April 11, 2024 • 34 mins
Have you ever experienced a moment so profound that it shifted the very core of your being? That's the power of surrender, the key to unlocking the limitless potential of your life.
"Surrender is when you stop trying to force life of how you think it should be, so you can take the limitations off life".
-Kute Blackson
In this captivating episode, I sit down with best selling author and transformational teacher Kute Blackson, whose journey from miraculous healings in London to profound revelations on the Camino de Santiago will leave you utterly mesmerized. Across continents and cultures, Kute shares his insights into the transformative nature of surrender and the unwavering pursuit of authenticity and how you can approach your own personal journey.
When Kute moved to America, he thought he had a plan, but life had other ideas. This led him down a path filled with unexpected mentors and pivotal moments of surrender that reshaped his destiny. Through Kute's experiences, you will uncover the layers of what it means to let go and trust in your own higher intelligence. He shares the essence of his wisdom, transforming the way you look at the challenges you may be facing so you can see them as opportunities. His story is a testament to the magic that happens when you stop trying to control every outcome and instead, allow your soul's purpose to unfold.
Join us for this eye-opening exploration of surrender and purpose, and discover the courage to live your own truth.
Kute's Contact
- Website : www.kuteblackson.com
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kuteblackson/
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kute-blackson-35755519/
- Twitter: https://twitter.com/kuteblackson
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kuteblacksonlovenow
- YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/kuteblackson09
- Kute’s life changing experience in Bali: https://www.boundlessblissbali.com
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
In this episode I'm speaking to transformational
teacher and best-selling author,coot Blackson.
Coot's appeared across manydifferent TV shows across the
USA and he's here on this showsharing with us the magic of
surrender.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Surrender is when you stop trying to force and
manipulate life to fit yourlimited idea of how you think it
should be and what you think itshould look like, so that you
can take the limitations off oflife.
Speaker 1 (00:35):
Hello and welcome to the James Granstrom podcast
Super Soul Model series, where Ihelp people tune and tap in to
their natural state ofwell-being.
This week's guest is a belovedinspirational speaker and
transformational teacher.
He's the author of best-sellingbooks you Are the One and the
Magic of Surrender.
He's widely considered the nextgenerational leader in personal
(00:55):
development and his mission isto awaken, inspire and help
people on their mission to liveauthentically.
He's been featured on so manyTV shows, but what I like to
call him is our very own supersoul model this week.
So welcome to the show.
Coop Blackson, Thanks forhaving me.
Absolute joy to have you.
So, Coop, tell us a little bitabout your story, because you're
helping thousands uponthousands of people change and
(01:19):
transform their lives.
You've written these two booksyou Are the One and the Magic of
Surrender.
What brought you to this place?
I?
Speaker 2 (01:26):
was born in Ghana, west Africa, my father's from
Ghana, my mother's Japanese.
I grew up in London.
So for me I've always, you know, as a young boy, there was
always a question for me interms of okay, where am I from?
And I didn't feel like I wasfrom Ghana, I didn't feel like I
was from the UK, I didn't feellike I was Japanese, I felt like
(01:47):
I was from everywhere andnowhere.
And so that, I think, inspireda deep questioning from a very
young age who am I?
And so that, I think, was thefirst question that drove me on
the spiritual path.
And as a young boy, my firstmemories were kind of
interesting.
My first memories as a youngboy, my first memories were kind
of interesting.
My first memories as a youngboy, I remember seeing a
(02:09):
crippled woman crawling on thefloor and she picks up the sand
that this man walked on, wipedit on her face and stood up.
And so, week after week, I grewup seeing blind people see and
deaf people hear, and peoplestand up out of wheelchairs.
Speaker 1 (02:23):
What country were you in at this stage?
By the way, this was in the UK,in the UK.
And what part of the UK did yougrow up?
Speaker 2 (02:29):
in South London.
I grew up in Clapham, Brixton,Wandsworth, and then Fenton.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
I know that area because that's where I've lived
for like 20 years at some point.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
Yeah, yeah.
And so for me, my childhood wasa bit unusual because I grew up
around these miracles, but Ididn't think anything of it.
I didn't think anything unusualof it because it's all I knew.
You know, the same man whosesand this woman picked up would
look at a woman in a wheelchairand say, hey, why are you in
this wheelchair?
Stand up.
And he would touch them andthey would stand up and they
(02:57):
would start walking.
People would come in withwalking crutches and the same
man would look at this personwith crutches and say, throw
your crutches away.
This man was my father.
He built 300 churches in Ghana,west Africa, huge, hundreds of
thousands of followers.
A huge church in London at hisheight in the 80s I don't know
if you know the the Wandsworth,right next to Wandsworth Town
(03:17):
Hall, was a bingo hall and itwas a huge bingo hall on
Wandsworth High Street.
And so we took over the bingohall and four to 5,000 people
every, literally every Sunday,and he built a huge church.
My father was like a considereda miracle man of Africa, a very
mystical, spiritual,enlightened type of figure, and
(03:38):
so that's how I grew up, and soat age eight, I began speaking
in my father's churches when Iwas 14.
Speaker 1 (03:44):
Did he get you up there?
Did he say, off, you go, son,get up there and say something.
How did it happen?
Speaker 2 (03:50):
It wasn't even like that, it was more like at eight
years old I was more interestedin playing soccer Cool.
Speaker 1 (03:55):
You were a child right, you were a kid.
You wouldn't have much.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
I was more interested in being naughty, and so they
didn't think that was a goodidea.
They literally cornered me, putme on the front row of the
church and I would just fallasleep, and one Sunday they just
literally threw me on stage andthey said my dad said speak,
and that began my speaking, andI don't really know what
happened other than wordsstarted to come out of my mouth.
(04:20):
I don't really remember whathappened, other than things
started to emerge.
It was like I was channeling,and that began my relationship
to a deeper connection withsomething, an intelligence,
consciousness, the divine, theuniverse that I was really not
able to quantify or explain.
But from age eight, that also,you could say, started my
(04:42):
spiritual path in a veryintentional way, because that's
when I really began questioning,like, who am I, why am I here,
what's the purpose of life, whatthe hell is happening to me?
And so I would sneak into myfather's office and he had
literally a thousand books onhis bookshelf and I would start.
I started reading his books.
I started devouring these books, everyone from the Eastern
mystics, people likeKrishnamurti and Osho and Ramana
(05:04):
Maharishi, to Wayne Dyer,deepak Chopra, marianne
Williamson, you know, louise Hay.
And so from eight to 18, Iprobably read 800 books in the
sort of realm and field ofpersonal development, self-help,
spirituality, psychology, andthat began.
That began my journey.
But when I was 14, it was a verypivotal moment in my life.
(05:29):
And when I was 14, I wasactually ordained as a minister
and my father announced to thecongregation one Sunday my son
is taking over, he's mysuccessor.
Everybody was happy but me, andmy entire life was basically
carved out and planned out andset out for me by everyone else,
except you, yep.
(05:50):
And I was too afraid to speakmy truth.
I was too afraid to tell myfather how I felt.
I think, like many of us, weallow fear to hijack us.
We allow fear to limit our fullexpression and our authenticity
and our voice.
My fear was if I dare to speakmy truth, then I'm going to be
(06:12):
outcast.
If I dare to speak my truth,I'm going to lose my father's
love.
If I dare to speak my truth,then I'm going to be alone.
And so I said nothing for fouryears and it took me four years
to really go through a deepinternal introspection and
questioning and grieving andletting go, because by the time
I turned 17 and a half 18,.
I had to make a choice, as youknow, finishing A-levels, going
(06:35):
to university.
I projected into my future andI had to make some decisions.
I chose not to go to universityand I looked into my future.
