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March 24, 2020 55 mins

The family adjusts to a completely new life in a new state, in a new town, with no school, and no friends, and no structure, and no schedule. You know what that means: time for Daddy School!

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Episode Transcript

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Speaker 1 (00:07):
I got It's go time, baby, Welcome to We Know's
Parenting and Peter McNerney Beth Newell. H Okay, a lot
to recap. A lot happened since we last checked in
with our listeners. But it's like very dramatic turn of

(00:28):
events this week for us and uniquely us and no
one else in the world. Yeah, okay, we were Actually
we even recorded last week's episode early because we were like, well,
we're gonna head out of town for two weeks and
we'll be back. And then since then we realized, oh,
I guess we live in Massachusetts now. Yeah, Like you

(00:51):
went up ahead of me with the kids to Massachusetts
and I was going to come like a couple of
days later. And then as soon as you left the
the tone of the news started to shift where I
was like, wait, I need to get out of here
now or I might not be able to leave, Like
what is happening? Um? Yeah, And we were in the

(01:11):
center of the of you know, all this Westchester. Yeah,
our schools were closing, So I feel like we had
a little bit more of a heads up in terms
of like forming a plan of like what we're gonna do,
and we didn't yet realize that like the extent to

(01:31):
which they were going to be shutting things down so quickly.
I think when we made this plan to leave, like
we didn't know this is going to be a permanent
Well I had enough foresight to pack the recording equipment. Yeah,
we probably have to record one episode while we're gone. Well,
by the time you left and then I was getting
ready to go, it was I suddenly was like, oh,

(01:53):
maybe I need to leave sooner rather than later, because
maybe other people are going to start to like flee
the city, and also like maybe we need Like I
was like, maybe we're going to be gone for more
than two weeks. I was like, maybe it's going to
be three or four weeks. And then by the time
I packed up all our stuff and I was just
trying to get like everything I could think of, Like

(02:13):
I was like, we need this apple TV, we need
this yoga mat weed. Yeah, it's just like every I
packed up, like you really learn what's important to you
and it really is mostly just food, food and clothing, um,
and I it's just And then by the time I
got here, like days in, it's like, wait, we might

(02:35):
live here for months, Like this is where we live
now like we can't, you know, like we have to
stay inside. Um, so we've been, but we've been very quarantined.
I mean I think we have you and I have
barely had time to talk about. Uh. It's been a

(02:57):
big adjustment to have uh, three adults, two kids, and
one dog living a house together with no no one
able to leave to do work. Yes, so we if
we have beth sisters here and her dog and we
are in a house, we've got way more space. This

(03:20):
is a very ancient summer house that my great grandfather bought.
That's all of my cousins and I and my dad
and his brothers and sisters and cousins spent every summer coming.
So we're very obviously lucky to have access to this place. Um.

(03:41):
Beth is allergic to it. I am severely allergic to
this house. But I'm proud of the progress we've made
in terms of bleaching down three of the rooms and
um we I started taking some zerotech, which is really
knocking me out at night. I went to bed last

(04:01):
night at eight thirty pm and I woke up this
morning at five am. And I have to say it
wasn't bad because I was wide awake at five am,
and I knew I had like two hours before anyone
would be awake, and I hadn't had that much alone
time in over a week. Like I was just like what,
I was like, this is great. Like I was like,

(04:22):
I guess I'm a five am person now because this
is the only way I'm going to have like peace. Honestly,
I think maybe you should be Yeah, I think you
should go to I mean what I would what I
lose out in the scenario, unfortunately, is any sort of
like TV or reading or recreational activity at nighttime. It
just means we do dinner, clean up, I like, get

(04:45):
relaxed for half an hour and go to bed, like
you know what. Not bad. I certainly loved this is
the first, not not the first, but this morning I've
been underslept and to wake up and hear that you
giving breakfast to our kids, and I was like, I
can sleep in thirty minutes. It was a real it

(05:07):
was a real treat for me as well. Yeah, so
how are we adjusting to quarantine life? Beth? Tell us,
let's hear from you first. Tell us about your job,
your work, how what's been hard? I think, what's meant,
I think this is hard for everybody right now because

(05:27):
everyone's having to make really a very annoying lifestyle adjustments,
but especially parents. But I feel like for me, the
relocation has been the difficulty because I was like, Okay,
I now have to make sure we have enough food
and supplies for this new, brand new location. And also
I'm very allergic to it and have to try to

(05:48):
figure this situation out. And like there's like a few
days when the news was starting to heat up in
terms of like what was going to happen, where I
was like, we might not be able to get packages
in a few days. Like I was like, we need
to figure this out now, like all of these things
you know, UM, which I don't I now don't think
that's going to be an issue, but I do think

(06:08):
like people are overloading the UM delivery people with because
of this, like because they can't leave their house. They're
just like, I'll just like quorder everything, but I just
need to order ten thousand rolls of toilet paper. Yeah,
Like that's the thing with the toilet paper. It makes
no sense we have a shortage of toilet paper because

(06:30):
none of us need any more toilet paper than we had.
We don't have a shortage. It's just everyone bought it
at the same week, right, It's just like we've created
like yeah, I don't think like I think. But this
was a criticism that some people had of the way

