I don't know sure.
Speaker 2 (44:06):
I saw seven eleven made Big Bite hot dog flavored
sparkling water.
Speaker 1 (44:13):
We covered it last week. Yeah you were out?
Speaker 2 (44:16):
Oh really?
Speaker 1 (44:17):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (44:17):
Yeah, none of it.
Speaker 1 (44:18):
Nothing's like good, no, no, it kind of sucks.
Speaker 2 (44:23):
Yeah. One is like a baby translator. App I saw
something like that or it's like aiming at your baby
and I'll tell you what it's like, no one cares.
I don't know what it is. I think is there
anything that would make you laugh at this point? Or
does it just feel like like April Fools has just
it doesn't fit with our with like the tone of
(44:44):
society like or what we're like everyone's on EDG. It's like, dude,
I don't give a fuck about fake hot dog sparkling water.
Just get the fuck like there's real shit going on,
Like please, yeah, give a fuck. If Elon is making
the linguini woke at Disney, as he said in that
stupid tweet.
Speaker 1 (45:01):
Excited to join at Disney as their chief DEI officer,
can't wait to work with Bob Iger and Kathleen Kennedy
to make their content more woke, even the linguinieh.
Speaker 2 (45:14):
What why is that? I don't know, dude, That's what
it's like. Who is this for anymore?
Speaker 1 (45:23):
Duncan announced on Instagram they're changing their name to Donuts.
Speaker 2 (45:28):
What just donuts? I don't know.
Speaker 1 (45:30):
It feels yeah, it just feels like people in a
boardroom like convincing themselves, just saying over and over, that's funny.
That's actually really funny.
Speaker 2 (45:41):
You know, because our company has a sense of humor.
We like to have fun, you know what I mean,
unless it's like providing better benefits to our workers. But like, so,
let's just do something funny, like fart cologne?
Speaker 1 (45:55):
Huhat did somebody do fart colone?
Speaker 2 (45:58):
I know, but that just feels like this the kind
of shit there's a sierrachet toothpaste. I don't give a fuck.
I don't know why. I'm like so, I don't know
why my response is like this. It's almost like maybe
it's like why you're like, hey, kids, do better with
your pranks. Yeah, it's like this ain't this is such
first draft foolery. Yeah, like really, fuck with my sense
(46:22):
of reality. Say, my fucking cat died, man, I need
to fucking feel something.
Speaker 1 (46:29):
All right. Finally, I just we're just keeping an eye
on this. We mentioned that there's a big a lot
of stuff happening in the run up to the solar
eclipse next week or is that later this.
Speaker 2 (46:43):
Week from today?
Speaker 1 (46:45):
A week from today. Yeah, it's like, you know, a
lot of tourism, a lot of people traveling to the
path of the solar eclipse, and like we we mentioned
in a previous one in a previous story, about this
that like Indianapolis's eclipse numbers, like the amount of people
(47:06):
they have visiting Indianapolis is like way higher than the
number of people they had visiting for the Super Bowl
when they had the Super Bowl there.
Speaker 2 (47:17):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (47:17):
Yeah, yeah, it's going to be absolutely like all of
these towns are going to be completely overrun, to the
point that the mayor of Niagara Falls, which National Geographics
suggested was one of the best places to see the eclipse,
just declared a state of emergency as a precautionary measure.
And like, this is this is a tourist trap. Like
(47:38):
I guess I wouldn't call it a tourist trap because
it is like a cool thing to see, but it's
a town that is based on drawing.
Speaker 2 (47:45):
Tourists that right right, buying over.
Speaker 1 (47:49):
Yeah, we're not going to be able to deal with
this shit.
Speaker 2 (47:52):
Yeah, I just good luck, good luck to these small
places that are going to have like seven millillion people
pull up looking directly into an eclipse with no protective eyewear,
because your hospitals will also be overflowing with people with
eye injuries. But I don't know, they're like, you know,
part of me is like, ah, man, that's gonna be
(48:13):
so cool, Like it's gonna be a state of emergency.
That's how many people want to be in the path
of totality. But then I'm like, oh no, that that
actually sounds like the worst way to do it. Like
I feel like the best way is if you could
find some random spot just to be there and like
not have to have like a bunch of people like
oh well the eclipse, the eclipse, like just to try and
experience it in a more I guess natural way. But
(48:34):
I don't know. I like hearing about like everybody is
like preparing, Like it's like all police officers and like
emergency career, like they're on alert to like make sure
everything is fine, like they're able to deal with the
amounts of people. It feels like this setting for a
great or terrible bank heist film.