I saw that I could follow theexpected path for my life.
I could take over my father'sorganization.
And as I projected to age 20,age 30, age 40, age 50, age 60,
as I projected into my future, Isaw that even if I became
(06:58):
successful by the worldstandards, by my father's
standards, if I don't havemyself, if I don't have my truth
, if I don't have my soul, myown integrity, what kind of
success is that?
And I felt my soul calling meto come to America.
And I think sometimes what yoursoul guides you to do doesn't
(07:18):
always make sense.
It never makes sense.
Q.
It never makes sense.
Speaker 1 (07:22):
That's how I found myself in Spain.
I never planned on coming here.
My parents immigrated here andI looked after my, my family
when they weren't well and whenmy father made his transition, I
decided that I still feel likethis place is calling me to stay
, and going back to Londondidn't feel right.
So, very much like anybody onthis mission, when they're
(07:45):
starting to get that soul call,as I like to call it, you know
the universe is ringing.
Are you going to listen?
Are you going to pick it up andsay what's your truth, what's
your authenticity?
Does this feel right to you?
Yes, I love the way MatthewMcConaughey says it.
It says you've either got soulcredits or soul debits, and when
you don't speak your truth,it's like you're only putting
(08:06):
soul debits out there.
And you know it just sounds tome that that trip taking moving
to America for you was just likeyeah, please bank, I want to
bank that soul bank, that soulof mine.
So you followed the path to theStates and what happened?
Speaker 2 (08:22):
Well, I had to have a conversation with my father.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
And how did that conversation go?
Well, I had to have aconversation with my father, and
how did that conversation go.
Speaker 2 (08:26):
Well, when I really chose to, I really feel as
though, when you listen to yoursoul, you'll always end up in
the right place in the righttime, doing the right thing with
the right people, even thoughthe route that you take may not
be the one that you most expect.
And so I realized I had to havethis conversation and face my
fears and cut a long story short.
I had the conversation at 18.
(08:47):
We didn't speak for two years.
After that cut an even longerstory short, which we can get
into, but I ended up winning agreen card in the green card
lottery and that's what enabledme 55,000 people basically win a
green card in the green cardlottery out of millions of
applicants and I won.
(09:08):
And that was, for me,confirmation that I was on the
right path.
And that's when I really feltthe support of life, the support
of the universe.
And so, as an 18 year old kid,with $1,000, maybe actually $800
in my pocket no, no one in theus two suitcases and a green
card uh showed up in in losangeles and went and found
(09:31):
mentors and teachers and many ofthe authors I'd read about,
studied with some of them,learned from some of them.
Speaker 1 (09:36):
yeah and, uh, that's what brought me to, to america I
have to say I love your storybecause I I can resonate with
your story because I've wonstuff so many times and I'm like
, wow, how this comes about.
I call this the green lights oflife.
I'm always sort of talkingabout it on this podcast the
green lights and how to tune in.
(09:57):
So you keep receiving thesegreen lights by keep following
your soul, by keep followingwhat feels right for you.
So anyone who's listening inlike what you're saying is it
sounds like almost miraculous,it sounds magical, but actually
it's just following what feelsright for you, and what's right
for you might not be right forsomeone else.
So that's a really bold move ofyou.
(10:20):
But it's nice to have thatfoundation behind you to get
that green card.
So that gives you a bit ofhumor and a bit of life going.
I'm lucky, I'm supported, I'mblessed, I'm worthy and if I
follow this, more good stuff'sgot to happen.
So okay, so you got the greencard.
Then what happened?
Speaker 2 (10:39):
Yeah, I mean I got the green card.
I came to America following mysoul.
I mean I got the green card, Icame to America following my
soul.
So much happened for me.
I went and found many of thementors and the teachers and
authors I'd studied with, andthen again, it's a long story so
we can dissect it in differentways, but, in a nutshell, I
(10:59):
reached a point in my journeywhere I felt as though things
weren't working.
I reached a point in my journeywhere I felt as though things
weren't working.
I reached a point in my journeywhere I felt as though I
reached a dead end.
I reached a point in my journeywhere I felt like I had, I had
reached the end of my own ego'scapacity to manifest my life and
I kind of gave up.
When I say gave up, Isurrendered, and in that that
(11:21):
led me to travel.
I was tired of reading thebooks, I was tired of studying
other teachers, I was tired ofreading Deepak and Tony Robbins
and Zig Ziglar and Mark VictorHansen.
I wanted to know truth formyself, and so that's what took
me to walk the Camino innorthern Spain.
I said, basically said a prayerone day, when everything fell
apart, broke up with mygirlfriend, a TV project that I
(11:44):
was pursuing at a young age kindof fell apart and I said to the
universe like I don't know what, what to do with my life
anymore.
I don't know what I'm supposedlike, I have no idea, I
surrender.
And I was guided to walk theCamino.
The Camino is a 900 kilometertrek in northern Spain, and so
(12:07):
it's a walk.
It's a spiritual walk thatpeople like Dante and Chaucer
and Francis of Assisi have done.
It's on an energetic vortexline, a very powerful walk.
And so I did this walk and thattook me to Spain, which then
took me to Thailand, which thentook me to Israel, which then
took me to India.
And I spent about four monthsin India, and for me it was my
time in India where I hadcertain awakenings and a deeper
(12:30):
experience of my true nature andmy purpose and why I was on the
planet.
And that's what brought me backto America again and with a new
vision 20-some years ago tocoach people and guide people.
This is before coaching was apopular thing, this is before
social media, and I started justfrom a sincere desire to help
(12:52):
people, coaching peopleone-on-one, no idea what I was
doing, but soon started todevelop my own way of working
with people.
That really transformed livesand before I knew it, people
were flying from around theworld to work with me one-on-one
, and that just evolved intosmall groups and large groups
and larger events and seminarsand two best-selling books.
So that's the short version.
Speaker 1 (13:12):
I think that what's really relatable for people is
just that you know, some peopleare at crossroads, some people
just don't know what to do.
You can read a lot of personaldevelopment.
You can read a lot of spiritualbooks.
I know I've read literallythousands.
I've devoured everything in thelast 20-odd years.
You know I've been on my wakeup since the year 2000 at least,
and after a couple ofnear-death experiences you start
(13:37):
to ask a couple of questions.
There's got to be a little bitmore to life than just what
meets the eye For someonelistening in.
You know, I think you knowparticularly what I like about
your book, the Magic ofSurrender.
I think that this is a reallyimportant part and I like to
come back to this surrender overand over again and I would like
(13:57):
to really talk about surrendera little bit.
Let's do it Because I thinkthat this is really helpful,
because it's like a letting gotime and time again of things
that you know.
Sometimes you try to controleverything, but there's a bigger
picture or a bigger handhelping you.
Very much like that hand thatgave you the green card saying
this is the right way, this isthe right way Come.
(14:18):
Much like that hand that gaveyou the green card saying this
is the right way.
This is the right way.
Come this way, come this way,come this way.
So if someone's having achallenge right now and
everybody somewhere is havingsome type of challenge, how
could they surrender into that,to a greater power, to tap into
their inner guidance, to tapinto the universe, tap into life
itself?
What practical thing could theyapply?
Speaker 2 (14:37):
We have to set a context for what we mean by
surrender, because I think whenwe just say surrender, for a lot
of people they'll have theirown interpretation or
connotation of what surrendermeans.
And if, without a certainframework, we're having 50
different conversations?
Because I think many timesthere's so many misconceptions
(15:00):
about surrender, this idea thatsurrender is weak or giving up
or waving the white flag, orthat if I surrender I'm going to
be a doormat or taken advantageof, or it just means sitting
there and doing nothing and justwatching television, or the
(15:21):
universe is going to bringeverything to me, or if I
surrender, I won't manifest mygoals, dreams and desires, if I
surrender I'm going to get lessin life.