(06:50):
politicians rolled out this information was that like they didn't
explain to people what the sort of like quarantine like
shelter in place, what how that would go down? And
in retrospect, like legally they're not going to like not
allow you to get your groceries and your medicine, you
know what I mean, Like they're like that situation is

(07:11):
probably not going to happen, but they should have explained
that before all these rumors started circulating of how they
were going to deal with it, you know what I mean.
And then that's what caused people to panic and like anyway,
so we are basically there's been some some major stresses

(07:31):
like every I'm sure almost everybody in this country is
going through right now. But part of the weird thing
is like we're now sort of homeowners and we have
a house, like I we weren't getting our mail. I
had our mail for it and it wasn't arriving, and
so then the post office said our address isn't real.

(07:52):
So I had to go to the post office and
they said they mixed the road and avenue. And then
I met the mail carrier and he was like, he
was like, yeah, mail was addressed to here, but I
didn't believe it because no, I've never I've never delivered
mail to this house. Well, we're in this situation where
like we've moved, but we didn't know we moved until
we moved. And now it's just like how do you

(08:14):
get all your life and paperwork in order? And like
you live here now, like do you know? It's just
I think a lot of people are having this issue
where like I think there's people who are like pregnant,
pregnant or have little babies who were like, you know,
we just don't want to risk like waiting this out
in New York City or whatever, and I like, I
know people should stay where they are, but I do

(08:35):
think some people have like extenuating circumstances where it's really
like a lot better idea for them to just like
get out of the way. Um. I don't know, it's
but um, especially if you can do it like in
your car and just like leave and not like quarantine
for a few days and not like encounter anyone if
you're moving, you know, moving. I mean we had a

(08:57):
situation where we could drive straight from here from our
apartment to an empty house and interact with a single person. Um. Yeah,
I don't know, it's just it's a very weird situation.
I feel like that's the fact. No, but like the
fact that we're in this house is making it extra weird.
Like it just feels I don't know, it's hard for

(09:21):
me to not read too deeply into like the meaning,
the spiritual meaning of all this. And I'm like, I
feel like I was brought back to my home state
to like wait out this weird life event. And you
were brought back to your like ancestral home that you're
that has been in your family for like four generations.

(09:42):
My great grandfather probably fled here to escape the Spanish flu. Yeah,
I don't know. Massachusetts is kind of like a spooky
state to like wait out, you know, like if like
a disease. I mean we are, we're a a few
miles from Plymouth Rock. Yeah, I don't know what that symbolizes,

(10:05):
but the karma, boy, we're really narrowing down where we are,
so anyway, we found out that the mailman can't deliver
us our mail because technically this house is on a
county road and are the addresses on the like a
little bit in from that road, and there's a mailbox,
and they won't bring us our mail because we got

(10:27):
to have a mailbox on the big road. So I
went to Low's. I bought a mailbox, a post, a
whole digging tool, cement, and some sticky letters, and I
am going to do the most home home project de
project I've ever done. It's weird. It's hard not to

(10:48):
feel like you're like a homesteader when you're here, because
we're in this like spooky old house with like many
bedrooms and like there it's just like, um, it's sort
of haunted, like it's just run down in a very
natural way, where like no one is here very much,
like no one is ever here more than like a week.

(11:10):
So it's like just kind of this it's bizarre. But
every time, so my dad would come here, you know,
in the fifties when he was a kid, and his grandfather,
who was sort of a very serious, sort of mean dude.
We just put put everyone to work and you just

(11:32):
have to always be cutting tree stumps out of the
yard and climbing into the attic to fix the thing.
So when I started coming here, you arrived and you
like just reflexively started picking up sticks around the backyard
like you were like we had to clean up the yard,
like you're just like went into home improvement mode. Immediately
called my dad and I was like, there's some mold
on the edge of the roof outside. I gotta go

(11:54):
get the thing from the And I was like, I
think we need to replace the horseshoe pits. I raked
the horseshoe It's I was like, I looked up how
to get some lumber and weather it. I was like,
I'm gonna rebuild these horseshoe pits. I don't have time
for this, but boy, we uh we ordered a bunch
of stuff. I'm building a mailbox. It's yeah. We're like

(12:20):
we're cooking more food for every meal of the day
than we've ever cooked in our lives. We're taking walks
just NonStop. It's like I just feel like any second
I'm going to tap maple syrup out of a tree
and like start, you know, like a potato garden and

(12:40):
pretty pretty soon we're going to accuse our neighbors of
being witches and we're gonna have a witch trial. Oh no,
I'm I'll be the only witch around here. You're gonna
get burned at the steak done me. I'm a real
I'm gonna be John Proctor. Yeah? Is that that's that right? Crucible? Um?