Speaker 1 (48:52):
Like Miles, I love this pitch. This is an amazing idea.
Speaker 2 (48:57):
I know you're reading the notes, but it's this group
of bank croppers. Oh, they're planning a series of high
profile bank robberies, and but the thing that has that
they have in common is that all of these banks
and maybe a federal reserve they lie in the path
of totality of the eclipse, and because of that, the
municipality's law enforcement resources will be so strained that they
(49:19):
can take advantage of this moment and upscond with millions
of dollars.
Speaker 1 (49:23):
You have the timing down, you know, like thee because
you have to do it during the eclipse while everybody's
distracted and staring at the sun with like bad glasses.
Maybe you do maybe you switch out the glasses, like
a shipment of the glasses Ocean's eleven style to like
so that everybody's blinded after the eclipse, all.
Speaker 2 (49:41):
The innocent people and children who just wanted to see it.
Speaker 1 (49:43):
Sorry, sorry pal, Sorry, Yeah, maybe that would be too
mean for Ocean's eleven. So maybe they just like somehow
find a way to do it with the cops.
Speaker 2 (49:54):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, like the ones that like you're like,
oh yeah, we got a shipment of the you drop
these off to the chief, Like what's this. I'm like, oh, yeah,
these are some eclipse I protection. You know, I just
want to make sure everybody's safe out there during the eclipse.
Oh I didn't think about that. Things. Yeah, you's probably
just drm pretty quick to all your men and women
out there on the force.
Speaker 1 (50:13):
Want you to take a bite, we'll tell you, tell
you all about it. They also Niagara Falls has like
the next four days is rain and snow like that.
That's the thing that I feel like, would really like
having that many people show up and then there's no
like sky, no visibility of the sky would be And
(50:34):
that's gonna happen in one of these towns. It's not
gonna be sunny everywhere.
Speaker 2 (50:38):
Yeah, I didn't even think about that. And then like,
do you you can't ask for a refund to God?
Can you?
Speaker 1 (50:45):
Uh? You can? Yeah, actually you can. Oh, okay, Like
usually he's pretty good, pretty good about like getting back
to you at least.
Speaker 2 (50:51):
Monday partially cloudy, so we'll see.
Speaker 1 (50:54):
Yeah, yeah, total crapshoot. It does feel like people should
just be like, yeah, renting an ATV and just driving
into the desert, although that is terrible advice and I
should probably legally not say that.
Speaker 2 (51:08):
On someone's you know, undeveloped land.
Speaker 1 (51:12):
Private tourists should just like drive into the desert and an.
Speaker 2 (51:16):
RV, you know, and cook up some meth.
Speaker 1 (51:19):
Man there you go while you're at anyway. Yeah, but
it's it's gonna be a whole thing. It's like the
sort of thing the Internet loves, the timing of it,
the it's happening during the workday, right, so it's like
a distraction on a Monday. And then the possibility of
disaster is also there, I feel like, and the possibility
(51:42):
of a great bank heist film there also there.
Speaker 2 (51:45):
And I'll I'll say this, Jack, when when it happens
on Monday, I'm gonna go outside into a hard reset
looking straight into that thing for the whole time. Just
I just want to be able to go to sleep
at night, close my eyes and see the eclipse.
Speaker 1 (52:00):
So it stays see a white blob.
Speaker 2 (52:04):
Just don't do that unless you're me a trained professional.
Speaker 1 (52:10):
Second time we've had to give that advice to our listeners.
All right, those are some of the things that are
trending on this Monday, April first, Happy April Fool's Day.
I hope you're having a better interpersonal April Fool's Day
than Elon Musk. And the public pranks that are you know, cutting,
(52:33):
cracking everybody else, or.
Speaker 2 (52:35):
Be so radically honest with someone that they think it's
a prank. There you go, That's how I would lean
into it. You know what I mean, and not in
a way that's scathing, Like maybe just just reveal a
truth or an observation you have in a way that
maybe not.
Speaker 1 (52:50):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (52:50):
Look, I'm not a relationship expert, but I might try
that later. And if I'm single tomorrow you'll know why.
Speaker 1 (52:56):
All right, back tomorrow with a whole lest episode of
the show, and until then, be kind to each other,
be kind to yourselves, get the vaccine, don't do nothing
about white supremacy, and we will talk to you all tomorrow.
Speaker 2 (53:07):
Bye bye,
The Daily Zeitgeist News
Hosts And Creators
Jack O'Brien
Miles Gray
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