And I'm actually saying no.
If you really understand thetrue meaning and the true
essence of what surrender is,what if you didn't get less in
life?
But what if you actually gotmore?
More than you could haveplanned, more than you could
have imagined, more than youcould have intended, with the
limitation of your consciousmind?
(15:42):
And so when we say surrender atleast when I say surrender, I
mean it is a letting go ofcontrol, or I should say the
illusion that you were even incontrol in the first place.
To me, control is the masteraddiction.
Surrender is when you stoptrying to force and manipulate
life to fit your limited idea ofhow you think it should be and
(16:06):
what you think it should looklike, so that you can take the
limitations off of life and beopen and be available to
allowing life to show you,allowing life in its
intelligence to reveal itself toyou.
And I think many of us, if welook at the best things, if we
really look at the best thingsin life that have happened to us
(16:27):
, the really best things, mostof it we didn't plan, most of it
we didn't sit there and sketchout every detail.
A lot of it just kind ofhappened in the process of
living life itself.
And so surrender is a lettinggo.
It's when you take thelimitations off of life and
you're available and you're openand you're receptive.
And I think that's where themagic is.
(16:48):
If you look at the really greatones a Jesus, a Buddha, a Gandhi
, a Mother Teresa, a Mandela,jesus, a Buddha, a Gandhi, a
Mother Teresa, a Mandela, martinLuther King, a Bruce Lee, a
Muhammad Ali at some point theyall surrendered, they all let go
of their idea of who theythought they should be.
(17:09):
They all let go and maybesometimes life fell apart.
Maybe Mandela went to prisonfor 27 years, which seemed like
the worst thing.
But many times, if you thinkabout what if he didn't go to
prison?
What if he didn't go throughthat experience?
What if shit didn't hit the fanand life didn't fall apart,
would he have ended up?
Would they have ended up howthey ended up, or would the
(17:29):
story have been very different?
And so often, when we go throughthese seemingly challenging,
difficult, dark nights of thesoul, negative experiences,
things not working out, it seemslike the worst thing from the
perspective of our mind, fromthe perspective of our
personality and ego seems likethe worst thing.
But often from our limitedperspective, we're not able to
see the entire picture.
(17:50):
And sometimes things need tofall apart to make room for the
next level, to make room for thenew opportunity, to make room
for the new blessing, to makeroom for the right partner and
the right soulmate.
And so I think that surrenderis the most powerful thing that
we can do.
If you look at the great ones,they all surrendered and in that
surrender they transcendedtheir human limitations and I
(18:16):
think they were able to tap intoanother dimension of life, and
that's when life was able tomanifest through them, life was
able to create through them,life was able to use them in
ways that they couldn't haveimagined.
So, if you look at the oldparadigm, which is more about
what I call the ego-based modelfor creating life, paradigm,
(18:37):
which is more about what I callthe ego-based model for creating
life, which is control, whichis more about know what you want
, get clear on what you want andgo make it happen, and I think
there is a level of that seemslike a Newtonian essence.
Speaker 1 (18:48):
Right, that's a Newtonian version.
Speaker 2 (18:50):
If you look at so much of self-help, it's all like
get clear on what you want,know what you want, set your
goals, go, make, go.
Make it happen.
Now there is a level ofeffectiveness in that, but I
always I really believe thatlife will still be limited to a
degree, because it's minusculein comparison with what you can
do when you actually stopreleasing resistance because at
(19:13):
some point you might geteverything that you thought you
wanted, and we've all had thisexperience.
You might get everything youthought you wanted, only to
realize that what you thoughtyou wanted was not what you
really wanted.
It was just what you thought youwanted, based on who you
thought you were.
So if you're not in touch withwho you really are, then often
our goals and dreams can beprojections of unmet needs.
(19:34):
And so, for me, part ofsurrender and there's two things
I'll share in response to yourquestion part of surrender is
not asking the question what doI want?
Part of surrender is asking adifferent question, and part of
that question is what is it thatlife is seeking to express
through me?
What is it that the universe isseeking to manifest through me?
What is it that the universe isseeking to create through me?
(19:55):
And when you can becomeavailable and receptive and
listen and be open to thatdeeper impulse of what life is
seeking to create and expressand manifest through you, so
that you can catch that vision,then you can align your
personality and your mind andyour ego in alignment with that
(20:16):
deeper impulse, that deeperintuition, that deeper guidance,
that deeper expression of yoursoul, then you can sort of set
your goals and your strategy andyour plan and your resources to
support the fulfillment of whatyou're feeling in terms of your
deepest truth, and so that'sone thing I feel like there's
purpose.
Speaker 1 (20:34):
That comes through that as well.
Right, your purpose, likeliterally, is shining through
when you're asking that question, you know, what does the
universe seek to express itselfthrough me?
That's such a beautifulquestion, right, because it
means that it's not your way.
You know, you used to laughit's my way or the highway.
That's usually what my parentswould say um, but when it's like
(20:57):
what?
What does the universe want toexpress through me?
I think that's just a beautifulway that somebody who's in a
challenging position might thinkI've tried all these things,
I'm trying my life, I'm workingreally hard at it and I don't
seem to feel fulfilled.
And I I often find, when I lookinto my own experience of like
discontent.
It was like when I was feelingdiscontent, it was because it
(21:19):
was always trying to be what canI get, what can I accumulate,
rather than?
Speaker 2 (21:25):
Dissatisfaction is a sign of growth.
So if you're feeling discontent, I would say congratulations,
you are growing, you're growing,you're growing, you're actually
evolving, because you know,when you're a child you're
content with playing with toys,but at a certain point you start
growing up and the things thatused to please you and that you
used to be content with nolonger are fulfilling.
(21:45):
So the fact that you'rediscontent, for me, is a sign
that you have outgrown the levelthat you're discontent for me
is a sign that you have outgrownthe level that you've been.
The challenge is when many of us, when we feel discontent, we
are scared of that feeling, andso we try to avoid that feeling.
We distract ourselves from thatfeeling.
We're like oh shit, what doesthis mean?
And so we drink it away, smokeit away, drug it away, sex it
(22:06):
away, just so that we don't haveto feel that discontent.
And so to me, if we canacknowledge the discontent and
feel the discontent and tell thetruth to ourselves about the
discontent, I would say feel thediscontent, feel it, be with it
and let that discontent moveyou in a direction.
Let that discontent move youbeyond that to ask the deeper
(22:28):
question in terms of who am Iand what's real and what is it
that's seeking to happen.
So, to me, dissatisfaction isnot bad.
It's just a sign that you'reoutgrown.
Your current level and the nextlevel of your life requires the
next level of you, and the nextlevel of you requires that you
let go of what is no longeraligned, the challenges.
As human beings, we tend tohold on to what's no longer
(22:51):
working, out of familiarity, outof comfort, out of safety, and
and that simply blocks ourblessing I'm always, I'm always
conscious of that.
Speaker 1 (22:59):
Because why do?
Why do human beings, you know,like sometimes I look into my
own experience as well it's likewell, why do we like to hold on
to the familiar?
Speaker 2 (23:08):
out of fear, out of fear so it's always fear, so
there's always two emotionsyou've got love and fear yeah, I
would say the ego doesn't wantto control the ego, or I should
say the ego, that which wemistakenly perceive ourselves to
be based on mind, body, name,form, belief systems, past
(23:33):
stories, experiences, memories,traumas.
You know from the past thesense of identification and the
way in which we hold on toourselves and what we perceive
of ourselves.
That sense of holding anidentity and identification is
ego ourselves.