(13:01):
So how about our kids. We're parents, this is a
parenting podcast. We've seen so much of our kids this week.
It's just so stop, so much um homeschooling. So I
feel weird about this because the teacher, the system, the
remote learning. Boy there, they're doing their best, but it's

(13:23):
it's a real convoluted system. I'll say for me, it's
just not going to work like it digitally teaching kids
is not really going to be engaging unless it's like
really entertaining like YouTube channel and like it's story Pirates Radio,
which launched today. Every day at eleven am, you can
from eleven to twelve. It's a live radio show. Check

(13:45):
that out. Yeah, I just think it has to be natural.
And like when I get those I got, I swear
to god, it felt like we got a thousand emails
from his school this week and he's a kindergartener. Like
what do they think he's slipping up on it in
the span of five days, Like everyone just slow your role.
They like they're not asking us to turn anything in.

(14:06):
The teacher sends its omes and I don't. All of
her emails are no reply, so you can't. You don't
have the option to ever weigh in on like anything
that's happening. That said, she emailed me today really directly,
and I think she's emailing everybody, but she just wants
to check in, and I'm going to tell her all
about Daddy's school. I just think like the way that

(14:28):
we like interact with them, if we're going to sit
there and like draw and stuff, is sort of more
naturally educational than any like weird like thing that's some
learning center. Is just like quote unquote, Brin keeps like

(14:49):
making these stories and it's like the dragon farted and
then like and it's just they're like they're so like
gross and dumb, but it makes him want to sit
there and draw and write and like do things for hours.
So we do every day we do Daddy School, which

(15:09):
which I called it the first day. Um and now
Britain is very serious about attend daddy school, and we
have achieved. I mean it's one on one learning, so
you're going to get through far more stuff than we
went a one to sixteen ratio or whatever his classes.
So the kid is good at math and now he

(15:32):
can do addition and subtraction like millions. I'll say, this
week I realized, like Mayven is starting to like read
and do math. Like she I wrote mom on the beach,
and she walked up to it from above and said wow.
And then she said and then she looked at it
again and she was like mom, like she like under

(15:55):
she it was like so weird. And then she was
doing math tonight at the table sort of she was
like saying how many people were in the room and stuff. Um,
I mean today she cracked math. I mean because I
haven't paid any attention to her because the child still
takes up all the attention. But I was saying tonight
at dinner, though, is like as these second child, she

(16:18):
gets like a contact high version of education. Like she's
just like she witnesses Brian's learning every day and she
just picks it up through osmosis. Yeah, I mean she
the musicality of it. She picks up. But today was
the first day. I was like, all right, Maven, you
get a math lesson. I gave I wrote a sheet.

(16:39):
I was just all these really hard math problems for
Brian to keep them busy so I could actually focus
on Maven. And she knows, like, you know, one plus
one two plus two, that's simple things. And then I
actually sat down and explained to her how to do it.
And then I gave her one plus one, one plus two,
one plus three four and then two plus one two,
pus three three posts one you posted do three? Is

(17:00):
we all the way up to five posts? Whatever? But
I gave her that sheet, and for the first time ever,
like she did every single one up to five plus
five um, And I think there's just someone actually paid
attention to her for more than five seconds. And then
she's like, oh, I get it, and she does this
weird finger counting thing, which she got everyone correct now

(17:23):
teaching brand long division long uh or not long division multiplication.
He multiplied, you know, eight thousand times more than I
could do right now, I had to remember how to
do it. I was like, you don't mind this up.
And but Bran we started that today and he gets it.

(17:45):
I mean, he's five, but I don't remember when you
learn that. Um, but we're gonna drill more multiplication in school.
You learn that and like fifth grade that's before then.
But I don't know. But also they might do it
different now ethic math, they keep changing it. Yeah. Um,

(18:06):
I like to leave the math to you, like you
can be the math teacher. I'm fine with that. I
love it. We should have our domains. My class was
like a little bit more free for we learned music
today too. When you come to my class, we come
to explore where's the leading us today? Well, I have

(18:27):
my sister has been doing some little lessons with them,
and it's like very like nature based, and she got
a bird feeder and stuff, and she was We had
the craziest moment where she was making she wanted to
make like bird watching journals, and I was like, oh, well,
maybe it could be like an animal journal, so it
could be all the animals you see throughout the day.

(18:48):
So they're making these birden animal journals to catalog what
they see and write as they finished, Like Mayven and
Brin both spell out the title page of the book,
A turkey starts walking through the backyard, giant aggressive turkey. Well,
just like the funniest little turkey, like walking alone and
like you guys talking about me. It just was like

(19:11):
the timing of it couldn't have been more perfect, and
it was like it just you know, I love signs. Well.
The night before so Nick and I have been doing
trick shows via zoom live streaming, which is insane the
whole other story, and the night before we did a show.
The main plotline was a giant turkey who takes over

(19:34):
New York City and becomes a giant like Batman esque
crime boss and the only way to kill this giant
turkey and he was rough and everyone up and the
next day, this aggressive turkey comes into the yard. It's insane, crazy,
it's I also saw a raccoon this morning when I
was up at five am, because he found the garbage

(19:57):
in the garage yet that we can't throw away because
this town doesn't have garbage collection, so you have to
go get a garbage permit from town hall and use
a special bag. And a townhouse closed because he was
climbing on a kayak. He was like, I'm sorry what
he was climbing on a kayak across the way. That's

(20:19):
what are you saying, I'm trying to get away? Huh. Yeah,
So I gotta go. I gotta go back home tomorrow
night to get stuff to forage for supplies. Yeah. Boy,

(20:42):
this whole week is so surreal because like when I
was like packing to leave our home, it was like
this flash of like is this the last time I'll
be here? Like what is happening? Like you know, it's just, um,
this week has been so up and down, Like emotionally,
I think like when we stay off the computer and

(21:05):
social media, I feel like we have a chance to
calm down and just like eat a meal and like whatever.
But um, yeah, it's just been such a crazy way.
I did have a full, like emotional breakdown in Lows today.
I was looking for cement. I had a cart full
of mailbox pieces a mailbox to post all the things,

(21:29):
and then I just had a moment. I was like
where is the cement? And then it just became a
truly overwhelming task. So one fine cement and to know
how much cement I needed and what kind And I
literally just stood there in the aisle for like, I'm
really interested to see how this project is gonna I'm

(21:52):
gonna do it or I'm gonna lose my mind. That's
gonna one of them. Two. I'm gonna build this god nailbox. Um, yeah,
it'll be fun. Um there's I mean, normally this section
of the podcast is our weekend review, and I feel

(22:14):
like we barely even got to like so much happened,
so much has happened. I spent so much of this
week just like completely overwhelmed by the fact, like now
that I got some I got ahold of some serr attack,
I'm more medicated. But when I was, when I was
just taking allegra, it was and before we got a
new mattress cover for the mattress, like, I was just

(22:38):
like my whole head was constantly so inflamed, and the
kids were just jumping on me NonStop, and you were
taking loud conference calls, and like I was just allergic
to like every surface and it felt like and I
was just like, what is this life? Like I was
like I had that today. I've been fine until until
I was in the middle of lows. Yeah, I was

(23:00):
like I might At one point I thought I might
just leave this cart right here and walk out into
the snow because I can't touch it, Corona, I can't
touch things. Yeah, anyway, just natural reactions that I think
everyone is happening having this week is like just everyone
is like what the like, especially people who are trying

(23:24):
to figure out child care and people who are trying
to figure out how to work from home and make
their companies work from home, and like, just so much
change for so many people all at once. It is
so much uncertainty. I mean, so most of our friends
are artists who have real sort of slapped together type
of employment. So many people we know are just like

(23:45):
their income is just cooperated over. So you know, part
of my job at Story Parts is to um it's
like cast all of the shows that happen all the time.
So there's no shows to be cast. So I sent
to sign up out really just to be like, hey,
how are you what are you doing? You know, this
is like a hundred plus people, and most people are like, well,

(24:10):
I'm unemployed, I don't know what to do. I'm stuck
with my apartment in New York City, varying varying levels
of panic. And it was really I was really happy
to read it just because it makes you feel less alone,
and also to know that like we are, we're doing great.
We are told we have nothing to complain about, compared
to so many people who truly I don't know what

(24:33):
they're gonna do. Yeah, that's like I feel really grateful
in a lot of ways, and I feel like in
some ways, I feel like life has really prepared us
for this moment. Like I feel like having kids, I'm
very prepared for social distancing. Like I'm like, I can
handle this. I never get to see anyone like I don't.

(24:55):
We moved to the suburbs when was born and never
made any friends. Yeah, I'm like, I'm fine with that. Commuting,
We'll figure that out. Like the trying to do work
is going to take some scheduling and some finagling. But
I think, like I think it was so hard about
this week is that we didn't have systems and we
didn't have proper boundaries in place of like like today

(25:17):
was the first day all week where you kept the
kids away from me and there was a door closed
and it was like mommy is working and I was
actually not interrupted for like stretches of more more than
twenty minutes. Like it was so much better for me
to just to know, like oh, keep them away from
this person until this time. It's just like I have

(25:38):
found it's so bad for my sanity if I'm not
able to be productive in any way, like work wise,
Like it's like ideally I get to work on all
the things I care about. But if I can just
get grabbed at least a couple of hours to feel
like I've been useful, it's like it's so much better
for my mental health. Otherwise it just feels so insane

(26:02):
um and I don't, like, I don't know if this
was a vacation, that would be one thing and I
could just unplug, But it's like it's not. I've just
I've already missed, Like I've been severely unproductive for like
a full week of work, and I'm like, okay, I
have to Like the middle of all this, we haven't
had a plan, we haven't had a daily schedule, and

(26:24):
for me, suddenly Story Parts, which is our busy season
going into like forty schools in a month, suddenly we're
have to completely reinvent ourselves and we have to figure
out how to digitize all of our in person stuff.
And so I had to figure out how to do
that sort of by myself in two days, um, and

(26:47):
so I've been going NonStop um. And it's exciting in
a weird way. And then also I have moments where
I'm like, I'm crying in lows. Yeah, it's like it's
weird for us because our our work was already so
wildly unpredictable in terms of income and opportunity. So like,
in some ways, I'm like, this is just bringing everyone

(27:08):
down to our level of like what's next. But I
also like, do you have these moments where you're like,
is there just not going to be any industry for
anything for six months? Like you just like, yeah, and
we're trying to close on a house right theoretically next week,
but instead now it's probably scheduled to happen at the