(23:55):
That sense of holding anidentity and identification is
ego and ego.
The ego's job is to protect youfrom getting hurt like you were
hurt when you were young, likeyou were hurt when you were five
, like you were hurt when youwere 15 and 12 and eight and
nine, and 10 and seven.
What have you?
So the ego's job is to protectyou from getting hurt and the
ego's job is to reinforce itsexistence.
So when we talk about surrender,when we talk about letting go,
(24:17):
when we talk about opening tothe new for the ego, that is
terrifying, because surrenderand letting go and the new for
the ego feels like a death.
And so the ego is constantlyseeking to control, to protect
you.
Because if I stay with what Iknow, if I stay with who I've
(24:37):
been, then at least I know whatis and at least I know I have
some level of control.
But if I open to the new, thenew possibilities, the new
question, the new relationship,the new love, even if it's good
for me, I'm moving into therealm of the unknown, which
requires that I let go and I'mnot in control anymore.
(24:57):
And so the ego doesn't want tochange.
The ego wants everything andeveryone else to change.
It wants to stay the same, andthat's a way that the ego tends
to reinforce itself and staysafe.
So holding on is awell-intended strategy and
protection mechanism of the egoto keep us safe.
Speaker 1 (25:16):
So if someone is needing to let go of something
that's unhealthy for one reasonor another, how do they do that?
Speaker 2 (25:24):
I think if you're in a situation where you're stuck,
where you're blocked, wherethings aren't working, where
you're not happy you're stuckwhere you're blocked, where
things aren't working, whereyou're not happy One of the
first places that you can startto keep it simple is or, I would
say, one of the things thattends to keep us stuck are all
the ways that we lie toourselves.
As human beings, we do not tellourselves the truth, we live in
(25:49):
denial.
We lie to ourselves, we stay inrelationships that don't work.
We work jobs that we hate.
Right?
We say yes when we mean no.
We betray ourselves to get love, validation and approval.
So, to truly shift your life,there is no transformation,
there is no breakthrough, thereis no next level without the
(26:10):
truth.
And so if you're able to justcome to the point of telling
yourself the truth number onewhat lies am I telling myself
Sounds simple, but not alwayseasy.
Like what lies am I tellingmyself?
What am I pretending to notknow?
What is it costing me?
And often we're afraid oftelling ourselves the truth
(26:32):
because we're afraid of theconsequence of what will happen
if we speak the truth.
So I tell people just take thepressure off of yourself of
having to even take any actionand just acknowledge the truth.
And the truth might sound likeI'm not happy.
The truth might sound like Ihate my job.
The truth might sound like andyou don't have to leave your job
.
The truth might sound like Ihate my job.
The truth might sound like andyou don't have to leave your job
(26:53):
.
The truth might sound like I'mnot in love with my wife or my
husband.
I haven't been in love for fiveyears.
The truth might sound like Ihave an alcohol problem.
And just to start with thetruth, to me it's the truth that
sets us free.
You can't really shiftsomething or change something
unless you acknowledge whereyou're at.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
I mean, that's like total awareness, right, it's
awareness of where you're at,and I think that that helps with
a little self introspection.
But, like then, I sort of liketo go.
Sometimes I love to you know,know, love to give my audience
this, because the audience is sosmart, they like to go.
Well, okay, I'm aware of that.
Now what?
(27:37):
How do I actually let go ofsomething that isn't right for
me?
Is there a way in which I cando it?
Speaker 2 (27:43):
you speak your truth well, I'm not saying it's you
speak your truth if you stopbullshitting yourself and you
start telling the truth toyourself.
And as simple as most of us, weare constantly lying to
ourselves.
If you really acknowledge thetruth to yourself, that is huge,
because that will lead to youfeeling certain feelings, and
(28:05):
many times we don't acknowledgethe truth so we don't truly feel
what's underneath that.
And sometimes you know, totruly surrender and let go is a
death, and what we have to allowourselves to is to acknowledge
the truth and to feel the painor the grief.
(28:25):
You cannot truly, truly let gountil you come to acceptance and
then you come to a moment offeeling, let's just say the
grief.
To allow yourself to reallygrieve is grieving that allows
you to let go.
You can't really let go fullyunless you allow yourself to
(28:49):
grieve fully.
You can't fully releasesomething or someone truly from
your heart and move on.
You might let go physically,but you won't be able to move on
emotionally unless you reallyallow yourself to grieve.
And so I think one stage that'sreally important is to allow
yourself to feel the grieving,the death, the grieving that
(29:10):
comes with that, and I thinkthat's a step as well.
Speaker 1 (29:13):
Beautiful, so it's keep finding more and more joy
by following this path.
Speaker 2 (29:18):
You know, as I evolve I'll say it this way as I
evolve, and the deeper I go,because for me, life is a
constant process of surrender,it's a continual process of
deeper levels of surrendering tothe truth of what I am, which I
think we all are at a deeperlevel of oneness.
So, as I evolve, it'sinteresting because the more I
(29:43):
evolve, the less choice I feel Ihave.
Let me repeat the more I evolve, the less choice I feel I have,
the freer I feel I have.
Let me repeat the more I evolve, the less choice I feel I have,
the freer I feel.
Speaker 1 (29:58):
Is that because you're allowing the energy to
come through?
Speaker 2 (30:02):
Because the less ego, the less holding on, the less I
, the less cuteness there is,the more life flows.
And so the deeper I evolve, theless choice I feel I have, and
I think it happens for all of usthe more we evolve.
(30:22):
The things that you used to beable to do and the certain
decisions that you used to beable to, I'll go here, I'll do
this, I'll do that even if itmay not be in alignment, but I
want to do that.
You're just not able to do asmuch.
It just doesn't resonate andit's not as in alignment.
(30:44):
And so for me, as I've gonedeeper, it's coming into a
deeper alignment with thenatural flow of life.
That life is coming into deeperalignment with nature as it
flows.
And so for me that's opened upa deeper freedom, uh, a deeper
(31:07):
freedom in life, because theless I feel as though I, as an
individual self, am the doer,the less I feel like as an
individual construct is makingmy life happen.
And so what is opened up is adeeper freedom to witness life
(31:32):
in its amazingness, to witnesslife in its intelligence
happening.
And so, as I let go andsurrender and I really feel less
and less that I am the doer andI really feel less and less
that I am the doer.
(31:52):
I'm seeing life happen.
Speaker 1 (31:54):
Thank you so much for being on the show this week and
sharing your wisdom, yourknowledge and your life story.
Speaker 2 (32:01):
And it can be tricky for us to let go, but there's
something beautiful when we doand I just wanted to say, for
all those who want to know moreabout you, tell us a little bit
about your Bali Bliss experience, because I know you're doing
this, sure, yeah Well, first Iwould just encourage everyone to
get the book the Magic ofSurrender, and then, for those
(32:22):
that perhaps want to go deeper,my most powerful work and
experience is an event calledBoundless Bliss, the Bali
Breakthrough Experience.
It's a 12-day experience, anexperiential seminar, training
without walls in Bali, and I'vedone this event for 12 years,
done 22 events.
We take 18 people at a time andit's a deep dive,
(32:43):
transformational immersion.
And so, if you're someone, youfeel you're ready for the next
level of your life, you're readyto heal, you're ready to
transform, you're ready totransform, you feel as though
you've been put on the planetfor a purpose that is bigger
than yourself and you're readyto share your gifts with the
world.
I create the 12-day experiencethat is designed to help you
become aware of the patterns andthe layers of your conditioning
(33:04):
and to help free you from thelayers of conditioning so that
you can really find your powerand share your, share, your
gifts.
And so the next event is july,the 20th through the 31st uh,
that's in in a few months inbali, uh, www.