(27:33):
crest of the coronavirus cases. There's like you go back
and forth between like panic and then this moment of
resignation where you're like, well, no one knows anything about
anything anymore. It sort of feels exciting that the rules
are gone. It is like I'm like, you know what,
at a certain point, we just have to agree, like
time is no longer real, money is not real. None

(27:54):
of this stuff is real. It's just like, figure it out,
get the food to people who need the food. Wipe, wipe.
Let's let's you know, you know, I think Fanos really
had a point, you know what I mean, I don't
know what that is. Oh boy, all right, that's end
the segment and I'll explain the plot of Avengers, and

(28:23):
now it's time for we knows what they're watching. This
is where we talk about what our kids are seeing,
not necessarily TV, although they're seeing plenty of that these days. Um,
we want to now examine the current state of the
world through our kids eyes. I think it's safe to

(28:45):
say that they're they're pretty really unaware. They're like that
something's weird, but not really. He's not really asking a
lot of questions. I think he's still he's in a
like little kid vacation because we're in a different house
than he's normally in and we're all together with him
and his auntie Alley is here and her dog, and

(29:07):
he's just like time is so not real to him
that he doesn't know like how long he's been here.
He did say, are we going home on Saturday? Oh? Yeah,
I was like, I guess that is. I did say
we were going for two weeks in the beginning. Well, anyway,

(29:29):
I don't know. Those kids are very does not care. Yeah,
she's having the time of her life, fashioning around the
house eating snacks. They're both eating a million apple and
peanut butter is their new jam is. Brent has had
like fifteen apples. This is like the crazy thing of

(29:50):
our new homesteader life is that we all just eat
way more fresh food because we're just at home and
you can like cut things up easily and like speak
for yourself. My diet has been a disaster. Oh. I
mean I'm also eating a lot of sugar, but I
feel like I'm meeting a lot of fresh food too. Yeah,
you made brownies today and I scarved him. I made

(30:15):
those brownies with the kids as my afternoon activity because
if I like to do things that feel sort of
educational but also like purposeful. I'm not saying you did
a bad thing. I just hated that you did it.
So we made those brownies and then I was letting
them dump these like Reesey's pieces into the brownies, and
they Rec's pieces, yeah, Reese's pieces, and they were losing

(30:40):
their minds at the candy and like they were just
like when they were waiting for the brownies to be
done and they were like hugging each other in anticipation
and like shrieking, and they were doing a countdown on
the microwave, and I was like, this is really they're
having the time of their lives. This is like very epic.

(31:05):
And then I had to hide the bag of candy
from them. Obviously I've explained, I mean, we talked about
this a bit. Uh was it last week or the
week before? You know, the listener says, how do you
explain to her daughter who are biological father was? And
I really, I really went with the playbook of my mom,

(31:28):
which was I've explained this whole thing to Britt and
just that tone of like I didn't show him that
I was scared. I was like, yeah, you know, you
could if people are sick or old and they get
this day, they could die, and and the dangers of it.
And you could see him registering the weight of things.

(31:48):
But it still was a like wow, it doesn't affect
me type of attitude. I think with this they're not
really understanding it. But once again, they're learning through us.
Most is based on our behaviors. So like I feel like,
for in terms of my childhood and what I picked
up from my parents and grandparents, it was very like

(32:10):
don't waste food, don't waste things, like you're not going
to have a lot of these things, like you know
what I mean. And like what I have noticed since
we've been here, I haven't even been harassing the kids
about washing their hands as much because now we're just
in a contained space. But they started trying to wash
their hands more. And I feel like it's just because
they see us like washing packages down and like washing

(32:32):
her hands like they're spraying. They're kind of just like
absorbing the cleaning anxiety. Like we've like we got down
on our hands and knees and scrubbed many floors with
bleach the other day. Like our kids are like, okay,
I guess we need to wash things, um, but they

(32:54):
still have only taken one bath since Is that true?
That is unaccepted? Bowl Although when's the last time I
had a shower? I was at Lows, you know, after
my breakdown like two or three times a day because
I'm covered in dust my well. I went I finally
went to check out at Loews and I got in

(33:14):
line and everyone's you know, super healthy distance for everyone's
real quiet and nervous. And I buy this thing from
this real like that will be type of gangly young man.
As I was paying, I was like, oh, I can
smell this kid's bo This is like a dirty kid.

(33:36):
And then I then I rolled away and smelled it
again and realized, oh, it's me. I haven't showered in
two days. I'm wearing an ewak adventure caravan of courage
hoodie hoodie hooded sweatshirts. And I looked disgusting and I'm
crying and lows, Uh, everybody's gonna cry sometimes. Yeah, And

(34:01):
I did it looking for a cement. I got eighty
pounds of cement and it started raining outside. It's like
is this going to turn solid? Is this going to
get wet? Boy a boy? Yeah. I have these like
heavy moments where it's like I finally get to be
alone for a second, and then I sit there and
I'm like I would be like this, this is really happening,

(34:26):
Like like you just like realized, like you're like this
is gonna be a while, okay, um, but yeah, we'll
we'll be fine. We're very lucky. We're in a good situation. Here.
You know, it's not great, it's you know, work. We
have this home purchase coming up, and we have some
renovations that we're going to do and some of the

(34:46):
funding of that. Yeah, I don't He's tied up in
the stock market. So so I'm watching that knowing I
shouldn't even look at it right now. Right now, I
just want to think about like the day today of
like do we have food, and like are their killer

(35:08):
germs on our hands and now in our eyes? My
brother coronavirus More than anything sometimes I guess, go ahead,
what no keep mumbling under me talking so it's intelligible
what either of us is saying. Listeners heard it. I'm

(35:28):
just kidding what I forgot what I'm saying. Um, I
don't know. I was talking about how my brother had coronavirus.
Are you still there? Yeah? I forgot what I'm saying.

(35:55):
All right, I'm gonna tell yah. I you know, I
can't function with the noise coming at me. That's part
of my pain of this whole week is just like
I need space and like I need room to think
where there's not like talking happening happening. You know, we
need to do right now Beth, just gonna take a

(36:16):
hard left turn into a different segment. Within this segment,
I think we need to do a quick We know
it's what they look like because people keep sending us
baby photos. Are you ready? Okay, this is something we
don't need to think about. Um boy, great, this is

(36:36):
uh just listen to U. Hi, guys, just listen to
Mommy's Fired Forever. So not only did you discuss winter
coats and car seats, but you had baby pick segment. Oh. Yes,
My wife and I run a lodge in northern Maine.
We have two kids, Walter's two and Annie's five months.
We had to shut down for the season two weeks
early because of COVID nineteen. We are closed in April. Anyway,

(37:00):
I was gonna just send the picture of Walter and
his car seat, but I didn't want to leave Annie out,
so a bunch of other cute picks. So apologize for
sending so many. Thanks for all the insight and humor
making parents a little less stressful. Our kids seem to
be similar in ages at age difference. Um, so your
insight is particularly helpful. All right, Betty BETHA, you're ready

(37:20):
photo jackpot ready for this here we go. Just give
me the Okay, I'm just gonna give Beth the phone.
And just so you know, the last photo is is
the jackpot. Right here we go. Thanks Fresh. We're gonna
listen to Beth like how you explained how I would
inherit Um. Okay. I'm looking at a very sweet asleep

(37:47):
boy in a car seat and mittens and he's has
a book called Never Touch a Porcupine sitting on his
lap that he's holding in his sleep. That's very very cute.
What wait, Will, are you kidding me? That's the name
of the book. Yeah. So we started Story Parts Radio
today and my character Peter called in and I was

(38:07):
given a brand new pet from a kid listener and
it was a porcupine. And the whole bit was me
trying to snuggle the porcupine and hurting myself over and
over and over and over again. It's another animal sign.
I guess I looked at this picture and didn't process that.
And then I'm looking at another cutie. I think he
said this is daughter, right, this is the younger one.

(38:30):
She's on skis and she's very cute and she has
very cute cheeks. And oh, the last picture is a
baby in a bathtub looking very surprised. That is the
real good. Just slippery shocked baby face. Slippery shocked baby face,

(38:52):
those little slippery bodies. They're like, why am I wet?
What is what's happening? What is that? Is? How I
deal this week is like I keep texting my friends
and we're like, what is time? What is life? Who
am I? Where? Where am I? Babe? You don't hurt me?
What is this? Don't hurt me? No one knows. Um.

(39:15):
That was from Mike, Thank you Mike. This one comes
from Craig uh uh In this time it's a bit scary,
but there's still excitement of a new addition to the family.
My new son born today with his five and two
year old sisters. Oh my god, look at this. Not

(39:37):
a stressful time to have a baby at all. Oh
my god, so cute little fox. Jammy's on this baby
get out of town. Big sister in a big sister shirt.
Other big sister taking in the weight of her reality,
shifting from being youngest to middle What do you think
it was a bigger deal the pandemic or new sibling?

(40:02):
Mm hmmm. I don't really remember being like having feelings
about my sister being there, aside from being really excited
to have a sister. So I don't think I think
because I was older, I didn't. I wasn't like I'm
the baby. Like you know, I was like five years
old when my sister was born. Well me too, I
was like five or six when my little brother was born. Yeah.

(40:24):
I was really mature and it was so cool about
it and didn't really have I remember, I'm still cool
with it, and I don't even resent her. It's not
a big deal, so much so that you're gonna let
her live with us and her dog. She lives with
us now forever. Okay, one more baby. Make sure there's
a lot more, guys, but I didn't look out, so
there's one more. This is from Nicola. Were jumping on

(40:44):
the baby bandwagon. So here we go photos of my
daughter for when she was six weeks old, nine weeks old,
then six months old. The last one is not downloading.
I'm so sorry, but but these first two are great.
Describe it bath ready. Last one go it takes so
long to pass the phone. Okay, so, oh my god.

(41:04):
It's a baby with a Christmas present bow on its
head and a little bib, chunky cheeks. Oh my god,
there's a sad face baby with the lip the lower
lip is so good. Oh my god. Um, our kids
were doing sad faces tonight and being really insane. Um.