Boundless bliss balicom.
That's boundless bliss balicom.
Speaker 1 (33:25):
I'll have that link there, so you definitely go and
check that out if you'reinterested in cute work, because
cute share some absolutelyincredible wisdom and if you
like what you've heard today inthe conversation, cute will make
sure you go to your deeperlevels, no doubt.
And what a beautiful place todo it.
Awesome cute blacks and thisweek's super soul model.
(33:49):
Thank you very much indeed.
Thanks for tuning into thisepisode and if you've enjoyed
this or any of the others,please remember you can support
the show and your contributionsdo allow us to keep bringing you
the best guests.
In the meantime, till the nextepisode, I wish you green lights
all the way.
In this episode I'm speaking to transformational
teacher and best-selling author,coot Blackson.
Coot's appeared across manydifferent TV shows across the
USA and he's here on this showsharing with us the magic of
surrender.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Surrender is when you stop trying to force and
manipulate life to fit yourlimited idea of how you think it
should be and what you think itshould look like, so that you
can take the limitations off oflife.
Speaker 1 (00:35):
Hello and welcome to the James Granstrom podcast
Super Soul Model series, where Ihelp people tune and tap in to
their natural state ofwell-being.
This week's guest is a belovedinspirational speaker and
transformational teacher.
He's the author of best-sellingbooks you Are the One and the
Magic of Surrender.
He's widely considered the nextgenerational leader in personal
(00:55):
development and his mission isto awaken, inspire and help
people on their mission to liveauthentically.
He's been featured on so manyTV shows, but what I like to
call him is our very own supersoul model this week.
So welcome to the show.
Coop Blackson, Thanks forhaving me.
Absolute joy to have you.
So, Coop, tell us a little bitabout your story, because you're
helping thousands uponthousands of people change and
(01:19):
transform their lives.
You've written these two booksyou Are the One and the Magic of
Surrender.
What brought you to this place?
I?
Speaker 2 (01:26):
was born in Ghana, west Africa, my father's from
Ghana, my mother's Japanese.
I grew up in London.
So for me I've always, you know, as a young boy, there was
always a question for me interms of okay, where am I from?
And I didn't feel like I wasfrom Ghana, I didn't feel like I
was from the UK, I didn't feellike I was Japanese, I felt like
(01:47):
I was from everywhere andnowhere.
And so that, I think, inspireda deep questioning from a very
young age who am I?
And so that, I think, was thefirst question that drove me on
the spiritual path.
And as a young boy, my firstmemories were kind of
interesting.
My first memories as a youngboy, my first memories were kind
of interesting.
My first memories as a youngboy, I remember seeing a
(02:09):
crippled woman crawling on thefloor and she picks up the sand
that this man walked on, wipedit on her face and stood up.
And so, week after week, I grewup seeing blind people see and
deaf people hear, and peoplestand up out of wheelchairs.
Speaker 1 (02:23):
What country were you in at this stage?
By the way, this was in the UK,in the UK.
And what part of the UK did yougrow up?
Speaker 2 (02:29):
in South London.
I grew up in Clapham, Brixton,Wandsworth, and then Fenton.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
I know that area because that's where I've lived
for like 20 years at some point.
Speaker 2 (02:36):
Yeah, yeah.
And so for me, my childhood wasa bit unusual because I grew up
around these miracles, but Ididn't think anything of it.
I didn't think anything unusualof it because it's all I knew.
You know, the same man whosesand this woman picked up would
look at a woman in a wheelchairand say, hey, why are you in
this wheelchair?
Stand up.
And he would touch them andthey would stand up and they
(02:57):
would start walking.
People would come in withwalking crutches and the same
man would look at this personwith crutches and say, throw
your crutches away.
This man was my father.
He built 300 churches in Ghana,west Africa, huge, hundreds of
thousands of followers.
A huge church in London at hisheight in the 80s I don't know
if you know the the Wandsworth,right next to Wandsworth Town
(03:17):
Hall, was a bingo hall and itwas a huge bingo hall on
Wandsworth High Street.
And so we took over the bingohall and four to 5,000 people
every, literally every Sunday,and he built a huge church.
My father was like a considereda miracle man of Africa, a very
mystical, spiritual,enlightened type of figure, and
(03:38):
so that's how I grew up, and soat age eight, I began speaking
in my father's churches when Iwas 14.
Speaker 1 (03:44):
Did he get you up there?
Did he say, off, you go, son,get up there and say something.
How did it happen?
Speaker 2 (03:50):
It wasn't even like that, it was more like at eight
years old I was more interestedin playing soccer Cool.
Speaker 1 (03:55):
You were a child right, you were a kid.
You wouldn't have much.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
I was more interested in being naughty, and so they
didn't think that was a goodidea.
They literally cornered me, putme on the front row of the
church and I would just fallasleep, and one Sunday they just
literally threw me on stage andthey said my dad said speak,
and that began my speaking, andI don't really know what
happened other than wordsstarted to come out of my mouth.
(04:20):
I don't really remember whathappened, other than things
started to emerge.
It was like I was channeling,and that began my relationship
to a deeper connection withsomething, an intelligence,
consciousness, the divine, theuniverse that I was really not
able to quantify or explain.
But from age eight, that also,you could say, started my
(04:42):
spiritual path in a veryintentional way, because that's
when I really began questioning,like, who am I, why am I here,
what's the purpose of life, whatthe hell is happening to me?
And so I would sneak into myfather's office and he had
literally a thousand books onhis bookshelf and I would start.
I started reading his books.
I started devouring these books, everyone from the Eastern
mystics, people likeKrishnamurti and Osho and Ramana
(05:04):
Maharishi, to Wayne Dyer,deepak Chopra, marianne
Williamson, you know, louise Hay.
And so from eight to 18, Iprobably read 800 books in the
sort of realm and field ofpersonal development, self-help,
spirituality, psychology, andthat began.
That began my journey.
But when I was 14, it was a verypivotal moment in my life.
(05:29):
And when I was 14, I wasactually ordained as a minister
and my father announced to thecongregation one Sunday my son
is taking over, he's mysuccessor.
Everybody was happy but me, andmy entire life was basically
carved out and planned out andset out for me by everyone else,
except you, yep.
(05:50):
And I was too afraid to speakmy truth.
I was too afraid to tell myfather how I felt.
I think, like many of us, weallow fear to hijack us.
We allow fear to limit our fullexpression and our authenticity
and our voice.
My fear was if I dare to speakmy truth, then I'm going to be
(06:12):
outcast.
If I dare to speak my truth,I'm going to lose my father's
love.
If I dare to speak my truth,then I'm going to be alone.
And so I said nothing for fouryears and it took me four years
to really go through a deepinternal introspection and
questioning and grieving andletting go, because by the time
I turned 17 and a half 18,.
I had to make a choice, as youknow, finishing A-levels, going
(06:35):
to university.
I projected into my future andI had to make some decisions.
I chose not to go to universityand I looked into my future.
I saw that I could follow theexpected path for my life.
I could take over my father'sorganization.
And as I projected to age 20,age 30, age 40, age 50, age 60,
as I projected into my future, Isaw that even if I became
(06:58):
successful by the worldstandards, by my father's
standards, if I don't havemyself, if I don't have my truth
, if I don't have my soul, myown integrity, what kind of
success is that?
And I felt my soul calling meto come to America.
And I think sometimes what yoursoul guides you to do doesn't
(07:18):
always make sense.
It never makes sense.
Q.
It never makes sense.
Speaker 1 (07:22):
That's how I found myself in Spain.
I never planned on coming here.