(41:30):
Oh boy. Basically looking at baby pictures really brought me
out of Uh. You know that's why I keep trying
to post some fun bids of our kids. Well, I
mean I've managed to post like too, because there's never
any time to think. But they're like, I feel like
we need a little like levity in this time, and
I'm like, I really feel like we need to be

(41:54):
mindful of our social media presence and not put more
like chaos out. If you would like to hear delightful
story that does have um butts and death in it
written by Brian, you go to my Instagram um and
please enjoy. Oh my god. Yeah, Brennan, So can we
talk about these books they made? Yeah, real quick, we

(42:16):
knows what they're writing. They Brennan Maven both wrote books
this week. And Maven's book is called Unicorns Are Everywhere,
And she dictated that book too. Yeah, she dictated the
book to my sister and then on every page regardless
of the caption. Maven drew a unicorn in the same

(42:38):
position on every page. It says, like the bad guys
destroyed the castle, and it's a picture of a rainbow unicorn.
They rebuilt the castle a picture of a green unicorn.
But like the pages are so great because it's like
the unicorns were everywhere. The unicorns went anywhere they wanted.

(43:02):
Like it was just like her trying to come up
with the caption for each page, just like with no sequencing.
And then the last page is the only page with
no illustration, and it just says the unicorns were done
the end. And Brent's book is about a dragon who
I believe kills a unicorns unicorn. Yeah, And he was

(43:25):
like that's funny, right, and she's like yeah. It was
like it felt very much like a like an inappropriate
workplace dynamic. It was just like he's like, it's funny
how I made this thing where you die, isn't it?
Like She's like, yeah, well, yeah, cool, I'm cool with this.
In the end, he says, Sam, the dragon didn't want

(43:48):
any friends. He was happy to be alone. The end. Yeah,
it was really haunting ending inappropriate for the times, right.
It was like after he killed two unicorns, and it
was like he really just wanted to be alone that
he didn't know that he killed them. Oh yeah, he
didn't realize when he was like shooting fire at them.

(44:09):
I think he wrote he didn't realize he killed another unicorn. Yeah,
plausible deniability. Uh so you gotta that's why you had
you just looked the other way. UM. I definitely got
to post a picture of that story. This next segment

(44:40):
is called Listeners Want to Knows, where we take questions
and comments from you guys. All right, here's some quick ones.
Here we go. This one comes to us from John.
Subject line children licking high beat than Peter. Our family
got haircuts a couple of weeks ago, and our three
year old son licked a random coat that was hanging
up multiple times. Yesterday he licked at the top of

(45:02):
the croc I was wearing as we were playing outside.
I just wanted to share you have the good work,
the best of black Stags safe John. That makes me
feel better. That's what makes me feel so much better
about coming out here to the middle of nowhere sort
of is like we can take the kids outside, then
go in the yard, then go on the beach. They

(45:23):
still won't touch anything that anyone else has come near,
because if we were to take them anywhere, even just
out our front door at our apartment, they would encounter
things other people had touched and our coop just every door,
not just like people. And they just be licking and
touching everything, rolling around just like, you know, putting their

(45:46):
hands on the floor every chance, Like that's just they're animals.
They're wild animals, and we'd rather have them licking things
that wild animals are licking, like pine cones and sticks outside.
And I kind of didn't realize how much we are
like city folk until we spent a week out here,

(46:07):
and now our kids are just like covered in dirt.
Yeah you know, I'm just like you really hit the
l at folk. Yeah. I just wanted to be clear,
just folk. We know who we are. Um yeah, we're
real natural soundings country folk. Um real quick. Uh. Our

(46:33):
friend ellian I wrote in to tell us about Lunch
Doodles with Moe Williams, which we we did hear about
and we have watched there. It does seem like there's
some good content popping up online of educational stuff. People
like a story of Fars Radio every day at eleven am. Yeah,

(46:54):
and Moe Williams does Doodles with Moe Williams at one pm.
I think livestream. There's a lot of good stuff out there.
Williams the children's book author, illustrator who does the pigeon ones, right,
you don't let the pigeon drive the bus. The elephant
and Piggy kind of a big deal. Yeah Williams. Ever

(47:16):
heard of him? Okay, you get the picture. You get
the picture. We don't tell you twice. Um. Yeah, So
I mean right into us and tell us what you
guys are finding. We we were. It occurred to me
to try to do some research for this, but then
I thought, you know what, we're going to be here
for a while. We'll see we'll see what we'll see. Yeah,

(47:38):
we'll see what our kids are actually responding to. Because
we haven't had a chance to really do We haven't
really done any rigorous homeschooling aside from what we bragged about. Um,
I mean, daddy School has taken off. People want to
join me for daddy School. We will be streaming live
at random times because we don't have a plan and

(47:58):
forget about it. The correct element Daddy School is largely
dictated by the children in the room where daddy is yeah,
and what Daddy is thinking that Brent's teacher just posted
a new announcement. Attached is the uh sorry it'sloading. Attached
is the literally lesson with miss name. I'm not going

(48:21):
to say cream. No one wants to hear you read
this email. I thought it was gonna be exciting, all right,
last one? They so, But I will say one of
the daddy school activities that I think was a success
is the kids alternated drawing every letter of the alphabet
and then drawing a picture of something that started with
that letter and hanging it around their room. So so

(48:43):
that that is officially the classroom now because it has
the capital at LoQ s alligator alligator. Yeah, We're like,
we're loocky to be in a very large house right now,
God with room for a classroom. If we were still
in our apartment, two would have been murdered. First, I

(49:04):
know many of you are and we want to hear
from you. Um, I'm gonna let's do one more email.
Then I'm gonna finish that thought. Last one, Beth, Ready,
here's a good old fashioned would you knows scenario? This
comes to us from Lily, Would you knows what to
do if one day, when you're waiting at the airport

(49:25):
and when if your kids had a sneezing attack but
also a bloody knows So they were sneezing blood all
over themselves and the people next to them, and the
other kid was screaming their head off and throwing a
tantrum in the middle of the airport. How would you react.
I feel like this is one of those Yes, your
kid is sneezing blood on the other kid and neighbors,

(49:48):
and the other kid is freaking out. Its not happening
in the middle of coronavirus because we're probably not traveling
by air. I bet this did happen, or this is
just a nightmare Lily had. Well in I might have
happened before we were experiencing a pandemic. Well, this email
was sent a week and two days ago, so it
was literally a lifetime ago. Yeah it was at Yeah

(50:11):
that was a full year ago. Um okay, So I'm
gonna answer this question as if there is an a
pandemic happening, how would I react? Uh? I would be like,
oh my god, sorry, um well really, oh my god,

(50:31):
sorry oh my god, sorry you guys. Oh man, I
guess I would like hopefully have some baby wipes on
me that I could like hand out to people. I
would throw my child's head in a backpack, just let
him sneeze it out in there. This used, you know
when we this is just marked when we started this

(50:55):
podcast we had which you know is similar to this.
That really stressed me out, and I was like, oh
my god, what would this happen in public? I would
just bury their head in something and run them to
the bathroom and nothing to see here, nothing to see
here type of attitude. But I'm a changed man, and
in this scenario, I'm like people can deal. Especially this

(51:17):
week everything like Mayven first thing this morning tripped and
split her lip open on the floor, and then like
she later in the day was like had like brownie
like chocolate all over her. And I was looking at
her at the end of the day and she was
like all dirty and just had like blood and chocolate

(51:38):
on her shirt. And I was like, Wow, we're really
living the life is their life now? We're real country folk.
We're country folk country folks. And you know what, if
you got to bleed, you bleed where you is, you know.
I mean it's a different thing. If I was in
an airport right now during coronavirus and my child started

(52:00):
shooting blood at people, I would feel much worse. I mean,
hopefully someone would like squeeze out some hand sanitizer for
everybody and they could just they can't because they don't
have any, because their neighbor bought a whole garage full
of it. I went into Usually somebody has some handy.
I went into Walgreen's today next to the post office,

(52:21):
just to be like, I wonder if there's any cleanings
to put. Nope, a single thing. Neither did lows. Yeah, guys,
just spread out. Don't buy ten thousand things. Don't buy
ten thousand things. People buy a thousand things. That's all
you need. Well, this has been another episode of We

(52:45):
Knows Parenting. Do we answer that question? Boy, I think
we're just like we have. We'd clean it. The answer
is I would panic and handle it poorly. The answer
is I would freak out. I would walk away and
say I don't know who that kid is. If he
were my kid, I'd be embarrassed. I would run to
the bathroom with the child, leave my luggage and never

(53:08):
come back again. I would I'd leave my cart full
of cement in the middle of the aisle, in this
case my child and just get on a plane to
another place. And that's where we're going to leave you,
dear listeners, this has been another episode we knows parenting.
Here's here's what I want. I want want to hear
how you guys are coping, and I want to hear

(53:29):
how what fun activities are you doing with your kids
to kill time? How are you managing your work schedule
with being a teacher now? And how are you managing
your time with a partner if you have one? Um? Yeah,
or if you're single parenting it, which God bless you.
Um um? How are you doing in tiny apartments? Are

(53:53):
you in New York City where you're especially trapped other places? Similarly,
are you in a place where it feels like this
is all overblown crazy, not a real thing. It is
a real thing. Um, good for you. If you're not
near New York City, Well this took a turn, um,
but let us know how you're doing. Good for you, assholes,

(54:15):
how your parenting life has changed. We'd love to share
um activities and your stories and yeah, stay safe. Out there. Um, okay.
You can email us any of that at we knows
Pod at gmail dot com, or you can leave us
a voicemail, which we would love at three four seven

(54:36):
three eight four seven three nine six, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook,
we knows Pod review, Subscribe by my book. There's no manual,
honest and gory wisdom about having a baby. Listen to
story Price Radio live every day this week at eleven am.
It's free this week. Um after that, uh, let's just

(54:57):
listen to it. And story Price Podcast launches every Thursday.
You know you're looking for digital content. Let's do it, guys,
and we'll talk to you next time. Babem

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