My parents immigrated here andI looked after my, my family
when they weren't well and whenmy father made his transition, I
decided that I still feel likethis place is calling me to stay
, and going back to Londondidn't feel right.
So, very much like anybody onthis mission, when they're
(07:45):
starting to get that soul call,as I like to call it, you know
the universe is ringing.
Are you going to listen?
Are you going to pick it up andsay what's your truth, what's
your authenticity?
Does this feel right to you?
Yes, I love the way MatthewMcConaughey says it.
It says you've either got soulcredits or soul debits, and when
you don't speak your truth,it's like you're only putting
(08:06):
soul debits out there.
And you know it just sounds tome that that trip taking moving
to America for you was just likeyeah, please bank, I want to
bank that soul bank, that soulof mine.
So you followed the path to theStates and what happened?
Speaker 2 (08:22):
Well, I had to have a conversation with my father.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
And how did that conversation go?
Well, I had to have aconversation with my father, and
how did that conversation go.
Speaker 2 (08:26):
Well, when I really chose to, I really feel as
though, when you listen to yoursoul, you'll always end up in
the right place in the righttime, doing the right thing with
the right people, even thoughthe route that you take may not
be the one that you most expect.
And so I realized I had to havethis conversation and face my
fears and cut a long story short.
I had the conversation at 18.
(08:47):
We didn't speak for two years.
After that cut an even longerstory short, which we can get
into, but I ended up winning agreen card in the green card
lottery and that's what enabledme 55,000 people basically win a
green card in the green cardlottery out of millions of
applicants and I won.
(09:08):
And that was, for me,confirmation that I was on the
right path.
And that's when I really feltthe support of life, the support
of the universe.
And so, as an 18 year old kid,with $1,000, maybe actually $800
in my pocket no, no one in theus two suitcases and a green
card uh showed up in in losangeles and went and found
(09:31):
mentors and teachers and many ofthe authors I'd read about,
studied with some of them,learned from some of them.
Speaker 1 (09:36):
yeah and, uh, that's what brought me to, to america I
have to say I love your storybecause I I can resonate with
your story because I've wonstuff so many times and I'm like
, wow, how this comes about.
I call this the green lights oflife.
I'm always sort of talkingabout it on this podcast the
green lights and how to tune in.
(09:57):
So you keep receiving thesegreen lights by keep following
your soul, by keep followingwhat feels right for you.
So anyone who's listening inlike what you're saying is it
sounds like almost miraculous,it sounds magical, but actually
it's just following what feelsright for you, and what's right
for you might not be right forsomeone else.
So that's a really bold move ofyou.
(10:20):
But it's nice to have thatfoundation behind you to get
that green card.
So that gives you a bit ofhumor and a bit of life going.
I'm lucky, I'm supported, I'mblessed, I'm worthy and if I
follow this, more good stuff'sgot to happen.
So okay, so you got the greencard.
Then what happened?
Speaker 2 (10:39):
Yeah, I mean I got the green card.
I came to America following mysoul.
I mean I got the green card, Icame to America following my
soul.
So much happened for me.
I went and found many of thementors and the teachers and
authors I'd studied with, andthen again, it's a long story so
we can dissect it in differentways, but, in a nutshell, I
(10:59):
reached a point in my journeywhere I felt as though things
weren't working.
I reached a point in my journeywhere I felt as though things
weren't working.
I reached a point in my journeywhere I felt as though I
reached a dead end.
I reached a point in my journeywhere I felt like I had, I had
reached the end of my own ego'scapacity to manifest my life and
I kind of gave up.
When I say gave up, Isurrendered, and in that that
(11:21):
led me to travel.
I was tired of reading thebooks, I was tired of studying
other teachers, I was tired ofreading Deepak and Tony Robbins
and Zig Ziglar and Mark VictorHansen.
I wanted to know truth formyself, and so that's what took
me to walk the Camino innorthern Spain.
I said, basically said a prayerone day, when everything fell
apart, broke up with mygirlfriend, a TV project that I
(11:44):
was pursuing at a young age kindof fell apart and I said to the
universe like I don't know what, what to do with my life
anymore.
I don't know what I'm supposedlike, I have no idea, I
surrender.
And I was guided to walk theCamino.
The Camino is a 900 kilometertrek in northern Spain, and so
(12:07):
it's a walk.
It's a spiritual walk thatpeople like Dante and Chaucer
and Francis of Assisi have done.
It's on an energetic vortexline, a very powerful walk.
And so I did this walk and thattook me to Spain, which then
took me to Thailand, which thentook me to Israel, which then
took me to India.
And I spent about four monthsin India, and for me it was my
time in India where I hadcertain awakenings and a deeper
(12:30):
experience of my true nature andmy purpose and why I was on the
planet.
And that's what brought me backto America again and with a new
vision 20-some years ago tocoach people and guide people.
This is before coaching was apopular thing, this is before
social media, and I started justfrom a sincere desire to help
(12:52):
people, coaching peopleone-on-one, no idea what I was
doing, but soon started todevelop my own way of working
with people.
That really transformed livesand before I knew it, people
were flying from around theworld to work with me one-on-one
, and that just evolved intosmall groups and large groups
and larger events and seminarsand two best-selling books.
So that's the short version.
Speaker 1 (13:12):
I think that what's really relatable for people is
just that you know, some peopleare at crossroads, some people
just don't know what to do.
You can read a lot of personaldevelopment.
You can read a lot of spiritualbooks.
I know I've read literallythousands.
I've devoured everything in thelast 20-odd years.
You know I've been on my wakeup since the year 2000 at least,
and after a couple ofnear-death experiences you start
(13:37):
to ask a couple of questions.
There's got to be a little bitmore to life than just what
meets the eye For someonelistening in.
You know, I think you knowparticularly what I like about
your book, the Magic ofSurrender.
I think that this is a reallyimportant part and I like to
come back to this surrender overand over again and I would like
(13:57):
to really talk about surrendera little bit.
Let's do it Because I thinkthat this is really helpful,
because it's like a letting gotime and time again of things
that you know.
Sometimes you try to controleverything, but there's a bigger
picture or a bigger handhelping you.
Very much like that hand thatgave you the green card saying
this is the right way, this isthe right way Come.
(14:18):
Much like that hand that gaveyou the green card saying this
is the right way.
This is the right way.
Come this way, come this way,come this way.
So if someone's having achallenge right now and
everybody somewhere is havingsome type of challenge, how
could they surrender into that,to a greater power, to tap into
their inner guidance, to tapinto the universe, tap into life
itself?
What practical thing could theyapply?
Speaker 2 (14:37):
We have to set a context for what we mean by
surrender, because I think whenwe just say surrender, for a lot
of people they'll have theirown interpretation or
connotation of what surrendermeans.
And if, without a certainframework, we're having 50
different conversations?
Because I think many timesthere's so many misconceptions
(15:00):
about surrender, this idea thatsurrender is weak or giving up
or waving the white flag, orthat if I surrender I'm going to
be a doormat or taken advantageof, or it just means sitting
there and doing nothing and justwatching television, or the
(15:21):
universe is going to bringeverything to me, or if I
surrender, I won't manifest mygoals, dreams and desires, if I
surrender I'm going to get lessin life.
And I'm actually saying no.
If you really understand thetrue meaning and the true
essence of what surrender is,what if you didn't get less in
life?
But what if you actually gotmore?
More than you could haveplanned, more than you could
have imagined, more than youcould have intended, with the
limitation of your consciousmind?
(15:42):
And so when we say surrender atleast when I say surrender, I
mean it is a letting go ofcontrol, or I should say the
illusion that you were even incontrol in the first place.
To me, control is the masteraddiction.
Surrender is when you stoptrying to force and manipulate
life to fit your limited idea ofhow you think it should be and
(16:06):
what you think it should looklike, so that you can take the
limitations off of life and beopen and be available to
allowing life to show you,allowing life in its
intelligence to reveal itself toyou.
And I think many of us, if welook at the best things, if we
really look at the best thingsin life that have happened to us
(16:27):
, the really best things, mostof it we didn't plan, most of it
we didn't sit there and sketchout every detail.
A lot of it just kind ofhappened in the process of
living life itself.
And so surrender is a lettinggo.
It's when you take thelimitations off of life and
you're available and you're openand you're receptive.
And I think that's where themagic is.
(16:48):
If you look at the really greatones a Jesus, a Buddha, a Gandhi
, a Mother Teresa, a Mandela,jesus, a Buddha, a Gandhi, a
Mother Teresa, a Mandela, martinLuther King, a Bruce Lee, a
Muhammad Ali at some point theyall surrendered, they all let go
of their idea of who theythought they should be.
(17:09):
They all let go and maybesometimes life fell apart.
Maybe Mandela went to prisonfor 27 years, which seemed like
the worst thing.
But many times, if you thinkabout what if he didn't go to
prison?
What if he didn't go throughthat experience?
What if shit didn't hit the fanand life didn't fall apart,
would he have ended up?
Would they have ended up howthey ended up, or would the
(17:29):
story have been very different?
And so often, when we go throughthese seemingly challenging,
difficult, dark nights of thesoul, negative experiences,
things not working out, it seemslike the worst thing from the
perspective of our mind, fromthe perspective of our
personality and ego seems likethe worst thing.
But often from our limitedperspective, we're not able to
see the entire picture.
(17:50):
And sometimes things need tofall apart to make room for the
next level, to make room for thenew opportunity, to make room
for the new blessing, to makeroom for the right partner and
the right soulmate.
And so I think that surrenderis the most powerful thing that
we can do.
If you look at the great ones,they all surrendered and in that
surrender they transcendedtheir human limitations and I
(18:16):
think they were able to tap intoanother dimension of life, and
that's when life was able tomanifest through them, life was
able to create through them,life was able to use them in
ways that they couldn't haveimagined.
So, if you look at the oldparadigm, which is more about
what I call the ego-based modelfor creating life, paradigm,
(18:37):
which is more about what I callthe ego-based model for creating
life, which is control, whichis more about know what you want
, get clear on what you want andgo make it happen, and I think
there is a level of that seemslike a Newtonian essence.
Speaker 1 (18:48):
Right, that's a Newtonian version.
Speaker 2 (18:50):
If you look at so much of self-help, it's all like
get clear on what you want,know what you want, set your
goals, go, make, go.
Make it happen.
Now there is a level ofeffectiveness in that, but I
always I really believe thatlife will still be limited to a
degree, because it's minusculein comparison with what you can
do when you actually stopreleasing resistance because at
(19:13):
some point you might geteverything that you thought you
wanted, and we've all had thisexperience.
You might get everything youthought you wanted, only to
realize that what you thoughtyou wanted was not what you
really wanted.
It was just what you thought youwanted, based on who you
thought you were.
So if you're not in touch withwho you really are, then often
our goals and dreams can beprojections of unmet needs.
(19:34):
And so, for me, part ofsurrender and there's two things
I'll share in response to yourquestion part of surrender is
not asking the question what doI want?
Part of surrender is asking adifferent question, and part of
that question is what is it thatlife is seeking to express
through me?
What is it that the universe isseeking to manifest through me?
What is it that the universe isseeking to create through me?
(19:55):
And when you can becomeavailable and receptive and
listen and be open to thatdeeper impulse of what life is
seeking to create and expressand manifest through you, so
that you can catch that vision,then you can align your
personality and your mind andyour ego in alignment with that
(20:16):
deeper impulse, that deeperintuition, that deeper guidance,
that deeper expression of yoursoul, then you can sort of set
your goals and your strategy andyour plan and your resources to
support the fulfillment of whatyou're feeling in terms of your
deepest truth, and so that'sone thing I feel like there's
purpose.
Speaker 1 (20:34):
That comes through that as well.
Right, your purpose, likeliterally, is shining through
when you're asking that question, you know, what does the
universe seek to express itselfthrough me?
That's such a beautifulquestion, right, because it
means that it's not your way.
You know, you used to laughit's my way or the highway.
That's usually what my parentswould say um, but when it's like
(20:57):
what?
What does the universe want toexpress through me?
I think that's just a beautifulway that somebody who's in a
challenging position might thinkI've tried all these things,
I'm trying my life, I'm workingreally hard at it and I don't
seem to feel fulfilled.
And I I often find, when I lookinto my own experience of like
discontent.
It was like when I was feelingdiscontent, it was because it
(21:19):
was always trying to be what canI get, what can I accumulate,
rather than?
Speaker 2 (21:25):
Dissatisfaction is a sign of growth.
So if you're feeling discontent, I would say congratulations,
you are growing, you're growing,you're growing, you're actually
evolving, because you know,when you're a child you're
content with playing with toys,but at a certain point you start
growing up and the things thatused to please you and that you
used to be content with nolonger are fulfilling.
(21:45):
So the fact that you'rediscontent, for me, is a sign
that you have outgrown the levelthat you're discontent for me
is a sign that you have outgrownthe level that you've been.
The challenge is when many of us, when we feel discontent, we
are scared of that feeling, andso we try to avoid that feeling.
We distract ourselves from thatfeeling.
We're like oh shit, what doesthis mean?
And so we drink it away, smokeit away, drug it away, sex it
(22:06):
away, just so that we don't haveto feel that discontent.
And so to me, if we canacknowledge the discontent and
feel the discontent and tell thetruth to ourselves about the
discontent, I would say feel thediscontent, feel it, be with it
and let that discontent moveyou in a direction.
Let that discontent move youbeyond that to ask the deeper
(22:28):
question in terms of who am Iand what's real and what is it
that's seeking to happen.
So, to me, dissatisfaction isnot bad.
It's just a sign that you'reoutgrown.
Your current level and the nextlevel of your life requires the
next level of you, and the nextlevel of you requires that you
let go of what is no longeraligned, the challenges.
As human beings, we tend tohold on to what's no longer
(22:51):
working, out of familiarity, outof comfort, out of safety, and
and that simply blocks ourblessing I'm always, I'm always
conscious of that.
Speaker 1 (22:59):
Because why do?
Why do human beings, you know,like sometimes I look into my
own experience as well it's likewell, why do we like to hold on
to the familiar?
Speaker 2 (23:08):
out of fear, out of fear so it's always fear, so
there's always two emotionsyou've got love and fear yeah, I
would say the ego doesn't wantto control the ego, or I should
say the ego, that which wemistakenly perceive ourselves to
be based on mind, body, name,form, belief systems, past
(23:33):
stories, experiences, memories,traumas.
You know from the past thesense of identification and the
way in which we hold on toourselves and what we perceive
of ourselves.
That sense of holding anidentity and identification is
ego ourselves.
(23:55):
That sense of holding anidentity and identification is
ego and ego.
The ego's job is to protect youfrom getting hurt like you were
hurt when you were young, likeyou were hurt when you were five
, like you were hurt when youwere 15 and 12 and eight and
nine, and 10 and seven.
What have you?
So the ego's job is to protectyou from getting hurt and the
ego's job is to reinforce itsexistence.
So when we talk about surrender,when we talk about letting go,
(24:17):
when we talk about opening tothe new for the ego, that is
terrifying, because surrenderand letting go and the new for
the ego feels like a death.
And so the ego is constantlyseeking to control, to protect
you.
Because if I stay with what Iknow, if I stay with who I've
(24:37):
been, then at least I know whatis and at least I know I have
some level of control.
But if I open to the new, thenew possibilities, the new
question, the new relationship,the new love, even if it's good
for me, I'm moving into therealm of the unknown, which
requires that I let go and I'mnot in control anymore.
(24:57):
And so the ego doesn't want tochange.
The ego wants everything andeveryone else to change.
It wants to stay the same, andthat's a way that the ego tends
to reinforce itself and staysafe.
So holding on is awell-intended strategy and
protection mechanism of the egoto keep us safe.
Speaker 1 (25:16):
So if someone is needing to let go of something
that's unhealthy for one reasonor another, how do they do that?
Speaker 2 (25:24):
I think if you're in a situation where you're stuck,
where you're blocked, wherethings aren't working, where
you're not happy you're stuckwhere you're blocked, where
things aren't working, whereyou're not happy One of the
first places that you can startto keep it simple is or, I would
say, one of the things thattends to keep us stuck are all
the ways that we lie toourselves.
As human beings, we do not tellourselves the truth, we live in
(25:49):
denial.
We lie to ourselves, we stay inrelationships that don't work.
We work jobs that we hate.
Right?
We say yes when we mean no.
We betray ourselves to get love, validation and approval.
So, to truly shift your life,there is no transformation,
there is no breakthrough, thereis no next level without the
(26:10):
truth.
And so if you're able to justcome to the point of telling
yourself the truth number onewhat lies am I telling myself
Sounds simple, but not alwayseasy.
Like what lies am I tellingmyself?
What am I pretending to notknow?
What is it costing me?
And often we're afraid oftelling ourselves the truth
(26:32):
because we're afraid of theconsequence of what will happen
if we speak the truth.
So I tell people just take thepressure off of yourself of
having to even take any actionand just acknowledge the truth.
And the truth might sound likeI'm not happy.
The truth might sound like Ihate my job.
The truth might sound like andyou don't have to leave your job
.
The truth might sound like Ihate my job.
The truth might sound like andyou don't have to leave your job
(26:53):
.
The truth might sound like I'mnot in love with my wife or my
husband.
I haven't been in love for fiveyears.
The truth might sound like Ihave an alcohol problem.
And just to start with thetruth, to me it's the truth that
sets us free.
You can't really shiftsomething or change something
unless you acknowledge whereyou're at.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
I mean, that's like total awareness, right, it's
awareness of where you're at,and I think that that helps with
a little self introspection.
But, like then, I sort of liketo go.
Sometimes I love to you know,know, love to give my audience
this, because the audience is sosmart, they like to go.
Well, okay, I'm aware of that.
Now what?
(27:37):
How do I actually let go ofsomething that isn't right for
me?
Is there a way in which I cando it?
Speaker 2 (27:43):
you speak your truth well, I'm not saying it's you
speak your truth if you stopbullshitting yourself and you
start telling the truth toyourself.
And as simple as most of us, weare constantly lying to
ourselves.
If you really acknowledge thetruth to yourself, that is huge,
because that will lead to youfeeling certain feelings, and
(28:05):
many times we don't acknowledgethe truth so we don't truly feel
what's underneath that.
And sometimes you know, totruly surrender and let go is a
death, and what we have to allowourselves to is to acknowledge
the truth and to feel the painor the grief.
(28:25):
You cannot truly, truly let gountil you come to acceptance and
then you come to a moment offeeling, let's just say the
grief.
To allow yourself to reallygrieve is grieving that allows
you to let go.
You can't really let go fullyunless you allow yourself to
(28:49):
grieve fully.
You can't fully releasesomething or someone truly from
your heart and move on.
You might let go physically,but you won't be able to move on
emotionally unless you reallyallow yourself to grieve.
And so I think one stage that'sreally important is to allow
yourself to feel the grieving,the death, the grieving that
(29:10):
comes with that, and I thinkthat's a step as well.
Speaker 1 (29:13):
Beautiful, so it's keep finding more and more joy
by following this path.
Speaker 2 (29:18):
You know, as I evolve I'll say it this way as I
evolve, and the deeper I go,because for me, life is a
constant process of surrender,it's a continual process of
deeper levels of surrendering tothe truth of what I am, which I
think we all are at a deeperlevel of oneness.
So, as I evolve, it'sinteresting because the more I
(29:43):
evolve, the less choice I feel Ihave.
Let me repeat the more I evolve, the less choice I feel I have,
the freer I feel I have.
Let me repeat the more I evolve, the less choice I feel I have,
the freer I feel.
Speaker 1 (29:58):
Is that because you're allowing the energy to
come through?
Speaker 2 (30:02):
Because the less ego, the less holding on, the less I
, the less cuteness there is,the more life flows.
And so the deeper I evolve, theless choice I feel I have, and
I think it happens for all of usthe more we evolve.
(30:22):
The things that you used to beable to do and the certain
decisions that you used to beable to, I'll go here, I'll do
this, I'll do that even if itmay not be in alignment, but I
want to do that.
You're just not able to do asmuch.
It just doesn't resonate andit's not as in alignment.
(30:44):
And so for me, as I've gonedeeper, it's coming into a
deeper alignment with thenatural flow of life.
That life is coming into deeperalignment with nature as it
flows.
And so for me that's opened upa deeper freedom, uh, a deeper
(31:07):
freedom in life, because theless I feel as though I, as an
individual self, am the doer,the less I feel like as an
individual construct is makingmy life happen.
And so what is opened up is adeeper freedom to witness life
(31:32):
in its amazingness, to witnesslife in its intelligence
happening.
And so, as I let go andsurrender and I really feel less
and less that I am the doer andI really feel less and less
that I am the doer.
(31:52):
I'm seeing life happen.
Speaker 1 (31:54):
Thank you so much for being on the show this week and
sharing your wisdom, yourknowledge and your life story.
Speaker 2 (32:01):
And it can be tricky for us to let go, but there's
something beautiful when we doand I just wanted to say, for
all those who want to know moreabout you, tell us a little bit
about your Bali Bliss experience, because I know you're doing
this, sure, yeah Well, first Iwould just encourage everyone to
get the book the Magic ofSurrender, and then, for those
(32:22):
that perhaps want to go deeper,my most powerful work and
experience is an event calledBoundless Bliss, the Bali
Breakthrough Experience.
It's a 12-day experience, anexperiential seminar, training
without walls in Bali, and I'vedone this event for 12 years,
done 22 events.
We take 18 people at a time andit's a deep dive,
(32:43):
transformational immersion.
And so, if you're someone, youfeel you're ready for the next
level of your life, you're readyto heal, you're ready to
transform, you're ready totransform, you feel as though
you've been put on the planetfor a purpose that is bigger
than yourself and you're readyto share your gifts with the
world.
I create the 12-day experiencethat is designed to help you
become aware of the patterns andthe layers of your conditioning
(33:04):
and to help free you from thelayers of conditioning so that
you can really find your powerand share your, share, your
gifts.
And so the next event is july,the 20th through the 31st uh,
that's in in a few months inbali, uh, www.
Boundless bliss balicom.
That's boundless bliss balicom.
Speaker 1 (33:25):
I'll have that link there, so you definitely go and
check that out if you'reinterested in cute work, because
cute share some absolutelyincredible wisdom and if you
like what you've heard today inthe conversation, cute will make
sure you go to your deeperlevels, no doubt.
And what a beautiful place todo it.
Awesome cute blacks and thisweek's super soul model.
(33:49):
Thank you very much indeed.
Thanks for tuning into thisepisode and if you've enjoyed
this or any of the others,please remember you can support
the show and your contributionsdo allow us to keep bringing you
the best guests.
In the meantime, till the nextepisode, I wish you green lights
all the way.
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